So…I know I haven't updated any of my multi-chapters in a really, really long time, but I just had to write this after "Dance With Somebody". There was just too much Kum Hevans and Bike Chanderson Bromance to resist.
Kurt walked into the kitchen, setting his "between the sheets" shopping bag on the counter and stepping over to open the fridge.
"Hey," Sam said, coming into the room.
Kurt glanced over his shoulder as Sam came to meet him at the fridge. He playfully shoved him out of the way to peer inside.
"I'm starving. What's for dinner?"
Kurt laughed brightly as he gave Sam a shove of his own. "Get out of my way."
Sam lifted his arm and effortlessly got Kurt in a head lock. With his free hand, Sam managed to remove two Diet Cokes from the fridge. One thing he and Kurt had bonded over since he moved into the Hudson-Hummel residence back in December was their consciousness of caloric intake.
"Was this what you were going in there for?" Sam grinned, setting Kurt free and handing him one of the cans.
Kurt smiled quietly. "Thank you," He said.
They popped their tabs in unison and bumped their cans together before taking a sip.
"Is Finn home?" Kurt asked casually, glancing around the kitchen. "It's his turn for dinner." With Carole with Burt in Washington during the week, the three boys had been taking turns preparing meals.
"He went to Rachel's," Sam broke the news.
"You have got to be kidding me," Kurt rolled his eyes. "That boy would do anything to get out of cooking."
"We've lucked out," Sam laughed. "I wasn't about to endure another night of hot pockets."
"I'd prefer that to your…boiled chicken and brown rice." Kurt crinkled his nose in disgust. "Honestly, Sam. It is monumentally depressing that no one ever taught you that a meal can be nutritious and flavorful at the same time."
"Whatever," Sam sighed. "I'm feeling like a binge. Can we, just, like, order deep dish and call it a night?"
"You read my mind." Kurt sighed, starting towards the doorway. "You call. I'm going to go change into sweats."
"Let me use your phone," Sam said, holding out his hand. "You have the number to Giordano's programmed, don't you?"
Kurt nodded boredly, handing over his phone quickly before exiting.
Same looked down at Kurt's screen. He hadn't intended on reading Kurt's texts, but Kurt had left a conversation up.
"Hey, it's Chandler from the music store. Texting you so you'll have my number if you need it ;)…"
A goofy grin came over Sam's face. He looked at the bag Kurt had left on the counter. He had just come home from the music store. He looked back to the phone and read Kurt's response.
"Cool! Thanks. It's definitely good to have :P."
Chandler had replied, "So, I meant to ask you: did it hurt?"
"Excuse me?" Kurt had asked.
"…When you fell from heaven ;)"
Sam laughed out loud, clapping a hand over his mouth. He had to admit, he loved pick up lines. Aside from doing impressions of famous people, coming up with pick up lines was what he did best. Sam felt sorry for this Chandler kid, whoever he was. Not only did he seem blissfully un aware that Kurt was taken, he was also using one of the lamest, most overused lines in the book. Sam knew he could give the guy a run for his money. Without really thinking what he was doing, he started typing a reply.
"I think you dropped something back at the store," His heart raced as he guiltily hit send. Sure, it was bad, but Kurt had changed his Facebook status to something like "Oh no, I scratched my favorite Cher CD" enough times for him to consider it payback.
"Oh no! What did I drop?" Chandler asked, probably legitimately concerned.
"My jaw," Sam typed, cackling.
Kurt re-entered the room, a look of horror coming over his face. "What are you doing? I thought you were ordering Pizza."
Sam laughed and dodged Kurt as he lunged toward him. "I'm just educating this guy, Chandler."
"Oh no," Kurt panicked. "What did you say?
"Well, I should have told him you have a boyfriend," Sam shrugged, jumping around the island, and using it as a barrier between him and the other boy. "But I realized that wouldn't be half as fun."
