Written before Tony's arrival.
I do not own anything.
And yes this was on my other account. That account had to be changed for personal reasons they are taken down from that account. So NEYH!
I watched her a lot. I didn't mean too, it's not like I was trying to watch her. It just happened. It was kind of hard to avoid her when you live in the same…van…truck…thing.
She was beautiful and I don't think she even knew it. I mean, she knew she was pretty and all that but I don't think she realized how absolutely gorgeous she was. Or maybe she did and she was trying to torture me. Who knows? All I do know is that she is too good for me. She is so caring and kind, and beautiful. I could never forget beautiful. She deserves someone who can give her the home that she has wished for. Wished for as long as I have known her.
Right now she is sitting beside me looking at that magazine again. I could never give her that, I don't want that. I am free now, free like I never was before when I had a home. She always complains about being trapped but she does not understand a fixed home, a fixed life, is the most horrible kind of trapped there is. There is a comfort in coming home to the same bed every night but the price of that comfort is chains. Chains that fix you down and pin you in one place. No, I could never give her a home, I would never want to.
I want her to be free; free to go where ever she wants to as long as she takes me with. I would take her to see Paris, Madrid, Barcelona, maybe even to the coast of the Atlantic over in the states. But she does not want travel, she does not want adventure. She does not want me. So here I sit watching her read those magazines that I could never live up to and that she will probably never have.
She is still beautiful.