Author's Note: HEEEEELLLOOOOO all of you! Before I introduce you to this chapter, I will say, to start this all off, that I am SOOOO EXCITED! You can't possibly be more excited than I am. If the title turns you off, please don't! This is the BIIGGG chapter! I have planned this chapter over and over and over again in my mind so many times that it has worn through, but I hope you all still like it! Without further ado, When Things Fall Apart!
Chapter 17: When Things Fall Apart
I woke up on the Sunday after the barbeque, my head clear. Since the event happened on Monday, it took a few days for my hangover to completely disappear, but it seemed to be gone now, thankfully. I leaped up out of bed, running over to the calendar on the wall, then sighing. Today would be the last day of the boredom of being grounded, but what a long day it would be. Every other kid in my own generation of Weasley/Potters would be going down to the swimming hole today, and I would not be allowed with them. Scorpius was also going...
Scorpius. I hadn't talked to him ever since the game of Truth or Dare, at the end of the school year. I don't know why, I just feel…. Hurt. Why didn't he kiss me? I mean it's not like I wanted him to or anything it's just that…. A lot of people find the loophole of kissing on the cheek useful, but he isn't one of them. He has made out with many girls on the instruction of "kissing" them in Truth or Dare, so what would stop him with me? But it's not like I wanted him to kiss me.
But I did. I did want him to kiss me, and I don't know why. When his lips touched my cheek, I felt something. I could feel it… burning inside of me… it was so powerful…. But could it be real? The problem was: I couldn't feel this way about Scorpius. I just couldn't. It would ruin our friendship, and I had no right to expect anything more than that from him anyway. Shaking my head vigorously, I leapt into my bathroom, turning on the shower and sheading my clothes quickly. I stepped into the spray, shivering at its icy temperature. It warmed slowly, and I sighed as the hot water came down my back.
When I'm done, I step out, wrapping a towel around me and stepping out into my room. Immediately, I scream. Albus whirls around to stare at me.
"What the hell are you doing in here?" I ask him, wrapping my towel closer to my wet body.
"Good morning to you too, Rosie." Albus smirks.
"Good morning Albus." I say, a fake smile plastered on my face, then I let it slide off. "Get out of my room."
"Wow, Rose, PMS much? Just wanted to tell you that Scorpius is here. You probably should get dressed. Or don't. I don't think Scorpius mi—"
"OUT!" Al chuckles as he ducks out the door, slamming it after him. I snatch my wand off my bedside table, flicking it so that my door locks magically.
I sighed as my gaze washed over the Burrow's kitchen. It was all I could do to stop myself from racing after Al up the stairs to see Rose myself. The last time I had spoken to her was the Truth or Dare her family had held at the end of the year, like always. I knew she was angry. I could picture her reaction in my head, crossing her arms and glaring at me. 'You could have done the dare for real! What's so different about me than the other girls?'. I was glad she had not confronted me, in a way, because, with all honesty, I couldn't think of a way to respond to that logic. The real reason of it was that, though I could have easily kissed her, if I had I wouldn't be able to control myself.
I had come a long way since second and third year when I had to control my breathing if Rose sucked on the end of her quill while writing an essay. I wasn't a complete pervert, though. And, actually, the only reason (apart from my good looks and charm) that I wasn't a virgin was because those spells of sexual frustration. The first time I had done it with a girl was with some Ravenclaw a year older than me, at the very end of fourth. The second time was with Abigail. These were the only times I had ever had sex.
The day with Abby was something that I wasn't proud of. It wasn't something that I had really thought about, and if I had been in my right mind, then I wouldn't have done it. The reason I was most ashamed of it, however, is because it happened on March 1st. For those of you who don't know, that means it happened on Lina's birthday.
