You should not try to remember...

Chapter 1


Shikamaru slowly opens his eyes. Where is he? He's on a bed, but it's not his room... everything is white. He deduces that he's in the hospital. He looks by his left side, the window is open and it's sunny outside, but there's still a few of his favorite things: clouds.

"Shikamaru?" A feminine voice calls him, snapping him out of his reverie. He turns his head in the direction of the voice. A blonde girl is sitting by his other side, looking at him. She seems worried. Who is she? Why is she worried? He tries to think, tries to remember how he got to the hospital, his body doesn't hurt... except his head...

He lightly touches his head, and finds that a bandage is wrapped around it.

"My head hurts..." Shikamaru says to the girl. "I'm thirsty." He says as he slowly sits up in the bed. Damn, now his body hurt.

"Take this, you'll feel better. You got injured on the head during a battle." The blonde girl says as she gives him a glass of water and a painkiller.

"A battle? I don't remember..." Shikamaru mutters before he takes the painkiller and the water. "Thanks."

The blonde girl looks at him, perplexed. "You don't remember the mission against the missing nins of Iwa?"

Shikamaru shooks his head. The blonde girl looks at him a moment.

"Do you remember me?" Her voice was trembling.

Shikamaru examines her, she's clearly nervous. She's rather cute... but she's a girl, if he says he doesn't remember her, she's probably cry or yell at him, but he takes a guess.

"I don't remember you, but maybe I will remember once my head heals," he replies, hoping that she won't cry.

Unfortunately, the blonde girl began to sob. "I'm Ino, your teammate... do you remember anything at all?" She says like if she was about to burst into tears.

It's a shame girls have to be so annoying...

Shikamaru frowns and he looks outside, thinking. "Hum... from what you've said earlier, my name is Shikamaru..."

Ino sits on the bed by Shikamaru's side. "You know where you are?"

"I guess I'm in an hospital, since I got injured during a battle," Shikamaru replies nonchalantly.

"I mean... do you remember what's the name of the village?" She's trembling.

"What's going on? Why are you trembling? I said I will remember when I heal, you don't have to worry about me. I'm Shikamaru and I'm in the hospital. I like to watch clouds and play shogi." He says, still looking at the clouds.

"With Asuma." Ino says with a smile, thinking she was completing the sentence of his comrade, thinking he was starting to remember.

"Asuma?" Shikamaru looks at her, confused.

"You... you don't remember our Sensei? He sacrificed his life for us!" Ino says, shocked.

".. I'm sorry..." Shikamaru looks at his hands resting on his lap. He tried to reassure her, but he failed. Now she's crying. Damn... it's even worse than before...

Ino began to be hysteric. "Do you remember your parents? Or Chouji? He's your best friend! And Kurenai? You promised to protect her! And Tsunade? She's..."

"STOP IT!" Shikamaru yells, holding his head with his hands. "I don't remember anything, alright? Please leave me alone for a moment..." Ino stays by his side a moment before she leaves without a word.

How could he forget about such important things? His name, his parents, his friends... He looks at the clouds, he remembers looking at them for so long, maybe that's why he still remembers that part of himself. At least he didn't forget everything. He will remember one day, he will definitely remember... he must remember...


A week passes since the day Shikamaru woke up at the hospital. Many people visit him, he slightly remembers a few people like Chouji or Kurenai, but he doesn't remember most of them. He remembers that he's a ninja, a jounin and he starts to remembers a couple of ninja techniques and taijutsu.

Shikamaru is now at his home with the people Ino told him were his parents, even if they feel like total strangers to him. His head still hurts and most of the time, he plays shogi with his father or watches the clouds when his mother doesn't bother him to do the laundry...

Shikamaru takes another painkiller. "Damn, my head is killing me..." He says to himself as he touches the scar on his forehead, walking to the living room. He sits in front of the shogi table and stares at it, lost in his thoughts.

"Why is the only thing I really remember is playing shogi? Maybe I played too much in my past life... my past life, it sounds like if I got a new life since I got injured... I was playing shogi with my teacher, Asuma. I remember shogi but I don't remember him..."

He hears his father return from the grocery and his mother calls for him, but he doesn't listen. "My teacher sacrificed his life for me, my parents have been with me since I was born, why don't I remember them? Tsunade-sama, the great medic-nin and the most powerful ninja of the village... Kurenai, I promise to our dying teacher to protect her and their child... I don't remember any of them... The only thing I can remember is clouds and the damned shogi!" He stands up and kicks the shogi table, upset, it goes flying into a corner.

"Shikamaru?" His father is standing at the door, looking at him, but Shikamaru passes by him.

"I'm going." The young jounin simply says, he doesn't even bother to look back at him.

"But the dinner is almost ready!" He heard his "mother" yells at him from the kitchen.

"I'm not hungry!" Shikamaru answers back at her before he enters the Nara forest.

The Nara forest, the only place where he can find peace and quiet to think. And no one will bother him here. This forest is the only proof he has that he really is Shikamaru Nara, because nobody can enter in the forest without permission except a Nara.

He walks for a moment before he comes upon an area where the ground has been disturbed recently.

"I wonder what's buried there, no one can enter in this forest..." Shikamaru thinks as he crouches down and examines the ground.

To be continued...

Thanks to sunshinelexi for beta-reading!