Disclaimer: Saw, and all related characters are property of their rightful legal owners- this is a work of fiction used for entertainment purposes only. Not profit.
Warning: T Rated. This is also a slash fanfiction featuring Adam/Lawrence. Meaning gay relationship stuff... you have been warned!
Authors Notes: Adam and Lawrence have just spent the night together... this story being rated T, I decided to skip the details and start this chapter in the morning after. But if there's enough interest later on, I may add a more graphic scene as a standalone.
A quiet contemplation. That's what Lawrence needed. Just a little time to digest what had happened and accept it at his own terms. After all, such a dramatic, life-changing turn of events would surely result in a midlife crisis in a man less at peace than he was. But it wouldn't seem Lawrence would be getting that time to think things through any time soon.
"Adam..?" He sat up, the bed sheets falling passed his naked torso. He gripped the sheets to his chest in a somewhat effeminate show of modesty. The flash of the camera had disturbed him from his thoughts in a less than gentle way. Adam said nothing. He was sat, cross-legged at the foot of the bed, camera in hand, taking pictures of Lawrence in bed. "W-What are you doing?" He was again met by an uncomfortable silence that was certainly not welcomed the morning after such intimate events occured the night before. Adam was smiling, Lawrence noted. Which made him lower his guard some, and in dropping the sheets, proceeded to gaze intently at his lover through hazy morning eyes.
"I'm parachute jumping... what's it look like?" Adam scoffed in a way that was not so much sarcastic, but a warming return to his usual self that Lawrence wanted so badly the night before. "I'm making memories man." Another flash made Lawrence blink suddenly but also smile in an amused way. He hadn't felt this way in such a long time. Romance. It felt a lifetime ago when he had first started dating Alison out of med school. And as he and Adam were creating new memories. Old ones came to Lawrence rudely interrupting the calm contentment that had consumed them.
"So..." Alison said, looking down to the pavement as they walked hand-in-hand. The rain had cleared and the night time streetlamps and neon billboards were reflecting their glow in the street. She was dressed like spring; in greens and yellows that flowed from her airy dress as they strolled along the boulevard. Lawrence in a light pink button-shirt and smart black pants and shoes. They were they type of couple that when passing eyes met them, they were filled with smiles and pleasant nods. A nice couple with the future clear and bright.
"So..?" He looked at her, their eyes meeting as they crossed up from the pavement. Both were smiling. Not an ounce of regret coming through to spoil their evening.
"Tonight was nice." She said, tilting her head and reajusting her hair. Lawrence smiled. He liked looking at her. She was a vision. A piece of art that was constantly changing and never boring to the eye. Her hair was her natural brown but straightened from it's usual delicate curls. One thing he knew from first glance at his date, was that she took pride in her appearance; a trait they shared. Though sharing this common attribute, they were not vain. Alison changed her appearance frequently. She liked to feel fresh and new, it gave her a positive attitude. Lawrence was always smart and charming. He liked to leave a good impression- making friends was better than making enemies, he thought. "I gotta say... when Julie set me up with you, I thought you were just gonna be some snotty, holier-than-thou student doctor... but you-you surprised me."
"Thank-you. I try my best my fair maiden." Lawrence did his best Robin Hood saving maid Marian impression. He looked a little dorky, she thought, but a nice guy. She laughed.
"Oh god, don't do that when we meet my parents." Alison leaned against him as they walked. And he smiled back at her, They were happy.
A happy memory. But stained by bitterness and resentment that made the shine of their happiness dull.
"Earth to Lawrence... you alive man?" He looked up, seeing Adam, still with that smirk that made his insides fill with butterflies. The glaze in his eyes cleared and he saw Adam once again. 'God he's sexy' thought Lawrence absent-mindedly, surprising himself.
"Hmm?" He replies quickly, trying not to let on to the fact that he couldn't stop his eyes wandering across Adams shirtless form. Adam quirked his brow and looked at Lawrence oddly.
"You Ok?" He finally asked, looking down immediately, trying to detatch himself from any mixed feeling he may have. He busied himself, scrolling through the pictures on the digital camera Lawrence had bought him. He dreaded Lawrences response; should it be that he regretted last night ever happened or that he was having second thoughts about the way they were headed. But Lawrence, sitting up full and leaning forth, took him from any worries by taking his face gently in both hands and kissed him softly on the mouth. Adam looked up, feeling his cheeks heating up, Lawrences warm blue eyes were soft and welcoming as his smile.
"I'm perfect." He said, leaning forth and kissing him once again just left of his mouth before sliding his lips across to brush against Adams while his hands stroked at his hair. "You?"
Adam swallowed hard. He'd half-expected Lawrence to come to his senses and kick him out of bed. And he had no reponse to give. He could only nod, hoping this moment could never end. Adam was gently lowered on to his back, with Lawrence on top. This time though, Adam kissed back. Their mouths locked together as did their bodies in a tight embrace entangled in the bed sheets. Things were getting hot for them. Tongues carressed each other. Fingers gripped hair. Hips rocked against each other. Sweat gleaming, and panting breaths... interrupted by incessant knocking on the front door. They broke apart with a reluctant sigh.
