The Marriage of Haruhi Suzumiya
Disclaimer: I do not own the Haruhi Suzumiya series or any of it's elements.
Chapter 1: Awakening
It had been a peaceful summer. No endless loops, no murder mysteries, no closed spaces and no SOS Brigade. Apparently the Brigade Leader, Haruhi Suzumiya, hadn't come up with any ideas for this summer vacation. I would get the occasional call from Haruhi or Koizumi. I might bump into Asahina and Tsuruya while the pair were shopping. I might have even agreed to take Nagato to library but the vacation was almost SOS Brigade free. I spent most of my summer lounging around and relaxing. The last time I talked to anyone in the Brigade was when Haruhi called me to complain that we did nothing this summer. So it looked like this vacation would be peaceful, I even finished my homework early. I was planning on sleeping in until late for the last day of my vacation.
I should have known that wouldn't happen. I woke up early feeling something warm and soft next to me. It was too big to be the cat. I find my hand on something soft and firm and as I give it a squeeze I hear a loud squeal.
Ouch? Now I can't say from experience but did the thing I just squeeze... uh... was that a-
"Ouch, Kyon. Just cause I let you touch them doesn't me I let you be so rough."
I pull my hand away as I open my eyes to find Haruhi not only next to me but in the same bed as me. A number of questions run through my head. Why is Haruhi in my bed? Wait this isn't my bed, whose bed are we in? Where am I? What's going on? Why hasn't Haruhi killed me yet for grabbing her-
"Uh..." Is all I can mutter.
"Come here." Haruhi pulls me towards her crushing her lips against mine. She pulls away flashing me her million watt smile. "If you're going to be frisky in the morning than be frisky in a morning we're not expecting company. I'll get breakfast ready and you can start by brushing your teeth."
She jumped out of bed and runs out.
I was left speechless. There were a lot of things I did not understand. I also hate to admit it but Haruhi was actually a good kisser. I can't help but be reminded of that time in the closed space. I finally shake it off enough to go the bathroom. I splash some water on my face hoping to wake myself up to find this has all been a dream. It doesn't work. I find my tooth brush and figure I might as well brush my teeth. Coming out of the bathroom I see Haruhi coming out of the room changed from the pajamas to find her in to some more casual clothes.
"Get changed I'l have breakfast ready in a few minutes." Haruhi tells me before heading back to what I assume is the kitchen.
I go back to the bedroom and I open up a random drawer. I find... I never thought I would say it but it's a drawer filled with Haruhi's panties. I quickly close the drawer and open up another one to find some of my clothes. I quickly change to something casual.
I hear some one knock at the front door.
"Kyon! Get the door!" Haruhi yells.
I make my way trying to get my bearings. I find that this is an apartment with awkwardly placed furniture and several large unopened moving boxes. Heading towards the door I have the ideas of running out of it as soon as its open. I do finally open it up to the find the other Brigade members looking worried, so I'm guessing running away is out of the question.
"Mikuru! Yuki! Koizumi!" Haruhi comes into the room to greet them. "I'll have breakfast ready soon. Just sit down and make yourselves at home."
She goes back to the kitchen and the second she is out of ear shot I ask, "What the hell is going on?"
They trade looks ultimately Koizumi is the one to answer. "You're married to Miss Su-" He pauses for a moment. "I'm sorry I forgot your last name. You and Haruhi are married." It's weird hearing him call her Haruhi and I don't appreciate that he's forgotten my last name.
Wait a second. "We're married?"
"Yes, it appears that you're new wife has altered the world."
"So that I'm married her? How that possible? We're not even the legal age."
"Haruhi has made small changes to the world. One of the changes is that the legal age for marriage has been lowered. My associates have assured me that you two are legally married. As far as I can tell everyones memories have been altered to fit this change. It appears the changes have taken place late last night even my associates seem to have been affected it would seem only ourselves are aware of the changes since our proximity to the source." He's clearly not calling her by her name since he can't remember her last name which is mine.
"Why would Haruhi do this?"
"I believe she was fantasizing and much like the making of the movie she has began to mix up the two."
"Why would Haruhi fantasize about me?"
