So what happens when you take the trolls, split them into gender groups and run them through a random number generator?

Random pairing drabbles! And oh boy, do I have a tough one to start with. Nothing like a challenge, is there?

Hope you enjoy! (Although if you don't, do say.)


"Uh, Feferi, I don't think this is, uh, a very good idea."

You giggle and extend a hand.

"Come on, Tavros! It's reely fun, trust me!"

He stammers and blushes, but he descends shakily into the pool. The adjustments Equius made to his legs hold up, and soon he's standing on the bottom, water up to his waist. He squeaks a little at the chill. Putting this pool in was the best idea you've had for a while! The seadwellers really needed somewhere to keep damp, so you asked Equius and Kanaya to help you build this. Only a little thing, more like a fish tank than a pool, but it reminds you of home.

You swim up to Tavros and stand, glubbing in excitement. He looks bemused and a bit lost and rather cute, if you dare say so!

"Alright then, Tav! Just lie on your front and I'll support you!"

"Won't I, be, uh, a bit heavy?"

"Not in the water! Now lie forward!"

He complies, because you'll keep him here all day to learn how to swim if you have it your way, and you bring your arms under his chest and wow, he's buff! Nowhere near Equius level, and not the lean grace of Karkrab, but he's got quite a bit of muscle. It must be from his days in that wheeled device that awful cerulean-blood put him in.

"Now, just do what Gamzee showed you, okay? And keep your chin above water!"

Ah, Gamzee. You don't think Tav would be here now if it weren't for the clownfish! But the purple-blood knew how to swim a little, and Tavros was very receptive to ideas from his best bro. It's cute! You think they'd be great morayeels, at the least!

You watch him do the motions like he's been taught, and then you say, "Okay, Tav, I'm going to let go now. Keep doing those motions, and remember what Gamzee said!"

"It's, um, harder in the water, than on a table," he stammers out, voice tight with exertion.

"You'll be fine! I'll be right next to you, okay? Trust me!"

You drop your arms, and there's an awful moment where you think Tavros might sink, but the legs don't drag him down. He starts moving away, feet kicking and arms pulling, and then he laughs!

"I, I'm doing it!" he cries out to the world, "I'm doing it, I'm swimming!"

You laugh too, and then you join him, lazily swimming alongside and glubbing encouragement at him. His face is all screwed up with effort and he's slow but he looks so happy to be doing anything at all with his new legs. When he reaches the other side and stands, you think he looks quite handsome with the water shining off his torso and he looks so pleased with himself, so you can't help but give him a big hug!

"Um, thank you, Feferi."

"Not a problem," you say, and in your mind you weigh up the options and eventually you decide "to the pit with it." You're lonely (Sollux isn't really matespirit material -but he's great, don't get that wrong), you never cared for the haemospectrum, and he's cute. It'll make Vriska angry too, but that's just the coral on top of the reef.

You plant your lips on his, just briefly, and watch his face turn toffee.

"Uh, oh, um, Feferi, um," he babbles.

You put a finger on his lips to shoosh him, and then you go in again and you're pleased when he responds.

That's two things you've taught him today!