Where Did You Go?
Rose found herself wandering to the console room again. They weren't back yet. It wasn't anything to be too worried about. She knew from experience that they could sometimes be gone for a few days.
And yet, to be honest, she wasn't sure if she were more bored when they were there, or when they weren't. When they weren't, she felt even more isolated than she already was; even interaction with people she couldn't see was better than none at all. And when they were, it was harder to do anything she wanted.
For some reason, anything she did to try to show them she was there failed. She had tried picking things up. But even concentrating her hardest, she would just go through things. She had tried writing a note, but that had disappeared… followed by a falsely innocent hum from the TARDIS when asked where it went. It was almost like the TARDIS didn't want them to know she was there.
But why? What was wrong with him knowing she was there? If he knew, then he might be able to help her.
With a sigh of disappointment, she made her way back to her room. As she sat down on her bed, she saw the 'Book of Rose'. She hadn't looked in it since that brief flick through the pages a few weeks ago.
Curious, she picked it up. The pictures in here were astounding. All of her or things that had happened in their time together. There was something for each memorable moment. Cardiff 1869, the Dalek, the Game Station, the Blitz, their run-ins with Cassandra, Woman Wept. Everything.
Each page gave a little more of what he had been thinking at the time. She was honestly surprised at most of it.
At the moment, she was drawn in by the pages about the Game Station. He never really spoke much about what had happened. And she could never remember. He'd very reluctantly told her that she had looked into the heart of the TARDIS, and used the power of the Time Vortex to destroy the Daleks. And he had never told her exactly what it was that had 'killed' him.
This told her much, much more.
She drank in the lines as if they were the most important things in the world. Some made her unbelievably happy. Others confused her, and some made her gasp in horror.
'Saved him. Saved his life. Saved his soul. Saved him from himself.'
'She brings him back. Pulling the life back to a dead man. A fixed point in time. Immortal.'
'He cannot live without her. It is an excruciatingly unbearable thought. And so he gives his life for hers.'
'She is all he can think of as he bursts into flames.'
'She looked into the heart of the TARDIS, and the TARDIS looked into her. Bonding them as one.'
Bonding them as one? She was part of the TARDIS? What he on about? He had told her about looking into the heart of the TARDIS. He said that it caused her memory loss and helped her pour the Time Vortex in the Dalek Emperor's head. He never said anything about being connected to the TARDIS.
And what was that about bringing someone back to life? Immortal? It wasn't him was it? Was it talking about the regeneration?
And, 'he gives his life for hers'… it was talking about her. How he died. He died saving her life… That stupid idiot. She found herself blinking away tears.
Finally putting the book down, she placed it on the table. Looking at the clock, she started when she realised that she'd been pouring over the book for five hours. Getting up and stretching, she peered out her door, listing for a sound. Surely they should be back by now. They had been gone four days now. Even that was pushing it.
She headed to the console, but when there was no sight of them, she went for the kitchen. They weren't there either, but right now she was hungry. So she grabbed together some of her favourite foods and headed out.
It was annoying that she just couldn't make them see she was there. She was getting breakfast one morning and was about to pick it up, only to find that she was going right through it. Only a few seconds later the Doctor walked through the door. He had seen her bowl, frowned at if for a moment then looked up into the ceiling of the TARDIS.
"Why do you do this to me?" he had asked. Then he sat down on her, causing her to jump away, and started to eat her breakfast. Martha had thought it was strange he was eating it. He had responded by telling her that it had been a favourite of one of his friends (her, of course) and that he supposed he just bought it out of habit.
She was glad he did, because it was her favourite and she really wanted it. It didn't exist in the other universe and she was seriously craving it. She would have to leave a list of things that she hadn't eaten in a while so that they'd actually have some.
As it was, she was making quite a dent in the TARDIS food supply. She'd already gone through just about every single bag of her favourite future sweet. It was from New Zealand in 2282. Damn, those people had such a sweet-tooth.
Grabbing the last one, she made herself a cup of tea, then headed for the library. She really hadn't spent enough time in there. And now that she was TARDIS bound, she had a lot more time on her hands to do so.
Five more days passed, and Rose was getting increasingly more worried. She and the Doctor had never been away from the TARDIS this long. Not without planning it before hand, but even then, they had always popped back for something or other. The Doctor and Martha had been gone for at least nine days…
She wasn't actually too sure. It was hard to tell on the TARDIS. The only way was the clock that she had bought on board when she had packed up her entire room and moved in for good. But now she found she didn't need quite as much sleep and with the amount of books she was reading, she wasn't looking at it very often. She was just assuming it was five days… it was most likely longer.
In that time, she had read through the entire series of Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Inkheart, and Game of Thrones, and at least two books on physics. If she was going to be stuck here, might as well understand it. She was planning on moving onto some future series. But if she was honest, fantasy was the best. Now that she wasn't out there, she craved the adventure more than ever. Sadly, the only way she could do that was by escaping into a book.
Rose finally put her books down when the TARDIS began to rumble and shake. Someone was moving her again. A lot. She'd been moved about quite a bit recently and she was worried that someone had taken her away from the Doctor, and that's why he wasn't back. But there was no way for her to help him with that. She couldn't fly the TARDIS, couldn't leave it, and had no idea where he was outside of it.
There was nothing she could do. It made her feel so useless.
She sprinted into the console room just in time to see a man and woman tumble in and close the door.
"Who the hell are you?" she asked. Of course, they couldn't hear her. They just looked about in awe a moment, before slowly walking up the ramp. They stopped when a bluish hologram of the Doctor, much like the one she had seen, only of this incarnation, appeared in the next level.
'This is security protocol 712,' the hologram Doctor said. 'This time capsule has detected the presence of an authorised control disk, valid one journey." The man opened a DVD case to find that the DVD inside was glowing. 'Please insert the disc and prepare for departure.'
The hologram faded away and the woman began looking around the console for where to put it. "Looks like a DVD player," she said, pointing to a spot on the console. "There's a slot."
Suddenly they all toppled over as a huge jolt shook the TARDIS. The lights flashed and they had to cling to the console so they didn't end up down in the garden room.
"They're trying to get in!" the man said.
"Well, hurry up then!" the woman cried.
"Don't worry," Rose said, despite the fact they would never hear her reassurances. "Nothing can get through those doors. We're safe, so just hold on."
Finally the man slid the glowing disk into the slot on the console and the central column began to move up and down. Rose stared at in surprise. Sure, she'd heard what the hologram Doctor had said, but she hadn't actually thought that it would program the TARDIS to go somewhere.
"What's happening?" the man said, looking around in panic. Rose noticed that they were flickering. She had seen this before. The TARDIS was going to dematerialise without them… leaving them to whatever was out there…
"Oh my god! It's leaving us behind!" the woman said. "Doctor, no, you can't! Doctor!" The man came and huddled into her. They clung together fearfully… And Rose could only watch helplessly as they faded away.
She stared at the place where the two people had been crouched until the door banging open startled her into looking up. Still, she couldn't help the smile spreading across her face when the Doctor came in.
"Yep!" he said to Martha who followed in behind him. "And it's all thanks to Sally Sparrow!"
"But… hang on," Martha said, looking around. "Where is she?"
"Oh, I didn't want to pull her from her own time-stream. There's been enough of that, don't you think? No, the TARDIS would have dematerialised around her."
"But what about the Weeping Angels?"
"Yeah, Doctor," Rose said. "What about the Weeping Angels?" She assumed they were what had been attacking the TARDIS. She knew that no one could hear her, but she would go insane not talking at all, just because she couldn't be heard.
"Oh, they're fine. If I'm right, and I always am, they would have been trying to get into the TARDIS. There were four of them. One for each side. When the TARDIS dematerialised, they would have been left facing each other."
"So they'd be stuck looking at each other forever… they'll never move!" Martha said. Then something else seemed to sink in. "Oh my god! We're back!"
"Home sweet home!" the Doctor grinned.
"No more bloody 1969!"
"Yep," he said.
Rose breathed a sigh of relief. If they weren't worried, then she shouldn't be either. It sounded like the Doctor had everything sorted.
"I'm going to go have a shower… And then burn that god-awful uniform. Promise me we're never going back there. I think I've had enough of that place for one lifetime. Did you see the way some people looked at me? I didn't think racism was that bad back then."
"Yeah, sorry about that. There might not have been segregation, but some people could still be pretty prejudiced."
"Well, it wasn't as bad as 1923, I'll give you that. Can the next place we go be somewhere where people don't care if I'm black?"
The Doctor laughed. It was only an accident, those last two places. "Sure." Trying not to laugh herself, Martha left the room and the Doctor set the TARDIS in motion. "Goodbye, 1969!" he said gleefully. "Ugh, never again! I am never going to get stranded without my lovely TARDIS ever again, am I, old girl? No sir-ee!"
"You lost the TARDIS!" Rose said, very close to laughter. "You know, you don't really have a very good track record for that."
With a fond smile she sat and watched as he talked away and caught up with his TARDIS… in other words, did some tinkering. It was almost like old times… if only he knew she was there.
About half an hour later, she followed him as he headed off to the kitchen. She had missed human contact for the last few weeks. Martha was already sitting at the table when they came in, eating what looked to be just a toasty sandwich.
When he opened the cupboard door to grab himself something, she saw that, yet again, the note she had written was gone. She and stuck the note asking for more if her favourite sweets on the inside of the door. It wasn't there for him to see, so it was something else that bought him up short.
"Where's her food gone?!" he said. His brow creased in confusion as he sorted through the cupboard, but it was clear that half of it was gone.
"Sorry?" Martha said.
"Rose's food is gone."
"Rose…" she raised a sceptical eyebrow.
"Okay, this is going to sound really stupid, but… I still buy all her favourite foods." He sat down opposite her and Rose sat on the already pushed out chair beside him… she had the feeling it wouldn't budge if she tried to move it.
"Is this like with breakfast last time, before we got stuck?" she asked. "I don't get it. She's gone. Why do you still buy it?" To the Doctor's credit, he didn't even flinch when Martha had bluntly said she was gone.
"Habit," he shrugged. "And I guess that somewhere deep down… I still hope she'll come back." He spoke with a calm neutral voice, but Rose could hear the slight wistful tint to it.
"I have come back," she told him.
"You never told me, where is she?"
The Doctor hesitated. "With her family."
"Yeah, you've told me that part. Where, though?"
"London, I guess," he said evasively.
"If you really want her back, then why don't you go get her? How hard could it be to find someone in London when you have a TARDIS?"
"Harder than you think," he said wearily.
"Would she come back with you?"
"Yes," both Rose and the Doctor said immediately. The Doctor carried on. "Yes, I have no doubt she would. Her leaving wasn't really something either of us wanted."
"Then why did she leave?"
"Martha, can we please just drop it?" he said. Martha looked at him a long moment before nodding and taking another bite of her sandwich. The Doctor sighed quietly and looked down at the table, so he missed her somewhat sour look.
Rose could somewhat understand the girl, having fallen for the Doctor herself. She knew that the Doctor could be quite a flirt without realising it, and he was attractive enough to entice quite a few women. There had been plenty of times she had felt jealous, but the only time it had hurt was when she believed he actually did love someone back… She didn't blame him for Reinette. It's not like she had a claim on him…
And now it certainly seemed like he loved her back… She wondered whether it was just the fact that he had lost her recently, in such a horrible way, that had him clinging to the hope of her, or if she might have become just another past companion of it had been a different way.
Then again… what he had said on the beach… he was going to say something.
"Well," Rose said. "If I could actually find a way to tell you I'm here without the TARDIS stopping me, you would only have to find a way to bring me back into your… I don't know, just make me corporeal! Honestly, since I can't leave, at this rate I'm going to be a genius if I keep reading through that library of yours. And since you can't hear me, Doctor, I stole that banana cake you told Martha not to eat."
The Doctor only stood, looked suspiciously through the cupboard, giving it a bit of a scan with the sonic, then with a shrug, fixed himself a meal. She sat there and watched them. Nothing much was said for the rest of the night. She had been watching them before and most nights were like this. Sometimes they would have small conversations and laugh about… but it was never like it had been with her and the Doctor.
Half the time they'd struggle to eat because they were laughing or talking too much, or jumping around, even trying to mush their food on the other. The Doctor and Martha… they weren't always exactly quiet, but they seemed rather normal in comparison. And she wanted him to be like he used to be, so bright and happy. Everything he did just radiated energy and joy. He was manic and wonderful. It wasn't very often that he wasn't, only when something really bad happened.
She had to find a way to let him know she was here. She didn't understand why the TARDIS was trying to stop her. She would find a way around it. She promised herself she would let him know.
I know, FINALLY another chapter! When I posted the last chapter, I got lots of reviews asking why she doesn't leave him a note, that was actually something I'd already written. And I'm going to have to stop this authors note now because my boyfriend keeps trying to steal me back, I've been trying to post this for the past 5 hours!