Jon stood next to Robb watching Bran practice his archery. The younger boy was not very good and Jon and Robb couldn't help their laughter after Bran completely missed the target for the second time. Jon often felt completely at home, like he belonged, when with his brothers. During times like these he almost forgot that he was a bastard and that he didn't truly belong. However these times were always short-lived and he was always reminded of his place, whether it be an innocently spoken work by his siblings, a snide comment by Theon, or most often a look of disdain from Lady Catelyn. His father's wife despised him and she made sure that Jon always knew that. Catelyn hid the extent of her dislike from her children, but whenever the children were turned away from her she reminded Jon. Today was no different and as Jon put away the arrows he looked up to see the hatred on Catelyn's face.
"Jon, what's the hold up?" Jon broke from his staring contest with Catelyn to turn to Robb. Robb was Jon's best friend in the entire world. He never made Jon feel out of place and he always included him. However, Robb was the future lord of Winterfell and he didn't understand what it was like to be a bastard. Robb knew that his mother did not like Jon, but he didn't know the extent of her dislike, nor did he fight her on it. Robb loved his mother dearly and Jon would never try to ruin their bond, so he kept Robb in the dark for most matters.
"Sorry. Nothing I just got distracted"
"Well come on. Father is waiting."
Jon hated watching beheadings, but he knew that it was worse for Robb. Jon would never have to behead a deserter like Robb would. Both boys rode behind the others, side by side. Jon looked over and saw that Robb's hands were shaking. The older he got, the harder the beheadings became as Robb knew that they were coming closer to the day when he would have to perform them. Jon reached over and grasped Robb's hand lightly. Robb smiled in return.
"For what?" Jon smiled back at Robb. Robb playfully punched Jon in the shoulder and they quickened their pace to meet the others.
When the party returned from the beheading, they were greeted by Lady Catelyn, Sansa, and Arya. Arya jumped for joy when she saw the six direwolves that accompanied them.
"Look what we found Mother!" Bran yelled in excitement as soon as he saw the others. "It was a sign from the old Gods that we were supposed to have them!"
"Oh really?" Lady Catelyn used a playful tone with her son, but she was obviously not happy about the addition of the direwolves.
"The direwolf is our house sigil and their was one for each of us children, so it had to be a sign from the gods!"
"Then why are there six wolves when there are only five Stark children?" Lady Catelyn looked directly at Jon when she said this and he had to look away from her cold stare.
Of course Catelyn had to ruin this. In the forest Jon saw how much Bran wanted the pup so he told his father that it was a sign from the Gods. Jon loved his siblings and would do anything to make them happy, including singling himself out in front of others. When he found the six wolf he had thought that it might have actually been a sign. A sign that he did belong in this family, no matter what outsider's thought. He was so happy on the ride home and thought that maybe he did have a place in this world, but then of course Catelyn had to be there. Suddenly Jon couldn't stand to be around Catelyn and the perfect family that he would never fully be apart of.
"Excuse me" Jon nodded towards Catelyn, grabbed his direwolf and made his exit so that the family could be alone together.
"Jon wait!" Jon heard Robb's yell but he picked up his pace and made his way back to the castle.
"Why must you always do that mother?"
"I have no clue what you are talking about Robb. I was just stating a fact."
"No you were putting Jon down, which you always do and I'm sick of it!" Robb rarely yelled at his mother, but he couldn't contain himself this time. He was so sick of her treating Jon like dirt. Didn't she see how much Jon meant to her other children? He was Robb's brother and his best friend. Jon was a kind, good, honorable man that misbehaved far less than her own children and he didn't deserve any of this. Why couldn't his mother see that Jon had spent his whole life trying to please her?
"Robb!" Catelyn looked back at her son in shock for his outburst.
"Robb watch how you speak to your mother." Lord Stark was a great father to all of his children, but he never reprimanded Catelyn for her treatment of Jon.
"Don't you see what she does to Jon father? Why do you always defend her, he is your son." Everyone was dead silent as Robb walked away to find his brother. It wasn't often the the young lord fought with his parents.
Robb found Jon in his room. Robb set grey wind down so that he could play with Ghost and Robb joined Jon on the bed.
"Are you okay Jon?"
"I'm fine." Robb looked over to see that Jon was staring at his hands and tears were forming in his eyes.
"Come here" Robb pulled Jon into his embrace as Jon began to break down.
"Shh, It's okay. It's gonna be okay." Robb kissed Jon on the head and rubbed his back soothingly.
"I'm just so sick of this. Why do I always have to be the bastard? I didn't ask for father to cheat on your mother and to be born. I just wish that for one day everyone could forget what I am and I could just truly be part of this family."
"Hey" Robb tilted Jon's head up to look him in the eyes, "You are a part of this family."
"No, I'm not. Not really." Jon tried to look away, but Robb pulled his head back and kept eye contact.
