I.

Of all the loudest, most obnoxious students at Gensokyo Girls' High, none could but pale and be stunned to silence by the arrival of Alice Margatroid. The quiet new addition to the grade eleven class had but arrived that morning, and in no time at all she had become more wild and wonderful a centre of attention than had ever been before. Within hours, the innermost dirty details of her life thus far had been sought, stolen, and exploited into the viewing of the general public on the front page of the school newspaper; the contents of which were shocking to the extent that several fainted students had had to be rushed to the nurse's office at the rate of wounded soldiers to a hospital during the Second World War.

"A NAME AND NOTHING MORE," the headline read in big, bold capital letters. There were no pictures on the front page, but something about it was captivating nevertheless; the author seemed to have gone for a format that, to say the least, was unique.

"Name: Margatroid, Alice

"Date of Birth: Unknown

"Parent(s) or Guardian(s): Unknown

"Family Background Information: Unknown

"Schools Attended: Canadian Academy, Kobe (approximately grades seven to eleven)

"Honours and Awards Received: Is fluent in English.

"Academic Information: Above average. Scores generally range from ninety-four to ninety-eight percent.

"Participation in Extracurricular Activities: Volunteers at shelters. Is proficient in carpentry.

"Disciplinary Information: Keeps to herself.

"Psychological Evaluation: Does not interact with living things."

While this could hardly be considered an article, nobody really gave two shits as long as the school's trusty cycle of gossip kept spinning around and around – so just like that, Alice became the most popular girl in the school. What was not to like, after all? Not only did she have a strange, foreign sort of beauty about her, but she was probably... a pro at badminton; an-all around formidable athlete who spoke five languages, knew famous Europeans, and was academically so perfect her teachers had to chop a mark or two off her grades every once in a while so as not to arouse suspicion. Her only notable flaw was her unwaveringly icy, frigid manner – but even this, it was said, only added to the air of mystery that already hung about the girl wonder like a ghost.

"Such is the power of gossip," a student grumbled. Her back was propped sluggishly up amongst a line of narrow lockers, and as she spoke, her deep blue eyes rolled slowly.

"Such is the power of Aya!"

The dirty blonde beside her laughed, throwing an arm around the shoulders of her friend, letting the other still half-dangle by her side with the newspaper in its hand. The student with her back against the lockers scowled with genuine disdain towards such close proximity between them, and turned away, the white braids on either of side of her thin face whipping sharply as knives as she moved.

A girl with a head of brilliant brown hair, held back neatly by a pretty red ribbon, leaned in, scrutinising the article with more interest now that her friends' reactions were proving so interestingly mixed. Her dark eyes leapt quickly back and forth across the page, and at about the fifth or sixth line, they widened.

"Oh, wow," she breathed, "she's been to Canadian Academy!" Glancing briefly upwards to meet the gazes of the whole group, all overflowing with WTF, she elaborated, "Canadian Academy isn't just one of the most prestigious boarding schools in Japan; it's one of the most prestigious boarding schools in the whole world. Students come from all over Europe, North America, China, everywhere to attend."

From above the brunette, a tall, pretty girl laughed. "Trust you to know something like that, Reimu," she remarked fondly.

A burst of colour became the brunette's cheeks, and she gazed off to the side.

The tall girl, a yellow-haired beauty, sighed dreamily. "Europe, huh? Must be some real hot guys at that school..."

A scoff sounded from her left; a laugh from her right.

"Who do you think you're shitting, senpai?" Another statuesque blonde looked entirely unamused as she spoke.

"Honestly," a short, boyish-looking student who seemed as though she ought still to be in primary school chirped loudly between rude, uncontained giggles and snorts, "as though anyone still thinks you're interested in guys, Yukari-senpai!"

Yukari didn't dignify this with a verbal response. She only smiled, winking slyly at the taller girl and playfully ruffling at the little one's hair.

The girl with the white hair – and issues – from before snorted. "Why the fuck is it called Canadian Academy?"

Collective, unknowing sighs.

"Hey..." a green-haired girl broke in suddenly, seizing the fleeting silence that hardly appeared in the presence of such loud people for a chance to speak her mind on the subject of the newspaper article. The frog shaped hair clip atop her head glowed like a figurative lightbulb. "Isn't it weird to put 'is fluent in English' in Honours and Awards Recieved?"

Yukari leaned over Reimu purposefully.

"It does kind of seem like they were scraping what little they could to put her permanent record together. I mean... her psychological evaluation is 'does not interact with living things'. That's just fucked."

Silence. Contemplation. Realisation.

Collectively, the six of them nodded. "Yeah... it really is."


Across the hall, a thick puff of smoke left the lips of a girl whose hair fell freely to her ankles and was adorned evenly with several little white ribbons. In her right hand was a small, burning cigarette, and in her left was the hand of another. Her blood red eyes darted around between every person who passed her, gathered and whispering around the cover of a Gensokyo Gazette as each were, in silent, heavy condemnation. Her expression twisted angrily as she heard exchanges of falsehoods on the school's latest victim – some poor, unsuspecting new girl named Alice – and she breathed in, as if to calm herself.

