Bella Swan awoke and opened her sole eye. It was thursday morning and time for school, but Bella thought it was waste of time for someone as smart as her. Nevertheless her father would still make her go. Bella was an unknown flatlander living who had recently moved in the small town of Trois-Triangles sur Cercle-et-Rectangle with her father a humble equilateral triangle. Unlike all other women in the world Bella was unique. She was a perfect five-pointed star polygon , which made everyone envy her.
This was Bella's first day in school in this town and she was rather nervous, but she decided to go anyway. On way outside her father gave her her lunchbox, which contained a sandwich made out rectangle shaped slices, a small circular container with juice and an apple. She poke his north vertex as goodbye and left. After walking for 10 or so hours she finally reached the huge pentagon shaped school building and entered the two-dimensional building
Bella was a very well mannered girl, because she didn't need to touch people to tell what type of shape they were, she could tell immediately and since she was star shaped she needn't use her peace cry. Everyone loved her and treated her like royalty, because she was so uniquely shaped and not irregular. But Bella was bored of this life.
She longed for something different.
It was time for Bella's biology class. That day they had to dissect square frogs, which was a verry messy job to do in 2D, because as soon as you open the frog all of the innards would spill on the person who opened the frog due to difusion. That's why the students had to wear a small line shaped (actually rectangle) cover made from see through fabric. Bella got a little dirty, but not as much as the other students. While the teacher was explaining about the internal organs, Bella saw that one of the students was looking at her. It was a handsome white colored square, who seemed different than the rest. Bella looked back at him. The square invaginated his nose inwards, because her perfume was too strong and passed her the frog insides. Both remained silent. She could not stop thinking about him throught out the whole lesson.
Nor could he.
''Miss Swan, are even paying attention?''The teacher Mrs. Y Square asked. ''Answer me this? How many ventricles does the square frog have?''
''What?'' Bella said looking at the teacher
''HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA!'' The other students started laughing at her stupidity.
''WRONG!'' The teacher yelled in her face, almost making her internal two dimensional ear pop. The bell rung signifying class was over.
''What an bitch!'' Bella sighed as she walked across the corridor. She went outside to get some fresh air, but secretely unbeknownst to her she was being followed by the square boy from class.
Suddenly a fast motored rectangle shaped vehicle was heading towards her. Bella 's eye was looking in another direction and she couldn't hear the motored vehicle. She was going to be hit and killed. But luckily, the sqaure boy pushed her and saved her from the evil motored vehicle with his super speed, which left square like shadows.
''Who are you?''She said, but the square disappeared.
She chased after him, but he tried to lose her with his super speed, but to no avail. Bella was capitain of the run team and she could easily outrun him. She caught up to him and asked ''What's your name?''
''I'm Edward Square, but you can call me Edward.''
''I'm Bella. Bella Swan.''
Bella looked at him, thinking about the power he had just used. She knew he was no ordernairy fltlander.
''What am I? Say it! Say it out loud'' Edward growled at her.
''You're a vampire.''
''Yes I am a vampire sqaure, who has been blessed with the powers of 3D by a vampire sphere!'' Edward exclained. ''Are you afraid?'' He asked.
''Do you trsut me?''
Edward then began to explain the third dimension to her and Bella immediately understood the concept of 3D, because she was super smart and opened to new ideas, unlike the rest of backwater residents of flatland.
''I'm sorry, Bella. But our love cannot be. I have been touched by the 3D. Our love is impossible.'' Edward said and angsted.
''No. I love you. Make me a vampire.''
Edward then closed in for a kiss, but they were attacked by a rag tag group of Soldier Triangles. Bella panicked, but held her cool.
''Who are they?'' Bella asked.
''These are vampire triangles. They want to kill me, because I revealed the gospel of three dimensions to a regualar shape like you.''
''But I'm a star. An unique star.''
''That you are. So that's why I must protect youuuuuu!'' Edward yelled and rushed at the triangles. He used his 3D powers to lump up and fall onto the triangles and splattered their insides into a pulp, making them explode in all of the 2D dimensions. He then rushed at one of them impailing him on his south vertex, which made that guy impale another one and he impaled another as well and so on until Edward made a huge stick out of impailed people, which he used to smack one them so hard he flew miles southwards and got impailed on a rooftop. He blood leaked and drowned some stray hexagon dogs.
Edward then launched himself and did 180 degress backflip, followed by a 360 into the third dimension and cut a triangle clear in two by landing on him with his south west side.
