He woke up from a nap and rolled over off of his couch.
"Ugh.." he groaned. It was later in the afternoon already and he felt kind of stir crazy in the house so he decided to take a walk.
It was beautiful outside, right before sunset, everything felt so fresh, so crisp. He smiled to himself as he pulled his jacket on over him and locked his door. Usually he just took walks to kill time, but he was partially enjoying himself today. He walked down the street in the direction of a nearby park. It was a nice park with huge tree's surrounding a small lake, more like a pond, that was just beautiful this time of year. Thin layers of ice would form throughout the pond during the winter, but it never froze completely over. Winter White Orchids were blooming this time of year too. They were huge white orchids with purple tips that ran down to the bud like thin ink.
It was pretty chilly outside but he didn't really mind. The fresh air was a nice relief.
He crossed the street, waving at his neighbor who was running with his dog, and walked into the park. The view was breath taking and he involuntarily smiled. It was sunset and the way the light reflected off the water was incredible. He sat down at a nearby bench and studied it for a long time. His thoughts began to drift to Ed. At first he thought it would be nice for him to see it. Then he thought about all the time they spent together. From when he first enrolled to now.
They used to get along a bit better, he realized. Not at first, no. At first he thought Edward was going to pop a gasket every time he walked in his office. It had always been a little amusing. Calling him short stuff, and asking him to get things off of high shelves. He snickered to himself. He kind of missed that.
He just figured that his subordinate didn't want anything to do with him. And to be honest, he didn't really pay much attention to him if he wasn't there, or if he was busy. The thought made him feel guilty. He tried once when Al had first gotten his body back to cross some distance with him, and he thought it was going pretty well for awhile, but things changed. Inside he knew why, but that was not something he wanted nor was willing to think about.
He sighed, as the last bit of light faded from the sky, cursing himself for not doing something to keep his mind off the whole thing. He sat there for awhile before about five or six ducks wiggled their little tale over to him in the water.
He was surprised to see them, he figured it was still too cold for them to be out. They waddled up out of the water and up to his boots, and started pecking behind him. He moved his feet quickly thinking at first they were after him, but soon realized it was something under the bench.
Curious, he stuck his hand under the bench and got a hold of whatever it was, pulling it back out to examine it. From the look of it, it was bread. He smelt it and smiled realizing it was sweet pumpkin bread.
He opened the plastic and tore off some crumbs, throwing to the hungry ducks. He thought about the sweet bread Gracia made and a ping of guilt hit his stomach. His friend Hughes had only been angry with him a few times in his life, and never so serious.
I need to go talk to him…
After he decided the ducks had enough, he wrapped it up, and set it on the bench. It was a short walk back to his house, and he felt like he needed to get some more sleep. At least to get his mind off of things.
Roy rolled over, shifting uncomfortably in his bed. He hadn't been able to sleep very good. He just felt so guilty, and he couldn't figure out why. Ed had been on his mind all day. Something that was pretty much, scaring the living shit out of him.
Roy had broken up with women before. He had relationships that ended badly. Girls having their feelings hurt. Why did this bother him and that didn't at all?
He took a deep breath and sat up. The red numbers on his alarm clock were bright and the only access of light in his room. The night was cool, a little bit chilly maybe. He threw back the covers and walked into the bathroom. He flipped on the light and rested both hands on the side of the sink.
He couldn't figure out why he was losing sleep over this. He had talked to Ed right? He apologized. So everything should be fine. He should feel fine. These kind of things didn't bother him. He was used to being disliked and called a bastard. Especially by Ed.
But for some reason he didn't feel fine. His stomach twisted up he shook his head trying to rid himself of these thoughts.
Every time he thought of Ed his body reacted, making his skin hot and stomach twist. He'd been ignoring it, or passing it off as something totally unrelated. He didn't want to face what those things meant.
He groaned and rubbed his face with his hands. This was not what he needed to be dealing with. He just wanted to get down to the bottom of this. But the more he thought about it the more confused he got.
