AN 5/7: I cringe at all the spelling errors and grammatical mistakes I made in my haste to post it. Apologies to those who had to see it that way the first time. Cleaned it up some more and added a few lines here or there, but nothing big.
AN: This was an old story idea that had been pretty much lost to me up until I got bored while riding the train and decided to have a good laugh at my own shoddy writing. The idea sparked something in me, so I tried to revamp and clean it up somewhat and send it into the proper crossover section. It was a one chapter thing, but keep in mind it was written sometime before the filler ark had ended on the anime, so the stories not exactly going to match up with current events. Hopefully the spark won't die too soon and I'll actually take it somewhere, but no promises.
Tsunade had a headache. A very big headache. Naruto had been bugging her for another S class mission again, Hinata and Sakura kept asking permission to enter the jounin exams even though both were clearly jounin material but refused to simply be promoted when all their friends had gone through the exams and slapped down the opposition like three year olds, and to top it all off there was always the endless amount of paperwork she needed to grapple with. People seemed to think that being Hokage was a cake walk and all about the hat (ahem Naruto), but the truth of the matter was, the position of any Kage in the shinobi world was pretty much the ultimate pencil pusher. There was almost no mission that required a Kage's personal attention other than to put a rubber stamp onto the approval form, the debriefing was often handled by chunin who had to deal with reading through the tedious request of the client and paraphrasing it into a form the leader of the village could read in less than a minute and understand.
Hell half the time Tsunade was holed up in a meeting somewhere discussing some mundane subject like the color of the Spring Festival banners (who gives a dead puppy whether it was pink or purple? But no, the meeting took four hours to finally decide on yellow which wasn't even on the options considered until the last fifteen minutes of the meeting when a vote had to be cast before Danzo and Hiashi came down to blows over the issue (who knew Danzo was so passionate about pink?)), or in a meeting with a shinobi giving them their annual evaluation (good job you survived another year! I see you only lost two teeth this year, a personal best! Keep up the good work!), or in a meeting with the Fire country Daiymo (one of the few she looked forward to, the man always brought the best sake and was a gambling addict easily rivaling her) or god forbid the weekly jounin meetings (She thought about passing a law to ban these gatherings, but so far couldn't find a reason to justify such a decree)
Konoha was still rebuilding itself after Orochimaru's second invasion coupled with the attack of Akatsuki. The Hidden Leaf had barely defeated both forces, but with the timely arrival of the sand shinobi led by the Kazekage of the Sand, aka Gaara, they had crushed Orochimaru's second Sound invasion. In a surprising turn of events, it had been Sasuke himself who killed traitorous former Leaf Sannin. Apparently Sasuke had known that his mentor was using him all along, and had used the façade as the avenger willing to use any means necessary to attain power to get the training necessary to kill his brother. The snake Sannin had ridden in on Manda with Sasuke riding shotgun next to him and had proceeded to destroy anything in his path. The forces from Sound had followed in the path of destruction left by the snake boss summon and engaged anyone lucky enough to avoid the massive serpent.
Orochimaru had continued his destruction unchallenged until he reached the Hokage's office. As the rookie nine and the two loyal Sannin's prepared to fight to the bitter end, the quiet Sasuke had thrust a chidori through the traitorous Sannin's back. The shocked (quite literally given the thousands volts being sent through is body) Sannin did not even have time to curse his apprentice, before he was swallowed by Manda under Sasuke's orders. The gargantuan snake had then turned around and proceeded to attack the shocked Sound forces. At this point, Gaara and his troops had arrived just in time to flank the fleeing Sound ninja. Trapped with nowhere to run, the Sound forces had fought to the last man, though there were many who were felled with a kunai to the back as they attempted to flee. The forces of Hidden Village of Sound had been eradicated that day, and without a military to defend it's borders, Sound itself became annexed by Tea country it's neighbor.
Another surprise had been when the supposed traitor Uchiha had walked up to Naruto and the two had hugged like long lost brothers. Apparently Naruto had known about Sasuke's plan all along, which was why he had let him leave after the battle at Valley of the End. With Sound village defeated and Orochimaru dead, the people of Leaf and Sand set out to celebrate their hard earned peace. It was during this celebration that Akatsuki had struck. The rookie nine plus Gaara and the two remaining Sanins had managed just barely to defeat the feared forces of Akatsuki. Sasuke got his revenge, and demon vessels around the world could sleep easier knowing that Akatsuki was gone.
