Hi, so after rewriting this story like eight times i decided that this was the best version of chapter one. Also if you didnt know this story was on hold for a while but now i feel like it is finally time to finish this story. SO hopefully i will have it done by end of September. or that's my goal anyway. I feel so lucky to have so many supporters and hope to get a lot more. But to make this story what i want it to be i need feedback. so please review and talk to me. Ask questions and point out the weird stuff that may not make sense.

Love you all,

the new aged hippie

Chapter one

"What was I to do Marie? Your acting out of control, I can't handle your temper tantrums. So you're leaving and that's the end of it!" he screamed. I couldn't control myself anymore. Like I had control in the first place. I could feel the rage that built up over the years finally spill over.

"What were you to do? What the hell could you have done? You could have acted like a father and actually spend time with me! You could stop spending all your time at work or better yet with your trampy slut of a girlfriend, that's what you could have done! You could have at least pretended like you cared you jackass!" I screamed back at his face before picking up and throwing a lamp into the fish tank. Water flooded everywhere; the fish flopped trying to breath in the air they were exposed to. Before he could grab me I went back to destroying the home. The god forsaken home I hated more than anything in the world, besides my father of course. I destroyed the plates and other dishes and broke everything in sight. Ripping the curtains, throwing vases and plants into the floor. Ripping the couch and pillows open and scattering the insides about. When his firm hand grasped hold of me at last, he slapped me across the face and stared me down with Brown squinted eyes.

"Marie Hanna Kanker, I refuse to deal with you anymore. You do drugs, drink, and your constantly get into fights. I tried sending you to juvenile but that only made it worse. I tried sending you to a detox center but that didn't work either. So go on and continue destroying the beautiful home I have sheltered you in for years. But no matter what you do I'm still sending you back to your mother!" he tore his arm away from the wrist he held and stormed out of the house, Slamming the door behind him. I didn't move until I heard his BMW drive away. For a moment I was calm, my face stung from the slap. Calmly I took every picture of Him, me, and His slutty girlfriend in the house. I sat on the kitchen floor with a pair of scissors and cut of their heads. I kept mine whole and glued them on the wall spelling out, 'Fuck you' then I sat and leaned against the couch and admired my work. After Shredding their remaining heads and body's I walked to my bedroom in the back of the house. Grabbing my purple suitcase from the top closet shelf, my black Jansport school bag from the corner of my room and my army duffle bag from under the bed I began to pack.

First filling my suitcase neatly with my clothes, a picture of my friend Harriet and me, bathroom necessities, my laptop, CD player and headphones. Then filled my duffle bag with my bed sheets and blankets, my four pairs of shoes, my stuffed lion I hide in my sock drawer, my few books, a notebook and a pencil case with some colored pencils in it, and my pillow with my pillow case with the lion on it. I walked to the front door with my packed bags and put them down while I grabbed my schoolbag and shoved a compact umbrella inside. Now being done with the packing, I went back to trashing the house. I may be being sent away against my will, but I won't go quietly that's for sure.

When I finally settled down in the front rooms chair, leaving its destruction for the morning, I fell asleep. I dreamed of a field, on a world far away from my old one. Where I was happy, and not the kind of happy you get from drugs and alcohol either, a true, pure happiness I wish I could experience. Then a cloud came, a dark red and black cloud of darkness and evil. I could smell the filth of a thousand sins. I ran but no matter how far I ran or how fast I couldn't get away. Soon it will consume me.