Kurt finally came around and jumped on Sam. After a long struggle, he finally pried his phone away and looked at the conversation. Color rushed to his face.
"Sam!" He cried. "Why did you say that?"
"Because, it's fucking hilarious," Sam shot back nonchalantly.
"He's going to think I'm interested in him now!" Kurt cried.
"So? Tell him the truth," Sam suggested simply. "Tell him your loser best friend stole your phone."
Before Kurt could say anything back, his phone buzzed again. He looked down at it. "Oh. god…" He groaned.
Sam's eyes shined with excitement. "What does it say?"
"Would you calm the hell down," Kurt laughed. "It says 'that may or may not have been intentional', and then he did a wink face…"
"He likes you," Sam beamed stupidly.
"Shut up." Kurt rolled his eyes, going to type a reply.
"You better tell him you're not interested," Sam instructed. Kurt said nothing, continuing to type. "Well…is that what you're saying?"
Kurt sighed heavily, finally looking up from the screen. "Sure; something along those lines."
"And, what exactly falls along those lines?" Sam asked.
Kurt hesitated only briefly before mumbling out his reply, "I told him that I'm not a library book."
"So, he probably shouldn't be checking you out?" Sam nodded seriously, thoroughly understanding.
"Yes," Kurt tried his hardest to keep a straight face, but the two of them started laughing at once.
Sam reached out and patted Kurt on the shoulder. "This is why we're friends,"
Blaine and Mike sat on Blaine's bedroom floor, leaning against the bed with their books open in front of them. They had a big AP Chemistry test the next day, and had been studying since school let out.
Blaine tapped his pen against his text book, staring longingly at his phone.
"It's five-thirty already," He said darkly. "Let's say hypothetically you wanted to go music shopping? How long do you suppose it would take you?"
Mike sighed, loudly closing his own book. "You know… I could actually consider your question and provide a reasonable answer, but I know you well enough by now to save both of us some time and cut right to the chase. What's going on?"
"I told Kurt to text me when he was done shopping, but he didn't," Blaine sighed miserably.
"Well, maybe nothing interesting happened when he was shopping and he has nothing to text you about," Mike answered optimistically.
"He could still text me!" Blaine cried. "He could ask me how the studying is going or something!"
"He knows we're studying. He probably just doesn't want to bother you."
"Maybe I want him to bother me," Blaine mumbled.
"Maybe if it matters so much to you, you should text him," Mike said rationally. "Maybe he's waiting by the phone."
"I doubt it," Blaine crossed his arms, slouching bitterly. "He's probably practicing his audition and ignoring the fact that I even exist."
"It must get pretty confusing," Mike contemplated, "I mean, traditionally, the guy is supposed to call the girl. But, there's no girl here. Doesn't that mean you should both be reaching for the phone?"
"I don't know, Mike," Blaine snapped. "I wish there was a gay handbook for these kinds of things, but unfortunately, there isn't!"
"Hey. It's just a question," Mike said, holding his hands up defensively.
"Sorry. You're good," Blaine shook his head. "It's just that, you and Tina have talked about it, right? You're staying together when you go away. Kurt and I haven't had that conversation yet. What if he thinks we're breaking up when he goes to school?"
"Dude, I don't know." Mike shrugged. "You need to talk about this with him."
Blaine sighed. "I know. It's just hard."
Mike gave Blaine a comforting pat on the shoulder. "It's okay, bro. You'll figure it out eventually. For now, let's focus on the elements."
Blaine nodded and went back to his text book. The periodic table was actually a great distraction.
Later that week, Kurt found himself rushing into the choir room. Sam was there already, sitting in his chair on the risers. Blaine, fortunately, hadn't yet shown up.
"Okay, so, I did something stupid," Kurt said in a hushed tone. He sprinted up the risers and quickly pulled a chair up next to Sam's, falling into it and yanking his phone out of his pocket. "He asked what I was wearing today,"
Sam's eyes widened. Kurt had been keeping him up to date on the texts since they started. He was starting to enjoy them even more than Kurt was. "That's really not appropriate at all." He joked.