Now, a year later, Tsunade sat in her office reflecting as she waited for the tardy Kakashi (not that she was suprised, if he had arrived early she would have attacked immedietly knowing that it was an imposter coming in to assassinate her). In a year's time, the now famous rookie nine (why were they called that when there were actually twelved of them? It's like Gai's team simply got smooshed in there, but everyone still refered to them as the rookie nine when cleary they were talking about twelve people, it baffled Tsunade to no end) was one of the most respected groups in Konoha. They had proven their skills in the face of danger, and shown that not one of them feared to risk their lives for the safety of their village. Neji and Tenten were engaged with a baby girl on the way. Lee had been asked to be the godfather of the child, which had sent the emotionally unstable boy into a fit of tears that had been smothered into the shoulder of a equally bawling Gai which led to the couple having second thoughts about their decision. Shino and Kiba were both still bachelors, but Kiba's animalistic nature seemed to rake in the ladies looking to take a ride on the wild side, though if anyone were to keep tally, more women were interested in Akamaru due to his unusual size which made for a great conversation starter for the Inuzaka. After Shino had accidentally dropped his shades one day while tripping over a log someone had carelessly left behind after a hurrided kawrimi (Jiraiya escaping some angry kunoichi after being caught peeping again) and revealing his entrancing baby blue eyes, he now had fan club rivaling the last Uchiha's. The silent bug user could often be seen sprinting away from huge mobs of women chasing after him with cameras, which begs the question how the civilian women managed to keep up with a well trained shinobi like Shino.
Hinata had finally gathered up the courage to ask Naruto out, and the happy couple was now going steady, and knowing the clueless idiot Naruto, they would be going steady for a very long time. Shikamaru and Temari were married as well, but didn't plan on having kids any time soon. The Nara's exact words had been, "Too troublesome." Those words were of course followed by a week long ban from his wife's bed much to his regret, but as he pointed out while shouting into the shut bedroom door, kicking him out of the bedroom wasn't exactly going to help their chances of getting her pregnant. The most surprising couple had been Ino and Chouji. Apparently, Ino didn't mind "big boned" men, and after catching Chouji eyeing her shyly when he thought she wasn't' looking had decided to ask her long time friend out as more than just friends. In a surprising turn of events from their childhood, it was Sasuke now who was attempting to woo Sakura without success much to the hilarity of the rest of the rookie nine. It seemed the pink haired kunoichi was determined to make the boy suffer for all his prior refusals to date her back in their genin days.
Tsunade was snapped out of her thoughts by the arrival of the infamous copy cat ninja, Kakashi Hatake. "There was this cat stuck in the tree, and well I couldn't just leave it there. And once I got it down, I had to find its owner…." Tsunade observed the thirty plus year old genius through narrowed eyes.
"Enough Kakashi! We go through this every time I order you to my office. I have given up hope that you will ever arrive on time." The silver haired jounin rubbed the back of his head sheepishly and gave a nervous chuckle. His habits of being late were so well known it was incorporated into his bingo book file, and more than once he had been attacked by his comrades when he did arrive early, so it wasn't like he didn't want to be early sometimes, he just couldn't be without risking his life.
"I have a new mission for you Kakashi, S-ranked." Kakshi raised his single visible eyebrow before pulling out his favorite orange little book. Flipping to the page with the marker, he began reading with his normal eye seeming to completely ignoring the woman before him.
"Why not give it to Naruto Hokage-sama? The poor boy is dying for another S-rank, and I've done my fair share of them." Tsunade sighed and stood up. She walked over to the window that allowed the 5th to observe the village and stared out lost in thought. A perverted giggle from Kakashi drew another sigh from her.
"Naruto can't do this mission, simply because he can't handle it." Kakshi blinked and looked up from his favorite novel when he heard the Godaime's answer.
"With all due respect Hokage-sama, if Naruto can't do it, what chance do I have of completing it? In every manner necessary of being a shinobi, he has surpassed me. There are rumors that he may be the 6th Hokage, younger than even the 4th!" The 5th sighed again, before sitting down on her chair leaning her head on one hand.
"I know the rumors, and they are totally unfounded. The boy certainly has the power necessary to become Hokage, but he doesn't have the patience. And this is exactly why I'm sending you on this mission. This task requires one with an infinite amount of patience, and the ability to keep a secret." She stared unblinkingly at the masked ninja. "If not for the involvement of national secret, then I would classify this as B-ranked at most. In fact, Iruka would be the best for this mission, but I can't pull him away from the academy. I would send Kurenai and Asuma, but they are on their honeymoon, Gai is well…..You know Gai. Unless I need something smashed out of existance, he's out of the question. Anko is still on her latest assignment, and none of the younger generation can pull it off due to their age, not without constantly being under a henge anyways, and Naruto is the only one who could pull that off. That leaves you Kakashi, the only one with enough skill to pull it off and fits our client's needs."
Kakashi blinked and returned to reading his dirty book. "So what exactly am I doing, and what's the big secret nobody's supposed to know about?" The Godaime laced her fingers in front of her face and stared at the masked shinobi.
"What I am about to tell you doesn't leave the office." Kakashi smiled under his mask and mimed zipping his lips together over his mask.
"Our world as we know it is not what it seems." Kakashi blinked, and turned his full attention to the Hokage. "It is in fact much larger. The lands of the shinobi are actually just one of eight other continents on the planet." Kakashi raised his eyebrow. He snapped his book shut, then leaned forward to place a hand on the Godaime's forehead and frowned.
"Odd. You seem fine. Perhaps you should take a break from all the paperwork Tsunade-sama." Snarling and swatting Kakashi's hand away, Tsunade stood up and slammed her hands onto her desk causing the much abused furniture to buckle and groan in protest.
