Hi! This fic is (very) loosely based on episode 9x10 (Sins of the Father). Not for DiNozzo Senior-fans. Tony/Gibbs slash. Hope you like! :)
Disclaimer: Sadly, I own nothing :(
Tony flexes his fingers and – for the hundredth time in a half hour – wonders if he should stay away. As soon as he considers leaving, the feeling of dread he's been having all day returns full force. This is the only place he can come and feel secure after the past few days he's had. He takes a deep breath and opens the door, stepping into the warm living room.
He calls his name and expects the answer to come out of the basement but the answer comes out of the kitchen.
As soon as he sees the older man, the feeling of dread subsides and a sense of peace washes over him. only years of practice have taught him to sound as casual as he does.
"Hey. He slumps down in the chair next to Gibbs' and looks away for a moment. Even though he doesn't look Gibbs in the eyes, the older man senses something is wrong. Again Tony wonders why he came here of all places. He could just as easily go to a bar and drown the problem. But then again, he knows that part of it will never go away. Finally he starts talking.
"My old man did it again. Went by the hotel to see him.. he's gone! Checked out. Did I get a phone call? No. He didn't even tell me. Shouldn't be surprised. What am I gonna do with that guy? He makes me crazy!" Tony balls his fist and relaxes it again. Gibbs doesn't say anything and it always works on him so he keeps talking.
"I should be really pissed off with him." But should I, really?
Finally the older man replies. "Hmm. So, why aren't ya?"
Tony shrugs and for a moment he honestly wonders why he isn't more pissed off at Senior.
"I really thought I was gonna lose him there for a second… And as crazy as he makes me.. I do love the guy." But should I, really? "The pathetic thing is, I've never been able to tell him." Maybe because he's never once said it to you.
Suddenly Tony hears footsteps behind him and he turns around to find his father standing there.
"Consider it done, junior."
Tony jerks his head in Gibbs' direction and stares at him, as if that'll make the older man explain himself. He glances back at his father. "What are you doing here?"
Senior shrugs. "Well, when the deal fell through I couldn't afford the hotel and Gibbs offered me a room. A cold shiver creeps up Tony's spine and he quickly glances at his boss.
"Really, you're staying in town?" Suddenly he wants the older man gone, preferably as far away from Gibbs as possible.
"Thursday is Thanksgiving. I wanted to be with you." For an instant, Tony believes him and a smile blossoms on his face. Unconsciously loosening up his tie, he tries to force down the nervous feeling that won't completely let go of him.
Then the older man sticks his hand inside the turkey that lies before him and grabs the intestines, holding them out to Tony. "Do something with this, junior."
An hour later, Gibbs is working in the basement. He looks around him for his mug but can't find it so he walks up the stairs to get one from the kitchen. He's about to walk into the living room when he overhears Senior and Tony talking.
"So… What did you and Gibbs talk about before I got here?"
"He told me you never wanted my money, that you need a father."
Gibbs smiles softly. It seems like they're finally gonna talk about this. However, the course of the conversation changes quickly.
Tony huffs out a sarcastic laugh. "Yeah, that's not gonna happen."
When Senior answers, his voice is cold as ice and there is no trace of any affection that Gibbs thought he'd seen in Senior.
"You made sure of that yourself, Anthony."
"yeah, well. I can't do anything to change that so –"
Senior interrupts him. "Does Gibbs know?" Apparently he thinks his question is funny because he laughs and then corrects himself. "Probably not, he'd have fired you long ago if he did."
Gibbs frowns. What doesn't he know about Tony?
Tony's voice is soft now. When he answers it's almost a whisper, as if he won't believe his own words if he says them out loud.
"Gibbs values me. I'm a part of the team."
Senior reaches out and gently squeezes Tony's shoulder. His words cut like razorblades. "Oh, Anthony. If your own father doesn't value you, who will?"
The man's words send Gibbs into a blind rage and he barges into the room, coming to stand between the older man and his son. Tony lays a hand on his arm and tries to pull him back. When Gibbs looks at him, he notices that Tony looks more panicked than he's ever seen him. Even when held under gunpoint, the man has never looked as terrified as he does now. He turns back around to stare at Tony's father.
"Get out of my house, now."
Gibbs balls up his fists to keep from reaching out and strangling the guy. He can't explain the urge he feels to protect his Second in Command but at this moment, he wants to make anyone who hurts the younger man feel pain.
Senior mocks innocence and he touches his chest with his hand.
"Did I do something to offend you, Gibbs?"
"You disgust me. Now get the fuck out of my house." His voice is steel and Tony feels an involuntary shiver run across his spine.
