Author's Note: Hey, it's me! Well, who else would it be? I've noticed that all my Spelling Bee stories have the same sad tone to them. I'll try to write a happy one soon, it's just that I do a lot of thinking about the characters problems and home lives, and they start to seem pretty messed up, and my writing reflects them. Anyways, here's Logainne thinking about her fault. Well, most of them aren't thinking about an internal fault, they're thinking more about an external fault. Augh! Why am I dissecting my own writing? I'm going to stop now, and you can read the story. Enjoy, happy R-E-A-D-I-N-G!

Logainne SchwartzandGrubenierre

Vug: noun; a small cavity in a rock or vein, often lined with crystals.

Logainne always felt torn between being the champion that Carl Dad knew she could be and being the princess that Dan Dad thought she was. She wanted to win, she liked winning, but she also liked being pampered and spoiled, which happened more when Carl Dad was drilling into her about losing.

She had wanted to win the county bee, but Carl Dad's voice had popped into her head, reminding her that words weren't always as simple as they sounded. She had over complicated 'vug' and ended up losing by spelling it, 'vugghe'. Carl Dad still hadn't let her live it down. Dan Dad had more than made up for that in cupcakes and movies and new clothes.

This had always made Logainne confused. Was losing a bad thing, or a good thing? She hated letting Carl Dad down, but it had such great rewards from Dan Dad.

Carl Dad. He knew the worst of the world, but he also knew that best. He knew that not everything was perfect, but he knew somethings could be, and he pushed Logainne to be. He tried to toughen her up for the harsh world, and tried to accept nothing less than perfect. Logainne tried, she did.

Dan Dad. He knew everything about Logainne. He knew her limits, the same limits his partner tried to push and break. Dan had a strange second sense that allowed him to tell when his daughter needed a break and would act appropriately toward that need.

Logainne loved both her dads. They both loved her. They just each loved her differently.

Carl Dad pushed her to reveal the beautiful, powerful, intelligent girl within.

Dan Dad pampered her to coax the beautiful, powerful, intellegent girl out.

Logainne knew that she could get that girl to come out whenever she wanted, she just wasn't ready yet. Letting that girl out meant meeting her birth mother, which was something she wasn't ready to do.

Letting that girl out might mean losing Dan Dad's pampering.

Letting that girl out might mean losing Carl Dad's pushing.

She couldn't let go of either of those.

But, had she lost because of those?

Had Carl Dad pushing her to be the best at everything caused her to lose at something? Had Dan Dad coddling her caused her to lose? Had knowing that she'd gain something by losing, made her lose? Had the subconcious fear of exposing that girl, or even just a slight bit of that girl, caused her to lose? She would probably never know.

Vug: noun; a small cavity in a rock or vein, often lined with crystals.