As Jayne drove towards her home in Sussex she couldn't help the tears that flowed freely from her eyes. It had never been this hard to leave Chris before, so why now?
You love him. The voice in her head said. It was as simple and as complicated as that.
It was like she had been hit with a tonne of bricks. Of course she knew she loved him, they had known each other for such a long time and he was such an amazing man. But the realisation that she loved him more than a friend, that she loved him more than a partner even loved him more than her husband was quite overwhelming.
Tonight was going to change many things.
Chris watched Jayne drive away and he could feel his heart breaking. He'd loved her for a long time, but spending the last couple of days with Jayne had made him realise just how much he loved and needed her.
Chris took a deep breath, and got in his car and drove back to the flat. He had a plan forming in his head and a smile on his face.
Jayne found herself back home sooner than she realised. She took her bags inside and the silence in the house was deafening. It didn't really feel like home anymore. Jayne made herself a quick cup of tea, turned the washing machine on and cleaned the kitchen. Anything to keep her hands busy.
Before long it was time to collect her two wonderful children from school.
There was nothing like seeing the smiling faces of your children running towards you. A smile of a child can wipe away all your worries.
Jayne hugged her children and helped them into her car. The short ride from there school to the house was energetic. Jessica and Kieron had missed there Mum and wanted to tell her absolutely everything they had done while she wasn't there.
Chris walked in to his quiet flat. His very quiet flat. It didn't surprise him that he missed having Jayne there, she was such a massive part of his live. He put his plan into action.
Phil was already home when Jayne returned with the children.
"Daddy Daddy Daddy, Mummy's home" Jessica said running to give her Dad a hug.
"I can see that sweetheart."
"Hey" Jayne said to Phil
"Hi" Phil said flatly "Why don't you go change out of your uniform while Mummy and I talk"
"Ok" Jessica said as her and Kieron ran upstairs.
"Yes please" Jayne replied.
"I think we need to talk, don't we?"
Jayne held the warm cup in her hands and looked across the table to her husband. A man she still loved. She would always love him in a way, but things between them had not been right for a while.
Jayne and Phil sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity. Both had so much to say yet didn't know where to start. The silence was interrupted by Jess and Kieron running back downstairs.
"Later" Phil said to Jayne.
Jayne nodded. At the moment they had the children to look after and they would always come first.
Chris had cleaned the flat and done the shopping. He'd bought Jayne's favourite tea, her favourite wine and the ingredients to make some of her favourite meals. He'd taken the pictures out of the wardrobe and hung a few on the walls.
Somehow he knew that Jayne was going to talk to Phil tonight. He also knew that things between them had changed forever.
Jayne really enjoyed spending the afternoon with her children. And know it was time to cook dinner. Jayne didn't get to cook that often but when she did she enjoyed it.
The last few hours of they day went far too quickly for Jayne. They ate the evening meal as a family, she bathed her two children, read them stories and put them to bed.
Phil poured them both a glass of wine as he and Jayne sat in the quiet living room.
"Its time for that talk"
Jayne drank half her glass of wine before she looked at Phil "I…I don't know were to start" Jayne said, her eyes began to fill with tears.
"I think I do. Things have changed between us Jayne, they've been changing for a while"
"I didn't mean them to"
"I do still love you Phil" Jayne said
"I know you do, it's just not enough anymore though. You love him more"
Jaynes' eyes widened. How did he know? She'd only just figured it out earlier that day.
Phil answered her unspoken question "It's obvious" he said smiling a sad sort of smile "it's been obvious from the day I met you both"
"It was never like that. We were never like that. We just skated together"
"'Was'? Jayne, has something happened now?"
Jayne looked at the glass in her hands. She didn't trust her voice enough to speak.
"Karen phoned" Phil said "she told be her and Chris broke up. That's when I knew."
Jayne hated this "I'm so sorry"
"It used to be enough that you came home to me, but since he came back into your life you're not here anymore"
"I'm here all the time"
"Not mentally your not"
There was silence. Jayne finished her wine
"I'm not angry" Phil said calmly. And he really wasn't. He had been expecting this conversation, had seen it coming for years.
"Why not? I think I would be"
"Jayne, you've know him much longer than you've known me. You two have been through a lot together. The reason you two have lasted is because you are soul mates"
Jayne wanted to say something, but the words wouldn't come.
"If I ask you something will you tell me the truth?" Phil asked.
"It's the least I can do"
"When did you start sleeping with him?"
Again Jayne was caught of guard, but she had promised the truth "This week. I didn't mean it to happen" The tears started to fall from her eyes "It was after my accident, it was the night Chris caught me"
In the chaos of the last couple of days Jayne had not told Phil about the incident. Jayne relayed the details of how Chris had caught her before she had hit the ice. "That night, I dreamt he didn't catch me, I dreamt I hit the ice. Chris was there to comfort me. And, things sort of, just, happened"
Phil hated to see Jayne cry. No matter what happened he still loved her. He reached over and held her hand.
"You should know better than anyone that Chris will always catch you"
"That's what he said"
"Then listen to him" Phil gave her hand a squeeze "more wine?"
As they drank the remainder of the bottle they talked liked they hadn't talked in years. They talked liked the two friends they used to be. Jayne still wasn't sure why Phil was being so nice about everything. He said all he wanted was Jaynes happiness and if Chris was what made Jayne happy then, so be it.
"I'll take the spare room tonight. You have the bed"
"I can't do that to you"
"Yes you can" Phil said "Can you take the children to school tomorrow? I need to leave early"
"I'd like that."
"You're going to stay with him in town now, aren't you?" Chris asked.
Jayne nodded "I think so. If that's ok?"
"I figured as much."
