Hey everyone! I LOVED Pirates: Band of Misfits! I just had to start writing for it! So, I hope you enjoy!

Truth be told, it was hard for him to walk away with his head held high this year. When he first became a pirate, he knew that there was probably no chance of him winning 'Pirate of the Year'. He was the new guy, it was common fact the new guy hardly ever wins.

The second year he entered, he had a small chance. Third year, he was pretty much in the group, but still didn't win. Now it was his fifth year entering and still nothing. The golden skull prize had eluded him once again.

"It's alright, Captain," said Albino Pirate with a supported smile.

"Yeah Captain," added Gout Pirate, "There's always next year, right?"

Captain smiled slightly. "Yes, there's always next year." No matter how many times he entered, his crew would always support him. It made losing not quite as bad. But still... "Men, I'll be in my quarters for the rest of the night." And with that, he climbed onto his ship and went straight into his room.

As he sat at his desk, he felt the boat moving forward, away from Blood Island. He also heard the celebration from the winner's boat as they passed him. "Lucky stiff," he mumbled, trying to block out the noise.

"Sir?" He looked up and saw his best friend poking his head out from behind the door.

"What is it, Number Two?" Captain asked.

"I just wanted to see if you were alright," he replied, walking inside the room. He glanced at the familiar pictures at the wall, and then at his sullen captain. "Is, everything alright?"

The Captain sighed. "I don't understand it, Number Two," he said as he stood up and begun to pace. "I mean, I understand the competition is all about how much treasure you have, but being a pirate isn't just about the treasure!"

"Yeah, it's about plundering!" "And traveling to new lands!" "And adventure!" The Captain looked up and saw his ease-dropping crew in the doorway. They all gave an innocent smile, but he gave them a look. "I think I'll go swab the deck." "I'll help!" "I'll come too!" With that, the crew quickly shut the door.

"I mean, style and crew must count for something!" Pirate Captain continued, "I have the best crew around! And as for style, well," he chuckled, "Come on."

"Well, perhaps you're missing something," said Number Two.

"Hmm, perhaps. Well, let's just give it a look, shall we?" Without another word, the Captain reached under his desk and pulled out a huge book with a red cover and gold lettering that read 'The Big Book on How To Be a Pirate'. The captain smiled. "Best book I ever plundered." That librarian put up one heck of a fight, but it was worth it.

The two friends opened the book, flipping through the pages. "Let's see here," said Number Two, "Plundering, How to Steer a Ship, Picking Out Your Crew, Cleaning your Cannons, Ah! Here we go! The Look of a Pirate Captain, page fifty seven!"

"Well, what are you waiting for!" Pirate Captain said anxiously, "Read what it says!"

"Alright alright," replied Number Two. He opened to the page and began to read. "To truly capture the look of a Pirate Captain, you must have these things: A fashionable coat..."

"Check," Pirate Captain said, looking at his red coat. Definitely fashionable.

"A matching captain's hat..."


"A sharp and shiny sword."

"Sharpen and shine it everyday, check."

"A thick, well-kept beard."

The Captain smiled. "Check and Check."

"Oh, and a parrot." The Captain looked up.

"What was that, Number Two?" he asked.

"Well," Number Two replied, "It says here, 'While having a parrot is optional, it really does tie the whole Pirate Captain look together'. Huh."

"Well, what are we waiting for!" Pirate Captain shouted as he slammed the book shut, "Let's go find a parrot!" He was back in his usual cheery attitude. A parrot was a perfect idea! Not only would one increase the chance of him winning 'Pirate of the Year', but they could also be useful. Perhaps as a messenger bird, or a hunter for all the rats on the boat. Yes, this was a great idea! "So, where should we head first to find our little parrot?"

"How about Parrot Island?" Number Two asked, a map already laid out on the Captain's desk.

The Captain blinked. "Uh, yes! Of course! How convenient. Good thinking, Number Two!" said Pirate Captain, "Alert the crew! We're heading to Parrot Island!"


It only took three days to reach the island. As they got closer, they could hear nothing but the calls of parrots. With all those birds, one had to be good enough to help win 'Pirate of the Year'. The ship was docked and so Pirate Captain grabbed a net and began to walk of the ship. As soon as he did, he heard about a dozen footsteps behind him.

He turned around and looked at the crew. "We're coming, aren't we Captain?" Albino Pirate asked.

"Oh, I'm afraid not," replied Pirate Captain, "You see, like picking a hat or a ship to sail, a captain must make this choice alone. He must travel into the dense jungle, relying on his own captain instincts and pick out a bird fine enough to be on his ship! ...With a second opinion from his best mate, of course." He grabbed Number Two's arm, yanking him over by him. "Wish me luck!" With that, he pulled his friend along as he walked off the boat, shouts of "Good luck Captain!" behind him.