At first he had almost been revolted, and now… Didn't he say he like Ed?! Metaphorically?
He lifted his face to the mirror. His skin was pale and dark hair fell over his face messily. His onyx eyes were almost the same color as the dark night outside his open window.
He had to figure out why he was so worried over this. It wasn't like him at all. He didn't fret over small things like this. He didn't fret over Ed. Right?
Sure, Ed was an attractive guy. For a guy.
But there was no way he had feelings for him. Sure he's always entertaining, and he doesn't really mind seeing him, but that doesn't mean anything.
So what really drove him to accept the bet? Anyone else surely would not have gone as far as he did. The night at the bar he really hadn't minded the idea much of kissing him. In fact, it had actually been exhilarating.
Was he attracted…to Ed?
He creased his eyebrows and swallowed hard. This was bad. Very bad.
He knew what attraction felt like. He'd been with plenty of beautiful woman. But they had always been more of a physical attraction. Was…was this more?
He closed his eyes tight. He had to know for sure.
He tried to think of symptoms.
What is this some kind of disease? What's wrong with you?
Okay, so maybe his idea of it was just a little bit off.
How did Ed make him feel?
He realized, with great dismay mind you, that the answer was probably not what he wanted to hear. He was over protective and always worried about him. He got right under his skin and made him want to rip his hair out. He loved to hear his stories, though that's something he'd never admit. But most of all, he loved to hear him talk. He loved the cocky smile that took up his whole face when he thinks he's won, and he loves….
Wait. Where the hell is this going?
Roy internally cursed himself. This wasn't right. He was into girls, he always had been.
There was something about him Roy knew, something that made everything seem to spin out of control. He took his professionalism and practically threw that straight out the window. He always wanted to be more than a boss to him. A friend maybe.
He felt like he'd come to some sort of realization. Like he finally saw something that had been there all along. Had it been there? Did he only ignore it because Ed was a guy?
His head started to spin and he felt himself get dizzy. He led himself onto the floor and rested his hot back against the cool tile wall.
He didn't dare himself to speak. If there was any chance of him going to bed then, it was completely gone now.
This wasn't what he should be feeling. He needed to fix this. This was dangerous. It was a different story
to be worried about your subordinates, but being attracted to them is definitely not okay. Not only that, but Ed was a guy. Roy was Centrals ladies man!
His eyes opened as an idea struck him. He knew how to fix this.
He got off the bathroom floor and walked to his dresser. His pale shoulders reflected moonlight from the window. The shades were drawn and window slid open an inch. A breeze filled the room as he pulled open the first drawer.
He smiled and withdrew his small black book. This was what he needed. Inside the white glassy pages were numbers from his countless experiences with woman. Most of them he barely or did not even remember.
He turned to the back of the book, his favorite pages. They were specifically for his 'numero uno's'. When something was going on at work, or he was seriously stressed, he needed someone he didn't have to take out to dinner or spend energy on. He called them, they came, no questions asked. Then they left. Perfect.
After he made the call he felt a little better. Yeah, that was just what he needed. He felt a little more like himself. Roy didn't bother to get dressed. They wouldn't be in them for very long anyway. He only put on a little bit of cologne and put some coffee on.
He decided he just needed to get back into the swing of things here. After he got laid he'd feel completely back to normal. He was Roy Mustang; Central's leading ladies man. That's what he kept telling himself.
He practically ran the game. He shook the cheating spouse feeling he was getting and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Sure, he'd apologized, but it wasn't like he said he was in love with him or anything. And it wasn't his fault if it hurt the kid's feelings. It wasn't his business anyway. Right?
He set the tooth brush down just as he heard the doorbell ring. He smiled to himself and walked to front door. He opened it and smirked. The red head's long hair fell down to the small of her back and her sky blue eyes batted under curly thick eyelashes. She was gorgeous. As always.