"He liked my outfit when we met. It's not that weird. But...I made it weird. I couldn't help myself."
He took Kurt's phone and read the reply. He had originally just sent, "A blue and beige sports jacket," But moments later, he'd added, "And nothing else."
"Kurt!" Sam cried. "Kurt, you're full blown sexting him now! Do you realize that?"
Kurt groaned. "I just wanted to see what he would say…"
The other choir members were starting to take their seats around them, and they leaned in closer to each other to talk quietly, and keep their conversation private.
"Oh my god," Sam chuckled. "I can't even handle this."
"Hey, Kurt," Blaine's voice caused both of them to jump. Kurt turned around to see Blaine sitting down in a seat a few feet away.
"Hey, sweet heart," Kurt said nervously. "Pull your chair up. Come sit closer to me,"
"Um, I think Rachel said they needed an aisle for their number," Blaine told him weakly. "Besides, it looks like you two are…talking…"
Kurt turned away, frowning. Blaine had been acting so weird lately. He was done fighting for his attention. Besides, part of him was relieved that Blaine wouldn't be breathing down his neck when Chandler finally replied to his boldest text yet.
Santana and Rachel began singing one of his favorite Whitney songs, "So Emotional". As much as he wanted to just sit back and enjoy the performance, all he could think about was his phone burning a hole in his pocket. He was thrilled when it finally started vibrating.
"I'm pretty sure you were Cleopatra in another life. You've got a great asp!"
Kurt's eyes practically bulged out of his head, and he threw a hand over his mouth. He'd seen Shakespeare's "Antony and Cleopatra" at the Lima playhouse the summer before, and knew that the asp was a kind of snake. He could only think of one thing that Chandler would compare to a snake. There was also the possibility that he was just trying to make a pun on the word "ass". Either way, it was an even better response than Kurt had expected.
He was so amused by the message, that he didn't even realize Sam reading over his shoulder. "Oh snap," Sam hissed in his ear. Kurt tried not to laugh too loud and disrupt the girls' performance.
"What's an asp?" Sam asked. Kurt nudged Sam in the ribs with his elbow, trying to shut him up so he could think of a reply.
"And like an asp, I'm dangerous. I'm so toxic; Brittney Spears was singing about me."
Chandler responded only moments later. "If I said I need your body now, would you hold it against me?"
Kurt grinned wickedly. "You could hit me, baby, as many times as you'd like."
Chandler said, "You seemed so tame at the music store, but I guess you're not that innocent."
Kurt laughed again as the song ended. He couldn't believe that he was having this conversation. Chandler was not only extremely clever, but he seemed to like Brittney Spears almost as much as Kurt did. Kurt knew he should cut it out, but the whole thing was too amusing to put an end to.
"What do you think Kurt and Sam were up to in rehearsal today?" Blaine asked Mike in the locker room the next afternoon. "They kept looking at his phone and laughing."
Mike rubbed his deodorant under his arms. "I don't know. They were probably just looking at memes or something."
"They wouldn't do that during a performance," Blaine said. "Kurt has better manners than that. Someone was texting him."
"Who…?" Mike asked. "Everyone he knows is in glee club."
"I mean… Yeah, he texts Dave Karofsky sometimes, but he Dave's privacy pretty seriously. I know Sam's one of his best friends, but there's something weird going on here. What would he be showing Sam that he wouldn't show me?"
"Maybe you should ask Kurt," Mike tried, being overly logical again.
"No," Blaine shook his head. "He'll think I'm being intrusive."
"Maybe you should ask Sam," Mike tried. He knew it would be easy enough to do, seeing how Sam had gym during the same period as they did that semester, and it would be easy to talk to him without Kurt stepping in.