They trade looks confused. "You can't be this oblivious." Koizumi mutters the smug bastard. "You are? I had just thought you were too proud to acknowledge it."
"What are you talking about?"
"She's been in love with you for a long time. Possibly since you've met. I would have thought it would have been obvious. You were the only person she took into that closed space when she was reforming the world. She created that space when you seemed to be getting too close to another girl. She trusts you above all others. She trusts you and opens up only to you. You're the only one that she remotely listens to. You're the only one that can convince her to change her mind. She cares about you more than anyone else."
Even Asahina is looking at me with surprise as if I should have known this the whole time.
"How do we undo this?" I ask them.
"I don't know." Koizumi replies. "I would suggest you go along with it for the moment. If something were to snap the fantasy for her it might result in reality itself snapping."
"It would be bad." Asahina says scared. "It m-might cause more Classified Information."
Finally Nagato says, "It would not be recommend for you to reveal the true reality. The Data Overmind believes that such actions would result in complete change of the world if not the Universe."
So no divorce and I'm married until we can figure a way out of this. Haruhi made breakfast for all of us. Over breakfast she fills in the Brigade. Sh tells them that me and her got married a little less than a month ago and went to have a romantic island honey moon. As for the apartment its a gift from our parents, they pay for it and we get to live together but they only pay for it while we're in High school after that we have to deal with the money. After that she had the Brigade help us unpack our thing and help us move into the apartment. It's just like her to get someone else to do the heavy lifting.
Our families come over later once everything is settled. I can't even describe how tense the situation was for me. But both families seem to be delighted that we're married. And you should have seen my sister running behind Haruhi calling her big sister.
Eventually everyone leaves us alone. The day just zoomed past me as I try to figure out how to deal with this. Eventually the day ends up how it started with me and Haruhi in bed.
"You're going to have to keep it in your pants tonight." Haruhi says as if she thinks I'm some sort of sexual predator. "We have to go to school tomorrow morning."
Great I'm married and I still have to go to school. "Haruhi? Do you love me?"
She places her head on my shoulder as it was her pillow. "Of course I do. Why else would I marry you."
I ponder this. Is this why you chose me? Do you really love me? Is this how you want the world to be? "Haruhi?"
I find her asleep already drooling. I sigh and forget it for the moment and try to get some sleep. I can't say it wasn't nice feeling her arms around me. I do like having Haruhi sleep next to me.
The next day Haruhi makes me get breakfast ready and we head out to the school. The biggest difference is today Haruhi wants to hold my hand all of the way there. God help me if Taniguchi sees this. I do notice a few people turn and watch us as we head to school but that was expected.
"So how's the happy newly weds?" I knew things were going too good but here come Taniguchi to fix that. "Haven't seen you two since the wedding. So how was the big night?"
"Shut up!" Both me and Haruhi tell him.
"Wow you're already talking alike."
"I warn you." Haruhi starts. "I'm in a good mood so I'll give you this warning: stop now or I'll make you run around the school naked saying that aliens just probed you."
"Yes, I would." She gave him a a smile that would send shivers down anyones spine.
Taniguchi backs off. Kunikida comes over and simply says, "Well it's good to see you two again."
He's the smart one if you can't tell.
Class starts and it's pretty much like any other class and I wish it would stay that way until I can get this sorted out. But every once in a while I catch glimpses of people looking at me and Haruhi. I bet if we were just dating they wouldn't be doing that.
I resist face palming because of my own thought. Lunch came and to my surprise Haruhi made me lunch. What really surprising is she still didn't make her own she went to got buy her lunch as always.
All she told me before she left was, "Enjoy."
I opened it up and it looked good, I knew Haruhi could cook but I wasn't expecting this, even with this whole marriage thing she still manages to surprise me.
Kunikida and Taniguchi more over to eat with me and somehow I make my way through all the terrible jokes and innuendoes that Taniguchi spouts. I'll give you an example.
"Man, Kyon, I thought getting married and getting some regularly would get the stick out of your butt."
"Wait," Kunikida interrupts. "You've thought about Kyon and Haruhi having sex before?" The ever innocent Kunikida blushes a little even asking the question.
It shuts up Taniguchi. I try not to think about it. I don't like the idea of Taniguchi thinking of Haruhi like that at all much less thinking about me and her like that. It does bring to mind something that I might have to worry about.
Class starts again and after it drags on we are finally let out. I have expect Haruhi to bolt out to the club room but it seems like she's waiting for me.
The doors slide open to reveal the green haired Tsuruya. Then the green blur grabs Haruhi by the arm. "Come along, Harls! Me and some of the girls are taking you out to get something to eat." Her smile somehow grows even more. "You can tell us all about your honey moon." If this shows me anything is that girls really think about it as much as guys. Somehow this thought is not as reassuring as I had once hoped. "We'll have her home later, stud." She gives me a light punch in the arm. As I rub my arms I notice a group of girls waiting by the door.
"Is Mikuru coming?" Haruhi asks.
"She said she couldn't make it saying she had to do something for work."
Tsuruya starts dragging her away. "Don't make me dinner then." Haruhi says not bothering to hide the smile on her face. "Tell the brigade there is no meeting today."
As they leave I get a few snickers and muffled laughs. As I face palm I realize that a certain time travel will be waiting for me along with an esper and an alien.
I make my way into the club room where the three are waiting for me. It's a shame that Asahina seems worried like the others too worried to make tea. I could really use a cup of her wonderful tea.
"Kyon, sit down we need to talk." Koizumi says.
As I sit down I notice Nagato isn't reading a book so things must be bad.
"It seems as we have no way to revert the changes." Koizumi says. "My superiors believe that if the fantasy she has created were disrupted it would lead to a series ramification for the world."
"So I'm married to Haruhi for the foreseeable future."
"I will find a way to undo this." Nagato reassures me.
"In the mean time we ask that you keep her happy." Koizumi tells me.
"So I'm just to be married to Haruhi?"
"It would seem so."
I really hate being forced into these things. "So I don't get a choice in this. I just get married and I don't get a say. I don't get to date someone. I don't get to fall in love. I don't get to even remember my wedding. My emotions don't matter. THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME!" I yell the last part my frustration bubbling up the surface.
Koizumi smile shrinks a little as he looks away. I don't think he can make an argument not even for the greater good.
"Yes, you have been asked to do a lot and there has been a great deal asked of you. It's not fair what is being asked of you but I have to ask you to think of the greater good."
Okay, Koizumi is never going to be my best man even in this fake fantasy marriage.
"K-Kyon." Asahina speaks up. "I thought you did love Miss Suzumiya."
"What?" Her innocently sounding comment surprises me.
"Uh? You two are very close. You always seem happier when she's around and she does seem happier when you're with her. You complain a lot but you do seems to be having fun. I thought you loved her but didn't say anything." She tilts her head curiously, she really thought there was something between me and Haruhi. "Maybe this is your chance to see if there is something between you two." She says as a cute little blush reaches her cheeks.
"Yes, you could just try to make things work. Play house for the meantime." Koizumi just ruined everything Asahina just said.
"I will go along with this for the moment I guess." Not that I have a choice.
"Just don't do anything that might upset her." Koizumi warns.
As I make my way home I stop reminding myself that I now live in the apartment with Haruhi. I make myself dinner and while eating it I find my self thinking about Haruhi. Being the first day back there isn't any homework so I just go to bed early. I don't know how much time has passed before I feel someone crawl into bed.
I hear a soft whisper, "Good night, Kyon."
Good night Haruhi.
What is Haruhi to me? I asked myself this before but what is the answer. Yes, she's beautiful and smart. But what does she mean to me? She's the girl that chose me of all people and saved me from my boring and ordinary life. I can't imagine my life without her anymore. As I feel Haruhi rest her head on my shoulder I think about her. This feels right. For whatever reason I feel comfortable with her. I feel like I can do anything with her. A new question comes to mind. Am I falling in love with my wife?
Words I never expected to say.
Authors Notes: So I'm writing this story and trying to squeeze it in my spring break. Let's see if I can do this whole thing by the end of the week. So leave me a a review and tell me what you think