My first Paramore fanfic. Taylor/Hayley. Tayley. Haylor Enjoy! :D
It was a night that I can't even drift myself off to sleep. That nightmare, well, the same nightmare, always comes afterward. The fact that I lost my best friend, my best friend who is now a total stranger to me, always been the nightmare I've got lately. I can't deny the truth that he's no longer my best friend, someone that I can trust, someone who used to be there for me, whenever I need him. He's a stranger to me, to Jeremy, to Taylor, to us, who once best friends, after all. Josh. I can't deny it but I really miss the old version of Josh.
I sigh and I walked out my room then sit on the couch, staring blankly at the coffee table, thinking back times we've spent together. I remember when Josh had asked me to join the band, I was so excited that I couldn't stop myself to not talk about it. I remember the days when we would spend our times in Taylor's garage, or Josh's room, covering some songs, or writing songs. I remember the day when Josh asked me to be his girlfriend. I remember the day when we started to hit the road for the first time. I remember when Josh and I agreed to end our relationship, because we were worried that people would be focused on our relationship instead of our music, when actually we didn't want to end this relationship. I remember the times when Josh started to act weird, more likely not himself. I remember when Josh hardly ever smiling, or laughing, not like he used to. I remember the time when Josh told us that Zac and him would be leaving - that day, to be honest, I was kind of shattered into pieces, imagining what would the band be without Josh and Zac. I remember when Taylor, Jeremy and myself grouped ourselves into a big bear hug. I remember the day when Josh released their exit statement, and accusing me as the main trouble maker. I just can't stand it, we started the band for our love of music, and now here we are, ended up like this. There's something warm running down my cheeks. No doubt, I'm crying now. I bite my lip, and started to cry. In some points, I'm pretty worried that Taylor would be leaving too, knowing that he's close to Josh and Zac. What would I do with Jeremy later, what do we say to our fans, how would we act to our fans, those questions are spinning in my head, in case he would be leaving too. It would be the two of us, me and Jeremy, I think to myself. I wipe my eyes and stopped crying, deciding to wash my face, and drink some hot chocolate. It's 2:00 AM, there's rarely someone up this early. And there's no way in the world I would ring Jeremy or Taylor this late, they're probably also thinking about this too. I close my eyes and place my forehead on the top of my index fingers. I'm getting tired and sleepy. I really don't feel like sleeping but I can say that I'm pretty miserable with dark circles creeping on both of my eyes, making eye bags. Hell, I'm probably gonna die if I'm not taking sleep for days, or only 3 hours a day, just to think about this. I sigh and walked back to my room and toss myself to sleep, hoping there would be no nightmare.
I stay awake even I'm laying on my bed, thinking about the post we just read this morning. I close my eyes, those events this afternoon are still fresh in my mind - when Jeremy called me to come around to his place, I arrived, there was Hayley too, then I realized this was a sudden band meeting. Hayley gestured me to read what's on the laptop screen. I nodded and quickly sat next to Hayley, and we began to read the post. I choked, I looked to Jeremy as he was so shocked and buried his face in his hands, placing his elbows on both of his knees. I looked to Hayley. She absolutely lost for words (as well as the two of us did) as her face turned so pale, and her lips forming into a big 'O' then started to pace to the bathroom, locked herself and crying. There was I, with Jeremy, exchanging looks, didn't know what to do. Then Jeremy got up from the couch and asked Hayley to open the door. At first she refused but after many times Jeremy asked to open the door she finally opened it, walking back to the sofa where I sat followed by Jeremy. Her eyes were puffy and red, and she was panting for air then started to cry again. Jeremy hugged her, rocking her back and forth while saying comforting words. Then she looked up and panted for air again, and looked straight to my eyes. I could see misery in her eyes. She pulled me into hug along with Jeremy, and started to cry again. I just can't stand seeing the girl I love cry this long. It hurts me. She's been a strong person, always smiling even in the worst times, motivating others, and saying those comforting words, and this must be the worst part in her life that she couldn't fight the urge to cry this long. I sighed and patted her shoulder, closed my eyes. Talking about this, Zac, my best friend was taken away from me. The friendship and trust we've build for years is just easily torn apart in matter of day. The urge to leave suddenly popped into my head as hearing Hayley cries. I opened my eyes and looked at her and Jeremy sadly, confused of my own self. Few minutes later Hayley had stopped crying and thanked us for comforting her. Then she began to cook for lunch. I open my eyes as I stopped reliving the events that afternoon. I let out a long sigh, and positioning myself to sit up. It's 5:00 AM and I haven't even slept for 2 hours. I really need to talk to Hayley. My phone suddenly vibrates, it pops away my deep thoughts. I reach for my phone and man, it's a text from Zac. Hi Taylor, I just wanna say sorry. I'm so sorry that I can't be with all of you guys anymore even I still wanna be around. We're still friends, aren't we? I truly am sorry for all the things. I hope you guys would forgive me.. Please say hi to Hayley and Jeremy for me? I bite my lip, I don't know what to say. I'm thinking, then begin to type. Hey Zac, I thought you don't wanna talk to me for a while, hehe. I'm sorry that you can't be around us anymore and we do understand, we're not even mad at you. I just wanna say that no matter what happens, we're still dorky kids like we used to. Just because you're not in the band anymore doesn't mean it's the end of our friendship. Sure I'll say your hi to them. I re- read my text to Zac, and send it. Now that it is sent, I groggily get up from my bed and wash my face. Walking downstairs, I quickly grab some cereal and eat it.. Done eating cereal, I sit on my couch, staring blankly at the wall. I need to talk with Hayley. Think I should buy a showcase tickets so Hayley and I can talk a bit relaxed. I browse on my laptop and find a showcase by a local band, then I purchase two tickets. I shut my laptop off, staring at the wall blankly again. I am so tired. I yawn and curl myself into a ball and drift off to sleep on the couch, hoping tomorrow would be a better day than today.
It's 5.30 AM and I'm not even sleeping. I roll in my blanket, thinking about the post Josh has posted. He judged me. Sure, I honestly would say that I was such a jerk, just because Zac was only 12 at that moment I thought the band wouldn't be success, I ran away from them, but then I joined them back, and they accepted me. I thought we were all up over that but Josh is just not. I sigh, and texted Kat, my girlfriend, asking her to come around to my house tomorrow. She's in the US doing some news stuff since she's a reporter. I also really need to talk to Hayley and Taylor, anyway. But no, I think it would be nice if I talk to them tomorrow, knowing Taylor would make his move to her. I let out a slight, small grin as the thought of Taylor talking with Hayley, only the two of them, comes up to my mind. I go out from my room and pour myself milk and make some toasts as I turn on my laptop to find out things about Josh and Zac's exit statement. People would be so shocked, and of course there will be many news about this one. I sigh and rub my eyes. This is gonna be a tough day.
So how was it? Revieeeeeeewwwwssss are highly appreciated! Let me know what you think! If you think this is good I'll continue writing it! C: