Tony/Loki, MPREG. My earlier fics Blue and Red And Green (should never be seen) were the first two parts of this series.

What's a former super villain to do when all his kids leave home?

Something Borrowed. Something...

"Will you please name this baby after me, Loki?" Thor had pleaded, when Loki announced he was pregnant for the 6th time. "Apart from Ástrior all your children have Midgard names. At the very least, can this child have a proud Aesir name?"

"I allow Tony to name our children," Loki replied, as he lay back on the couch, and placed his bare feet on two expensive green silk cushions. "I felt he should have some hand in this process, apart from his initial, disappointingly short involvement."

"Can I ask Tony if he will name the next child after me?" Thor asked, hardly able to contain his excitement.

Loki ran his hand thoughtfully over his stomach, nodded his head and said, "Yes, you can ask Tony, and if he agrees, then I will allow him to name the child after you."

"Thank you, brother! Thank you!" Thor boomed happily, and ran off to find Tony.


When Steven, their second child, had been born Loki had decided he would experience the joys of giving birth naturally. With his magic he could easily alter the alignment of his bones, and give himself a female pelvis that would allow the baby to pass through it.

After 6 hours of painful labor, and no sign that the baby was in any hurry to exit his body, Loki had laid in the bath and performed his own C section while Tony vomited into the toilet in the corner. He had never attempted a natural birth since, and this baby would be no different.

8 months after Thor had asked if the baby could be named after him, Loki lay in the bathtub, well practiced at the art of delivering his own children now, and used a knife to cut open his belly, while Tony hid his face behind a towel. He whispered incantations to dull the pain and stem as much of the blood flow as he could, but it was still too much of a grisly sight for Tony to take.

"Hold this," Loki said, and Tony reached blindly, with his eyes still covered, as Loki handed him the knife. Tony dropped it in the sink then groaned, feeling bile rise up his throat, as he saw the blood dripping off his fingertips.

There was a slight wet, sucking sound and Loki said, "Hand me the cloth."

Tony passed Loki the towel, and accidentally looked at the gaping hole in his stomach and the puddle of blood he was laid in and lost it completely. He opened the toilet lid, and puked out the contents of his stomach.

"Oh good heavens, Tony," Loki said, as he wrapped the crying baby in the towel, gently wiping it's skin to clean it. "You should be used to this by now."

"I'm sorry," Tony said. "I will never get used to this part."

"Well if you don't mind, I'd really appreciate it if you could hold your child while I heal myself," Loki snapped. "I have no wish to die in a bathtub simply because you can't stand the sight of a little blood."

Tony reached for the baby, and cradled it gently in his arms, as Loki healed the wound in his side, shape shifted his internal organs back to normal, then cleaned the blood from the bath with magic.

"She's a girl," Tony said, as the towel fell open.

"Yes," Loki said. "She's a very beautiful girl."

"I thought we were having a boy?"

"I never said we were having a boy."

"But you said told Thor we would name the baby after him."

"Oh…" Loki said, with a huge self-satisfied smirk on his face. "So I did."

"You knew she was a girl all along?"

"Of course."

"So you waited 8 months for the pay off to a prank?"

"Indeed I did," Loki replied.

Tony couldn't keep the huge grin off his face, and said, "I love you."

"Come," Loki said, as he rose to his feet and clambered out of the bath, "We must introduce Thora to her uncle."

"He's gonna be pissed."

"Good," Loki replied.

Years pass quickly when you are technically immortal, even Tony had come under scrutiny from the gossip press, and had been stopped outside a film premiere one evening. Tony had laughed when he watched a repeat on E! Channel the next morning.

"And here we have Tony Stark and his partner, former super villain turned planet saving super hero, Loki. Tony can I ask who are you wearing?" the presenter had asked.

"Of course Ryan, I'm wearing a delightful little number by Armani tonight."

"And Loki, I love your outfit, who made that?"

"It was custom made for me the finest tailor in all the nine realms, The Haus Of Asgard," Loki replied, giving a small half turn to display the intricate corset lacing on the back of his black and green leather tunic.

"They are gaining quite the reputation after designing the costumes for Lady Gaga's Super Bowl half time show, last month," Ryan replied.

"Indeed they are," Loki said.

"Now Tony, I've been told by Giuliana that I have to ask you how you keep your skin looking so wonderful? It's like you haven't aged a day in the last 20 years."

"Apples," Tony replied, and Loki smirked behind him. "Lots and lots of Apples."

"Thanks for talking to us, guys. Enjoy the film," Ryan said, and then turned back to the camera. "You heard it here first! Apples are the secret to eternal youth. It's probably all the vitamin C"


Loki had realized that one of the perils of raising children who were basically demigod geniuses, was that they all grew up so fast and spread their wings far too early. One by one they all left home, with Thora being the last, accepted in Harvard at just 15 years old, which left them with a 7 bedroomed house with two people rattling round inside it, and Loki feeling curiously abandoned.

Tony had called it 'Empty nest syndrome' and Loki had found himself ridiculously bored most days since his children had left. He had attempted to develop a hobby, searching for something to fill his days while Tony was off playing his ludicrous game of superheroes.

Loki tried attending cookery classes, but he found them particularly pointless since he had no one but Tony to cook for, and his favourite foods were scotch and donuts.

He tried gaming and discovered that he hated World Of Warcraft with a deep passion, but he didn't mind the newly released Dragon Age 12 simply because he could make the male characters have extremely explicit sex. Even that got boring after he played it all the way through 3 times.

He tried knitting, but found all he wanted to knit was tiny baby booties, and briefly considered getting Tony extra drunk one night so he could get pregnant again, but decided it wasn't a very good idea, and eventually he settled on amateur dramatics as a way to fill the hole in his life.

He thought he would be able to tackle some of Shakespeare's more meaty roles, thinking he would make an excellent Henry, but instead found himself cast as the evil wizard in a children's pantomime. That hobby had come to an abrupt end when out of sheer force of habit, he had accidentally blasted the hero with a bolt of magic during the rehearsal of a climatic fight scene and sent him flying from the stage.


Loki had been idly scanning the newspaper for the second time that day when he spotted an advert that caught his attention. A local day-care facility needed an assistant, someone who would take care of the children, prepare their lunch, and read them stories, and he knew he wanted that job. The only problem was that he was a former super villain who wasn't even human, and he doubted that would go down well with the school board.

He teleported himself to two other day-care facilities, used his magic to hack into their computers, and created himself glowing work histories, then broke into the local department of education and created a top notch high school and college career.

"Why are we getting mail addressed to a Lacey Stark?" Tony had asked one morning.

"That is mine!" Loki snapped, grabbing the envelopes from Tony's hand. "It is none of your business."

"If you are planning something I think it might be my business," Tony said. "Please tell me you aren't turning evil again."

"Don't be ridiculous," Loki said, as he tore open the envelopes and looked at the high school transcripts. "I merely wanted to apply for a job, and doubted I would get it if they knew who I was."

"You want a job? Why didn't you say? You know the avengers-"

"As if I'd want to work for you," Loki hissed, interrupting him.

"You seem to be happy under me most of the time," Tony said with a grin, and Loki rolled his eyes in response. "What's the job?"

"I am applying to be a day care assistant," Loki mumbled.

"A what?"

"A DAY CARE ASSISTANT!" he shouted.

"Oh wow, that's great," Tony said, and Loki looked at him, stunned. "I can totally see you doing that. You'd be great at it."

"You are not angry with me?"

"Why would I be? I know you've been bored since Thora left home. I think this would be perfect for you," Tony replied. "Just don't go teaching the kids how to set anything on fire though, OK?"

Loki snorted in response and went back to reading his transcripts.

Loki had shape shifted into Lacey for his interview. She was a buxom, but demure woman in glasses with her black hair tied up into a neat ponytail. She was like one of those girls in a Hollywood rom-com who was the supposedly ugly lead actress, but you could see she was destined for a make over, and would wow the male star when she walked down the stairs in her prom dress.

He had impressed the principal of the school with his kind nature and thoughts on early education, and had been given the job on the spot. Lacey Stark worked 5 mornings a week, spending her time reading stories, encouraging the children to learn, and teaching them basic principals of quantum theory when no one was watching. Loki was happier than he had been in a long time, and when Loki was happy, Tony was happy, but mostly because he got elbowed in the ribs slightly less.

"Are you sure my DNA is in any of these kids?" Tony asked as he looked round the large table and noted that not only were all his children already taller than him, but every one of them had the same green eyes, raven hair and fine boned features of their other father.