"Sam hates me," Blaine reminded Mike. Suddenly, he thought of a solution. "Could you do it?"
"Go ask Sam."
Mike sighed heavily. "Fine, bro. But you owe me."
Mike closed his locker and started across the room. He made his way to the bay of sinks where Sam was standing in a towel, combing his hair in front of the mirror.
"Hey, what's up?" Mike said awkwardly.
Sam's brow furrowed. "Not much; just standing here half-naked. What's up with you?"
Mike sighed. "Look, man, Blaine's freaking out about Kurt and I'm really worried about him."
Sam kept on a poker face. "And how does this concern me?"
"I don't know. You guys live together. Maybe you could tell me if there's anything that Blaine should be worried about…"
Sam laughed. "What are we, twelve?"
"Come on, help a bro out."
Sam hesitated. "Look, I promised Kurt I wouldn't say anything."
Mike's face fell. "So, there's something to say!"
Sam panicked. "No. Look. That's not what I meant. I'm just…I'm more loyal to Kurt than I am to Blaine. I mean, wouldn't you protect the privacy of the guy who's always helped you through the tough stuff over helping out a guy who accused you of selling your body."
Mike was silent for a long moment, and then repeated, "So, there's something to say…"
"Just leave it alone, Mike," Sam warned. "Their relationship doesn't involve either of us."
Mike nodded, accepting this, then turned around and made his way back over to Blaine.
"Hey wouldn't tell me anything," Mike told him.
Blaine paused, trying to figure out what that meant. "I should be worried, shouldn't I?"
Mike nodded. "I think so. Maybe…"
Blaine had been telling himself all day to keep calm and trust his boyfriend. If Kurt had something to say to him, he would say it. He didn't want to jump to conclusions and accuse him of anything before he knew for a fact that something was wrong.
That's why he couldn't contain his curiosity when Kurt's phone started going off in his room that night. Kurt had left him alone while he got snacks, and Blaine found himself opening the new messages shamelessly.
"When we get to New York…" Were the first words he read. His stomach immediately clenched. It was bad enough that he couldn't go to New York with Kurt, but it hurt so badly to be reminded that people like Finn and Rachel got to go in his place. Suddenly, Blaine noticed that the name at the top of the screen wasn't Rachel's. It was Chandler's; a boy's name; a name Kurt had never mentioned; a name Kurt had kept from him.
Blaine's could hear his heart beat in his ears. All the air seemed to drain from the room, and he swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat. Something wasn't right.
He started scrolling through the conversation Kurt had been having with Chandler. It was endless. Suddenly, he stopped scrolling. "You could hit me, baby, as many times as many times as you'd like". What the hell? Blaine scrolled back down to the bottom. "Will you sing into my voicemail? I want to make your voice my ring tone." What the actual hell.
He couldn't believe it. All those months he'd spent drawing lines with Sebastian; all the time he'd spent convincing himself that his and Kurt's relationship was too strong to be imposed upon by outside parties; it was time spent lying to himself. He'd always known that if he'd wanted to, he could cheat on Kurt in a heartbeat. In a million years, he would have never thought that Kurt wouldn't be one hundred percent loyal. He didn't know how long Kurt had known this guy or what they'd done together. All he knew was that he'd been betrayed.
Sam was walking up the stairs to Hudson-Hummel's guest room, where he'd been staying, when he stopped in his tracks, realizing that there was yelling coming from ahead. It was instantly clear to him that Blaine had found out about Chandler. Sam felt a wave of guilt pass over him, feeling bad all of a sudden for encouraging everything that had happened. He felt extremely awkward, because he could tell that Kurt's door was open, and in order to get to his room, he'd have to walk past it.
The thing that really sucked was that five minutes ago, Sam had bumped into Kurt in the kitchen when he was making a sandwich. Kurt was preparing some gourmet cheese plate for his date, all excited to finally spend some time with his boyfriend. Sam could only imagine how Kurt was feeling now that everything good about the night had been sucked away.
