...ASDFGHJKL! If I've got all the time in the world to update this, why can't I freakin' update COWC?! WHY?!

Oh, and to the poor gentleman who requested smut from me in the last chapter, I must apologize. Afraid I'm not very good at that sort of thing, and don't intend to become so. I've been smut free for over 3 years now, and do not intend to go back. Afraid this story is as close as I dare to tread. All my sympathies to you though...

Title - Pillow Talk (pt. 4)

Prompt - Oh the horror... no, literally.

Parings - Mato/Yomi

Disclaimer – I don't own.

Mato lie in bed with a frustrated look. The lights were out, and everything was silent, and at one o' clock in the morning that was not an odd thing. Everyone should be asleep at that hour, and so should've Mato, or at least she wished she were. As it stood it looked like there was no sleeping that night, thanks to a certain heiress causing a fuss underneath the blanket. The raven haired girl sighed for the umpteenth time that night before lifting up the blanket and taking a curious peek at the girl hiding underneath, and clinging to her waist.



"Yomi? I'm pretty sure you can come out. Nothing's gonna come after you, I promise! ...I knew we shouldn't have watched those scary movies tonight."

"-whimper- You're the one who suggested them!"

"I was kidding, I didn't think you'd take me seriously! Normally, you ignore me when I bring those up. Besides, If you were so scared, why'd you make us watch the two sequels?!"

"T-the first movie was just so good, I had to know what happened n-next."

"-sigh- Yomi come from under the blanket, hiding under there wouldn't save you anyhow."

"If I can't see them, they can't see me."

"...That never works."

"I'm not coming out!"

"Yomi? I'd like to sleep, preferably sometime tonight."

"No! If I can't sleep, you shouldn't sleep either!"

"...Fine. You insist on staying down there? Entertain me."

"How would I do that?"

"Well lets see, you have that pretty pink tongue of yours, and you're practically at eye level with my hips... get creative."

Yomi immediately emerged from the blanket, with an embarrassed blush on her face.

"...You pervert!"

"Got you to come out didn't it? And just so you're not tempted to hide again-"

Mato quickly grabs the comforter with both hands and tosses it to the floor, leaving Yomi to curl into the fetus position and shiver out in the open darkness. With no where left to go, the heiress retreats underneath Mato's sleeping hoodie, and the raven haired girl squirms awkwardly as Yomi forces her head under the shirt.

"Wow... This is gonna be "The Ring" all over again for you, isn't it?"


"Yomi, what's it gonna take to get you to go to sleep?"

"Erase the last 6 hours from my brain."

"Yomi, it was just science fiction. Fiction! As in, nothing in them was real. You don't have to be scared! There's no magic made, killer dolls coming after you, I promise."

"It was so creepy!"

"It was special effects. None of those dolls actually exist. And if they do, they aren't actually alive like in the movie."

"How do you know?!"

"Because the entire camera crew would have died while they were filming! That's how!"



"...You know, I never bothered to see it that way."

"No one ever does."

"But I'm still not going to sleep!"

"Well I am. If something does come after you, wake me up and I'll shoot it with Rock's cannon for you, okay?"

"No, don't go to sleep! Don't leave me aloooooone!"

"This is actually kinda sad. Creator of Dead Master is terrified of some fake dolls on a TV screen. I'm finally starting to see why she constantly gives into the the temptation to pick on you... Not that I condone it."

"...She's laughing at me."

"I kinda want to laugh too, but I'm trying to be polite."


"So which is scarier then? Creepy killer dolls, possessed with dead souls? Or Dead Master, raiser of dead bones?"



"-sigh- The dolls."

"Really? Thought for sure you'd say Dead Master. She certainly the creepiest thing I've ever seen."

"Chariot is the creepiest thing she's ever seen."

"Crap, I forgot all about her."

"...Now, that I think about it... Kagari owns a LOT of dolls, doesn't she? ...OH GOD-"

"-STOP! Don't say another word! PLEASE!"

"...Tell me a story?"

"A story.. as in a bedtime story?"


"You're kidding. You're 14, why on earth do you want a bedtime story?"

"I need a distraction, one that keeps you awake!"

"Oh for the love of curry spice!"

"Please Mato?"

"-sigh- Only if you promise to come out from my shirt. You're stretching out the elastic.."

Yomi reluctantly leaves Mato shirt and settles for tightly clinging to her girlfriend's waist.

"Okay.. a story.. Once upon a time there lived a girl named Little Red Riding Hood."

"That story has a killer wolf in it! Pick something else!"

"...Once there were.. Three Little Pigs-"

"-That also has a wolf in it! Don't you know any others?"

"...Henny Penny was a very stupid chicken-"


"What? That story didn't have a wolf, it had a fox!"

"Same difference! Tell me a nice story, with a happy ending!"

"I can't think of anything this late at night!"

"So make something up."

"You expect me to work my brain at this late hour?!"

"Yeah, I know. I'm asking a lot from it. But do it for me, please?"

Yomi, feeling desperate gives Mato the best impression of a kicked kitten she can by looking at her with a sad expression and pouting her lips.

"Oh not the face!"




"You owe me for this... Once upon a time there was a king-"

"-I want it to be a queen!"

"...Queen then. And she ruled an entire kingdom-"


"-hiss- Queendom, all by herself."

"Was she rich?"

"Filthy stinkin'."

"Was she smart?"

"Genius level. -yawn-"

"Was she pretty?"

"Sure, very."

"...You say that so unenthusiastically."

"She was gorgeous Yomi, okay? Perfect! In fact she was the most beautiful woman who'd ever been born in over 100 years, and there would never be another like her for another 100!"

"Now you're just exaggerating."

