Title: The Replacement

Author: Wisiaden

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the DC universe.

Rating: T

Summary: In a world where Tim fails to clone Kon, and Kon never returns, Lex Luthor does the unthinkable. Loosely based on astolat's Reconcilable Differences/Lazarus. [One-shot, silly]

Pairings: N/A

Warnings: None

Author's Note: Really strange idea I got after reading astolat's Reconcilable Differences and the Lazarus piece. Don't know what I'm thinking, but I thought I'll give it a try. Although, right now, it's probably more cracky than anything else. Maybe when I'm less out of it, I'll try and write a more serious version.


Lex surveyed the burnt lab with a critical eye. He knew it was frustrating. Hell, it was frustrating him. That after so many attempts, they still couldn't clone Kon. But it didn't mean that Tim had to set fire to the lab. He wondered how Cadmus had done it, or were they just lucky? Lex sighed, took out his cell and dialed a number for a clean up crew. He was going to be replacing another lab. Those things were expensive (even if he had the money to spare).

It wasn't till later that night, sleeping next to Clark (Clark who didn't know anything at all about his attempts) that Lex had a crazy idea. Granted, most of his ideas where, but who was he if he didn't act on it?


Conner Kent wasn't having a very good day. He was late for work (he had forgotten to set his alarm clock), he skipped breakfast (because he was late), and he didn't get to eat lunch either (because he had to work through his lunch to make up for the work he didn't do since he was late), and then he missed the last bus to get home. He had checked his cell which had several angry messages from his aunt, uncle and cousin about some event while he walked home. There was a bright flash of light, and he got knocked out. Then, he woke up. And now, he was staring at the man that was Lex Luthor with disbelief. At least, Conner thought gratefully, he got to eat dinner before all this happened.

"Please tell me this is a dream," Conner said. He blinked several times and pinched himself. It didn't work. Luthor was smiling at him. In a really creepy way.

"No, this isn't a dream," Luthor said. He waved a hand, gesturing to the lab. "This is all real."

Conner still didn't quite believe it. For all he knew, this man could just be a crazy comic fanatic, who for god knows why kidnapped him. He asked that: "Are you sure you don't need help? I can take you to…uh…place for you to meet all the…oh, you can meet Superman there!"

That was the best thing to do. Take this crazy maniac to the nearest psychiatric ward, and get home. He hoped he won't be late for work tomorrow morning. Lex Luthor glared at him.

"This isn't a dream, and I'm not crazy."

"Where's your proof?" Conner finally asked after a bout of silence. He wasn't stupid. Luthor looked exasperated.

"Why don't you take a look around?"

And Conner did. He studied the lab. It was wide and large. He wandered over to the giant computer and was taken back by how sophisticated the equipment was. Then, after one giant circuit, Conner finally made his way back to where he started. This time, he stared.

The platform where he stood had four long poles, blocking out a square. Each pole had a round glass top shaped like a globe, and Conner could only guess that was where the energy was contained when it was turned on. Conner sighed. It really wasn't a good day. He turned back to Luthor.

"All right. Why am I here? Why did you drag me from my world to your world?"

This was extremely crazy, Conner thought. He was actually in the DC universe if he could believe it.

"My son died, and I want you to replace him. You are his counterpart," Luthor said. Conner gaped. "Are you serious?"

"No, why else would I build a machine and drag you here?"

Conner groaned. Then, he thought he was actually taking this pretty well. Then again, that's probably because he had a bad day and that usually evens everything out.

"And why the hell would I do that? There's no way I can be your son's counterpart! Send me home now!"

Luthor patiently asked, "Tell me. What's your name?"

Conner eyed him suspiciously, "It's Conner,"—and then because he thought it didn't matter much, he added his last name—"Conner Kent. I don't have a middle name."

His friends often teased him about that, nicknaming him Superboy after the comics. Luthor grinned at his words, and that really chilled Conner. He didn't remember if there were many issues where Luthor actually smiled. Though, it was kind of interesting to see a comic character as a real life person.

"There we go! Conner Kent – Kon-el—Superboy, you work."

Conner seriously couldn't believe this. Just because he had the same name didn't mean a thing. He didn't even remotely look like the comic book character!

"Yes, you do," Luthor disagreed. Oh, Conner blushed. He said that out loud.

"You don't have as big of a built. And it doesn't seem like you have any power—I tested out some kryptonite on you while you were still unconscious—but despite your scrawniness, your personality and action are similar. You'll make a splendid second son."

Conner really wished this was a dream.