"So Sir," said Number Two as they entered the jungle, "Do you have a parrot in mind?"

"Oh I'll know it when I see it!" Captain replied, "It'll be my bird after all." His eyes scanned the thick trees, his ears opened and waiting for a call. Just then, there was a flash of red. Sitting in a tree, there was a bright red parrot with blue wings. The Captain gasped and smiled. "Perfect." Without having to be told, Number Two handed Captain the net.

"Alright Parrot," he said, taking small steps towards the creature, "Time to go to your new home!" He tossed the net up in the air, but the bird was too fast. With a squack, it dodged the net and flew away. "Oh, Neptune's beard!"

"I'm sorry, Sir," said Number Two.

"Oh, it's alright," Captain replied, "Obviously, that was just a test. The next one will be the right one!"

Two hours later, the two had found over a dozen parrots, and all of them had escaped. Although the last one had been caught. "Yes!" Captain had shouted. He ran over to the net. "Alright Parrot, let's go-" As soon as he lifted the net, the angry green and yellow parrot let out an angry crow and began pecking at the Captain's face. He let out a scream and quickly covered his face.

"Sir!" Number Two shouted. That was all he could get out before the parrot started attacking him as well.

"RETREAT!" Captain shouted, grabbing the empty net. Number Two quickly followed. As soon as they were a safe enough distance away, Pirate Captain let out a sigh and sat down on a fallen tree.

"Oh, maybe we should just go back to the ship," he said, feeling disheartened once again.

"Well, maybe they're just cranky at this time of the day," said Number Two, "We could always try in the morning."

"I suppose your-" The Captain stopped mid-sentence. The bushes started to shake. Number Two placed a hand on the handle of his sword while Pirate Captain watched the bush with curiosity and slight nervousness. After a few moments, a small black beak poked out from between the leaves. "Huh?"

A feathered head popped out and stared at the Captain. The creature walked out slowly. It was obviously a bird, and a small one at that. Well, small in size, probably only a foot high, maybe even less. As for its' waist, it was definitely not small there. Compared to the rest of the beautiful parrots on the island, this one looked... odd.

"It's perfect!" Pirate Captain smiled.

Number Two blinked. "Sir, I'm not even sure its' a-"

"Nonsense! It's just a little big boned," Pirate Captain replied, not letting him finish. He lifted the net once again, only this time, he kept his hands close to his face, just in case. But before he even had a chance to toss the net, the bird smiled and happily ran towards the Captain, taking a seat on his boot. Pirate Captain blinked and looked at his friend. "Uh, right. Just as I planned."


"Do you see them yet?" Curvy Pirate asked.

"I'll tell you when I see them when I see them!" Gout Pirate replied, looking away from the telescope.

"They're back!" Albino Pirate shouted. Quickly, everyone on the boat ran to the side of the ship. There they saw Pirate Captain and Number Two. The Captain was looking proud with a net hanging over the side of his shoulder. There was a bird inside it, although it looked anything but scared. In fact, it looked like it was having fun, swinging back and forth in the net.

"So, what kind of parrot is it?" Albino Pirate asked, smiling brightly at the ship's new member.

"Um, the best kind! Of course!" Pirate Captain replied. He opened the net, and picked up the bird. It let out a happy squack at the crew.

"Aww! She's so cute!" said Curvy Pirate, his voice more feminine than usual. The crew all gave 'him' a look.

"Wait, how do you know it's a she?" Pirate Captain asked.

"Uh, instincts?" Curvy Pirate replied, his voice back to normal.

"Well, fair enough," Pirate Captain replied, "Well then, 'her' name will be..." He thought for a moment. "Ms. Parrot."




"How about Polly?" Curvy Pirate suggested.

"I kinda like Polly." "I like it too." "It is a good name for a parrot."

"Hmph," said Pirate Captain, "Alright, her name is Polly." The crew cheered and Polly smiled at her new family. "Okay Polly old girl," said the Captain, "Let's see how far you can fly."

He tossed the bird in the air... and she dropped like a bag of rocks. She just sat on the floor, looking a bit confused but then just standing up and waddling over to another part of the ship.

"What happened?" Albino Pirate asked.

"Maybe she's dumb," Gout Pirate said.

"Maybe she just hasn't learned yet," said Curvy Pirate.

"Well, we'll just have to teach her," Pirate Captain replied. What use was a flightless bird? "Until then, what's say we have Ham Night early this week?" The crew let out a mighty cheer. "Number Two, bring out the ham!"

"Yes Sir!" Number Two replied happily. The crew followed him inside, still cheering. Smiling, the Captain began to follow when he heard a call that stopped him. Not wanting to be alone, Polly ran as fast as her little legs could carry her over to the Captain. She looked up at him with big pleading eyes.