"Do you know how many times I'd had to sit on a stool and watch you perform?" Kurt was shouting.
Suddenly, Sam noticed Finn poke his head out of his room. He looked around, his mouth hanging open in disbelief. He noticed Sam on the stairs. Sam waved at him awkwardly as he mouthed the words, "What's going on?" Sam shook his head, he wasn't about to speak up.
"Then talk to me! Tell me you're unhappy, but don't cheat on me!" The despair in Blaine's voice was heartbreaking. Finn looked horrified. Sam knew that he couldn't believe Kurt would cheat.
"I feel like I've taken crazy pills! I didn't cheat on you!" Kurt cried. "I'm really sorry if this made you upset, but its okay!"
What Blaine said next was too quiet for Sam to hear. The next thing they knew, Blaine was charging out into the hallway. Finn quickly ducked back into his room, but not before Blaine noticed him. Blaine angrily rolled his eyes as he started toward the stairs. Sam froze up, and came face to face with Kurt's angry boyfriend. Blaine glared at him.
"You knew about this, didn't you?" He snapped.
Sam was at a loss for words, and Blaine just shook his head, pushing past him on his way down.
Sam waited an appropriate number of seconds before going into Kurt's room. Kurt was sitting on his bed, looking confused.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Sam asked quietly. "I'm sorry if I had anything to do with this…"
Kurt shook his head. "He's being ridiculous," He shrugged. "There's nothing to talk about. Do you want some cheese?"
Sam timidly went over to the bed and set down next to Kurt, reaching for a slice of sharp cheddar. The two of them sat there and finished off the plate in silence.
Blaine sat in Kurt's driveway for twenty minutes, sobbing uncontrollably, paralyzed with grief. Finally, when he'd calmed down just enough to function, he picked up his phone and dialed the one person he could count on to be on his side.
"Mike, I need to come over,"
"You don't sound too good. Is everything okay?"
"Kurt cheated on me."
"That ass hole," Mike's voice got scarily low. "Yeah, come over."
Ten minutes later, Blaine was pacing around Mike's room while Mike just sat on the bed and watched him.
"Never in my entire life has anyone made me feel that shitty!" Blaine yelled. "He was like 'you don't know what it's like to date you when you're the alpha gay. Everyone loves you and you get more solos than I do'!"
"Did he seriously try to blame you?" Mike laughed angrily. "That's messed up. Can I hit him?"
"Please do." Blaine growled. "I almost threw up all over his precious rug. I should have. I should have just thrown up on everything he owns."
"Do you think he was lying?" Mike asked. "Do you really think it was just texting?"
"They'd only been texting for a few days, but who knows," Blaine said. "I mean, he compared it to what happened with Sebastian, but I never told Sebastian I was wearing a sports coat and nothing else. Kurt was egging this guy on. Even if it was just texting, I have a right to be mad, don't I?"
"Definitely," Mike nodded. "And I still want to hit him."
"Should I break up with him?" Blaine asked desperately.
"I don't know, I mean, if it was just texting that might be a little rash…" Mike reasoned.
"But I shouldn't just forgive him, though." Blaine decided. "He doesn't get forgiven. That's not how it works."
"So…what are you going to do?" Mike asked.
Blaine took a deep breath. "I'm going to call him out…in song…"
Blaine's performance of "It's not right, but it's okay" Really hit Kurt hard. He couldn't believe how badly he'd hurt Blaine. However, he wasn't ready to admit responsibility. He still thought Blaine was a hypocrite. The Sebastian situation turned out to be way more damaging, and Kurt had approached it with nothing but forgiveness.
Kurt decided to spend the rest of the evening organizing his room, hoping that he could take his mind off of the drama for a while. However, after his Dad came in and gave him a lecture about how nothing was ever going to be the same once he graduated, Blaine was all that Kurt could think about.