I woke up with my father still gone and a message on the house phone saying him and his girlfriend were going to pick me up for my flight at nine. It was seven, so I stretched, and checked my room to make sure I didn't leave anything important behind. When I was satisfied with my run through I shattered every window in the house, stained every carpet with all the food in the fridge. Ripped the cabinet doors off, hammered the marble counter tops, took every alcohol beverage and spread it all over the lawn to be light later. Shot some holes in the roof, Called up Harriet with some orders, (set the lawn ablaze before they got home,) I spray painted the mailbox to say 'child molester' and to top my masterpiece of revenge off, I took my dad's three sets of car keys for his sports car, and threw them in a sewer drain. When 8:30 rolled around I grabbed my duffle bag, suit case, and schoolbag down the curved driveway to the street. My creation can't be seen around the curve because of the forest surrounds the house. I'll be long gone by the time they see it. They pulled up at 9:15, the whore and dad in the front seat. He helped me place my bags in the back, we got in the car and we left. A heavy Silence filled the air in the car.

My mom lives in North Carolina. I hadn't seen her in years. She called on my birthday every year, and wrote me e mails once a month. She was the better of a parent than my dad. However when battling for custody as a kid, my dad won because he had the money. He fought so hard to get me only to send me away. I relaxed and cooperated, getting checked in at the airport and all. I was silent and kept my hands to myself with my eyes on the ground. Until we reached security were my father and Slut had to leave me.

"Marie I know you hate me now but one day I know you'll forgive me." He said kindly with a half-smile. I looked between dad and slut. My father's arm was around her waist as was hers on his chest. Before he could stop me I punched her in the face with all my might. She fell to the floor crying and covering her now broken nose.

"Marie!" my father yelled all kindness from before gone. He knelt down to his personal whore and aided her. "I know you hate me now but you'll thank me someday." I mocked. "Just want you to know that you're not a dad, no, you're the jackass who took me away from a loving mother for eleven years, screwed some slut and chose her over your own child. You don't want me, you don't love me, but you took me away from my mother anyway. She loved me, she cares for me. She remembers my birthday. I will not accept any of your calls and from this day on you no longer have any meaning to me." I said. I spat a loogie in fathers face and went through security, and got on the plane.

Next stop moms

*** Somewhere in North Carolina***

When my plane landed I was the last to get off. I walked off the plane in a daze from a seven hour flight. My back was sore, the kid behind me kicked it the entire time. The brat's mother did nothing about it. God I hate kids, or people in general, but mostly kids. I followed the signs to where my mom and sisters were waiting in arriving. As I came around the corner I was suddenly ambushed with a bear hug that I swear I could feel crushing my bones.

"YO MAY! Give her a little air you idiot!" a thundering loud voice filled with undying confidence yelled. Even though we only met once when I was five I knew instantly it was Lee. Her voice was like a man's, although it had a slight hint of feminine undertone in it. Even when we were kids her voice was like this. I use to fear Lee, she was always so proud, and not self-conscious at all. I guess now that I think about it, it was more like envy than fear.

May the youngest of the family let go of me and smiled brightly before yelling back at Lee.

"Damn it Lee I haven't seen her in years, I had to give her a big welcome back hug!" May has long blonde hair that reaches her lower back. She has two large buck teeth that cause her to have a lisp. Her voice is more of a middle tone like mine, but had a deeper undertone to it. Her eyes are a bright blue.

"I haven't seen her either dumbass but you don't see me suffocating her." Lee continued to argue as she gave me a less intense hug. Lee's red hair was still curled and pined as a lump on her head. Her eyes were un-visible to others even though she herself could see perfectly. They both stepped out of the way as my mom approached me. Lee and her look like twins except for the age difference, Lee could see her future self in mom. Mom's hair was as red and curly as Lee's, except her hair was pulled away from her face into a messy ponytail. I looked into her green eyes and felt the loving stare. We embraced, she smelt like I remembered, cigarette smoke, and home cooking. Odd how this mixture of scent made me feel save. My mom was different from my father. She had a laid back personality, and was always so kind. She has a job as a secretary for a doctors office. The greeting of my new family was warm and gooey, it made my heart hurt. I was still pissed at my father, but I was really happy to be here.

