Chapter 2: The Light

A/N
For the original readers of `Love from the couch´: Sorry guys! I haven't updated this in months! I'm such a lousy person. You probably don't remember what the first chapter was about, too.
Well, good!
I have changed the first chapter completely and I hope it's better now. I sort of got rid of the songfic thing, so if you have complaints: tell me!

It's a little fluffy-the-fluffluf and it ran away with me. My beta thinks this chapter is weird, but she wouldn't explain why… It probably is. So if you think it's weird, let me know okay? This was supposed to be a one shot.. But it was not enough for the gods of fanfiction. Or plot bunnies, according to pretty good some writers out here. ^^ Anyways, here it is. Enjoy.

When Lisbon came into the bullpen that morning, she felt that something was off. Nothing big, just some slight difference in the air... It made her feel a little bit uneasy. She shrugged the feeling off, thinking that it was just because she'd come in early today. Heading for her office, Teresa almost tripped over a comic book that was laying on the floor next to Rigsby's desk. With a deep sigh -because Superman, really?- she put her bag on Van Pelt's desk. Determined to make sure the book would never see the light of day again (and preferably not somewhere Hightower would ever see it) she heard it. A small, almost dismissive sound coming from her office. If she hadn't been a detective, she would probably never have heard it, but her job required to pick up on things like this. Alarmed, her hand reached for her gun. With her weapon drawn, she silently approached her working place, expecting anything...

Forget that.
She had been expecting anything but this: her snotty, annoying, pain-in-the-ass consultant was laying on her couch. Seemingly asleep. But that couldn't be. Patrick Jane didn't sleep. Lisbon knew he was suffering from insomnia for as long as she remembered. Maybe the exhaustion finally caught up with him..? That was possible, but it didn't explain why in all places he was sleeping on HER couch, in HER office. What right did he think he had to be here in the middle of the night? But waking him up seemed... Well, cruel somehow. Lisbon shook her head to get rid of that thought. Why would she suddenly be soft on him now? He was the very reason she got in so early today. The pile of paperwork had been so depressing last night that she had just left it. Against her very nature she left around five, wishing her stunned co-workers a good evening and feeling surprisingly good when she felt the stares burning in her back. Of course, when she woke up this morning around six, she felt guilty about it. Like she knew she would. Apparently, self-changing was a lot harder than she thought it would be. At half past six she found herself in her car, driving to work. And here he was. Mister know-it-all, I-never-tell-you-anything, the most smug jackass she had ever met was laying on her couch. Lisbon decided she had every right to wake him up and make him do some real work for once. The petite agent threw a dark look at the pile on her desk and felt an sudden urge to smack him. When she got closer, though, she froze. Jane was looking as innocent as a freaking angel, his golden locks framing his head like a shining halo. Teresa sighed and decided to just leave him be. He wasn't going to help her anyways. Besides, waking up someone who suffered from insomnia really wás a mean thing to do. He seemed to have pressed something against his chest, though, what seemed to be a kind of note. Curious, she tried to wriggle it from his grasp, but failed. He was grasping it too tightly and didn't she just decided to let him sleep? Her desk chairs creaked a little when she sat down and she startled, hoping she didn't wake him up. Thankfully he was still asleep. She only got up once, to fetch her bag -that she'd left on Van Pelt's desk- and after that threw herself at the files.

She didn't notice when Jane's deep breath suddenly got quiet. Nor that he slowly blinked and opened his eyes. The blond consultant studied the ceiling for a moment, feeling a little dazed. Where was Elvis..? Then his head jerked in Lisbon's direction.
This she noticed, and she looked up with a soft smile.
"Hey sleepyhead, had a good rest?" she asked amused. Speechless, he nodded. Jane sat up slowly, absently trailing a hand through his hair. He opened his mouth but found himself suddenly without words. How would he explain this? He couldn't tell her that 'he kept thinking about her all night long so he decided to go sleep in her office because somehow that helped', could he?
"I, uh..." he tried, thinking hard. "I was...uh,"
"It's okay, Jane," she interrupted him. "If you really want to sleep somewhere you can use my couch... But only if you are really quiet," she quickly added, thinking about him pestering her in her office all day. If he was going to be here without leaving...ever... Horrified, she closed her eyes for a second. No way in hell.
Jane finally had regained his calm and was now grinning softly, guessing her thoughts.
"Thank you, Lisbon, I really appreciate your offer, but I'll be fine." He got up and straightened his grey three piece suit. "I'm going to my own couch now. I have a feeling Elvis misses me," he cheerfully offered as an explanation at her raised eyebrows and left. As soon as he was out the door, he bowed his head in defeat. Because 'for the best' or not, it didn't seem to matter. He couldn't put his love for Teresa away in a drawer. He couldn't forget her.

Minutes after he was gone, agent Lisbon was still wondering what was going on with her consultant. He was acting strange... She even gave him practically an invitation to stalk her in her office all day, and he refused. Lost in thoughts, she didn't notice the scrap of paper until lunch break. Just as she'd stood up to buy herself a sandwich, something caught her eye. Laying on her couch was the note Jane had been holding earlier. It was folded and she really, really, really shouldn't look. But, as she checked by sticking her head out the door, Jane was gone and everyone was too busy to notice anything she did.
And didn't she want to find out what was wrong with Patrick Jane? Besides, he would have taken it with him if it was that important.. Right? With shaking hands she picked it up and folded it open.

She should have known that with Jane, all of her expectations were bound to be off.

Part of her wanted to scream 'Jane!' and yell at him for such a ridiculous prank... But the other part kept telling her that maybe, maybe this was not Jane trying to be funny.
With trembling hands, the female detective stared at the words written on the paper.

Why I love Teresa Lisbon

I love her beautiful green emerald eyes and the smile on her face when she just solved a case and thinks nobody is looking. I love her loyalty to anyone, even those that don't deserve it. And even though she denies it, she is really beautiful. She is the only good thing that is in my life right now.
I love that she is always looking out for me. I love the way she yells at me, when she threatens me while knowing she'll never do any of those things. I love how she secretly wants to fix me, even though I'm beyond repair. I love how she accepts me anyway. I love her embarrassment when she wears a dress or when I caught her secretly singing to herself. I love it when she drinks my tea or hugs me. I love it how she loves me, even though she doesn't realize that yet. Even though I'm me. And I love

After that word, a long trail went over the paper, indicating that he had fallen asleep at that point. Lisbon's hands were shaking when she folded the paper shut and put it down as if it was on fire.

Would Jane really be in love with her? Or more importantly: Was she in love with Jane?
She couldn't be... Could she? Slowly panicking, she started to pace in her office. Of course, Teresa honestly liked her consultant. Even though he was a insufferable jackass, he had proven to be pretty useful on the job. And with a past like his, it couldn't be too abnormal, even though she hated to admit it. Wait, what did it say about him secretly listening to her singing? She was going to kill him for that! No no no: first she had to figure out if she loved him or not. No she didn't. If course she didn't! Then why was she doubting herself so much?
Okay, now she was officially freaking out. She was not. In. Love. With. Anyone. Confident that that was the truth, Lisbon picked up the finished paperwork to give it to Hightower. Pretending that she didn't hear her inner voice screaming at her, she put on a smile and left.

Jane was just coming back from his hiding place one floor down, where he had been spying on people. He'd just wanted to be away so he could think freely. And after a few hours he had realised something. It didn't matter how much he didn't want to be in love with Teresa. It didn't matter that it would complicate things. Forgetting her wasn't going to work anyway. His feelings weren't going to change, and neither were hers. Maybe he should just accept it and... be true to himself. And maybe even be true to her. He blinked a few times. Would it be worth endangering her? Yeah. Yeah, it was. Suddenly his bad mood lifted. Patrick Jane decided he was giving up.

He was going to give in and love Teresa Lisbon.

He looked around and briefly wondered where everyone was, until he realized that it was around lunchtime. Lisbon was gone, too, which was good. Nowadays, he worried about her eating enough during the day.
Speaking of the devil, the consultant heard familiar, soft footsteps behinds him and flashed a grin.