"If I could reproduce without your help, Stark, we would need a significantly larger dining table," Loki replied, as he delicately cut his meat into small pieces before eating it, a habit he gained from years of cutting up food for his children.

Tony watched Elgr, Ástrior's 10ft tall Jotun boyfriend, who sat opposite him at the other end of the table on a reinforced chair, tucking into a turkey leg and said, "You know, if someone had told me 30 years ago that this would happen I would have called them crazy."

"I feel much the same way," Loki said as Thor laughed loudly through a mouth full of meat at something the Jotun had said.

After dessert Ástrior proposed a toast to family and everyone cheerfully joined her.

Thor looked at Loki with misty eyes as he raised his glass and boomed "To family!" and Loki glowered at him, but then noticed the odd bloom of happiness somewhere in his chest. A feeling that was interrupted when Tony grabbed Loki round the waist, pulled him into a hug, and kissed the side of his head.

"Stop being rough with me," Loki said, as he half-heartedly tried to push Tony away. "You know I do not like to be manhandled in public."

Then Loki settled into the embrace, and smiled as Tony planted a kiss on the corner of his mouth, knocked their glasses together and said, "To family."

"Gross!" Thora said, and stuck her finger in her mouth and made pukey sounds.

"Don't be rude," Loki chided, as he sat back in his chair, then he glanced at his brother, "I have no idea where you get your manners from."

"Soooo…" Ástrior said, "I suppose you are all wondering why I wanted this little get together?"

"I'd prefer to call it a soirée, but do carry on," Tony said.

"Elgr and I have an announcement to make," she said, and then shouted, "We're getting married!"

Tony noted the momentary look that crossed Loki's face before he burst into a smile and congratulated the happy couple, but he couldn't decide if it was shock or disappointment. They had both known one day their kids would get married, but no one had ever been deemed good enough for their little girl and Loki and Tony had taken it in turns to scare away Ástrior's unsuitable suitors.

Tony had particularly enjoyed the time Loki had appeared outside one boyfriend's house in his full armor and cackled while he burnt down a large fir free. They had run straight to their bedroom afterwards, and Tony had told him to keep the helmet on. When the police turned up they had the perfect alibi as an entire theatre full of people had seen Tony sat with one of Loki's clones all night, watching a particularly awful play, which Tony suspected Loki had picked on purpose just to annoy him.

It was finally happening, their little girl was getting married, and she was marrying a Frost Giant.


"Why on earth do you insist on wearing that ugly nightdress to bed?" Tony asked as he ran his hand up Loki's thigh and under his long sleeved, knee length, white cotton gown. "It's like the least sexy thing I've ever seen. It looks like something my grandma would wear."

"It's a nightshirt, not a night dress!" Loki replied, "And my comfort is far more important that what you find sexy."

Tony listened to Loki's dramatic, heaving sigh, and then said, "Come on, spill it."


"I know you're upset," Tony replied. "It's Ástrior's news, right?"

"I'm not upset. I'm very happy for her. Finding someone to love is very important and I'm glad she has," Loki replied stiffly.

"And I see the god of lies is a little out of practise," Tony said, "You can't fool me. Are you unhappy she's marrying a Jotun?"

"Fie upon thee for suggesting such a thing!" Loki snapped, then he sighed and rolled onto his back, "But she will have live on Jotunheim. Elgr would be unable to live on Midgard and Ástrior cannot shape shift him for long. I will never see her."

"You would think Helblindi would be over it by now."

"Yes, I'm sure he can get over the murder of his father just by snapping his fingers," Loki said, sarcastically. "Anyway, it's not Helblindi that is the main problem. If the people found out he were playing host to the kinslayer his position would be untenable. There would likely be a coup, he would lose control of his kingdom."

"Can't you just shape shift into a regular sized frost giant so no one would recognise you?"

"I could, yes. That's what we will probably have to do," Loki said, "But… I'm tired of hiding who I am. It's taken me a long time get even remotely comfortable with being a Jotun myself. I'm sick of living in denial."

"I like it when you say things like that," Tony said, taking Loki's hand in his and brushing his thumb over his bony knuckles. "It used to hurt me to see how much you hated yourself sometimes."

"Well, I could hardly hate myself for being Jotun anymore, it would mean I would have to hate my children too for being half Jotun," Loki sighed heavily again and said, "I suppose I always knew in my heart that they would be drawn towards Jotunheim."