I truly hadn't been in my right mind that day. The morning was fine, but my mood had gone downhill, along with my appetite, when, right before lunchtime, I had walked into what I thought was a deserted corridor to find Rose and Longbottom snogging. And when I say snogging, I mean hardcore snogging—tongue and everything—not just a peck on the lips to go off to class. They didn't even realize I was there, and I backed right out of the shortcut to go to Defense, taking the long way all around the castle. After the class was over, Abby caught up to me and asked me what was wrong. I said nothing, and she kept walking with me, silent. All our friends walked faster than us, eager for the free period they had after that. I watched Rose walk away, hand in hand with Longbottom, and anger had surged up inside of me. Looking sideways at Abby, I caught her staring at me. We stopped, and I turned to her, leaning down sharply and pressing my lips to hers. "Don't tell anyone about this." I managed to say before pushing her into a broom cupboard.
When Rose had confronted me about it, I didn't tell her why. I didn't tell her I was the one that instigated it. I didn't bother to say that it was because of her, because seeing her locked in a tight embrace with her boyfriend made my heart break over and over again.
"Hey mate." Al's voice interrupted my thoughts, and I turned my head around sharply to see him at the bottom of the staircase, swaggering over to him.
"Hey, Al. Rose coming down anytime soon?" I ask, looking away from the window I had been staring at the whole time I'd been thinking.
"Dunno. She had just come out of the shower when I came in—luckily with a towel around her mind you—and she screamed at me to get out. I told her to get dressed and come down, though I also said you might not mind if she just wears that downstairs."
"Nice." I deadpan, looking around the kitchen again. He puts an arm on my shoulder.
"You sure you don't want to come swimming with us, Scorp? I mean, it is summer after all…" Al trailed off, looking out the open window as well and fiddling with the bottom of his muggle t-shirt. His eyes took on a far away look, and I wondered what he was thinking about.
"Nah, I'll just keep Rose company. Sucks about her being grounded." I said. Al nodded, but I knew he wasn't really paying attention. We stared out the window for a moment, until I heard the slight sound of a throat being cleared behind me. Rose stood in the doorway, cheeks slightly flushed at the sight of us.
"Are you two going down to the swimming hole?" she asked us. Albus cleared his throat.
"I am." She nodded, and walked past us, out to the porch, not bothering to ask me. I sighed as I looked after her, my eyes longingly resting on her figure. Al goes to follow her out, and I go after him.
"Are your family planning any trips this year, Al? You went to America last summer." Rose inquired to her cousin, sitting down on the large porch swing and looking up at us. She doesn't look at me, though, just Albus. Al grins at her, sitting down in the middle of the swing.
"Nah, my parents decided to take a year off. No hot American girls this summer for me to hook up with." He smiled as he said it, but there was something off in his eyes. I made a mental note to ask Albus about it later as I sat down beside him. "What about you Rosie?"
"Nothing planned with my family. I'm going over to Lina's sometime this summer though, don't know when." She smiled a placid smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "And as for you Al, I'm sure you'll find someone who will have you. Another drunk snog at a pub again I expect." Albus laughed shortly. A silence filled the porch. I guess both of my friends had something going on with them. The silence was broken as Lucy called to Al from the porch, gesturing towards the water, a pure white sundress complementing her form. Al nodded to her and stood up.
"I'm going to go. You two…." He trailed off as he looked between us, fully registering the cold silence. "….just… you know, have fun or whatever." He turned away and raced after Lucy and Molly. Rose turned her head and a faint smile crossed her perfect lips. I looked at them too. Al had fallen into step next to Lucy, who had her arm linked through Molly's. I sighed. Sometime over the year, the two sisters had had a fight about Molly's new makeover the girls had given her. They hadn't spoken for a few months, but they had made up around the same time the term ended. They had recognized their differences, and were the closest of friends once more. How I wished that would happen with Rose and I. Speaking of Rose…
"Have you had breakfast?" She asked, looking sideways at me cautiously. I shook my head, and she gave me a light grin. "Well, come on then!" Ten minutes later we sat eating at the base of a tree in the orchard, the one where everyone's initials had been written. Mostly there were just the initials of couples. The very oldest read: AW+MP, for Grandma and Grandpa. Through the ages though, there was GW+HP, HG+RW, PW+AS, and FD+BW. As we munched on toast, an awkward silence settled between us. I dusted off my hands of the last crumbs of my toast and leaned back against the slender maple.
