Summary: The team needs a beautiful, blue-eyed brunette to go undercover and flirt their way into the heart of Jeffrey Montague, charity exploiter. Oh, and did they mention it had to be a guy?

Rated: T

This is a work in progress and may not be updated too frequently, so please be patient :) Thanks for reading, and reviews would be very lovely and inspiring.

Neal stood in front of the coffee machines early Monday morning, staring gloomily at the crust coating the insides of all the pots. Almost mournfully, he reached out slowly for the nearest pot, ready to pour himself a steaming mug of sludge and get to work on a hideously boring mortgage fraud case. His motions were cut off when a file was trust into his outstretched hand. Without a word he stuffed it under his arm and continued in his quest for crappy coffee.

"Morning, Peter. You're early."

"Yeah, well, I have to be. Hughes called me last night and said there was a serious case he needed us to work on. I spent three hours looking over the facts, and this one isn't gonna be easy."

"Are they ever?" Neal asked as the sludge poured into his cup. He added a bit of cream, something that he'd never done before coming to the Bureau; he learned quickly that black coffee in the outside world and black coffee at the Bureau were not the same things at all.

"Exploitation with an edge of violence. Lots of connections." Peter poured himself what was probably his second or third cup.


"You bet."

"Should be interesting. Conference room in five minutes?"

"Now we're talkin'." With that, Peter strode off toward his office to grab a few more files, Diana at his side with information of her own. Neal went back to his desk, closed the mortgage fraud case file, stashed it in the top drawer where he kept all unfinished cases, and headed up to the conference room. The usual team was starting to assemble and he took his seat toward the back, having the best view of the projector that was set up.

"Alright team, we have a very interesting and very important case on our hands, and we'll need all the best people working on this in order for everything to go smoothly. One slip up and it's our asses, and possibly our lives." Peter stared into the eyes of his entire team, sans Neal. He just knew Neal was giving him the 'Negative Nancy' look.

Diana clicked the remote and an image of a man in about his early thirties popped up. His short blond hair was gelled back and his piercing green eyes held an aggressive glint to them. He seemed a bit boyish and harmless, but Neal knew better than to assume strength by appearance. Hell, Diana was living proof that you didn't need to be huge and muscular to scare the shit out of people.

"This is Jeffrey Montague, owner of a popular but hushed dance club in lower Manhattan called The Viper's Pit. He's been on police radar before, but only for smaller crimes. Unpaid parking tickets, having the police called on his parties one too many times, that sort of thing. He also runs a non-profit organization called New Horizon. It's an educational program for elementary-aged children. Basically, parents send their children to the after-school program for two months. If, after two months, they see good results, they agree to make a donation. This donation is supposed to go back to the school, used for new books, supplies, and technology for the children. All the employees are volunteer teachers so none of the money should, in theory, go anywhere but to the children."

"He was brought to our attention about a week ago when one of his employees at the club suspected him of using New Horizon's donations to fund an expansion on the club."

"Who's our inside guy?" Neal asked. Diana slapped another file in front of him, this one just one sheet of paper.

"Carlito Del Rossey, full-time bartender and Montague's go-to guy whenever the club is having issues."

"What kind of issues?" Jones asked, picking up the photo of the attractive hispanic man, no older than twenty-four.

"Competitive issues," Diana said. She clicked another button and the screen changed to a building Neal was familiar with. "Club Victory, located across the street from the Viper's Pit. Much more spacious. In the beginning this wasn't an issue, because Montague wanted the Pit to stay under the radar. In recent months his customers have been leaving to his competition because the popularity of the club was growing, but not the architecture. It became too crowded and people started to get aggressive."

"So Montague needs the donations from his organization to expand the club, so that customers aren't driven away anymore." Jones spoke down at a file.

"Precisely," Peter nodded.

"Alright, if we know this, what's the hold up?"

"We can't prove it."

The room was filled with silence and Neal shook his head. So it was going to be one of those cases, then.

"And that's where the undercover part comes in, I assume." Neal gestured to the folder and looked back up at Peter.

"We need someone to get the attention of Montague in a...romantic way."

"I hope this isn't one of those date-the-person-and-then-run-while-they-try-to-kill-you cases."

"Not exactly. See, Montague has been known to fall for a pretty face quite a bit. So we tempt him with just that, someone who few people can resist, and then hopefully gain his confidence. Then we can get whatever evidence we need to connect the organization's missing donations to Montague's club, and we can nail him."

Neal nodded and leaned on his hand, staring expectantly at Peter.

"Oh, yes, he has a type!" Peter jumped a little. Neal could tell he was excited about this case. Anything was better than a mortgage fraud, as long as lives weren't on the line.

"That's what I was waiting for. I'm sure we have an agent somewhere around here who fits the bill."

"Oh, we do." Peter tried to hide his smile, for reasons unknown to Neal. Diana was definitely in on it, judging by the twitch of her lips. "He likes brunettes with blue eyes and unnatural beauty. And charm, of course."

"Excellent. Is there a racial preference?" Neal could tell Peter wasn't expecting that question.

"I don't believe so."

"Perfect! So we get Diana a pair of blue contacts and send her under."

Peter and Diana exchanged a look that Neal didn't quite understand.

"What? You said brunettes with unnatural beauty. I don't know about you, but I think Diana is very beautiful, and-"

"Caffrey, these are pictures of some of Montague's ex's." Diana slid another folder across the table and Neal opened it up immediately. The hand that had been absent-mindedly stroking his cheek fell onto the table with a loud thump and he stared at the pictures for a long few seconds before looking up.

"Or course, I should have known," Neal said. He smiled despite himself, entertained by how Peter and Diana had pulled this one over on him.

"Do you think it's possible?" Peter moved around the table to look down at the pictures with Neal-all brunettes, all with varying shades of blue eyes, and all beautiful beyond belief. Furthermore, all male.

"For me to flirt with guys?" Neal raised his eyebrows at Peter, who shrugged in response. "Peter, you wound me. I've got this in the bag! Consider this case closed."

"Alright," Peter said slowly, exchanging another look with Diana while Jones was smirking into his hand. "We'll set everything up. I want you back here in an hour on the dot to get wired up, understand?"

"Absolutely." Neal pulled his folders together and stood up, as did everyone else.

"And Neal-" The younger man spun around. "No anklet for this one," Peter said with a tilt of his head, a tilt that mean 'I'll be watching carefully'.

"Understood, Peter." Neal smiled his signature smile and left the room, heading toward the elevator. When he got outside he whipped his phone out and dialed a number without even thinking about it.

"Dare I say, problems with the Suit?" A voice answered, sounding amused.

"Moz, we have a problem. I have a problem."

Wow, this is actually pretty fun to write. Okay, I'm headed over to write the next chapter. Please review and tell me what you thought!