This is a sequel to Otters and Sherlock. By the way underlined words stand for texts between Sherlock and John. 'words' stands for thoughts. Enjoy! Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock BBC or Hamlet as there are Hamlet allusions.
Hedgehogs and Watson
Boring. So boring. Sherlock glanced around the messy flat; his gaze swept past books, experiments, human fingers, his violin, Watson's laptop, his otter…Wait…where was his otter? Internal panic rang through Sherlock Holmes' magnificent mind palace. Sherlock went flying through papers, dirty socks, through the kitchen, etc.
"Where is that – " Sherlock jumped up in realization. Of course! No one but Watson would play such a trick on him! Grabbing his phone Sherlock sent off a furious text.
SH: Give me my otter back.
J.W: Are you sure he hasn't run away?
SH: Oh for crying out loud! He's not stupid like Anderson!
JW: I don't quite get what stupidity has to do with running away.
SH: Of course there's a connection! Yorick is a smart otter. He knows not to run away or else he'll get caught and sent off to some zoo or aquarium where his brain will wither away from boredom or from those elementary tricks used by the aquarium to entertain people.
JW: That's great and all but I still have work. I'm turning my phone off.
SH: No, don't do that!
SH: JOHN! You did not…
SH: John, please tell me where my otter is.
Sherlock threw his phone onto his desk and ruffled his hair. 'Where in god's name is my otter?'
Meanwhile John laughed wickedly at an African pygmy hedgehog breeder's place. Contrary to what he had told Sherlock, John was in fact not at work and he did have Yorick who was creating quite a fuss. The woman had stared briefly at the otter before saying, "Well, I can't guarantee you finding a hedgehog okay with an otter but we can give it a shot."
Smiling, Watson replied, "Oh that's quite all right." Boy was Sherlock in for a nasty surprise. The women only had ten hedgehogs for sale. The first five were way too timid. The next three practically attacked Yorick and Yorick tried to bite them. The second to last didn't react at all. John sighed. There was one more to go. He shoved Yorick forward and Yorick sniffed at the hedgehog who "lightly" smacked some spikes at Yorick. Yorick huffed and showed some teeth and after quite some fussing they had both settled down and seemed grudgingly accepting of each other. Watson smiled. 'Perfect. Feisty enough to bother Yorick but content with having him around and he's a male. Wonder if I could beat Sherlock at breeding.'
"I'll buy this one," said John. The woman nodded satisfactorily and got all the papers out which John signed. Having bought a cage already, John picked up the little hedgehog and placed him in his new home. Walking out, John said quietly to himself: "I'm going to call you Horatio and we're going to have lots of fun with Yorick and Sherlock." Grinning, Watson whistled all the way home to 221B Baker Street.
Meanwhile, Sherlock was laying on the couch thinking about where his otter was. He could have just tried to find Watson but with his cell off, the GPS was useless, and he really didn't want to go on a chase around London for Watson. That was too childish. Suddenly the door opened up and John shuffled in carrying Yorick.
"Found him wandering the streets," said John with a smile.
"He's obviously been with you this whole time. His fur is not dirty enough to have been wandering the streets of London. Surely, someone would have noticed an otter roaming the streets of London and notified animal control unless they were just incredibly stupid. Why did you lie to me?"
"Well I had a surprise for you that involved Yorick. I'm sure you'll love it," said John.
"Oh, I'm so excited. Can't you see I'm bouncing in my seat?" asked Sherlock.
"Close your eyes," said John.
"If you're trying to turn me on don't you think having my eyes open would be much more effective?"
"Sherlock! Anyway, hold out your hands," muttered John, blushing a bit.
"I'm waiting," said Sherlock. Down plopped a painful ball spikes. "GET THIS THING OFF OF ME!" yelled Sherlock who proceeded to juggle a hedgehog around until John managed to scoop Horatio back while laughing.
"He's the new addition to the family. Sherlock meet Horatio. Horatio meet Sherlock" Horatio snorted a bit upon seeing Sherlock and Sherlock spluttered. "Did you see that? He just huffed at me. Me! I won't stand for any funny stuff in this flat. You tell him that John."
"On the contrary, I think you'll just have to deal with him," said John.
"You can't be serious John. I always control Yorick."
"Yes, like the time you had him fishing in my bathtub."
"He was very persuasive."
"And that time he used my laptop to crack open some clams."
"Well, there were no plates and no stones big enough. You weren't possibly expecting
me to go to the river and fish around for dirty old rocks now were you?"
John glared. "And don't forget that time you filled my tea leaf containers with clam
"Well that was entirely your fault. How could anyone be that tired in the morning as to fill their cup with clam chowder and not know it was clam chowder?"
"Well how can anyone be that tired that he can't find where his otter went until several hours later?"
Sherlock opened his mouth and then closed it. "All right I admit to being wrong in certain cases but do not leave me alone at night with that thing – "
"I'm sorry did you say something? Anyway Horatio needs to be bathed and since you never use your bathroom, I think I'll be borrowing it." John promptly walked off.
Sherlock stood there for a moment before running to his bathroom shouting, "Wait I have experiments in there!" Boy was Sherlock going to love Horatio.
That's the end of it guys! Reviews and criticisms welcome!