DiNozzo Senior huffs as he grabs his coat. "You're disgusted by the wrong person in the room." Finally he leaves the house with a slamming door and when Gibbs turns around, he notices Tony sitting on the edge of the couch, looking lost. He approaches the younger man and reaches out to touch his shoulder, only to have Tony twist away to get further away from him.
"I… I have to go", the younger man begins to feel his pockets for his keys and jerks his head up to look around the room when he doesn't immediately find them.
"Tony? Tony!" Commanding the younger man always works. He looks up at Gibbs and the older man nearly sits on his hands to keep from pulling Tony in a hug. Something tells him that if he hugs the man right now, he'll flee and never come back. So he sits there, next to Tony, patiently waiting for the younger man to start talking though he has the urge to grab him by the shoulders and shake the truth out of him. But Tony averts his eyes from him and stares at the floor for several minutes without uttering a single syllable.
Gibbs gently nudges the younger man with his shoulder and Tony looks up at him as if he only now realizes that he isn't alone.
"What does your father blame you for?"
Tony shrugs and looks away. "It's… nothing, just something that happened years ago when I was young."
"What happened, then?"
Tony visibly grows more agitated and he scoots further away from Gibbs. "I told you, it's nothing."
"Tony, come on… that wasn't nothing."
"Gibbs. I don't wanna talk about it, okay?"
The silver haired man moves back involuntarily and sighs. Tony is obviously irritated and he'll get nothing out of him like this. "Okay. Wanna help me in the basement?"
After a short moment of hesitation, Tony nods numbly and stands up to follow him down the stairs. After a detour past the kitchen to fetch two mugs, Gibbs pours them both a generous amount of the good-quality-bourbon. Tony accepts a mug from Gibbs, swallows the liquor down in a single large gulp and holds it out. Gibbs pours him a second drink without comment and watches as the younger man gulp it down again. Only the third drink is nurtured in his hands, and he takes small sips while getting lost in thought again. Gibbs presses a sander block into his hands and starts working on the other side of the boat.
An hour is spent in silence before Tony – who has just poured himself a fifth drink – finally speaks. Or actually, he just laughs.
"What's funny?" Gibbs' voice is husky and he watches Tony shiver.
"Just that… my father was flirting with Ziva this morning and McGee told me that I didn't have to be jealous."
Gibbs swallows down the sudden surge of jealousy and forces himself to stay calm.
"Were you? Jealous?"
Tony laughs again. "No, that's the funny part." The smile on his face falters and he glances at Gibbs before focusing back on the beam before him.
"Nobody knows me." it's barely a whisper and it tugs at Gibbs' heart. Gibbs carefully avoids staring at the younger man and resumes his work.
"Tony, what happened all those years ago?"
At last, Tony answers his question.
"My father saw me kissing a friend after school." Just when Gibbs is about to ask what the problem was, Tony continues. "My friend Derek."
Gibbs couldn't have stopped himself from staring at Tony. Tony smiles sadly at Gibbs' reaction. It takes a moment before the older man composes himself.
"Nope." God, it was like pulling teeth.
"So Derek was the only boy you kissed?"
"No. I mean I'm gay." Tony is avoiding all eye contact at this point. He's given up the pretense of working on the boat and just stares at the work bench.
Why hadn't Gibbs seen this before? The older man racks his brain for signals that the younger man wasn't who he wanted everyone to believe but he can't come up with anything. Sure, he'd often thought that Tony exaggerated his stories about his female conquests but it never once occurred to him that there were no women at all. Suddenly he remembers the conversation from before between Tony and his father and he frowns.
"Why did Senior think I would fire you if I knew?"
The older man had said that if he didn't love Tony, no one would. Did Tony love someone?
"Tony?" He looks up and the instant their eyes meet, he knows.
The younger man's big green eyes stare right into his and the fear of being discovered is right there, and Gibbs wonders how he could possibly have missed this before.
"Tony? Do you have feelings for –"
The Italian holds up a hand. "Please. Please don't say it."
Gibbs' eyes close briefly as a whirlwind of emotions courses through him. Relief. Happiness. Anger.
Gibbs walks around the boat and approaches Tony who visibly suppresses the urge to run out of the house as fast as he can. For a moment the two men just stand there, in each other's personal space, trying to absorb every little detail about the other. Finally, Gibbs tugs the younger man against his chest and wraps his strong arms around him. After a few moments of stunned silence, he feels Tony's arms coming up and the hug is returned. He gently presses a kiss against the younger man's temple and runs his fingers through his soft hair when he feels the tremors running across Tony's back. He feels the warmth of hot tears against his chest before the muffled sound reaches his ears and he holds the man tighter against him as heartbreaking sobs wreck his body.
He doesn't know how long they stand there but at last, the shaking subsides until Tony carefully puts more distance between them. At the sight of his tear streaked face, Gibbs wants to hunt Senior down and make him pay.
"Thanks", Tony whispers and he takes a ragged breath. Then he blindly reaches for his mug and takes another swallow, letting the amber liquid burn its way down his throat. It's oddly consoling and he feels somewhat fuzzy, not sure whether it's because of the alcohol or because of Gibbs' intense stare. It's not stern however, not how he usually stares. The older man's eyes are full of concern but there's also an overwhelming affection emanating from him. A soft smile tugs at the corners of his mouth and he doesn't seem to suppress it like he usually does.
Gibbs jerks his head in the direction of the stairs and Tony follows him into the living room where he sits down on the couch. Gibbs joins him a moment later with two mugs of steaming coffee and Tony smiles when he notices Gibbs has added milk and sugar to his.
"I was older than you."
Tony frowns at the older man. "What do you mean?"
"When I kissed the first guy. Not long after I enlisted."
Tony swallows down his gulp of hot coffee and winces when it burns his tongue. Only when he's done waving his hands in front of his mouth, his tongue hanging out and he notices an amused Gibbs watching him, does he realize the full meaning of what Gibbs just said.
"Wait... The first guy?"
"Yeah, I definitely hope he won't be the last." Again that beautiful smile and it's directed at him...
Tony tries to force an answer over his lips and he opens his mouth several times but nothing comes out.
Gibbs laughs out loud and he shakes his head before he scoots closer to Tony.
"Never thought this would be how I'd finally get you to shut up."
Tony smiles too and Gibbs can't hold it in any longer. He gently cups Tony's cheeks and makes sure the younger man can only watch him when - for the first time - he says out loud what he realized years ago.
"I love you, Tony. And nothing can change that." Tony is doing a very credible imitation of a goldfish, gaping at him like this is the first time someone's said those words to him. the realization hits the silver haired man like a ton of bricks – this probably is the first time someone's said 'I love you' to Tony.
His calloused thumb caresses the younger man's cheek and Gibbs leans in, pressing a soft kiss against Tony's cheek. And a kiss against his lips. And another. And then the younger man finally seems to realize that this is, in fact, really happening and he kisses back with a passion that makes Gibbs' knees tremble, even though he's sitting down.
Tony cups the back of his head and forces them even closer together but the closeness still doesn't seem to satisfy the Italian as he gently pushes Gibbs down until he's lying on the couch and then straddles his hips. He's about to reach under the hem of Gibbs' shirt when the older man stops him with a hand around his wrist.
Gibbs realizes that Tony thinks he doesn't want this, so he cranes his neck and quickly kisses the younger man again.
"Hey, I want this too, okay? I just want to do this properly."
He leads Tony up the stairs to the master bedroom. He slowly undresses the Italian and takes in the golden skin that's revealed by every piece of clothing he takes off. Suddenly, when he's only wearing his boxers and Gibbs is still wearing everything, Tony seems to come to life. He surges forward and captures Gibbs' lips in a hungry kiss, only breaking it to force his shirt over his head and then his lips are back, warm and inviting. He blindly reaches down to unzip the older man's jeans as he nibbles on an earlobe and licks the pulse point where Gibbs' shoulder and neck meet. The older man can't suppress a breathy moan and it only seems to encourage Tony further.
Gibbs is quickly becoming hard and when Tony rakes his fingertips over the growing bulge in his boxers, he arches into the touch. Tony only smiles in return, a real smile, and gives Gibbs a small push until the older man's knees hit the edge of the bed and he falls down, bouncing up from the impact on the mattress. Tony is still standing there by the bed, looking at him like a hungry animal and Gibbs arches up from the bed, trying to get closer to his body warmth. Tony gladly grants his wish and crawls on top of him, his muscled, slender limbs seem to surround Gibbs and he easily gives in to the urge to kiss the man again.
Tony's lips travel from Gibbs' mouth to his cheek, his jaw line, over his neck where he gently bites the soft flesh and then licks it, earning a full body shiver from the silver haired man. By the time he's softly biting a hard nipple and his hand massages the inside of Gibbs' thighs, the older man is breathing loudly and he's grabbed a fistful of bedcover to keep from tugging at Tony's hair.
The younger man ignores him and moves even lower, following the path of soft hairs until his lips finally find the soft flesh of Gibbs' cock and the older man lets out a soft cry when he finally engulfs his aching member. Tony swirls his tongue around the tip and licks the slit before taking in more. He sucks hard and then looks up through his lashes, enjoying Gibbs' sharp intake of breath. One hand keeps stroking the other man's leg and the other comes up to roll his balls between his fingers. Gibbs bucks up and Tony lets him, taking in even more of his hard cock until he reaches the base. He sucks again and Gibbs gives a sharp tug at his hair, forcing him to back off.
The Italian looks up at the man lying under him and his own cock twitches at the sight. The older man's eyes are glazed over, his pupils dilated until there's only the smallest hint of blue still visible. He's panting, cheeks flushed, chest rising and falling with labored breaths and his cockhead is almost purple from the tension coursing through his veins. But most of all, he loves the way the older man arches his back, wanting, accepting everything Tony wants to give him.
Their eyes meet and Gibbs reaches up to pull Tony down. The kiss is lazy and they spend uncountable minutes exploring each other's mouths, licking and biting playfully.
"God. You're so beautiful." Tony whispers when he lets his eyes roam over the other man's body.
Tony grins broadly. "Wow, Leroy Jethro Gibbs says please!", and then, closer to his ear, in a husky whisper: "Please, what?"
"Make love to me." Gibbs whispers back, watching how Tony's eyes flutter closed for an instant at the overwhelming emotion.
The younger man backs off a little and looks around the room in search for something. Gibbs nods in the general direction of the nightstand and Tony reaches inside, retrieving lube and a condom. Gibbs takes the condom out of his hand and flings it across the room, out of sight. He smiles at Tony's raised eyebrow.
"We just had our check-ups. You're clean, I'm clean, and as far as I'm concerned I'm never touching anyone else so we don't need condoms."
Tony smiles back at him, playfully biting his bottom lip.
"Ooh, bossy, I like that."
Tony twists the cap off the bottle and squirts a generous amount of lube onto his fingers. He pushes Gibbs' legs further apart and the other man's breath hitches in anticipation. Tony rubs a slick finger around his hole and goes back to licking up Gibbs' erection. Then he gradually slips one finger and then two into his tight opening, gently massaging and opening him until Gibbs is meeting his thrusts with his own. Tony can only stare at him in amazement and strokes his own cock a few times. Then he licks Gibbs' cock one more time before he moves to sit between the other man's legs. He lifts Gibbs' knees and guides the tip of his cock to the older man's hole. He pushes slowly until the head slips in and they both release a labored breath.
His fingertips dig into the flesh of Gibbs' thighs and he takes the other man's cock in one hand, starting to stroke him in a rapid pace and slowly entering him at the same time. Gibbs' brain short-circuits from the overflow of delicious friction and he closes his eyes when Tony bottoms out and lets out a dirty moan.
"Fuck", the younger man breathes, "you feel so good."
He strokes Gibbs' cock even faster and just when the slow burn of his orgasm starts building in the older man's belly, Tony slows down until the feeling subsides again. His hips move, he pulls out of him almost entirely and then pushes back in, in one fluid move. Gibbs tosses his head back against the mattress and he moans loudly when Tony changes the angle, enters him again and the head of his cock rubs against his prostate. Tony chuckles and slams back in, going harder and faster now. his balls slap against Gibbs' ass and the younger man hits his prostate with every single thrust.
The Italian takes his cock into his hand again and rubs a thumb across the tip, smearing the pre cum gathered there over his shaft. He pumps him in a tight fist and once again, the orgasm slowly builds until he's almost at the edge and there's no going back and – Tony stops.
Gibbs is panting at this point and he almost begs the younger man to make him come. Tony seems to read his mind and he picks up the pace of his thrusts again, moving in accord with the tight fist around his cock.
"I love you, so much", he breathes as he moves faster, pumping his cock and hitting his prostate and finally, finally, Gibbs tips over the edge. He cries out as Tony keeps stroking him through his orgasm, milking him until every last drop of cum is sprayed over his chest and the younger man's hand. Tony grunts, moves in and out of him a couple more times before slamming back in and juts his hips, trying to prolong his orgasm. He nearly howls in pleasure as he shoots his load deep into Gibbs' ass and, with whatever presence of mind the younger man has left, pulls out of his body and collapses on the mattress next to him.
they lie there together, panting until their breathing finally slows down. Then they look at each other and both burst out laughing.
"Seriously, that was…"
"Amazing. We're never leaving this bed."
Tony picks up his shirt and sloppily cleans off Gibbs' chest before he lays down on top of him, entangling their legs and sighing happily.
Suddenly Gibbs pushes himself upright and looks around the room. He picks up his jeans, feels the pockets and then takes out his phone. After searching the right application for five whole minutes, he finally finds the button for his camera and, with one hand, snaps a picture of them while he presses a kiss against Tony's shoulder.
The younger man is openly staring at him and seems at a loss for words.
"Did you just… snap a picture of us with your phone?"
Gibbs nods and then a sly smirk covers his features.
"Abby explained this S&M-thing to me, or whatever it's called when you send a picture to another phone."
Tony bursts out laughing and presses a kiss against Jethro's lips. Then the older man gives him his phone and lies back down.
"Now you just have to type in your father's number."
The End! Please let me know what you think! :) X