conker quest, tale of bardoc

ZT96: hi there, this is the day after conkers bad fur day, and my tale of how berri comes back, so enjoy my style, you'll laugh, you'll cr-( conker enters)

Conker: quit rambling, jackass

ZT96:shut it conker, im trying to do an intro

Conker: we are ready, mr. intro

ZT96:fine, whatever, i own nothing exept my oc's

Conker:will you please shut up and let us start

ZT96:ok fine


ZT96:we start at the cock & plunker (is it realy the only bar)with conker at the bar table as the buff bar tender walks up (i'll call him BT, because who knows his real fucking name)

BT:what'll it be

Conker:scotch, singal malt, spey side, no ice

BT:ah, a man of taste(pours drink) there you go

Conker:whoa, cowboy, keep it coming(BT keeps pouring)and leave the bottle

BT:you look a bit down, whats the matter

Conker:you'll never beleave the day ive had, besides,i dont want to talk about it (motions to glass) i'll just drink this

ZT96:outside the door,conker exits drunk as hell

Conker:im serious, do you ever shut up

ZT96:i thought that youve been in enoughf fanfics before to know NOT TO BREAK 4TH WALL!

Conker:2 things, 1st i do it all the time, and 2nd when im drunk, when has a stupid wall stoped me (it starts to rain)oh, i get it, this is for breaking your wall

ZT96:no this rain is in the story,this is for breaking 4th wall (Conker is struck by lightning)

Conker: OW! (falls to ash, wines up in the underworld,gregg enters)

Gregg:ok get up, you bloody prick

Conker:oh shit

Gregg:oh no, you again, how did you die this time, mate

Conker:lightning

Gregg: broke 4th wall again, idiot, looks to me you still have 3 lives left, so go on up, bloody prick,as for me, i have cats to see (a skeliton hand takes Conker and drops him in Birdy's feald)

Birdy: hey Conker, got any metipox

Conker: WHAT?

Birdy: doesnt mater, oh meet bardoc 9 motions toward a red dragon that has on a sain fusion outfit (sorry for the dragon ball Z reffrence)

Conker: hi there (bardoc snuffs him) not the talkitive type, are we

Bardoc: lets go (leaves)

Birdy: you might want to go catch up to him

Conker: right (runs after bardoc


ZT96: that was chapter one and i am joined by the dead, or who everyone thinks is dead, berri

Berri: thanks ZT, i will make an apperanse very soon so keep reading

ZT96:thank you and good night