Author's Note: I am slightly appalled by the lack (well, ZERO amount) of fandoms about Angelfire. Well, anyways, I decided to write one to justify the magnificent trilogy by Courtney Allison Mourton. For whatever reason, I am really into the love triangle between Cadan, Will and Ellie. I know Will and Ellie will forever be the OTP of this series but I can't help but think that Cadan and Ellie need a little more scenes together, you know what I mean? It's like, Ellie knows she can't live without Cadan and Will but she's constantly pushing Cadan away! (Sorry, I get a little caught up in my drama about these three)

This is an AU version of 'Angelfire #2: Wings of the Wicked.' In this world, Cadan and Ellie get to spend more time together as ALMOST but not lovers. A little more than friendship for a little tease in their chemistry.

Author's Note 2: Oh, and btw, this is my first fanfiction kind and R&R. xx

Disclaimer: I do not own Angelfire. But if I did, I would totally put more sexy Cadan somewhere in these books.

A Certain Wanting

Fighting. Something I've never been able to escape; not even in my past lifetimes. It was a part of me. It seemed like violence and tragedy followed me around like shadow. Even in my dreams, I would envision myself in the middle of a battlefield. Blood. Massacre. Would any of these relentless visions stop?

This time, I'm in the dining room of my home. A sweet smell of pancakes fills my senses as I spot my mother bringing them out on a plate.

"Good morning, Ellie Bean! Come over here and eat your breakfast." My mother motions me to come sit with her. As I walk towards her, I feel a sudden darkness in my surroundings. Slowly I turn around and find myself face-to-face with a reaper the size of a truck. His hot breath blows on my face and I choke on the awful smell. I check on my mother and realize she's not there.

"Mom?" Panic shoots up my spine as I look around the house. Well, what remains of it. "MOM?" I yell once more.

"Ellie." Her eyes wide open with fright, she gasps as she is held into the clawed hands of the enormous reaper. Right now, I was too scared to even cry out.

I call on my swords and raise them towards the monster. "My dear Warrior. Do you believe you can save the people you love? You endanger them all by merely existing in that human body." And one twist, I hear a snap indicating that my mom was a goner. I opened my mouth to release a scream that wouldn't come; too shocked to process what just happened.

I woke up gasping for breath. Last night's nightmare was completely out of line. It wasn't real. It wasn't real. Again and again, I tell myself but uncertainty grasped the pit of my stomach. I ran out towards the bathroom and felt a twinge of pain as I threw up in the toilet. Ugh. That is just gross. A sense of nausea crept in and set me down on the tiled floor, gagging my lungs out after I pulled on the lever to flush.

"Ellie? Ellie, are you okay?" I heard Will come into the room and a pair of strong arms held me upright into a sitting position.

I couldn't open my eyes, afraid I'll throw up on Will. I managed to keep my eyes closed until he carried me and set me on the bed. I must look like a mess. I thought. Why couldn't he have seen me in a more...attractive state? Right now I have as much appeal as a sack of potatoes.

"Will. W-why are you here?" I blurted out, knowing it sounded silly. His hand wipes my clammy forehead and pulls the blanket up to my chin.

"Ellie." He traced his thumb along my cheek and kissed my forehead. I shivered at the contact of his skin.

I don't know what happened next but I suppose I dozed off into another terrifying oblivion. I wanted to tell Will to not let me fall asleep again, afraid of dreaming about my mother's death once more.

The second time I woke up, I felt a tad bit better than I did earlier. Though a little light-headed, I managed to stand up without tilting to the side and falling on the floor. A moan escaped my lips as my muscles were sore from moving. After a few minutes of constantly having to drag myself towards the bathroom, I finally reached my destination. I stared into the mirror, slightly horrified at my reflection. My hair looked like a haystack and my eyes looked like I've been watching a seven hour movie with my nose to the screen. I was a hideous mess.

Getting the tangles out of my hair was one thing and making it look like hair it was another. I wonder how my hair got into this state. Did I wrestle with my sheets last night? Did my pillows attack me while I was unconscious? God. And to think Will saw me like this. My eyes water as I yawn and stretch my limbs. It's odd how I always seem to make sex noises as I stretch. I shake off the thought and take a shower.

Okay, so maybe after the shower I didn't look so much like a woodland creature anymore. But I still felt like I've been running around the globe. I got dressed and headed out the house. As I opened the door a gust of icy wind greets me hello.