We grabbed the rest of my luggage and piled into a rusted, red, 1982 Chrysler LeBaron convertible. It wasn't uncomfortable; but the leather seats were hot and worn from the summer sun. Lee sat in the front while me and May were in the back seats. On we went, down an interstate to the city of Charleston, it was as busy as New York but smelled worse and it seemed less crowded on the sidewalks. Past the formality of the city we drove into the suburbs. Occasionally passing a shopping center or school, we went forth to where my mother and two sisters, and now me, live. My new home was in the trailer park called the 'Park n' Flush'. How quaint I thought as we pulled up to a blue one story home after two hours of driving.

A clothes line went from an antenna like rod on top of the home to a wood post in the ground, wet clothes blew with the wind, an old engine from the car I saw near the entrance of the park, a washer machine and a bunch of other crap lay in the front yard. It gave off this hick feeling. The home itself looked really small from the outside, hope I don't have to share a bed was my first thought. We carried my stuff inside, the front door led into a small, but nice kitchen with wood cabinets and counter top, black and white tile flooring, and bright pink walls. Straight back from the front door was a room with a closed door. The living room door frame was missing the door and a curtain was parted open next to the fridge on the right wall. In the living room there was a large, green couch fit for five people on the right wall and an old TV on the left wall. Oddly there was a small flight of stairs going down in the back corner along with a closed door at the top. Next to the TV was another door.

"Well, honey, this is home. My room is off the kitchen Lee's is over by the TV. Mays room and the bathroom are downstairs and your room is the door at the top of the stairs dear," Mom said with high spirits. She obviously wanted me to feel happy and welcome.

"It's great mom." I said with a weak smile, hoping she wouldn't notice the lie. May and Lee helped me bring my stuff into my room while mom went back into the kitchen. "We all share the bathroom, so keep your towel and shampoo with you until it's your turn. Your toothbrush can stay in the bathroom though." May said. I was left to unpack and settle in as Lee and May went to their rooms. It was just like the rest of the house. Across from the door was a window so I started with opening it up. Letting the sweat air of summer rush in and the stuffy air inside to leave. The room had a bedframe with wheels, a mattress, and two shelves above a small white beat up dresser. I went to my closet; it was one of those sliding closets with mirror doors. It had a rack with hangers and two shelves one at the top the other at the bottom. I grabbed my suit case and began unpacking. I hung my shirts and jackets up; put my jeans, shorts and skirts on the top shelf. On the lower shelf I placed my four pairs of shoes. My old black converses (which I wore on the plane over here), my green flip flops, my black combat boots and panda slippers. On top of the dresser I put all my books in a row with my picture of Harriet and me on the end. The notebook and pencil case on the right side of the dresser. The top drawer had six pairs of socks, eight pairs of undies, and three bras. The bottom drawer already had two towels shampoo and conditioner in it. My room was painted a midnight blue from when my mom thought she would get me back from my dad when I was five. It wasn't a hideous color; in fact it was quite nice. So I made my bed with my navy blue sheets and dark purple converter. I put my pillow at the top of the bed with Leo my stuffed lion. By the time I finished with my room, I was called to dinner. We had macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, and pork chops. We sat at a small table big enough for only four people in the middle of the kitchen. I ate in silence as my sisters and mother had a conversation.

"Ma, you have got to meet my future man Eddy. He's such a pipsqueak, plus he's good with his money." Lee cooed. "And my big Ed is so strong." May giggled. Mom rolled her eyes; she didn't have good luck with men being that she divorced three. She was married first to Lee's dad Butch, then mine Jonathan (bubba is his lifelong nickname), and finally Mays dad Rodney. After dinner Lee and May did the dishes and mom went to bed.

School starts in a week. I'll be attending Peach Creek High for my sophomore year. May would be a freshman and Lee was a Junior this year. I got into my green pj top that was way too big for me and my pajama shorts. I turned off the light and crawled into bed. Falling asleep quickly from physical and emotional exhaustion, I wondered what waits for me tomorrow.