He stepped aside letting the girl into the home. Without hesitation she stepped in and removed her coat, revealing sexy red and black lingerie. She was not new to this routine.
Neither of them were.
She looked at him slyly and it was just like old times.
Without hesitation she turned from him and headed up the stairs.
"Coffee?" Roy asked moving to the kitchen.
"Lovely." She answered.
He took out two glasses from his cabinet and set them on the counter. He poured the cups in silence and hastily brought them to the bedroom.
"Oh dear?" The redhead said from the bathroom. He turned to face her. A smirk crossed her lips. Just like old times.
He handed her a cup and took a sip of his before putting down on the coffee table next to the bed.
She moved around him, holding him from behind at the waist.
"Did my Roy have a bad day" she asked with pouty lips. He sighed.
"It was….rough." he said. She smiled and kissed his back seductively.
"Lets see if we can brighten it up then dah?" she asked. Her accent was as smooth as velvet, but for some reason it was really just not doing it for him tonight. He frowned and looked at the ceiling, cursing under his breath.
She creased her eyebrows and walked around looking Roy in the eyes.
"What's the matter baby? Have something else on your mind?" she asked.
For a moment he didn't say anything. He put his head in his hands and sighed.
"Yes Missey (Mi-zee). I've had a rough day indeed."
She smiled and walked around his room, picking up her coffee. She grabbed his hand and drug him into his living, setting him down on the couch. She then went and fixed them a fire.
Missey wasn't just a convenient "booty call", they had been friends for years. Pretty much his only friend out of work. She understood him more than most people did. Years ago he had considered getting in a relationship with her, but she readily refused. She giggled and said, "I don't think you even really want that."
It didn't bother him much anyway, he was okay with the way things were. Lately they hadn't seen a lot of each other but he still called every once in awhile just to check up on things.
"What is bothering you my baby" She asked worriedly as she sat beside him.
Roy leaned back on the couch and took a deep breath. This was going to be hard to explain. Here he was thinking all he needed was a booty call but the minute she shows up he can't get Ed off his mind.
"I hurt someone yesterday." He started.
"I didn't know how they felt about me and I was pretty selfish with their feelings. I don't know, now that I know, I just feel like I can't get it out of my head." He explained.
She listened and nodded her head.
"Roy baby, you've been alone for a long time." She said
"I've always got you" he interrupted smirking.
She smiled and continued, "You've been alone for a long time, In fact, I don't think I've ever seen you take a chance with anybody. Now, just because you don't feel strongly for anybody doesn't mean you're a bad person, it's just the way it is, but if this person comes in the way of you doing what you love, " she winked. "Then maybe that means it's more important to you than you think."
He listened to her words carefully and almost dreadfully. He knew she was right. Hell, she was always right.
"You can't deny yourself happiness forever." She gave him a kind smile and he returned it.
"At least," she said grabbed his hand lovingly, "At least, spend some time on it. Figure out what it really means before you just drop it."
He sighed and watched the flames from the fireplace lick and consume the wood.
Maybe she was right. Maybe I just appreciate him as a friend and feel bad that I upset him.
He smiled at her, "Thanks babe" he said now relieved.
"Why don't you go run us a bath" she said standing up. "I'll get us some more coffee."
He agreed and made his way up the stairs to his bedroom. She watched him until he disappeared around the corner and then turned to the kitchen.
"I hope this is finally it for him…" she sighed. There wasn't much coffee left so she decided that she'd better make another pot. She pulled over their cups and poured them full, putting a few sugar cubes in, and then took down the ground coffee to start it again. She had just started up the stairs when someone knocked.
She almost didn't answer it given it was so late but she figured it wouldn't hurt anything, she figured it might just be a late package or something. She quickly put down the glasses on the key table and shrugged her coat on loosely.
She opened the door curiously, "Yes?" she asked politely.
Roy yelled from the top the stairs, "Its ready!"
She acknowledged him quickly then turned back to the curious blonde, standing in Roy's doorway, with a troubled look on his face.