"...Do you wanna tell this story? Or can I go to sleep now?"

"No, I'm sorry! I'll behave, I promise."

"Good! Okay, so she so was beautiful, but she was also very cruel! She was feared by her people.. -yawn- and hated by her palace staff."


"Because she kept them up at all hours of the night with ridiculous demands, like asking her loyal knight to tell her bed time stories at one in the morning."

"Well, he is her knight and all. Her happiness should be his happiness!"

"Pfft! As if! ...She really wants her knight to be happy? -smirk- She could try getting on her knees and putting her big mouth to real wor-Oww!"

"Keep telling the story. Why was she feared?"

"Ah.. She was feared, because once a month, she would pick a lady from the town she thought was prettier than her, and have the poor girl beheaded! Then she'd stick the head on pike, and ride through the open town-square on a float, with the severed head, and have the young virgin girls, who were uglier than her, boo and throw tomatoes at it."

"...This story doesn't sound very happy."

"I'm getting to that part. So... in spite of her hatred of women who were prettier than her, there had been one woman whom, although not as pretty as her, but came very close, she had not been tempted to have killed. Another queen from a neighboring kin- queendom, who'd she'd fallen in love with. So much so, that late one night she had her palace soldiers sneak into the other queendom, and kidnap the other queen."

"Poor girl."

"You're telling me. The evil queen then locked the kidnapped woman away in the farthest part of the palace, and use her to satisfy her own lust filled, sexual desires on a regular basis."

"And now you suddenly have Dead Master's attention."

"Great, tell her to pull up a seat and listen."

"Mato, why exactly does this story need to have sex in it?"

"What good story doesn't have a sex scene or three? Sex sells Yomi, common marketing practice."

"You plan on marketing this fairytale? I don't think you can sell this to kids."

"Are you kidding? Kids today are reading way worse than this! I can personally vouch for that!"

"...Never mind, continue."

"-yawn- Where was I? ...Right! The trapped woman was made the evil queen's new pet of sorts, and became quite miserable. It was no picnic for the evil queen's knight either, who, after waiting on the queen hand and foot for ages, still refused to notice his love for her and found a new thing to play with."

"This is a love triangle now?"

"I'm improvising! And it's a love square! The knight from the neighboring kingdo- queendom wanted his kidnapped queen returned. So both knights plotted to take out the others queen in cold blood, to get the woman they loved back."

"This story is so silly, I don't even know where to begin."

"Good. The sillier it is, the quicker you'll get to bed."

"I doubt it. Keep going."

"So, while the two knights prepared to stain their hands with royal blood, the two Queens got to know each other during their nightly romps. They talk, the have sex. The cry, they have sex. They laugh, they have sex. They eat-"

"-they have sex?"

"Bingo. And both were completely unaware of what their knights had planned. Kidnapped queen didn't want to admit she was actually falling for evil queen and that perhaps maybe all that time, the feared, evil queen was simply misunderstood, and lonely for true companionship."

"Like most self-made villains turn out to be."

"...You can relate, huh? So, evil queen started to regret kidnapping the other queen, but didn't want to set her free because she was afraid they would never see each other again. She spent hours, and days, pacing the floor, trying to make up her mind, until finally she couldn't take the guilt anymore. She planned to have one last good romp, confess her love, then release her captive. It's surprisingly on the very same night, both knights planned to takeout the two queens."

"Pfft! Soooo cliche!"

"Hush! So, the knight from the neighboring queendom, crept into the palace while the evil queen's knight sharpened his sword, to do the deed. Unfortunately, the two knights ran into each other on the way to the back room were the queens were, and end up fighting to the death for two women who did not even love them back."

"They both killed each other?!"


"What was even the point of including them in the story if that's how they end up?"

"No point. I'm just giving you exactly what you asked for, a made-up story at one in the morning! Now, let me end this?"


"The two queens emerged the next morning and found the bodies of their loyal knights, dead in front of the door. They burned the bodies, and mourned in each others arms for a bit, before deciding to combine their two queendoms into one, rather than going their separate ways. The got married, adopted 12 of their villages homeless kids, and everyone, more or less, lived happily ever after. The End!"

"Hmm.. I can see why you're always failing literature class now. That was terrible!"

"Are you kidding? That story was some of my best work! ...At least while its one in the morning."

"Okay, and what's the moral of this convoluted tale you've spun?"

"Why does it need to have a moral?"

"All fairytales have some sort of moral to them, don't they?"

"Oh I don't know... Um... "Who needs a man when we've got each other?"


"Feel better now?"

"Yes, thank you. Dead Master liked your story too. Especially the sex part."

"So glad she approves, now let me sleep!"

"Mato, one last thing before you go to bed?"

"What now?"

"Take me to the bathroom?"

"Why? You know where my bathroom is by now."

"It's dark out there!"

"I thought you weren't afraid anymore?!"

"I never said that, I just said I felt better. Come on! I'd do it for you!"

"Pfft! No you wouldn't! You'd happily throw me out the room and force me to fend for myself."

"That's not true at all! If it were you, I'd protect you from the dark! Or killer dolls, or a crazy knight who wants to kill you, or even zombies."

"Yomi... if we were running from a zombie invasion right now, you would trip me just for the 2 second chance to escape."

"Mato I'm very hurt you'd think that. I'd be more than happy to take the fall for you if zombies invaded!"


"Sure. If we're gonna turn into a flesh eaters.. I wanna be the one to bite you!"



"Yomi, I'm gonna go sleep on the couch. Don't follow me."

"Take me to the bathroom on your way there?"

"Fine... but you're making the return trip on your own."

A/N - Gonna go out on a limb and guess Yomi probably followed Mato to the couch anyway. Ah well.