"You'd better put that away, Mokou," the student to the left of the girl warned.

Mokou gave an absent hum of acknowledgement. The girl beside her, with the soft brown eyes and the light blue hair, tugged at her hand; and when this drew no response she reached over and snatched the cigarette away.

Mokou was quickly jolted into awareness. She spun around.

"Hey, give that back Keine!"

Keine pretended not to notice. She tossed the cigarette with flawless accuracy at a rubbish bin across the corridor and smiled at Mokou as though what had just transpired had not. The girl with the eyes that never ended frowned, but Keine knew that she was forgiven – they were still holding hands, after all.

"So," she began, leading Mokou down the hallway to their classroom, "this new girl. Pretty interesting, huh? And her first day hasn't even started."

"Hai, kaichou," Mokou teased, and then took a turn for the serious again, "but if you ask me, it's disgusting. Whatever's in this girl's past she clearly doesn't want it to be found out – and what business is it of ours anyway?"

Keine nodded, her smile crooked, unsure and a little apprehensive. "I don't disagree. No good can come of prying into her business. But..." she blushed a little, ashamed, "you're not even a little curious?"

Mokou laughed, finally, and looked a little more at ease. "Yes, I suppose I am. But still..."

The pressure she felt on her hand was enough to know she needn't say any more.

"I'm gonna do it!"

Mokou's head whirled around to take in the short, blonde girl who had just flung the window open. She frowned a little as a gust of cold air slapped her in the face, but Keine briefly leaned in and suddenly she felt enveloped in warmth again. As the girl by the window began to teeter dangerously off the sill, Mokou and Keine silently parted ways to take their seats.

"I'm really gonna do it this time, I swe–"

"That's enough theatrics for today, Rumia-chan."

Mokou observed the meek, calming girl with the green hair lift the blonde as though she were a feather, and place her gently through her squirms and her struggles in her seat.

"Thanks, Hina," Reimu exclaimed with a genuine gratitude, "you saved Yuuka-senpai another one."

Hina blushed a little, fiddling with the hair that was tied up under her chin and nodding as she returned to her seat. Reimu, however, began to experience something irritating breathe down her back.

"I think she likes you, Reimu~"

She snapped her fist back, and it met the annoying thing in the face. Yukari leaned back into her seat, laughing as she held her bleeding nose.

"Man, you're gonna have to take me to the nurse and kiss that better now..."

Mokou vaguely acknowledged the Prismrivers begin to play something slow, soft, and rather sweet as – contrary to what most had been expecting – the brunette's mouth came in contact with the blonde's bloodied nose.

"Oi, Fujiwara!"

Mokou didn't try to hide the shudder that came over her at the excruciating voice from the seat immediately behind. Without even looking at her rival her eyes had instinctively narrowed, and her face took on a positively menacing front.

"What the fuck do you want, Houraisan?"

A snicker. Mokou felt the blood circulate directly to her fist, so that she might punch the bitch with such force a girl could only dream of.

"New student... thoughts?"

"None."

"Liar."

"Cun–"

"Okuu, Rin, set that fire out this instant! Settle down, class!"

Mokou forced her attention back to the front of the classroom as their short – this was an understatement – but endlessly energetic homeroom teacher began incessantly and vociferously slapping a ruler against her desk. A girl whose midnight black hair tumbled messily down her strong shoulders grinned sheepishly, and her friend, whose orange hair had been whacked into a pair of braids, poured a conveniently placed bucket of water over the burning desk, laughing heartily as she did so. Once the little blue haired woman was satisfied in that she had averted everyone's attentions to her, she grinned, and cleared her tiny little vocal chords. Absently, Mokou noted that the classroom door was wide open.

"As I'm sure you've all heard" – a menacing glace directed at the girl with the short dark hair and the pencil behind her ear – "today, I have the pleasure of introducing a new addition to the grade eleven class."

Mumbles, an ecstasy of fumbling. In the far left corner of the classroom, a bored blonde lifted a heavy eyelid.

"Please welcome Miss Alice Margatroid."

When the empty-eyed girl with the red headband stepped in, Marisa's eyelids weren't so heavy anymore.


A/N: Well. I actually started writing this chapter in September-ish, and then never got around to/was never motivated enough to finish it. It was half done when I found it recently and I thought this'll be fun to write, let's go for it. ;_;

This multichap isn't going to be an angsty highschool fic so I apologise if that was what you were hoping for. It's going to be somewhat plotline oriented but not really – for the most part, every new chapter is going to be like a little oneshot of life in Gensokyo Girls' High. It's mostly going to be crack, because I don't really write crack and writing this chapter alone was a hell of a lot of fun :D there will be shipping though so beware if you don't ship my ships.

Please review! The first chapter leaves the largest impression after all. c: