Standing in front of a startlingly pink mansion of a school, Lord Harry James Potter-Black wondered how he even got roped into his current situation.

Things after the war ended had gone startlingly well. By a thirty-minute unanimous vote by the Wizenmagot, Arthur Weasley became the new Minister of Magic, much to his surprise. After overcoming his shock (both at his new post and at the idea of his vault not being completely empty for once), good ol' Arthur immediately started changing the bureaucratic ways of the Ministry- the first bill he signed was one designed to integrate muggle aspects into the magical society. With the help of Hermione and several other proactive (and somewhat in-your-face) muggleborns, the policy quickly became a success.

Granted, the purebloods threw fits over the new policy. They complained that the policy was an outrage, a complete disregard for old wizarding traditions and history. Their concerns were noted, but quickly tossed aside. After the war, many politicians were understandably hesitant to back the purebloods. The current political fad is to be as light and un-pureblood as possible. Well, the purebloods that were left anyways- quite a large number of them fled for the Americas after the war ended. They knew better than to stay in England. Pretty much no one cared who was dark and who was light in the Americas.

Of course, Harry was right there in the political fray with Hermione and Arthur- he used his now celebrity status to endorse the policy. With Harry's political leverage pulling the policy in Arthur's favor, the purebloods could do nothing. For one, they lacked cohesiveness after a large number of their party left. That, and all three of the "Golden Trio" threw their influence behind the bill.

On the other hand, the Wizenmagot wisely kept their own mouths shut- they knew better than to go against the will of the majority (after the war, if Harry were to tell the magical population to go jump off cliffs, they would do so with bows, smiles, and sparkling eyes). Of course, by then several members regretted their decision to vote Arthur in that day. In their haste to rebuild magical London and regain status quo, they merely grabbed the closest un-Fudge like idiot willing to take the job. In hindsight, they thought, they could have picked someone more idiotic.

As for Harry himself, life went on as normal- dodging presses, avoiding fangirls and fanboys... the normal stuff. After the war, his obligation to the magical society was done. While magic became a fundamental part of who he was, he could do without magical society. He could do without their pettiness and their troubles.

Well, there was Ginny... but Ginny was another matter altogether. It took Harry a while to finally realize that life with Ginny might not be what he wanted. For one, he realized midway through attic cleanup one day that Ginny looked an awful lot like Lily. From then on, Harry became more hesitant in anything physical with Ginny. Things were moving way too quickly- he needed time to stop and think. Ginny of course, plowed right on. When his reluctance started showing, Ginny had pouted for a while, but then quickly turned her attentions to others. Well, she was a Gryffindor- not a Hufflepuff.

When a picture of Ginny snogging with another guy in a bar made the front page of The Daily Prophet, Harry was hardly surprised. Instead, the picture only proved to him that Ginny and he were never meant to be. Unsurprisingly, The Daily Prophet and The Witches Weekly blew the "scandal" way out of proportions. Headlines of him being "heartbroken" and "devastated" became commonplace. Unfortunately, Ginny's actions made Arthur's work all the more difficult, and Ginny herself was bombarded with howlers on a daily basis. It took Harry exactly two weeks and four days to become completely sick of both publications and all the drama attached to them.

On the morning of fifth day of the second week, Harry angrily apparated to Gringotts, magic blazing. Every living being automatically gave him a wide berth- his magic was saturating the air so heavily that it was rolling off of him in visible waves. Harry took two deep breaths (in a futile attempt to reign in his magic) and asked to see the best attorney money can hire, in the name of Potter and Black. Two hours later, a happy Harry Potter exited Gringotts with a stack of documents in hand. In the span of his visit, he had managed to instigate a lawsuit against both the Prophet and Witches Weekly for slander- not only for the recent "scandal", but also for all the hype in his fifth year. His attorney, a muggleborn by the name of Mr. Adams, assured him that the case was a shoe-in, especially since neither publication had "for entertainment purposes only" printed anywhere. Satisfied that the situation would be taken care of, Lord Potter-Black left the case in his attorney's capable hands.