"I'm not joking around here Kakashi!" she yelled, vein pulsing in her forehead. Kakashi took a step back slowly, warily eyeing the quivering Sannin. Angry women were hard to deal with, at least with Anko she'd channel her anger into either killing him or screwing his brains out all night long (sometimes he provoked her hoping that she'd pick the second option as her outlet for her frustration), but chances were Tsunade would just put him through a wall and there was only one blonde in the village who was capable of walking that off due mostly to his freakish regenrative abilities, but also from having had many experiences of being bitch slapped through walls. Kakashi had the wrong hair color to be risking the Hokage's ire. He sat back down and put his book into the pouch where it always rest when not in the hands of its owner.
"You best explain from the start Tsunade-sama." Tsunade sighed and sat back down as well.
"As you know Kakashi, history tells us that the world of the shinobi had been once inhabited centuries ago by civilized cultures that had built great cities and monuments. But they had fallen to war, and many of the small factions had used their power and technology to summon demons. Each new demon summoned had to be more powerful then the last and a total of nine were summoned before our predecessors lost control of them. And thus began the beginning of the end of civilization. After the great massacre, the demons had become dormant, and the survivors scattered far and wide taking what little they had. Over the years, these survivors settled in area are that will one day become the great elemental nations." The one eyed shinobi nodded.
"Yes, that's what we are taught in history, but I'm guessing there's more?" Tsunade grunted an affirmation.
"History made it out so that it seemed that the shinobi lands were the only ones on our planet. If you were to sail to the edge of the world, there is a barrier that allows none to pass. But the truth is, we are but one great continent of the eight that exist in the world. For some reason or another, our forefathers saw fit to close themselves off from the outside world. Perhaps the outside world was a desolate place with no chance of survival, or perhaps our forefathers were arrogant and thought themselves too elite to mingle amongst commoners. All that is known for sure is that they erected a barrier around our continent, and have chosen to isolate themselves away from the rest of the world. And now, after so many centuries of communication silence, we at last have contact with the outside."
Kakashi stared. Then he blinked. He seemed to be doing a lot of that today. "So what exactly is my mission?"
"It's quite simple Kakashi. An old man who claimed to be an outsider had come requesting a mission, a mission that is to take place outside our continent. He is willing to pay quite a sum, enough to help repair Konoha and more. Hell, the down payment alone is enough to stabilize our economy after the Akatsuki and Sound invasion. Your mission is simple, you will go to this man's school, where you will pass yourself off as a teacher and protect the students there until the mission is over."
Kakashi pulled out his little book and began reading again mind calming now that they were in more familiar territory. He was no stranger to protection missions, often shinobi were required to play many roles when undergoing such assignments though being a teacher would be a new experience. "What am I supposed to teach school children? I'm a shinobi. The closest thing to teaching I've ever down was taking on my brats, and they pretty much broke up and found their own way in the world before I even got used to having them around let alone teaching them anything."
"This is not just any civilian school, it's a school that teaches the students how to control chakra." A silver eyebrow, the only one visible, shot up at the unexpected announcement.
"Well, not in the way we use it, but from what I've seen of our client, they use a little stick to channel their chakra. Very ineffective I know, but the things they can do with it! The old man changed my desk into a pig and back again!" Kakashi starred at his leader and contemplated whether she was crazy or not. Oh well, it's not like he had anything better to do. With Anko away on a mission, coupled with his students tangled up in their love lives (in Kiba's case a love pentagon), he had quite frankly been…. well bored. Maybe going away on a mission to an exotic place never seen by anyone in centuries was exactly what he needed to knock himself out of this funk brought on by peacetime. It was either that or amuse himself with attempts to assassinate the Raikage, and that wasn't exactly beneficial to the peace.
"So who is our client anyways?"
Tsunade heaved an exasperated sigh of relief. "So you believe me?"
"Let's pretend I said yes." Tsunade sighed again, but this time it was accompanied with a soft smile.
"I'll introduce you to him now." Kakashi single eye tracked the Godaime as she walked over to the fireplace. He watched with interest as she placed some dry wood in it. She then unleashed a minor Katon jutsu igniting the kindling, and began searching the shelf above the fireplace. After grabbing a pouch, she warned Kakashi not to do anything stupid. A pinch of green powder from the bag turned the blazing fire emerald. The roar of the green flames was unnaturally loud and seemed to expand to encompass the entire fireplace.
What happened next left him speechless. And he had never been speechless before. Well, except for that time where Naruto had dropped his pants in front of the Third and mooned the old man for all his worth for giving them another D-ranker, but that was an understandable exception. Tsunade had stuck her head into the fire! He leapt forward to pull her back, but there was no need. She had withdrawn her head and seemed perfectly fine, not a single strand of blond hair out of place.
"Stand back Kakashi." His body on autopilot with his mind preoccupied, he felt himself take a few steps back. He knew he should have been a few hours later. Maybe she would have handed this mission off to Gai and he could be off planning the Raikage's downfall.