"I'll take the kids to school then head back to town"
"I'll see you at the studios"
"Oh" Jayne sank back in to the sofa "I'd not even thought about that. Is it going to be weird? Isn't it? We still have to work together."
"It'll be fine" Phil began "just do me one small favour"
"Could you and Chris keep thing professional when I'm around? What you do in private I really do not want to know about or see"
Phil stood up "I'm going to bed now, night Jayne"
"Good night Phil, and, thank you for being you"
Phil nodded and headed up the stairs.
Chris was getting ready to go to bed when his phone rang "hello?"
"Did I wake you?" a shake female voice asked
"Jayne? No not at all"
"Are you alright? What's happened? Did Phil…"
"No! Nothing like that, he was nice."
"Yes. He was really nice about…about everything. He wants me to be happy and you make me happy"
"You make me happy as well Jayne" Chris voice went sad "you're not coming back tonight, are you"
"Not tonight, but I'll bee there as soon as I've taken the kids to school tomorrow"
"I miss you Jaynie"
"I miss you too Chris" Jayne yawned
"Sounds like you need to get some sleep, we'll talk more tomorrow"
"Night Jayne, sweet dreams"
Jayne hung up the phone and headed to bed. So tried to me quiet so as not to wake the Children or Phil, but she could her Phil talking to someone. She didn't want to stop and listen but she couldn't help herself.
"Of course I'm not alright, but what can I do?...No, I will be the bigger man….No, Jayne doesn't know...hold on a second…"
Jayne moved towards the bathroom then, away from Phils door.
What could Phil have been talking about, and to whom? What secret was he hiding from her?
Jayne found it difficult to sleep that night. Her bed didn't feel right, knowing Phil was keeping a secret didn't sit well with her and she missed Chris. It both scared and excited her at just how much she missed Chris, she had never missed anymore as much as she missed Chris at that moment.
Jayne woke early that morning, after dressing she packed a small bag before setting about a few chores. She put the coffee machine on for Phil, made her self a pot of tea and made the kids their packed lunches.
"Morning mummy" Jess said as she ran into the kitchen
"Morning honey, what would you like for breakfast?"
"Chocolate!" Jess said enthusiastically.
"How about toast with chocolate spread?" Jayne asked
As Jess said down to breakfast Phil bought a sleep Kieran downstairs.
"Hey little man, do you want breakfast?" Jayne asked
Kieran just nodded.
"What about the same as Jess?"
Kieren looked at Jess and her chocolatey face "Chocolate!" Kieran said, feeling more awake knowing he was getting is favourite thing for breakfast.
"Morning" Phil said to Jayne as he poured a coffee
"Morning. I hope I didn't wake you when I came up last night?"
"Not at all, I was all ready asleep"
Jayne poured a herself a cup and tea and joined her family at the table.
"What are plans for the day?" She asked Phil across the table.
"The usual" Phil replied before sending a message on his phone.
Jayne could feel the tension in the air. Despite what Phil had told her the night before he clearly wasn't happy with the current situation, but who could blame him. The thing that hurt the most was that despite their heart-to-heart conversation, despite the fact that she had been honest with him he was still hiding something from her.
Chris woke to an empty flat. He didn't like it. He missed seeing Jayne asleep in his bed. It would be several hours before he saw Jayne again. Chris did the only thing he could think of, he went to the gym.
Phil put down his phone and looked directly at Jayne, "Will you be staying with Chris for a while?"
Jayne was a little shocked at the abruptness of his question, especially with the Children still around. Jayne knew she would have to explain to the children soon, just not this soon.
"Yes. I'll stay until after the show"
"Were will you go then?"
Jayne didn't know what to say, shed usually come home to her family while Chris went back to the States to see his.
"Mummy comes home" Jess said very matter of factly.
"Jess, Kieran, I have something I need to tell you" Jayne took a deep breath "I might not be here as much as I usually am. I'm going to be spending some time with Uncle Chris"
"Can we come too?" Kieran asked
"Not this time, soon maybe"
Phil stood up from the table "I need to get to work. I'll get the children to phone you tonight" and with that Phil walked off.
In his head Phil wasn't being rude, not really. He was doing his best to keep things polite for the children's sake. He had come to understand a long time ago that Jayne would be with Chris. He might have accepted it, but it didn't mean he had to like it. He would be as polite as he could and he would shake Chris hand when the time came. Besides he couldn't be that angry, not with what he was doing.
Jayne got her bag from upstairs and secured her children in the car. After a short goodbye to Phil she began the short drive to school.
"Mummy? Do you still love Daddy?" Jessica asked
The only way to answer questions like this is with the truth, "I will always love your Daddy, but, sometimes, Mummies and Daddies don't love together. That's why I'll be spending some time with Uncle Chris"
Jayne parked the car in the school car park. Before getting out the car she turned to face her two beautiful children "no matter what just remember I love you lots and lots and nothing will ever change that."
"Love you to Mummy" Kieran said.
Jayne, Kieran and Jessica walked hand in hand through the playground and waited for the bell to ring. Jessica and Kieran gave there mother a hug and ran to there class line.
Jayne watched as the pupils filed into the school. It was harder than normal to pull herself away, but the thought of seeing Chris in just a few short hours helped. As she fastened her seat belt she sent a quick text letting Phil know the kids were save at school and another telling Chris she was on her way.
Chris hadn't been back long when his phone beeped.
Just dropped kids at school, driving straight over, need a hug
As Chris saw who the message was from he smiled, but the content of the message made him sad. He hated it when Jayne was upset, he always had.
To start with if she was upset she didn't concentrate on her skating, then as they became closer he didn't like seeing his friend upset, once Chris realised he loved her, well, seeing the person you love hurt breaks your own heart. He knew that last night had been tough for Jayne so he would need to plan something special for tonight. And plan he did.