''Help, Edward!'' Bella yelled as she was being stabbed in one of her triangle protrusions.
''I'll save you, Bella! Hand of her.'' Edward yelled and bit the triangle's vertex and drained all his blood killing him.
But suddenly they were swarmed by a legion of triangular vampire.
''Get behind me, Bella. I'll deal with them.''
''But there's too many of them, Edward. You won't be able to do anything.'' Bella said concerned.
Suddenly a loud 8-bit howl could be heard. A pentagon overgrown with cilla appeared. He quickly dispatched the majority of the triangle vamps. Edward felt envious so he killed the rest. AFter the fight, they forest where the fights took place was littered with corpses. Bella looked at the guy who helped them. His cilla receded into his body showing his handsomer form, which made Bella wet. Bella quickly coped a fell from his abs, which left Edward most displeased.
''Who are you?'' Bella asked.
''I am Jacob. What are you doing with that loser square. I've got 5 sides. Come with me.'' Jacob said sexily to Bella. Bella didn't know what to do.
''Stop moving in on my girlfriend, you you...wanna be.'' Edward said rather awkwardly.
''What are you gonna do about it?''
''We're gonna fight over her. Winner gets to fuck her, loser dies in shame.''
''Boys you don't have to fight for me.'' Bella said while secretely liking this predicament. She was going to enjoy every moment of them fighting.
Edward leaped at Jacob and stabbed him in the penta-stomach. Jacob turned into his werewolf pentagon form and used his cilla to pick up Edward and throw him at a nearby tree. Edward regained conciousness and used his 3D power to leap on him and stomp on him, but Jacob sensed him with his werewolfish senses and dodged. Edward fell next to him. The two were now looking at each other with their eye. This was going to be the final round. Both rushed at each other at terminal velocity, which their vertecies pointed at each other. Bella licked her lips seductively as she wondered whether she'd fuck a pale angsty emo vampire square (her type) or a manly virile bisexual werewolf pentagon (also her type). But suddenly both were picked up into the third dimension by a pair of cylindrical hands. It was A Sphere.
''Stop fighting you two!'' The Sphere ordered.
Edward was silent. After all this was the man who made him a vampire.
''Lemme go!'' Jacob insisted.
''You should be silent too, after all I created you with my experiments.''
''WHAT?'' Edward was shocked.
''I isolated the lycanthropy formula and injected myself with it, becoming a Vampire Werewolf Sphere. You Jacob, were my first victim. I wanted to test if I could turn people into werewolves and I could. I could turn people into either vampires or werewolves by my own free will.'' The sphere exposited.
Everyone was speechless.
''As both of my creation you shouldn't fight. You should be friends. Plus Bella's mine anyway.'' A Sphere licked his lips seductively.
''Why you?'' Edward scremed and launched himself at the Sphere puncturing an artery which released a thick stream of horribly animated CGI blood with the density of liquid plastic, which spilled into flatland drowning hundreds of innocents. Jacob also attacked the Sphere. He bit his ass, which perforated his rectum, which because of the pressure caused inside his bowels by his anal sphincter caused a stream of liquid diarrhea to shoot out like a geyser through the newly created holes.
''Help me!'' Bella cried as she was being circled by liquid feces and blood from all sides.
''BELLA!'' Jacob and Edward yelled and tried to safe her. They both fell into the small space which wasn't full of the approaching liquids.
A Sphere finally died and his corpse fell into flatland, his perforated rectum was facing Bella.
''Bella, climb into his ass. You'll go into the 3rd dimension and you'll be safe.'' Edward yelled.
''Ewww! I'm not doing that. That's disgusting.''
''Do it!'' Jacob yelled. The vile mix of shit was blood was nearing them.
Bella had no choice. She climbed into the Sphere's large and putrid colon. She watched in horror from the perforated holes as both Edward and Jacob drowned to death in the foul concoction of blood and excrements. The flood finally stopped and after thousand of people were killed, the flood finally dispersed into pieces so small there were virtually undetectable. Bella used all of her force to roll A Sphere's body and use it as transportation. She reached her house and exited out his ass and entered her home.
As she entered she saw her father, who was reading the newspaper.
''How was your first day at school, Bella? Jesus, you smell bad. What happened to you?'' He asked.
''Long story.'' Bella answered him and left her shit stained lunch box on the ground.
Not looking her dad opened it and took the apple covered and poo and took a bite, while reading the paper. He immediately spat out the half-chewed piece.
''This apple tastes like shit!''
''Tell me about it.'' Bella said.