It had been a week I'd talked to Constance about … My, hmm, my problem. I hadn't work it out yet. Don't know how. Yeah, I had no idea how to deal with it. I obviously couldn't tell anyone. I didn't trust the Billings girls for this, and I was pretty sure to be right about this.
Thomas was avoiding me. I wasn't hanging out with Josh anymore because he was with Thomas all the time. By the way; Thomas looked like depressed. But when he was seeing me, he always managed it to have a girl by his side to let me know he was so over me. I admitted it, I was jealous, so jealous, but I didn't say a word. What could I say anyway? Nothing.
Days went by, and I soon realized that if I didn't make a decision soon it would be too late for me to have an abortion.
One night, I talked with Constance about it, "Constance… You … Can you come with me tomorrow to the drug store?" I asked her.
"Sure," she answered, not looking at me.
"I will go buy the P test," I told her, apprehending her reaction when she would realize I hadn't do a damn thing about my problem.
She nodded. She was distracted by this guy she was chatting with, Witt. "Okay, Reed I'll go with you," she assured.
I sat on my bed, waiting for her to realize what I just had said. "And I might tell Dash," I added.
As I knew she would do, she suddenly stopped typing on the keyboard and looked at me with big eyes. She was like "no you didn't do this". I half-smiled when she opened the mouth, "What? You and… I thought it was with …" She couldn't even finish her sentences.
"Dash. Thomas. You can say their names," I said, sarcastic.
She made a poor smile, "You slept with Dash?" she asked. She knew exactly what I was destined to if I had done this. She knew Noelle would've kill me. But her eyes weren't suspicious. They were more curious than anything else.
"No, I didn't. It was just to catch your attention," I laughed.
Her laugh joined mine, "You scared me," she told me.
I shrugged. "No, seriously I might tell Thomas. About… You know," I explained. "I think he has the right to know that I'm gonna have an abortion."
Constance sighed and looked at me, "You really don't wanna keep the baby?" she asked.
I looked at her in a weird way and frowned. Keep the baby? Was she insane?
"Constance I'm fifteen. I won't keep a baby!" I yelled.
"I was just saying," she whispered.
I sighed, "Doesn't matter."
She looked at me in the eyes, completely attentive to me and not to her keyboard or her computer screen. "You should tell him. Right now before you chicken up," she advised me.
I nodded. She was right. I looked at the clock fixed on the wall. It was seven. Perfect time to go to Ketlar. But I didn't know if I wanted to. I took a deep breath. I had to do it. You have to, I kept telling myself.
"Okay, I'll go," I said. I got up and walked to the door, "Wish me good luck!"
"Good luck," she said with a nice smile.
I got out of my house and walked straight to Ketlar. Almost nobody was outside, it was study time. As usual, some guys were messing here and there with some girlie girls.
When I got into Ketlar, no one stopped me. The guys were all looking at me like I was insane. I caught one of them looking at my stomach, or was it a way lower? Or higher? Anyway I immediately put my hands on my belly thinking it might looked filled. I walked straight to Thomas's room, ignoring things some voices had said.
I knocked at his door. Josh opened it after a few seconds. He seemed to be surprised I was here. He looked uncomfortable.
"Can I talk to Thomas?" I asked him without saying hi.
"He ain't here," Josh answered. He looked sorry for me, and I started to feel suspicious about Thomas being outside his room.
"Tell him I stopped by, will ya? I need to talk to him," I explained to Josh.
He nodded, "Sure I will," he promised.
My turn to nodded. I smiled a little at Josh. I didn't know what to say to him. Like I knew it was being uncomfortable and awkward between us, and I didn't know how to forget the past.
"Then, have fun studying," I said as a goodbye.
He smiled, "You too. Good night, Reed."
"Good night, Josh," I whispered before walking away. I didn't hear his door closing right away so I wondered if he was looking at me. I turned myself, and he was. He was looking at me with this thing in the eyes I didn't like. With this adoration… Like he liked me or something.
I turned away and walked out Ketlar. While I was walking, I got near to Dreck, and I heard voices. I was sure I recognized Thomas's. He was with another girl… It felt like my heart was ripping all over again. It broke again. I was feeling so bad and jealous. I didn't even care about being silent or not. I wanted him to notice I was there. That I heard. I just wanted to see his face so I could hit him. Hot rage rose inside of me. I needed to hit something like I never did before.
"Who's there?" a voice asked.
When I recognized the voice, I thought I would never believe it. I couldn't believe it. It wasn't supposed to be true. I didn't move. I didn't even talk. I couldn't. I just stayed there until they both came out of the old building. When I saw them together holding hands, I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to yelled, to scream, to hit him so bad to make me feel like this. I felt like crap. How could he do this to me? They were holding hands but her face looked way happier than his. His look was dead. And maybe that was where I found the strength to smile.
"Oh, Reed," Thomas whispered like a kid caught doing something bad.
I felt like he tried to freed his hand but she didn't let him. She made me that hypocrite smile I had always hated. I really did hate her right now. She had no rights to do this. Thomas was mine. She couldn't take him. Remember you broke up with him. Oh shut up you voices. The moment was so awkward that I decided to leave.
"Thomas, Josh will tell you something," I told him. "Listen to him, please. It's important."
He nodded, "Is there something wrong?" he asked with this worry tone. I loved when he took that tone. It meant he cared…
"I just need to talk to you."
"Thomas, you coming?" she asked.
He looked at her and his look was so cold that I would've backed off immediately. "Go, I'll catch you up later," he told her.
She frowned and winced. I knew how she felt. I never thought she was on him like this. She looked at me and made me a winner smile, "Good night, Reed." The way she said my name was almost mean.
"Bye, Ariana," Thomas said, coldly.
Ariana Osgood and Thomas Pearson were really having a story.
Thank you, billings girl, for reviewing last chapter! Hope you liked it!