Lisbon strode into the bullpen, her chin raised up high, almost defiantly... And she totally ignored him. Patrick Jane narrowed his eyes, temped to grasp her hand and to ask her what was wrong. Or he could just pull her against him and kiss her senseless -okay, no need to be going crazy now, he felt strange now that he finally had given in to his feelings. Now that he allowed himself to love her, everything seemed bright somehow. Maybe it was just him. He would have almost believed it, if he didn't know her so well. He might even know her better than he knew himself, if that was even possible.
Sometimes he thought he didn't even know himself at all.
She couldn't still be mad about him sleeping in her office, could she? That would be weird, considering that she even told him to do it more often... Well, sort of anyway. Maybe she was angry that he didn't stay? Because she secretly loved him, too? He knew she did.
But she didn't know she did.
Did she?
This was becoming a little too complicated, Jane admitted to himself.
After all she didn't know that he loved her either.

Shock crossed his face when he remembered. No way. There was no way he'd forgotten that note. His hands patted all his pockets, feeling nothing. Coming up with nothing. He wanted to curse at himself for doing something so inevitably stupid.
Okay. She might still think it was a joke.
He toyed with that thought for a moment, but quickly dismissed it. If she would still think that, she would have called him out on it already. No, she was serious. Should he just tell her he loved her? What would she do?

Possibility one: "Lisbon, I love you."
"...Wait a moment, let me get my gun first."
Possibility two: "Lisbon, I love you."
"I love you too! Let's marry, go live in a house with a white picket fence and buy a couch together!"

He dreamily stared in a distance. Buying a couch with Lisbon... That would be the perfect first date. Not to mention the things they could do ON the couch... He quickly got rid of that idea before it got out of hand. Maybe he really should just tell her the truth. After all, she MIGHT just choose the second option...
He finally felt like himself again.

Teresa looked up at a knock on her door. Without waiting for her consent, Jane popped in, smiling wickedly. Oh great, maybe it WAS a joke after all, Lisbon thought embarrassed, immediately regretting her actions. "My dearest Lisbon," he began, leaning with his elbows on her desk. "I want to ask you something very important."
Okay, so maybe it wasn't a joke. The female detective nervously swallowed and tensed.
"Lisbon, will you buy a couch with me?"
"I... Wait, what?"
"Shall we buy a couch together?" he asked, unable to temper his enthusiasm.
"Why?" she choked out, totally taken by surprise.
"Because then we can marry and live together and buy a nice house with a white picket fence."
What was he talking about?
"Why?"
"Because I love you."
That made her fall silent. Very silent. She saw Jane turn a little nervous. Good. Teresa didn't know what made him say all this or how serious she should take this, so she just repeated her statement.
"Why?"
Jane raised one eyebrow.
"Pretending you didn't read my list, are we?" She immediately flushed a deep red. "Well, that's okay. It's the denial that makes it interesting." If possible, her face got even more flustered.
"I... I'm not..."
"Yes, you are." The confidence is his voice left her breathless and she couldn't help but hearing the truth shimmer trough his words. "Maybe I was a bit rash just now," he added, suddenly serious."But my beautiful Teresa, would you go on a date with me?" The female detective suddenly found all her objections flown away into every direction, disappearing into thin air. Hell, she thought, why not? Why not give this a chance even though I'm still not convinced this is going to work? I might as well see how it'll turn out.
"Okay. fine," she muttered. His answering and totally overwhelming 1000-watt smile made her a little dizzy. "But there will be no couch."
"But..." Jane whined.
"Not yet, at least." His eyes lit up. Lisbon sighed. What did she started? She got up from her chair and gave him a small push. "You go back to your pathetic pretend to work. Pick me up tonight at nine?" He nodded and turned to leave, when he suddenly turned around again and grasped her wrist. In a smooth movement, he pulled her to him and their lips linked together. Jane released her before she even had the chance to grasp what just happened, but not before he whispered "you bet," against her lips, lights sparkling in his eyes. And then he was gone, leaving Lisbon behind with trembling lips and shock in her eyes. When she finally got a hold of herself, she sank down in her chair. Through her open door she could see Jane lying on his couch, a huge smile plastered on his face. That made her smile for a second too, even though she would never admit it. The detective stared at the paperwork that she was determined to finish today, and that she never would get done now anymore.

Lisbon huffed and mumbled under her breath:
"you don't like white fences anyways."

_

We all need the darkness
to see the light
in our own eyes

(Jason Mraz - Everything is sound)

The End

A/N Okay, after hours of writing I'm done! What do you think? Better than the previous version? Should I ever write a sequel? Should I be kicked off this site? Will I ever stop these stupid questions that no one reads anyway? Review!