15th November 2004

Light [Age 18]:

Dear Diary,

WOOT! Daddy finally managed to convince superiors to continue working on Kira case. So much fun pretending to be chased by sexy L. My sexy L! Where are you now? Up in the stars…In other news, moving in with Misa. WHY ME? So afraid of other developments that might happen during stay with Misa.

GADDAMN WHY DID I KILL THAT GENIUS!

L [Dead]:

Dear Diary,

Going to pass out due to lack of sugar. Have looked high and low for sweets but can't find anything. Had shinigami apples the other day. THEY TASTE LIKE SAND! Why damnit! Where are you sweet sugary goodness?

Can dead people pass out?

Near [Age 13]:

Dear Diary,

It has been so weird for the past 5 days. I think it's Matt's fault….No….I'm 100% sure this is Matt's fault. Mello has gone from being conscious yet confident to blubbering and self-conscious [thanks to me] to freakishly over confident…[thanks to Matt]. He's been walking around in vinyl pants for the past five days. Each day the only thing that changes is his shirt and the color of his pants. But they're all vinyl. ALL VINYL! Do you know what that means? It means every kid at Wammy has reached puberty pre-maturely.

Yes, including the five-year-olds.

Mello [Age 14]:

Dear Diary!

I HAVE LIKE THE SWEETEST BOYFRIEND EVER! I love my baby my Matty my red head sexy sex God…..shit! boner go down! ….hold on diary must go get Jeevas for help with boner.
Ok yeah so where was I….yeah…it's gonna be a little smutty 'kay diary? Don't cringe okay? Why would you….more like how would you. Anyways so Matt bought this like full length mirror thing and lots LOTS of clothes and like he sort of made me strip down to my birthday suit and stand in front of the mirror. He then proceeded to compliment every inch of me….Swooning was so inevitable. Though his idea was pretty creepy….it worked though. He bought so many vinyl pants and midriffs and vests and undershirts and…and so many other things. Bye bye self-consciousness!

I'm m'fucking perfect!

Matt [Age 14]:

Dear Diary,

Noticing all eyes on Mello every day since I bought that mirror and proceeded to boost his ego and over-fill his wardrobe with vinyl. I think I did a good job….too good in fact. Everyone stares at him now….like they weren't already all in awe of him. Either way I'm too mesmerized by how sexy he looks every day to care much. That ass I tell you! In fact I've been gawking at him so much that I can recite the exact order in which he wore all those outfits in chronological order and backwards. Day 1: black undershirt yellow vinyl pants. Day 2: white midriff black vinyl pants. Day 3: black leather vest black vinyl pants [I think that's my favorite…it suits him]. Day 4: black midriff hot pink vinyl pants. Day 5: black undershirt leopard print vinyl pants.

Don't make me say it backwards.