"You didn't think they would stay here with us?"

"Why wouldn't they want to be on Jotunheim? In a place where they don't have to hide their true nature," Loki replied. "I think Helblindi knew that too, and they would be a valuable asset for him."

"In what way?"

"They are of royal blood and they have the ability to perform magic. Those traits are highly prized."

"So kinda like you then?" Tony said with a smile as he rubbed Loki's stomach.

"Well, they did not attempt to destroy Jotunheim or murder its king. I think there is a slight difference," Loki said mockingly. "But one day they, and their offspring, will be powerful enough to rebuild Jotunheim. They really will be able to restore it to its former glory."

"Remember that time you told me Odin had a plan to bring peace through you? Maybe it worked, but through our kids."

"It's possible."

"Maybe the old guys not so bad after all," Tony said, then when he saw the incredulous look on Loki's face he quickly added, "I mean apart from the whole lying to you and favoring Thor thing."

"Odin once made me tie one of my testicles to the beard of a Goat to make a giant laugh," Loki stated dryly.

"Oh," Tony replied. "What a bastard."

Tony arrived home early that evening after a quiet day of paper work in Stark Tower, hoping desperately that something would happen to break the boredom. Even Thor had excused himself before dinner and slunk off somewhere, which was very unlike him.

He walked into the kitchen and found Loki, running round, a recipe book propped up on the table, and several pots boiling on the hob.

"You know, you always look so serene and calm," Tony said, as Loki stopped and stared at him, his mouth opening and closing several times. "I always had this little idea in my head that everything in the kitchen was done by birds, squirrels, and bunnies, just like in Snow White."

Loki did nothing, seemingly unaware that a pan on the hob was boiling over, behind him.

"I guess you're like a duck," Tony continued as he moved over to where Loki stood, still silent, "All graceful on the surface and paddling like hell underneath."

He leant over to kiss Loki and felt a crackling sensation against his lips. He pulled back, then watched as Loki fizzled like static on a TV, and the clone shimmered out of existence.

"What the hell…" Tony said to himself, and then he shouted, "Loki?"

When there was no reply he walked through the silent house, looking for any sign of life, and then he heard thunder roll across the bay. He walked to the window, and saw grey storm clouds hovering in the middle of an otherwise clear blue sky with lightening crackling inside them.

He saw a figure emerge from the cloud, the unmistakable shape of Thor flying with Mjolnir in front of him, but something looked different, something was on his back. As Thor grew closer and flew back towards the house, Tony recognised that the thing on his back was Loki.

Tony had seen some strange things in the time he had spent living with Loki, and he really thought he had seen everything. He had quickly gotten used to coming home from a busy day at work, and finding that his family were practicing flying round the living room, all shape shifted into hawks. He hadn't even flinched the day he came home and found his kids feeding peanuts to a fully-grown bull African Elephant in the garden.

The sight of Loki riding round on Thors back, his legs tightly hooked round his waist, went straight to the top of his list of 'Weird shit that happens in my house', just beating out the time when Loki had created giant national landmarks as decoration for a garden party and then Tony had gotten a frantic phone call from Fury saying the Statue Of Liberty was missing.

Tony watched as they swooped majestically over the house, and he smiled when he realised he could hear Loki cackling with delight as they came in for a smooth landing.

"Well… That's certainly something you don't see every day," Tony said. "Although I don't know if I should feel slightly disturbed that you're riding round on your brothers back like he's a pony."

"Before I had mastered the art of teleportation, Thor would often carry me round on his back on our way to adventure," Loki said with a smile as he straightened his windswept hair.

"Yes," Thor boomed, slapping Loki on the back so hard he made him stumble. "It was good to relive old times, brother."

They headed back inside and sat in the living room, while a newly created clone finished preparing dinner, and discussed the plans for the following week.

"So you are definitely coming to the wedding?" Loki asked.

"I would not miss it for the world, brother."

"And mother and father?"

"They are also coming."

"And no one objects to… wearing a disguise?"

"It was a strange thought at first, I will admit that, but it will be worth it, for Ástrior," Thor replied.

"Good," Loki replied, finally leaning back in his chair, some of the tension draining from his body.

"Tell me, are all your children able to attend?"

"Yes, yes," Loki replied, "They have all been granted time off."