The confrontation with Ginny herself had been a bit more than awkward. He apparated to the Burrow and found Ginny staring out the window in the kitchen. He let took a deep breath to gather his much touted Gryffindor courage and entered through the back door. Both Gryffindors stared at each other for a good minute or two.

"So we're over?" Ginny asked, her voice hoarse- from crying, he assumed.

"We're over." Harry affirmed before looking away.

"Where did we go wrong?" She asked in a whisper.

Harry had neither answers nor words to offer to her, not that anything he said would have made a difference at this point. He merely handed her the documents in his hands- documents that informed her of the lawsuit he was currently filing- and promptly walked out the door. Perhaps he was sorry for making her cry. Perhaps he was sorry for everything that had happened. Oddly enough, he wasn't even halfway heartbroken. Instead, he merely felt relief brought on by the end of his constant self-delusion.

Harry had then promptly holed himself up in the Room of Requirements one week later with none the wiser. His request to the room was quite simple: make time stop. He came to the room well prepared- he had with him all his worldly possessions and a crate of wit sharpening potion. While time paused outside the room, Harry utilized the opportunity to study on his A-level subjects. Yes, he had decided that he was done with the magical world. After all the stress, all the tears, all the pain, he was done. Perhaps someday he would be back, but until then, he would retreat to another world less painful.

It took every single drop of the wit sharpening potions (and then some), many headaches, and gallons of coffee for him to finally finish the last seven years of his muggle schooling. In his grueling mockery of a study session, Harry plowed through just about every subject he needed to know. Much to his delight, math was very much like Arithmecy, and he could relate personally to a number of Shakespearean plays. On the other hand, he had no idea that he had missed out on so much knowledge. While turning teacups to mice and back was all good, it did not teach him about biotechnology or genetics or physics or calculus. It was surprising how completely backwards the magical society was. No one knew of vaccines or gene therapy or surgery. It was always spells, spells, spells.

Throwing the last book (Advanced Calculus-Based Statistics Edition Two) into a pile behind him, Harry mentally rocked back on his heels in shock. He was downright surprised that the magical society had managed to last this long. Yes, they had their "equivalent" of muggle technology, their versions were much less precise, much less elegant, and nowhere near fail-proof. How many people a year had allergies to certain potions? How many people were killed each year because potion ingredients were grown in the wrong soil type? Or by mixing the wrong potions together? Overuseage of healing spells?

So maybe he wouldn't be back after all.

After thanking the Hogwarts house elves for their help during his "study session"- they had practically forced food and water down his throat, Harry stealthily slipped back out of Hogwarts through a secret passageway.

Harry then turned into a hermit of sorts in the Potter Ancestral Manor, a three floor mansion (with a basement, twelve bedrooms, a foyer, a huge kitchen, two living rooms, and a long dining room) with a number of gardens on its sprawling estate. In his "off" time, he threw himself into numerous side projects, such as wards to make magic and electricity coexist properly. His side projects were punctuated with the arrival of the occasional letter or newspaper. He replied politely, but curtly, to the letters that his friends sent him. Most had written about his breakup with Ginny- either out of concern, or in Ron's case, out of anger. He had written back saying that he needed time, and that yes, the relationship was over for good (he downright ignored Ron's rant).

When he wasn't replying to letters or doing research, he was busy picking out a major of choice and a university for next year. It was too late to take his A-levels by the time the war was over, and most institutions only took applications in the fall anyways. Oxford sounded pretty good. So did Cambridge. It took about a week of online browsing (he had managed to create the ward after many, many hours of research) for him to decide his majors: business, and accounting. He really did not need to find a career- he was already a multi-billionaire, not counting the investments and properties that he owned. What he really needed to focus on was maintaining his wealth and perhaps expanding upon it. Honestly, he didn't even need to do that since his great grand children would still be billionaires even if he died. But if he didn't find anything to do, he would be bored out of his mind in a day. Plus business isn't too horribly hard... right?