He'd dated Blaine for over a year. He pictured what would happen if they let Chandler come between them. All the good memories would be lost and all he'd remember about his final weeks of high school would be the horrible break up. He didn't just want good memories of high school, though. He wanted good memories for the rest of his life. He couldn't let Blaine break up with him. He had to do something.
First, he texted Chandler, "I should have been more up front from the beginning. I have a boyfriend, and these conversations aren't fair to him. I'm sorry if I led you on, but we shouldn't talk anymore."
Chandler never responded to him or argued, and Kurt was relieved.
Next, he went to knock on Sam's door.
"It's open!" Sam called lazily.
Kurt walked in to find Sam reading a comic book in bed. Kurt went and fell down next to him.
"I'm going to sing, 'I have nothing'." Kurt told him. "I'm going to make things right."
"…never heard of it," Sam said honestly. "Who sings it?"
Kurt blinked expressionlessly at Sam. "I can't even…"
Sam sighed. "You're going to make me listen to you practice, aren't you?"
Kurt nodded, patting Sam on the knee. "At least you have one thing right."
During Kurt's performance, Mike kept glancing back at Blaine to gauge his reaction. It was as if Mike was asking "What about now? Does he get forgiven now?" Blaine widened his eyes back at Mike, as if to say, "What are you looking at? I don't know. Don't rush my decision".
Kurt's performance was beautiful, and Blaine didn't know how to feel about it. He was still mad. He was beyond mad. He was especially mad that Kurt knew how to get to him; that he knew that a passionate performance would hit Blaine's soft spot and make him consider staying with him.
"I hate him," Blaine said to mike in the cafeteria the next day. "I love him, and I hate him, and I don't know what to do."
"I think he's really sorry," Mike said honestly. "I mean, it really was just a few text messages and some bad judgment. I don't think you should break up."
"Maybe it's for the best," Blaine mumbled. "He's just going to go off to New York anyway."
"It's your decision, bro," Mike told him. "I just don't want you to do something you regret."
Across the cafeteria, Kurt was ranting too. "That was…the most passionate song I had ever sung! Can you believe that he still hasn't talked to me yet?"
"Give it time to sink in," Mercedes told him. She and Sam were sitting shoulder to shoulder. Kurt was confused, because the two of them were always so secretive about whether or not they were actually together.
"I'm tired of this," Kurt shook his head. "I can't wait anymore. We're wasting so much time."
"You're right," Mercedes nodded. "Look at this: the glee club is sitting at two different tables at lunch. You guys have divided us."
"As if I didn't feel bad enough already," Kurt mumbled.
"Maybe you should go to Ms. Pillsbury," Mercedes suggested.
"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "That worked out so well for us."
Mercedes rolled her eyes, and nudged him cutely. "It worked out eventually."
Sam forced a smile at Kurt. "Yeah, maybe you should try it."
"You really think so?" Kurt asked.
Both of them nodded, and Kurt bit his lip thoughtfully. It was worth a shot.
By the end of the day, Kurt and Blaine had mended their relationship completely. After a much-needed coffee date, Kurt returned home. Sam was in the living room, eating cereal and watching cartoons. Kurt fell down next to him on the couch.
"You know what rocks?" Kurt asked. "Making out in the back seat of an SUV. Have you ever made out in the back seat of an SUV? It rocks."
"Well, I'd ask you what you've been up to this afternoon, but I have a pretty good idea."
Kurt sighed. "I'm happy."
Sam smirked. "I'm glad."
Kurt looked at the bowl in his hands. "It's your turn for dinner. Don't tell me that's it."
Sam grinned stupidly. "You have a choice between Special K and fruity pebbles."
Kurt shook his head and stood up. "I'm ordering Pizza again."
"I was hoping you'd say that."
As soon as Blaine got home, he texted Mike, "Everything's good."
Mike replied immediately, "Great. I knew it would turn out all right."
All Blaine sent back was, ":D"