"What about Steven?" Thor asked. "I thought he was on the International Space Station. How will he get back?"

"He is," Tony replied, "But he said he would pretend to get locked in the toilet for an hour and teleport back."

On the day of the wedding Loki sat on a chair in his old room in the palace, and silently observed his reflection in a full-length mirror on the other side of the room. Asgard had not changed at all, even his own room remained just how he left it, cleaned and with the sheets changed regularly, although his books and personal possessions had long since been taken to Midgard.

He twirled his hair between his fingertips where it fell to his shoulders, and realised that just 50 years ago, a blink of the eye in terms of life on Asgard, he would have been mortified at the thought of letting his hair grow so long and unruly, but so much had happened in those years that it felt like a lifetime ago.

He heard Tony leave the bathroom behind him, then watched the reflection in the mirror as he padded across the floor to where Loki sat and snaked his arms around his chest from behind and rested his chin on Loki's shoulder.

"What are you doing?" Tony asked.

"Just observing," Loki replied, as he brought one hand up to Tony's arm. "Do you think I look older?"

"No," Tony replied.

"I look different."

"You look happier."

"Is that what it is?" Loki asked with a smile.

"Yup," Tony replied, raising his hand to point a finger, "That's what these wrinkles round your eyes are. They're from smiling so much."

"Oh stop it," Loki said, playfully batting Tony's arm.

Tony laughed and then said, "You do look different, but it's only because when you smile you really mean it now."

"Sometimes I wish I could go back and tell myself that everything will be all right one day," Loki said, leaning his head against Tony's cheek. "I was so very unhappy for such a long time when I lived here."

"If you did that though, we might never have met," Tony said, and Loki looked at him quizzically in the mirror. Tony explained, "If you were happy in Asgard because you knew things would get better maybe you wouldn't have gone crazy and tried to kill us all."

Loki laughed in response and said, "Yes, a thousand years of misery suddenly became worth it the day I got to throw you out of a window."

They stayed in silence for a moment and then Tony said, "Are you ready for this?"

"Yes," Loki replied, "I am."

"Are you sure?"

Loki nodded and extricated himself from Tony's arms. He stood up and moved to the center of the floor, and asked, "Are you ready for this?"

Tony nodded, and he watched as Loki closed his eyes and murmured a spell under his breath. There was a flash of light and when Tony opened his eyes again, Loki had been replaced by a 10ft tall Frost Giant.

"How do I look?" Loki asked, his voice sounding rougher and deeper.

"You look like yourself," Tony replied, truthfully, "Just a bit more… craggy."

Loki turned, stooping slightly so he could see his reflection in the mirror, and he was surprised to find that he could still recognise traces of his own features in this full sized Frost Giant form.

"If I hadn't been born a runt I never would have been abandoned in the temple to die," Loki said, as he touched his face. "I would have grown up, on Jotunheim, and this is what I would have looked like. We would never have met, and even if we did, you would never have loved me."

Tony looked up at Loki, and then beckoned him down. When Loki knelt on one knee so their faces were level, Tony raised his hands and gently cupped Loki's cheeks.

"I'll always love you, no matter what you look like," Tony said, and then he leaned forward and kissed Loki gently, then rested their foreheads together, and smiled.

"So are you gonna do me now?" Tony asked, excitedly. "I can't wait to see what it's like to be tall for once."

"Close your eyes," Loki said. "It will help with the disorientation."

Tony felt a prickling sensation crawl through his limbs, and then hit him like a wave crashing against a boat, as his world suddenly went off kilter. He felt like there was ice water flowing through his veins, but the room was too hot and then Loki said, "It is done."

He opened his eyes, looked at Loki and said, "Why am I still shorter than you?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Loki replied. "Should I rustle you up some high heels, like those you wear at home?"

"I don't wear high heels, they're CUBAN heels, and there's a big difference."

"Since when were Cuban heels 3 inches high?" Loki snorted, then he looked Tony up and down, appraising his handiwork, and nodded. "Yes, this will do."

"You know…" Tony said, "We still have ten minutes before we have to leave. That's ample time for a quickie."

Loki raised an eyebrow and said, "In this form?"

"I can't help it," Tony replied, "You just look too damn sexy in a loin cloth."

"You do realise one of us had to be the mother of the bride," Loki said, "And that person isn't me."

"Oh, this just got interesting," Tony replied, with a grin.

Helblindi was waiting when they arrived in Jotunheim, and Odin, Frigga and Thor each stood beside one of Loki's children who helped them maintain their Frost Giant shape shift.

"Greetings, Helblindi," Odin said, as he extended a grey hand out towards the Jotun. "I thank you for your hospitality on this auspicious day."

"All-Father," Helblindi said, as he eyed the king suspiciously, then shook his hand. "You are looking… well."

Helblindi turned to Loki and said, "May I have a word with you?"

"Of course," Loki replied.

"In private."

Loki nodded, then noticed the slightly worried look on Tony's face, and patted him on the shoulder, before he moved away from the group with Helblindi.

"Thank you for allowing me to attend to today," Loki said when they were far enough away from the rest of the group, "I know it must be difficult for you."

"Loki," Helblindi said, "I will never be able to forgive you for murdering my… our father, and I will never be able to regard you as my brother."

"I understand that," Loki said.

"You may be my blood, but you can never be my family," Helblindi said, and Loki felt a slight prickle of sadness at his words, "But I wanted you to know that I will never allow anyone to hurt your children because of who their father is. I am eternally grateful for the life they have brought to the palace. They will always have a place here if they wish it, and I would die to protect them as if they were my own."

"Thank you," Loki replied, feeling his breath hitch in his chest. "I raised them to know that they are Jotun and that it is not something to be feared or ashamed of. I am thankful that they are so accepted, here, where they belong."

"It is a great shame that no one could do that for you," Helblindi said, "Maybe things would be different now."

"If things were different, they would not be here," Loki said, "I regret what I did, but I would not change it."

"I understand," Helblindi said.

Loki nodded slightly, then turned to walk back to Tony.

"My father mourned your loss," Helblindi said, and Loki stopped in his tracks, turning his head slightly. "He often spoke of his first born who was too small to survive in the snow. He would have been proud of his grandchildren. He would have loved them dearly."

Loki turned back towards the group, rocking his feet up and down in the snow for a moment, turning over Helblindi's words in his mind, and then he walked back quickly and took hold of Tony's hand.

"You OK?" Tony asked, noticing how Loki's eyes were bright with tears, and he nodded in response, as he let out a shuddering breath.

They walked to the area where the ceremony was to be performed, a large flat plain of ice, where Elgr and his family waited for his bride.


"Hold my hand," Loki said as they moved forward for the Kirkja ceremony. It was the responsibility of the parents of the bride to summon forth ice and create a structure for the marriage to take place in. The larger and more intricate the structure they could create, the more respected and honoured the newly joined couple would be in Jotun society.

They held hands and moved forward, knelt on the ground, and placed their free hands into the snow. Tony felt a crawling sensation move through his chest as Loki's magic flowed through his body and moved out through his hand, and then ice spikes began to rise from the ground.

They were wide spikes that rose 100ft into the air, twisting together at the top to form a spiral, domed roof. Further spikes twisted from the ground to form magnificent glittering columns, each one engraved with sparkling designs, and runes for luck, good healthy, prosperity, and fertility.

The gathered crowd marveled at the Kirkja, the most splendid one ever created, and the sight of it glistening on the horizon drew gasps from even those Jotuns who were not attending. Everyone knew someone truly important, from a powerful family, was being joined today.

Loki staggered a little as he stood, worn out from creating the colossal ice chapel, and Tony caught his elbow. Loki flashed him a small smile of thanks, then took his place among the crowd.

The joining ceremony, performed by one of the temple priestesses, was informal and merry, with much laughter and stories told about the happy couple. Tony stepped forward and told the tale of Ástrior's first steps, and how she had fallen time and time again, but refused to stop until she had mastered it. Loki stepped forward and told the story of the first time Ástrior had summoned ice, but unfortunately summoned it on the chair Tony was already sitting on, which resulted in quite a nasty wound and Tony having to sit on a cushion for a week.

After the ceremony the guests created a table and benches from ice so everyone could sit and drink from barrels of mead that had been mysteriously gifted by the king of Asgard, a sign that couple were highly regarded, if even the All-Father was honoring their union.

"We could do this, you know," Tony said, slurring his words slightly, after one too many jugs of mead.

"What?" Loki asked. "Have a party?"

"No," Tony replied. "I mean we could get married."

"I'm surprised you would suggest such a thing after what happened last time," Loki replied, raising an eyebrow at the idea.