"I wish I could come here more often." I said, trying to break the tension.
"Mmmhmm…" Rose hummed slightly, using this sound to confirm that she heard me. I sighed slightly and went on.
"If only your dad—"
"What about my dad?" Rose sat up sharply, sitting up and leaning over so that she could face me. I blinked at her sudden movement and the anger in her voice.
"I was just going to say that if only your dad didn't hold a grudge against my family." I knew at once that I had said the wrong thing, for Rose stood up suddenly.
"You act like it's my father's fault." She said angrily. Matching her anger, I leaped to my feet.
"Then whose fault is it? Mine?"
"Well it's not my father's fault he can't trust you! You look like his enemy!" Rose yelled at me.
"And that's my fault? Your dad has to know that mine is not happy with what he's done! Do you think he's proud?"
"That's not fair! My dad has no reason to forgive yours!"
"NO REASON? How about the reason that everyone makes mistakes?"
"You don't even know how hard everything is for my dad."
"Oh, yes, accepting that his old school enemy's son is friends with his daughter. Must be horribly hard!" Rose looks furious, and she points one finger at me, stepping closer.
"You're not the one to come home every Christmas and summer and have your father look at you disappointedly. You're not the one who has to have their father hate their best friend! You're not the one who has to endure his glares at your best friend and him never being happy!"
"So what do you want me to do, leave?"
"I don't know what I want you to do!"
"It's not my fault your father hates me, Rose! I've tried hard, too."
"Tried hard? You just try to annoy him! Why would you even want to try hard? What does it mean to you?" I stared at her, my chest heaving.
"What does it mean to me? Fuck, Rose, it means the world to me." She stares back at me, her blue eyes boring into mine.
"Why? Why does it mean anything to you? Why would—" She couldn't go on, though, because I had kissed her.
Shock jolted through my body as Scorpius brought his lips to meet mine. I froze as he kissed me, his lips tasting of the butter from the toast and a little of chocolate. His warm mouth moved against mine. My world unfroze, and without thinking, without realizing what I was doing, I kissed back. My arms wrapped slowly around his neck, and his hands steadied my waist. I brought the kiss deeper, pulling his tighter, not wanting to let go. He's an even better kisser than Frank. I managed to think, and then I paused, coming back to my senses. What was I doing? Scorpius was my best friend, I had told myself that before in the morning, I had told myself this in the morning, I had told myself I couldn't think of him this way. I pulled away, disconnecting our lips, unwinding my arms from his neck. He pulled away from me, stepping back to give me space and letting his arms fall to his sides. He searched my face. I was still staring at the ground in front of me, wondering what had just happened. Then it hit me. I looked up into Scorpius' eyes; my own blue eyes panicked.
"Oh my god." I said, taking a few paces away. "Oh my god." I looked in horror at Scorpius, and began to move faster away from him.
"Rose—" he started toward me, but I moved away.
"I'm so sorry." I said hysterically, moving away. "I'm so sorry." I began to run back to the house, not stopping when I heard him call my name again, and I didn't stop once until I reached my room, slamming it behind me and collapsing onto the bed, sobbing.
She had run. She had run away when I kissed her. For a moment I thought she wouldn't, thought she would break away and tell me she loved me, or something like that. I had hoped she would stay. I had hoped she would be fine. She had run. She had run away when I kissed her.
I looked blankly up at my ceiling, studying the cracks that run through it. The one I had looked at most in the last few weeks resembled a heart…. Or maybe it was just my brain deluding me. I didn't know what to do. I hadn't done anything this holiday; although I was not grounded anymore I didn't bother to go out. Out would mean seeing Scorpius, and after what had happened last Sunday, I couldn't possibly do that. I was mortified. I couldn't face him, couldn't face the fact that we had kissed and I shouldn't have… shouldn't have even thought about it. Suddenly a thought was brought to the forefront of my mind.
