She watched him. More than anyone thought she had.

Petunia Dursley remembers grasping the little baby in her arms. She read the letter attached to his bundle. For Petunia, she'll always remember Harry Potter's delivery meaning something else-

That somewhere, Lily Evans was dead..

When the letters from that..that place started piling through every crack in her ordinary, neat house she didn't know what to say. Her emotions were incomphrehensible. All she can really remember, admist the chaos, was looking up at the ceiling at the thousand letters flooding to the ground. Why?

No one had ever wanted her attention this much..

When he was eleven, his birthday. She hadn't forgotten. Petunia was red in the face as she explained the story, the true story of his mother and father. She had never, ever gotten that upset. And as Harry glared up at her, all the anger he had ever felt for her seem to gleam through his eyes -

Lily's eyes.

Petunia, she felt a pang of guilt. She should've told him the truth. Then..Then maybe he would've looked at her with such distain..

Then when Harry was twelve, and the bars in his windows were nearly blown off. Vernon and Dudly panicked and ran into the room, frozen on the spot as they saw Harry desperatly hanging out the window and into a floating car. Vernon trying to pull him back into the house, but was outdone.

While Vernon was shouting horrible nothings, all Petunia could do was look out into the night sky while Harry and his friends flew away. She could hear him laughing. And she watched, and watched and watched.. She then finally looked down sadly.

She never had friends like that..

Then he was thirteen, she couldn't move as she saw Aunt Marge slowly explanding and fly out the door like a very livid air ballon. Petunia watched as Vernon and Harry spat, Harry grabbed his suitcase from Dudly's room that they had given to him, and stormed to the door. She didn't understand, but.. Something in her wanted him to stay.

She didn't want him to get hurt..

The fireplace was obliverated, Vernon had not even given into his normal angry outbursts yet as he stared mindlessly at the destroyed fireplace. Petunia knew, Harry was going to some cup games.. She remembers him smiling with joy as he and some man named Mr. Weasley disappeared with no explaination.

And as mad as Petunia was for the money that would be invested in the fireplace, she couldn't help but be just the slightest bit happy for her nephew..

Harry was fifteen, Petunia nearly screamed, her Dudly was hurt! She remembers scurrying to get him. Everything that happend that particular evening was rather fast, constant letters for Harry, Vernon shouting over and over about the owl's that continued to flood the living room. The suddenly Harry was expelled from that school. And then something happend Petunia would've never expected of her.

"And what in the bloody hell is Azkaban?" Vernon shouted, barley gripping of anything his nephew had just told him.

"It's the wizarding prison."

The words just burst forth from her mouth without any stop, Petunia wasn't even sure she had spoken them until Vernon's eyes popped open and his head snapped in her direction on the couch.

But Petunia's eyes were stiched on Harry, who was equally surprised by her knowledge of his world. The wonder on his face almost made her want to laugh. Maybe they could discuss his world..

No! She thought, pulling away from his gaze. They will never talked about the "M" word, it was forbidden in her house. Because it was wrong, immoral, unatural.

Just wrong..

Petunia would also remember when he got home at the end of that year. They had been unable to pick him up that time, not like the Dursleys were always able to. She remembers when he closed the front door behind him, Harry looked up at her, his beautiful green eyes sharp. She remembers being rooted to the spot as she heard Harry lock the door behind him. His eyes never left her.

And then finally, he began making his way up the stairs. That was probably the most civil time they had ever spent together. And Petunia truly regrets that, she truly did.

And.. She also recalls how Harry never mentions that Sirius uncle of his, whom Harry once would threaten and scare them with, ever again.

Petunia knew fully well that he was sixteen, soon to be seventeen. And as the white-bearded man that came to her door had said, that Harry would soon be a man in the "M" word's world. Petunia, as she sat there, while the man told them (preferably her) that Harry should've been taken care of, treated like one of their own. And he was not. And then he (Apparently his name was Dumbledore, what a strange world Harry's was..) insulted Dudly, said they had damaged him.

And then Petunia pretended not to notice, to not realize that it might've been true.

Everyone is surprised that Petunia knows how old he is, Dumbledore stood there for a moment. Looking back at Petunia with a blank expression, and she looks back knows, of course he knows.

That somewhere under that shell of pain she lives behind, she cares. If not only a little.

And then his last year with them, Petunia had never seen Harry so fully grown. So mature -

So sad.

She stays rooted at the door, staring back at Harry. Harry himself looks at her, almost hopefully, that she'll say something before they both depart.

So many words Petunia wants to say, like:

I'm sorry

Come with us

What will happen to you?

Will I see you again?

Be safe

I love you..

But, despite all the words threatning to come through. Petunia simply turns back, and leaves.

And Petunia wonders if he ever was disappointed in her because of that..

And now, Petunia, an old woman. Rocked back and forth in her wooden chair, knitting a kitten pattern. The mail should be coming soon..

Harry had his own family, though she's never seen them. Two boys and a girl, one named after Lily.. Her Dudly is talking to the family, but Petunia and Harry remain hopelessly at odds. At this thought, Petunia's eyebrow twitches.

She was expecting the mailman that day, as she sits back. She suddenly hears wind being swirved, and a hoot.

Petunia opens her eyes, only to meet eyes with a brown barn owl.

Instead of screaming, or shrieking like she might've done in her younger years, she simply takes the little letter from the owl's foot when said owl holds up his foot. She unties the letter Now fully interested, Petunia sits there, opening the letter, and reading the insides.

"Dear Aunt Petunia,

Although it is unbeliveable, I have taken fourteen years to actually write this. I'll be there on friday to have tea, maybe we can just talk for the evening.

By the way, I think I finally know what you tried to tell me when I left all those years ago.

I love you too, crazy as it sounds.

And, I forgive you.

Love, Harry Potter."

Petunia sits there in plain silence, not even noticing the owl's disappearance.

She smiles, so he'll be there on friday, hm?

Petunia closes the letter.

"Petunia?" Vernon calls, strolling into the living room. "Are you alright?

She looks to him, still smiling.

"Yes," She says. Years of guilt finally evaporating from her chest. "Everything is fine."

~o~

Although I always thought Vernon and Harry becoming civil with each other was impossible, I kinda think that Petunia would be convinced if Harry persuaded enough. He had never really gotten into any real arguments with her. I do think Petunia was always jealous, but admist the jealously there was always some maternal love, because of Lily.

Hope you enjoyed it~ Review and Message!