Tony and Loki had made just one attempt to get married in all the time they had been together. It involved a trip to Las Vegas, a penthouse suite at the priciest hotel in town, and copious amounts of alcohol.

"We wish to get married," Loki had announced as he carried Tony, over his shoulder, into the 24-hour wedding chapel, and then placed him leaning up against the desk. "This is the correct place?"

"I want the full Elvis package," Tony said, then banged his hand on the counter as he spoke. "Bring me your finest Elvis!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," the receptionist behind the desk said, "But gay marriage is still prohibited in this state."

Loki leaned his elbow on the desk, beckoned the woman forward, and slurred, "If it helps, I currently have a vagina. I'd like to point that I usually don't, and this is an unusual configuration for me, but I'm hoping to get pregnant again tonight."

The woman scowled at him and said, "I'm going to have to ask you to leave now, sir."

"I'm perfectly willing to show you, if you require proof," Loki said, and started pulling at the laces of his breeches.

"Michael!" The woman shouted, "Call the police!"

"There is no need to call for assistance," Loki said, stepping back from the desk. "Why, I have one of the Avengers, Earth's mightiest heroes, right here beside me. I'm sure he is perfectly capable of removing me from the building."

"Yes!" Tony shouted. "Get out, villain! Begone from this place and stop harassing this poor woman who clearly needs to remove the stick from her ass."

Loki dissolved into a fit of giggles as Tony raised his hands, as if firing his repulsors, and went, "Pew-Pew-Pew."

"Oh no!" Loki shrieked, "I have been shot by the mighty Iron Man! How will I ever survive?"

He staggered backwards a few steps as he laughed, then backed into a small table that held a vase of flowers, and knocked it over. He quickly righted the table, picked up the vase and placed it back where it belonged.

"Good as new," Loki said with a smile, then his expression turned to horror as the flowers set on fire, and he said, "Oops."

"You're evil!" the receptionist shouted.

"Thank you for the compliment," Loki replied, and Tony pushed him out of the door.

The next morning Tony woke with a pounding headache and a terrible taste in his mouth. He rubbed at his face and groaned as he peeled his eyelids opened.

The room looked like it had been hit by a tornado during the night. The paintings were ripped from the walls, the TV screen fizzed with static, and Loki was passed out, face down on the floor, next to a vomit filled top hat.

There was a gentle cooing sound from the other side of the room, and Tony sat up. A flock of pigeons stood on the back of the couch, watching him impassively with small beady black eyes, and then he looked down at himself. He was wearing a wedding dress and sporting a rather impressive pair of breasts. He quickly slid his hand across his crotch and breathed a sigh of relief when he found the rest of his body was how he left it.

"What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas," Tony said later, as he sat on the edge of the bathtub, holding Loki's hair back while he leaned over the toilet, alternating between crying and vomiting.

"I promise I'll change you back… I promise I will," Loki said, between heaves, "When I remember how."

They never mentioned getting married again, until now.


"This all turned out OK, didn't it?" Tony asked.

"Indeed it did," Loki replied as he watched Ástrior talk to Elgr's mother, her face glowing with utter contentment, and he thought she had never looked more beautiful.

"I know you were worried about today," Tony said as he placed his hand on top of Loki's. "Are you happy now?"

Loki tore his eyes away from their daughter, looked at Tony with a bright smile and said, "Infinitely."

"Good," Tony replied, "When you're happy, I'm happy."


After the party they used the bifrost to travel back to Asgard and once again Loki found himself back in his own room, but feeling considerably happier than he had earlier in the day.

"Give me your hands," he said to Tony, who was swaying gently in the center of the room.

"Give me a kiss first," he said, and Loki eyed him disapprovingly, then gave him a peck on the lips.

Tony held his hands out and Loki took them in his. They closed their eyes as Loki said the spell to turn them both back to their regular forms, and when Tony opened his eyes he saw Loki's shocked face about 3 feet below him.

"Why am I still tall?" Tony asked, and then he noticed he still had grey, Frost Giant hands. "Why haven't I changed back?"

Loki held out his hand and hovered it over Tony's belly for a second, then his eyebrows shot up and he said, "Oh dear."


(I did say this was the last part of this series, but there is a possibility there may be another part still to come, although I will warn in advance, the idea I had is horrifically miserable and depressing :-s)