Right. It had taken a lot of fabrication, paperwork, and headaches, but by the next fall, Harry Potter was officially in the last year of a muggle secondary school, and had been in muggle schools all his life. To his surprise, he wasn't the first magical person to relocate to the muggle world, and there was a policy in place for such situations. Given that he needed everything to be hush-hush, he made the ministry employees swear oaths of secrecy. Extreme, but understandable given who he is. Nonetheless, he managed to hurry the paperwork through in time in time.

When fall finally rolled by, Harry applied to both Oxford and Cambridge for a double major in Management and Accounting. By spring, both universities offered him interviews (passed) and then conditional offers. By summer, he tested for his A-levels and managed to get seven A's and one B- good enough for both universities to accept him. After weighing his options, he chose Cambridge. Sometime in between his interview and A-levels test, Mr. Adams had contacted him back about the case- he had won, and both publications had to pay the court fees and fifteen million galleons. Each. Along with the official documents ending the case, Mr. Adams added the official apologies from both publications.

From then on, both the Prophet and Witches Weekly steered clear of the Boy-Who-Lived. Instead, both of them fired their chief editors and reporters (including a much offended Rita Skeeter) and stuck to actual events. No more celebrity-like stalking.

Thus ended Lord Harry James Potter-Black's life in the magical world.

Seven years later, the same man took the business world by surprise when he threw in massive funds into various investments- all of which paid off at least three fold. (Miraculously, Harry discovered that his trusty gut instincts were actually various forms of raw divination- the type that cannot be controlled through a medium such as tea leaves or stars.) Clearly, Harry had paid attention in class. It took him four years to complete his bachelors for Business and Accounting and another two years for a masters in Business.

Files were dragged up, phone calls were made, and soon, the name Lord Harry James Potter-Black became a household name. Much to his disdain, he became known as the newest most eligible bachelor. So much for escaping those pesky fangirls.

With the profits that he made from investing in the stock market, Harry wisely started a trading company for rare earth metals- something that is a rather sought out commodity. With the help of translation charms and more research, he had managed to secure a supplier in China. Money too, he supposed, smoothed the process somewhat. If there was one thing that business taught him, it was that business ethics is somewhat of a joke. Nonetheless, the trading company that he started was a success. Two years later, his trading company expanded to a global level and became wildly successful. More investments and a rather frugal lifestyle (well, as frugal as a multi-billionaire can get) meant that the zeros kept rolling in- something that his bankers were very, very grateful for.

It didn't take long for other companies to realize that the new competitor can neither be stopped nor sabotaged. So instead, they turned to negotiation. Various electronics companies from the United States and Japan began seeing him about increasing supplies for the precious metals. They realized first hand just exactly how Slytherin Harry could be. Soon, it became known that Harry, when it came down to negotiating, was a rather shrewd, but clever, businessman. Still, he made new connections through the interactions- and connections went a long, long way.

Still, it didn't really stop him from being bored after a while. He was constantly chasing after zeros with no end in sight. It had taken him a while, but eventually he realized that there was no point to any of this. He became successful, he had a company, he had everything that he could have wished for a long time ago. There really wasn't anything that he didn't have, except for happiness. Was he happy? How could he not be? Surely he was happier than the orphans in Africa. He had a roof over his head- several in fact. So then why wasn't he happy? He wasn't unhappy. At that time, he shrugged it off and merely returned to signing stacks of paperwork, but the thought nagged at him relentlessly.

He had made a name for himself- not for something that he did as a baby, but through sheer hard work and effort. He was recognized for his efforts, not merely his name. That was all he had wanted back when he was in Hogwarts, so why wasn't he happy? The majority of his muggle fans knew nothing of his "heroic deeds". So then why wasn't he happy?

It took a while, but one year later, he shocked the business world again by stepping down as the CEO of his trading company. Instead, he appointed a capable genius that he had discovered during a trip to Japan (a Mr. Light Yagami) in his stead. He met the boy a several months ago at Tokyo University- he was a guest speaker for a business class, and he spotted Light looking incredibly interested- perhaps a bit too interested. Creepy as it was- he had be fervently praying that the boy wasn't one of those rabid fans- the sharpness of in Light's eyes reminded him a great deal of his own. After the lecture, he caught up to Light and treated him to lunch at a high end restaurant in Tokyo. To his joy, he discovered that he had somewhat of a business genius on his hands, that is, even without looking up the rest of Light's school records. Light of course, was a Slytherin through and through (Harry supposed he was rather like a sane Tom Riddle). Still though, when it came to Slytherin, no one can out-Slytherin Slytherin's very own heir. Not even the Tom Riddle look-alike.

Business had changed Harry James Potter-Black a great deal. For one, he was now predominately Slytherin. But then again, time tends to change people.

Harry knew that he would have to be very, very careful with Light, but Light was just sheer untapped potential, and he would be a fool to let talent of that caliber escape his grasps. He had later learned that Light was a scholarship student- in To-Oh with a full-tuition scholarship. Interesting. Meanwhile, Light knew that Harry would be a very dangerous opponent when angered, but he was still a very important connection to keep. Thus, when Harry offered Light an internship at his company over afternoon tea, Light accepted- after a very long staring contest, that was.

It was the start of a beautiful "friendship"- of the Slytherin kind.

And that, was really how he met his successor. Granted, he kept the majority of his company's stock, so he still had a rather large say in how things are run, but he trusted that Light would not run his company into the ground. After all, they understood each other perfectly well. If the company died, then what would challenge Light anymore? There was no need for Light to create a company of his own when he had connections, funds, and a capable base all handed to him. Given that Harry still had a great many zeros left in his bank account, he took up investing again, trusting his instincts to tell him which stocks to invest in, and which ones not to. Investing did not take up as much of his time as running a company full time, so Harry was able to kick back and relax a bit in the Bahamas.

Not long afterwards, he took up his magic again, out of boredom. That, and golf. Oddly enough, the magical world still knows him as an eccentric hermit ten years later. He has had a couple of muggleborn contact him over the years, mostly out of admiration (he ignored them), but the magical world gave a collective flinch after his lawsuit- Harry Potter was serious. Don't anger the savior- even if it meant staying away from him. Of course, the rest of his friends, especially Ron, had been rather happy to take up him mantle as "saviors" of the Wizarding World (they still sent him letters- he just stopped replying to them once he started up his own business). Harry just shrugged. Let them. The only contact he really had with the magical world was ingredients and books. Everything else his team of trusty house elves (headed by a mildly aging Dobby) handled.

Golf was another matter entirely. He never understood what made golf so appealing, so in his curiosity, he tried. To his surprise, golf wasn't quite that bad. It took a lot of precision and luck to succeed in golf- it had taken him a couple of months to graduate from newbie to decent. Plus, he got to build connections while he played golf- connections were important no matter what.

And it was the same connections that he build up that would bring him to a perfectly pink school in Japan.

It had started out pretty normal one day at a golf course in France- he was playing golf with the other geezers like normal. And then that darn Yuzuru Suoh started talking a mile a minute. At first, he thought nothing of it- the man was a talker, and he was rather proficient at the long lost art of tuning people out. He really didn't know much of him, only that he had a son and ran a school in Japan.

"... and I can't find a teacher for the new business course that's in the second years' curriculum" Suoh said, pretty much oblivious to the fact that Harry was paying more attention to his golf ball than he was to him.

"Mhm."Hmmm... to aim high, or to aim low- that was the question.

"The old teacher skipped out on me last second, and now I can't find anyone. I can't just find any old teacher- I only want the best for my students. Most business teachers just lack the personal experience that I'm looking for." The man babbled on.

"Mhm." High- definitely high.

"You're retired, right?" Suoh asked, suddenly struck by an idea.


"Great! So you'll take the job?"

"Mhm- wait. What?" Harry asked, finally paying attention to what was going on.

"Great! School starts on the fourth of August. Be there at this address" Suoh scribbled down an address in Japanese "One week before school starts, and we'll talk about your living arrangements, pay, benefits, and the like." The headmaster handed him the piece of paper with an enthusiastic smile. Harry could have sworn he saw hearts spontaneously appear around the man.

"Wait- I don't-" Harry began.

Unfortunately, the elder Suoh's phone just happened to right at that minute. With a practiced gesture, he excused himself to take the call. Two minutes later, the man was back and looked to be in a hurry.

"I'm sorry, but I've got to go. It seems like my son got himself into another situation at the school. Have a nice vacation- I'll see you on the twenty-eighth of July!" The normally composed Suoh hurriedly threw everything into a pile and drove off on his golf cart as if the devil himself was on his heels.

Needless to say, since he left Harry in the dust, he never heard what the young multi-billionaire was going to say. After staring at the empty spot where that insufferable man once was for a good minute, Harry sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. How did he get himself into situations like this? Really, the amount of trouble he attracts is ridiculous. He knew that he was a living, breathing statistical anomaly, but this was just plain weird.

Well, I did say that I was bored. Harry mused. He wondered how Light was handling his company- last heard, the boy genius was investing in renewable energy sources. With half an army of engineers and architects, the company was churning out patents like nothing else. Much like himself, Light was talking the business world by the storm- quite literally kicking it off its axis. Though he supposed that it was good that Light steered clear of Europe (well, Greece) in general.

With a sigh, Harry gathered his golf equipment and got onto his golf cart- he had preparations to take care of if he was to move to Japan in two months.

Now standing in front of an Ouran Academy, Harry wondered if he should have avoided golf in the first place. Surely he wasn't cut out to be a teacher at the ripe old age of twenty eight. Well then, he mused, I guess I'll be stuck teaching rich brats for a year. It can't be that bad- at least the Weasley twins aren't enrolled in the school.

Famous last words, Harry James Potter-Black. Famous last words.

AN: I know, I know. I did say multiple times that I wasn't going to write anything but oneshots and twoshots, but this plot bunny just refused to be abandoned. I'm also doing this to train myself to write more- for the most part, I have trouble writing more than five thousand words per chapter- this one is around four thousand two hundred. So I guess this story is one big practice piece to help me improve my writing. Also, For the most part, the story will follow the plot line of the anime (huzzah, so at least I'll have something to go on). The pairing will be cannon- Tamaki/Haruhi. I really don't usually write, but I looked through the fandom for HP/Ouran crossovers and decided that there just weren't enough good fanfics in there –shrug-. Also, I don't quite know what to name this fic, so until I find a better title, it stays as it is.

As for updates, I decided that since it's mildly annoying for readers to hound authors (and equally annoying for authors to get the messages), I might as well give an estimated next-update time.

Please note that I am a full time student taking some really annoying (hard) classes, so I won't be able to update once a month, let alone once a week. For the most part, I'll be able to relax some after I get news back from my first choice college, but that might not be until April or June (don't ask me which college or which country). I've decided that most of this story is going to be written sometime during the summer (I'm rewatching the anime then, along with Guilty Crown), so the next estimated update date is: the end of June.

If I still haven't updated by the end of June, then feel free to send me as many messages as you want hounding for the next chapter. Until then, I probably won't have time to write another chapter. I'm writing this on the last day of my spring break, so yeah.

Constructive criticism and reviews are welcomed.

Many thanks,


Last edited: 3/25/12