"So what? I'm still a Marshal, I've got my cop moves and I don't need you and guess what? I'm havin more fun and now that we're done, I'm gonna show you tonight, I'm all right, I'm just fine and you're a fool so, so what?"

-So what?


He had his arms wrapped around Mary, his chin resting on her blonde hair. He sighed. They were lying on top of the covers of her bed, he intertwined his fingers with hers, carefully as not to scare her away as quickly as she had come running,


"What?" he asked, fearing he was making her uncomfortable.

She hesitated, adjusting in his arms,

"I, uh, have a confession to make." She half smirked.


"Well, when you- After the balcony… I." Mary stuttered.

"That dreaded balcony." Marshall joked.

"Yeah well, let's just say, I was suffering from a serious case of denial, I.. I got really really… drunk." He looked at her quizzically, "Don't look at me like that! Norah was with Mark, but after Stan's going away party, I just… lost it. You were… gone. Stan was gone. Brandi, she's all pregnant so, kind of busy. I ended up throwing back to many tall glasses of some red wine…"

"It happens Mare, We both had our fair share of alcohol that night at the bar, you had a right to be upset, you just chose to handle it in an unsafe way."

"I stole a lawn mower Marshall."

He bit his tongue, contorting his face, trying not to laugh,

"You did what?" he asked.

"You heard me doofus, a lawn mower. Three houses down, I had to convince him not to call the cops when I returned it the next morning."

"What did you do with said grass cutting vehicle?" he smiled.

"I drove it, what else can you do with a ride on mower?" she quipped, "I contemplated driving it to your house, but I didn't feel like waking up the greater part of Albuquerque because they all thought some asshole was mowing their lawn at two in the morning. Don't get me wrong, I assume it was great fun… But I woke up, in my back yard, with one hell of a hangover and no recollection of the pathetic act of grand theft auto I committed. Until, I found my mini-van parked in my driveway and the lawn mower in the garage… My grass never looked better. God knows how the hell I managed to mow in a straight line."

"What does any of this have to do with me?" he chuckled.

"My head felt like it was gonna explode and my favorite jacket had grass stains on it, so I was gonna call you- but then I realized, you didn't want me to do that anymore…I realized that I was angry that you didn't want me to come around anymore, I realized it hurt. And the crimes I had committed that previous night was me lashing out at myself for not having the god damn gull to tell you… how I felt that is." She paused, sighing in his arms, "I was soo angry, and in my hung over rage, I cut down one of my trees in the backyard…"

"Because nothing says migraine remedy like the roar of a chainsaw…" Marshall joked, "How did you manage to not involve Brandi, where was she? And where in the world did you procure a chainsaw anyway? I helped you move and I know for a fact that you own no tools… not even a hammer."

"Brandi was with my mother, she had spent the night before at my mother's because Jinx had taken the day off to bring her to her ultrasound appointment weeks ago… As for the chainsaw, it came from the same neighbor I stole the mower from, he must have been a little freaked out, I can only imagine what I looked like at ten in the morning on his doorstep, my hair up, caked in mud and covered in leaves from the bush I had slept in…. But anyway, he let me borrow it. Needless to say I have to replace a giant chunk of my fence..." she looked up at him, "I was a mess. It sounds ridiculous; I'm not denying how farfetched any of this sounds to you. If you don't believe a word I said, fine, I can understand where you're coming from. I just had to let you know the level of psycho I got to after you left… I n- need you." She stuttered.

"Mary, everything's okay now-

"I love you Marshall, and I want you to understand how well I didn't do living without you. I had to get a new phone- well the same phone, still a blackberry, but I smashed it to bits, throwing it at a wall during your 'wedding' … I made Brandi drive my car to get Norah, and then I jumped into the coldest shower I had ever taken, trying to convince myself that everything would be fine, when it wasn't. My weekend was spent replying 'so what' to everyone. I didn't want to talk, I couldn't. My brain was filled with lies, I told myself over and over the way it was would blow over and Norah and I would be happy again, alone. But after Norah got sick, I got a taste of what it felt like to be utterly alone again, and then you came. You actually came."

Marshall was clearly quite taken aback by her reaction to his affection. She never talked about how she felt- never. She refused on all occasions to express any emotions toward anyone or anything.

"Perhaps motherhood has softened you." He suggested, kissing her forehead gently.

"Yeah, sure, motherhood made me realize I wanted you, but didn't stop me from swiping an expensive piece of yard manicuring machinery and sawing down a perfectly healthy tree… Yeah you must be right Marshall." Mary replied sarcastically.

"Whatever made you realize… I am thankful for." He grinned.

"So, do you still love me or do you think I'm too psycho to be loved?"

"Of course I do." He caressed her cheek gently.

"So what do you think about it all? The mower, the tree…"

Mary awaited his response; she could see his eyes sparkling with the sea of answers he could have come up with. He pecked her on the lips, caressing her cheek again with his fingertips,

"So what?" he asked.

Well, I did this, trying to be light hearted and funny and if you've seen the music video, you'll understand more! Review! Sorry it took sooo long, Check out my (fairly) new fic, Her Moment of Weakness!