"Yes you are. Jon, you're my best friend and my brother. I don't know what I would do without you. And it's not just me. Arya loves you more than anyone, Bran wants to be just like you, Rickon follows you around and copies your every move, and father is probably more proud of you than the rest of us!"
"Sansa is a stuck up bitch that doesn't like anyone that isn't royalty" Jon had to chuckle at that. Sansa was the stereotypical lady and had no time for anyone who wasn't highborn or proper. Jon and Arya were a deep shame to her.
"I know that you all care for me, but I have no place here, I don't have a place anywhere. That's why I should just join the wall"
"Stop it. You are not joining the wall"
"yes I am. I know I always have joked about it, but this time I am serious. The wall is the only place where a bastard can earn respect and honor. It's the only place I can truly belong." Robb looked at Jon in shock. His younger brother had always talked about joining the wall, but Robb never thought he would actually do it. Robb's hands started to shake when he thought about Jon leaving him for the Knight's Watch. There had not been a day in Robb's life that Jon was not there. Robb was close to his whole family and Theon was a great friend to him, but Jon was different. Jon was his brother, his best friend, his confidante, his shoulder to lean on, his everything. Jon couldn't leave, Robb wouldn't know what to do without him."you belong with me! Can't you see that?"
"What am I going to do Robb? Stay in Winterfell forever, and be your little pet? Be a lowly soldier in your guard? Never having a wife or kids and just stand by and watch as you are married to some highborn girl and start a family of your own, a family that doesn't include me? Even if I was okay with that, your mother would never allow it!" Jon shouted at Robb, tears forming in his eyes. Robb didn't understand, he never would. Jon had to go. He couldn't spend the rest of his life here, forced to stand by and watch as Robb became lord and got married.
"First off I am going to be lord one day and my mother will have to do as I say. As for the marriage thing... I would never... I just..." Jon froze as he watch Robb struggle to find the right words. Was this really happening? Robb looked like he was either about to kiss Jon or hit him.
Then suddenly Robb said "Screw it" and the next thing Jon knew Robb had grabbed the back of his neck and was kissing him. Robb's lips were soft and somehow tasted like Robb. It didn't take long for Jon to start responding to the kiss and suddenly Robb pushed Jon down onto the bed and was unlacing his breeches. In the back of his mind Jon knew that they shouldn't be doing this. It was wrong, they were brothers, but it just felt so good. Jon froze when he felt Robb's hand on his cock. "Do you want me to stop?" Robb looked down at Jon with an unsure face.
"Gods no. Oh Robb, keep going. Please just keep going" Jon had used his own hand before, but it felt nothing like this. Robb's hand seemed to fit perfectly around his cock and it felt like Robb was made to do this, that they were made for each other. It didn't take long for Jon to cry out as he spent his seed onto Robb's hand. After Jon had cum both boys froze for a minute, looking into each other's eyes. Did that really just happen? Robb looked scared and unsure of himself. Jon hated to see that unconfident look in Robb's eyes, didn't he know that he was perfect? That he was everything to Jon?
"Jon, I'm s.." Jon cut Robb off with a kiss. He would not let Robb apologize for this when it was so right. Jon switched positions and threw Robb down on the bed, breaking their kiss for only a second. Jon quickly undid Robb breeches and pulled them off. He moved his kisses down to Robb's neck, then chest, and further south. "What are you do... Oh Gods" Robb began to moan loudly as Jon's mouth surrounded his wet cock. "Oh Jon, Oh gods, Jon, Jon, oh" Robb began to moan nonsense as Jon kept sliding his mouth up and down, up and down, up and down. Jon then started massaging Robb's balls with his hand and it was almost too much for Robb, he came quickly after that. After Robb finished the boys just laid in the bed cuddling silently. The didn't move or talk, just basked in the after glow of what they had done.
Robb was the first to speak "I have always wanted to do that."
"Really?" Jon moved his position so that he could look at Robb. He had been dreaming about doing this with Robb since he first learned what about it. Jon never believed that Robb felt the same way.
"Of course. I have been in love with you since I learned what love was. It's always been you Jon. Why do you think I have never been to the brothels with Theon or flirted with the maids?"
"I just never thought that you could possibly feel the same way."
"Well I do" Robb smiled up at Jon and they started to kiss again. Things were getting heated when a pounding on the door started. "Jon! Jon! Are you in there? Open up!" The boys jumped apart from each other as they heard the sounds of Arya. "Yeah hold on!" The boys dressed quickly and Jon went to open his door for his little sister.
"What were you guys doing in here? It's smells weird." Arya looked around the room and wrinkled her nose.
"Uh we were just talking." Robb stuttered with a panicked look on his face.
"Whatever. I have huge news! The King is coming to Winterfell!" Arya started rattling off about the royal visit and the boys looked at each other with worried faces, unsure of what this visit meant for them.