"So much for taking a warm shower." My teeth chatter and I feel Will's presence even before I see him.

"You've had quite a rough night."

I sigh, trying not to recall my nightmare. "Yeah."

"Are you okay?" His features are soft as he looks at me with concern. I nod and walk past him towards the car.

He runs his hand though his hair as he makes way to the driver's side.

The car ride was quiet though I was able to get a conversation flowing as we talked about who we were meeting with tonight. Marcus and Ava, he mentioned.

"Where will we go later?" I asked.

He shrugged. "You'll see."

"Are they Guardians like you are?

He shook his head. I thought he'd say something else but he still kept his eyes glued to the road. I took a deep breath and sighed. Only then did his eyes shift towards my direction.

"Is something bothering you?"

I set my hands down on my thighs. "Finally! You said a sentence containing more than two words." I rolled my eyes.

He laughed. "Sorry. I've been preoccupied. I was thinking about what happened to you last night. You looked terrible."

I glared at him and leaned against the car window. "Gee, thanks." I grumbled.

"I didn't mean it that way. You looked...sick. Did you have a bad dream?"

I nodded and told him about what happened. He listened and stayed silent. Once we arrived at Nathaniel's house, I continued to tell him about my nightmare. After I finished, he held my hand which sent a jolt up my arm and lingered on the back of my neck. I missed Will. I missed feeling his touch.

We sat on the couch and I sat close to him, leaning my head on his shoulder. With my forehead to his neck, and his arms wrapped around me, I felt safe. Secure. Loved. I felt him take a deep breath as I laid my hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.

I looked up at him and saw him smiling. His lips lightly pecked my mouth. I giggled and he kissed my cheeks, making me blush slightly as he slowly trailed down my neck with soft kisses.

I sighed as his arms went around my waist, pulling me flush against his body. My hands flew up to tangle in the soft dark hair at the base of his neck. For a while we stayed still, his head buried in my hair, inhaling my scent. Nothing could ruin this. Except for the fact that Nathaniel stood a few feet away from us, clearing his throat to get Will's attention.

Will groaned in annoyance while Nathaniel looked at me and smiled. "I see both of you are...busy. But no worries, I was just going to tell Will that I'll be gone for a while." Assuming he noticed my worried look, I asked, "Where are you going?"

"Oh, I'll only be out for a day or two. Depending on what Lauren plans," he said, trying to hide a grin but failing miserably. I grinned widely in return and eyed him suspiciously.

"Hmm, what do you plan on doing with Lauren for two days?" He laughed nervously, as if guilty of my supposed accusation.

"Stuff."And with that, he paced towards the front door, his hand settling on the knob.

"Have fun!" I called behind Nathaniel as he shut the door. I swear I could still imagine him grinning madly at the idea I instilled into his imagination.

"So," I heard Will say. "Will we be having our own little fun while they're away?" Uh-oh, sensing a little tease there. I know exactly what he meant by fun. Will may be a six hundred year old angelic reaper, but he was still a guy.

I felt the weight of Will's stare and stood up from the couch, heading up the stairs. I could hear Will following so I decided not to face him until we got into his room.

As I opened the door, the scent of Will clouded my thoughts while I entered. Looking around, I could tell he cleaned up recently. Not long after, I felt him standing behind me and turned to face him.

I place my free hand on his chest and slowly raise myself along the length of his body, until my lips are right next his ear. I pause, taking a moment to enjoy the way he tenses in anticipation, before whispering, "Get some rest," and gracefully made my way towards the bed.

I hear him groan in frustration behind me before jumping on the bed and grabbing my waist to pull me down on top of him. I look into his emerald eyes and kiss him lightly, brushing strands of hair from his forehead. He smiles lazily at me, his hands making soft patterns on my back. I sigh and roll over on my side and pretend to be asleep until he places his hand on my belly.

"Will," I whisper. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything." He replies, looking at me with sudden curiosity and sincerity.

"Have you ever had any past girlfriends while I know, away?" I ask with a difficulty saying the last word, knowing he'll have discomfort thinking about the times I was practically dead.

I held my breath as he hesitated to answer. "No. I haven't had any...girlfriends."

"So you never dated anyone?" I pressed, a certain doubt tingling my mind.