"Alright, you can come along too," Pirate Captain said as he picked up the young bird. She nuzzled next to his chest, and he smiled just a little. "I hope you like ham."


The sound of the sea had just put him to sleep. With the rocking of the waves and his soft bed resting his tired feet, Pirate Captain was practically out like a light. A Humpback whale called outside the ship, but he had heard that call so many times it barely stirred him. The same for the rest of his crew. Unfortunately, one crew member wasn't used to the noise.

The door, already opened just a tiny crack, slammed open. Frightened bird calls woke the Captain, making him yell out in surprise. "What in the world!" As soon as he sat up, he felt what seemed like a cannonball knock him back down. Opening his eyes, he saw a smaller (and slightly frightened) pair staring right back at him. "Polly!"

"Captain? Are you alright?" Number Two asked as he ran into the room, sword ready to defend.

"How'd she get out of her cage?" Pirate Captain asked, obviously not too happy to be woken up.

"Well, to be fair it was fashioned out of silverware," Number Two said, "It probably wasn't too hard to get out of. She was probably frightened by the whales or something. This is her first night off the island after all."

"Right," replied the Captain, looking down at the bird. He would have to remember to try and steal a cage later. He liked the bird, but he needed his sleep, and he wouldn't be able to get it with her in his room. "Well, come on Polly, back to bed."

He placed his hands on the bird, and picked her up. As soon as she was lifted, Polly panicked. She bit the Captain's finger and was dropped back onto his lap.

"Ow!" He shouted, "Why you little-!" He tried to grab Polly again, but she either dodged or pecked. "Number Two, help me!"

"Actually, she seems pretty set on sleeping here tonight," replied Number Two, "Perhaps it would just be easier to let her."

Pirate Captain sighed. He looked at Number Two, then Polly, then the clock, then back at Number Two. "I suppose." He looked down at Polly. "But we are not making a habit of this." Polly just smiled at him.

"Goodnight Sir," said Number Two, walking out of the door.

"Goodnight Number Two," Pirate Captain replied as he laid back down, Polly sitting happily on his stomach. No sooner had he closed his eyes, he felt small bird feet walk up his chest. "Hey, lay down!"

Polly looked at him curiously. "Go on now." Polly gave him what almost looked like a nod, and then climbed into his beard. "No! No! I didn't mean lay down in-! *Sigh* Oh whatever." He was too tired to argue with the bird.

His breathing matched Polly's. Surprisingly, she didn't snore. Just breathed softly, letting out a tiny 'coo' every once in a while. Absentmindedly. the Pirate Captain reached up and into his beard until he felt feathers. He began stroking them. They were so soft and smooth, almost like velvet. Polly began to coo louder. It almost sounded like purring now.

The Captain chuckled. "You can't fly, you're a pest around bedtime, you weigh a ton after you eat, and now you're practically a cat," he thought. But even so, she seemed to like him. She liked his crew, she liked everyone. And they liked her, even the Captain. "But you are kinda cute."


"Where is he?" "It isn't like him to be late on breakfast." "I hope he didn't come down with something."

Number Two glanced at the clock. Nearly ten o'clock. Where was their captain? He was always in the dining room in the mornings, eight thirty every morning. But this morning, he was almost two hours late. Did Polly make him ill? Maybe she was diseased, she was from the jungle after all.

"Number Two, why don't you go check on him," Albino Pirate said, snapping him out of thoughts.

"Right, of course," Number Two replied as he stood up from the table. He walked across the ship to the Captain's quarters. "Captain?" he said as he opened the door slightly. Looking at the bed, he found it empty. Instead the Captain was fully dressed and sitting at his desk, with Polly sitting on top of it.

Holding a pan of cooked bacon ("He must have cooked it earlier that morning when no one was up," Number Two thought), he picked up a strip. "Aw, now who's a good girl? Who's a good girl?" he asked.

Polly let out a happy call. Captain tossed the bacon in the air, and Polly caught it with no trouble at all, swallowing it whole. Pirate Captain chuckled and started petting the bird. "That's right," he said, "you are."

Number Two couldn't help but smile. It looked like Polly and Pirate Captain were getting along. After what happened the night before, it was a pleasant surprise. He watched as Polly tried to get another bacon strip.

He still thought she looked odd. But then again, they were probably the oddest crews in all the seven seas. But they were also the most caring towards one another. Number Two smiled as he shut the door.

He had a feeling Polly was going to fit in just fine.

So, how was it? Good? Bad? Okay? Please review, I'd like to write more Pirate stories, so if you have any constructive criticism to share, I'll gladly accept it. Please review and I hope you all enjoyed it! See you next time!