You will come over this year, won't you? Lina's voice replayed into my head. I leaped up, dashing over to the door and racing down the stairs. "MUM?" I yelled at the floor of my mum and dad's room at large. Hermione Weasley popped her head out of her door, looking slightly surprised to see me standing there in just my pajamas.
"Yes, Rosie? What is it?" I wrung my hands.
"I was wondering if I could possibly go over to Lina's for the rest of the summer?" My mother pulled her whole body out of the crack in the door, folding her arms and looking at me quizzically. She was dressed in a white robe and her slippers. I wondered if dad was still asleep.
"Of course you can, but why now? Did something happen?" My mother knew me all too well. Maybe it was because I was very like her sometimes, in emotional terms.
"No, everything's fine," I lied, feeling guilty. "I just want to go over there because I just remembered. I didn't go last year, so I feel I should make it up to her." My mother nods, still looking wary.
"Okay, then. I guess you can come back at the end of the summer to get your stuff and go with us to King's Cross." I fake smiled, shaking my head.
"I'll just bring my stuff to Lina's. I'll owl you though." My mother nodded, and I turned back to go downstairs. I had to call her before, even though I knew she would consent. Picking up the telephone, I dialed the number I had memorized and waited for the first ring. It came, and after a few moments my friend came to the line.
"Hello?" she said curiously.
"Hey Lina." I spoke hoarsely into the phone, then cleared my throat.
"Rose!" she exclaimed. "What's up?"
"Can I come over? Now?" I asked, and for the first time since Sunday, tears clouded my sight. I brushed them away.
"Of course." My friend said understandingly of my tone. "Do you want to stay the rest of the summer?"
"Yeah, if that's okay."
"It's fine. Come over whenever you like." I muttered thanks and hung up the phone, brushing away the tears. I then raced back up to my room and stuffed everything I could reach into my trunk, waving my wand to make it all fit. Looking in the mirror, I examined my reflection. I was wearing mini pajama shorts and a pink top. I changed quickly, brushing my hair and splashing my face to wake me up. I was just about to joist my trunk up with my wand and magic it out of the clean room when something caught my eye. It was settled on my desk next to my stationary. A letter. Stepping closer to it warily, I saw my name written in elegant script on the middle of the envelope. I knew the handwriting. Scorpius.
I wondered how long it had been sitting there. I definitely hadn't put it there, and hadn't been in the room when it was delivered. How could he have— My thought were broken through when Aurora screeched in impatience, flexing her wings in the small cage. I looked around the room quickly, looked back to the letter, and then stuffed it into my pocket. I would read it later. Grasping my belongings in one hand and my wand in the other, I turned on the spot, holding my destination in mind. 29 Hayes Street, Bromley, United Kingdom.
I lay beside Lina on her double bed, trying to sleep as one of my best friend breathed next to me. Giving up, I sighed and pulled the letter Scorpius had left for me out from under my bed, opening it softly and folding out the parchment to read.
I know what you're expecting me to say. It was a mistake. We should just be friends. It's me, not you. Well, screw that. I've been in love with you ever since second year. I'm not going to say sorry. I'm not going to say that we should forget. What I'm going to say is: We are not our ancestors. The past will not dictate our future. What I'm going to say is: Will you go out with me?
I read the letter over and over again in my brain as I began to fall asleep next to Lina.
I know what you're expecting me to say. It was a mistake. We should be friends. It's me, not you.
I was expecting you to say that.
Well, screw that.
I was hoping you'd say that, too.
I've been in love with you ever since second year.
I'm not going to say sorry.
I'm not asking you to.
I'm not going to say that we should forget.
We can't forget.
We are not our ancestors.
I know that.
The past will not dictate our future.
How can it not?
Will you go out with me?
A/N: Thank you all of my readers for following me! Yes, this is the end of The Spark, but not the end of the series, I promise. As soon as I post this, the first chapter of Us will be posted, too. I hope you will all stay with me. By the way, I would like my reviewers to answer the following questions about my story.
Who is the character you feel most like?
What character would you like to hear more from?
What is your favorite couple?
What role would you like Hugo to play in the future?
Thanks! Marauder on, all!