"Why are you asking?" Sounding a little dodgy now, are you, Will? Was he avoiding the question?

"Just curious." A somewhat query filling my womanly instincts.

After a few seconds of thought, he finally answered, "I haven't dated anyone." The stern finality in his voice signaled to me that this was the end of the conversation.

"Okay." I said feebly and exhaled sharply. Why do I feel like I don't believe him? I know it's silly to even think so. Out of the five hundred years of partnership, Will has never lied to me. Maybe not until now.

It was clear he didn't want to talk about it anymore, and in truth, I didn't either. My stomach turned and I looked at him. He was clearly drained, falling asleep in less than seconds. I rose from the bed and went downstairs to get myself a glass of water.

The hours ticked by and I found myself eating almost everything in the fridge. Damn it, Ellie. Why do you have to be such a pig? Mentally cursing myself, I let myself wander around the house. Observing every little detail there was, I found a door leading to the patio. I pushed it open and went out into the freezing air. It wasn't so bad after you got used to it. Lowering myself onto a bench, I tried to relax.

After a while, I look around with a growing awareness of someone out here. I stood up and nearly screamed as Cadan's presence scared the living soul out of me. I punched his arm and clutched my chest as my heart raced like a rabbit's against my rib cage.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered; his grin making me want to punch him. Again.

"What? Is it a crime to visit an old friend?" Psh, Cadan.

I scoffed. "Will is upstairs. He'll kill you!"

"Will," he said, mocking my voice in an odd tone that did not sound like me, "is unconscious and dreaming about llamas, toads and other things that are as weird as him."

I had to admit, I almost laughed. Instead, I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "You have to leave. He's gonna wake up soon."

"Soon," he repeated. "We'll have enough time then." He winked, which sent my heart fluttering fast like a little girl's.

I gave up, deciding it was futile to try to get Cadan to listen to anything I say. "Fine. But don't blame me if you get in trouble."

"Baby, trouble is my middle name." Cadan took a few steps towards me, minimizing the distance between us. I tensed as I could feel his breath on the top of my head. I shouldn't even let him be this close to me. But I didn't move away.

"Aren't you cold?" The moment he asked, I felt a shiver up my spine. He took off his jacket and draped it over my shoulders. I slip my arms through the sleeves, inhaling Cadan's soft smell of lavender and sunshine. If sunshine had a smell, this would be it.

"You smell nice." I blurted out and regretted it as soon as it came out of my mouth. He raised his eyebrow in surprise. "For a vir," I continued. I expected him to be offended or angry but he just shrugged.

"Well, I enjoy having red-heads complimenting me on my scent." He teased, slowly playing with the pendant of my necklace. I don't know how, but the space between us was completely closed in, his stomach and chest touching mine. I gasped as his warm hands cupped my face.

"What are you doing?"

He chuckled, his mint breath blowing across my face. "Just...stay still." No, no, no! Look away, now! I felt paralyzed. I could move but I wouldn't. I stood there, watching his face inch closer to mine. I waited for him to just get over with it. To kiss me. I'm only doing this because I feel sorry for him. If I pulled away now, I'd hurt his feelings. It sounded convincing enough in my head but I wasn't so sure that was the only reason I didn't pull away just yet.

His forehead touched mine but he didn't go any further. He was close enough to do it. Close enough to lay a soft kiss on my lips. But he didn't. Instead, he just stood there. Contented with the contact of our foreheads. Taking a deep breath, I grasped onto reality and took a step back. I didn't tear my eyes away from his, nor did he. However, he did take a step back as well and smiled gently.

"Your guard dog is up. I guess I gotta go." He was about to turn away, but looked back and said, "I'd like to do this again sometime. I wanna see you. Tonight, perhaps?"

I blinked twice and answered in a steady voice. "Rain check? I have something to do with Will. We're meeting a few people." What I should have said was, No. I won't. I can't. You're a reaper. You're the enemy. But for some miraculous reason, I couldn't find it in me to reject his offer.

"Its better than a 'no' I guess." His thumb traced my lips and I gasped. "I'll see you soon." A slight pause as he walks away. "But not soon enough." He winks and disappears into the Grim, leaving me dazed about what just happened a few minutes ago.

After a while, I heard Will going down the stairs. I didn't want to tell Will that Cadan had been here, but also, I couldn't keep any secrets from him. Though I'm sure he's hiding something from me right now.