"Damn..." Lawrence looked into Adams eyes, apology and embarressment making themselves known. Adam nodded, trying to look like he wasn't severely disappointed as Lawrence hurried off Adam and hobbled about pulling on a pair of jeans and a casual white shirt. It was the weekend now and he wasn't expected at work. He was rather hoping to spend time with Adam, but this intrusion must first be dealt with he thought. The knocking grew more impatient, and so had Lawrences usually calm temper. He rushed downstairs, not bothering to look in a mirror; His hair was stuck out in places and he had a look on his face like he'd just been pulled away from having sex- which he had. Adam was in no rush, at first he just lay on the bed, trying not to think sexy thoughts still tasting Lawrence in his mouth. But he too had to face annoyance and sat up; he was already wearing jeans he pulled on before Lawrence had woke up. He didn't like people looking at him in such a vulnerable state, even with the trust he held in Lawrence- he still felt awkward to not be wearing anything. Adam, having not really moved in with Lawrence yet, was lacking a wardrobe selection and so without thinking too much, grabbed a shirt from the floor, which after buttoning he realised it was Lawrences from the night before. He shrugged, figuring he'd not mind too much.
"Oh, god..." Lawrence stopped dead at the front door, a cold sweat dripping from his forehead. He saw Alisons car through the window. "Not today." He wiped his forehead and quickly adjusted his hair and shirt to make it less obvious that he'd just gotten out of bed with someone. If she knew how quickly he'd moved on... well... she probably wouldn't be too happy. He exhaled deeply and composed himself before opening the door.
"Well..." Alison stood there. Looking stunning as usual; hair dyed blonde again (her favourite) and dressed in splendid designer jeans and green tank-top. No matter what she wore, she seemed to suit. Her eyes were shielded by designer shades. Even he had to admit, despite his newfound sexual preference- she looked gorgeous. "About time." She said quietly. Lawrence cocked his head; 'no argument? No sarcastic words?' Something was off. She was actually being civil. Judging by Lawrences expression and silence, Alison figured he had forgotten their agreement. "Oh, great... don't tell me you forgot?" She said, shaking her head. 'Forgot? Forgot what?' He wondered.
"Daddy!" And then he saw; Their beautiful young daughter, dressed in bright yellow and carrying a backpack, came bounding down the driveway from Alisons car. His heart was filled with glee.
"Oh Diana sweetheat!" Lawrence smiled bright and dropped to his knees, taking his daughter into his arms. Alison, with all her spite for her soon-to-be ex-husband, had to smile too. The heartwarming reunion was something to be admired. She never forgot how attached they were to each other, and she would never deny her child access to her own father. Never. "I am so happy to see you..." It was then he remembered.
"You said you'd watch her this weekend remember?" Alison whispered, trying her hardest not to let Diana hear that her father had forgotten such an important promise. Lawrence ended the hug, standing and taking Dianas small hand in his.
"Of course." He said, looking down at the gleefull little girl. He had forgot. And he hated himself for it. Really did. He couldn't believe it. But then again, he'd gone through alot lately and it wasn't that much of a shock when he thought about it. But that didn't stop himself from feeling guilty. "Now, Diana... why don't you go to your room and unpack your things." He smiled at her, and she smiled back, breaking free of his hand to race inside. "Hey! Say goodbye to your mom first." He chuckled and stroked her hair as Diana giggled, rushing out to hug her mother.
"Bye baby." She kissed her cheek. "Be good for your daddy. I love you." Alison watched as her daughter made her way inside the house, leaving her alone with and awkward looking Lawrence. "So..." she said, lookng down the the front porch.
"So..?" He repeated, following her eyes to the ground. It was uncomfortable for both of them now. It wasn't the same.
"Are you ok Larry?" She asked, looking up after flipping her hair to one side.
"Uh... yeah... yeah, I am." He said, rubbing the back of his neck. It was clear they weren't ready to talk divorce yet, so Alison simply nodded and turned back to walk up the driveway to her car. Lawrence watched as she drove away, he felt a piece of his heart had grown wings and flown free from his body. Things shouldn't have got this bad between them.
Diana had had the talk. Both of her parents had not so long ago sat down with her and said they were having problems and although they both still loved her, they were no longer in love with each other and that it was nobody's fault. She took the news hard. Her life had changed, her parents no longer loved each other. She couldn't comprehend. But come time, she understood that she'd still see Lawrence and they were still a family even though they didn't live together.
Racing upstairs to her room, Diana came to a sudden halt, running into a man as she turned a corner. She was terrified. The last time she saw men in the shadows... well... it didn't bring back good memories for someone so young. She gasped, her breath caught in her throught. She couldn't scream.
"Shit. Diana? It's me Adam, don't you remember me?" Adam crouched down to look her face to face. Diana wiped away tears and nodded. "Okay... Um... so your staying here huh?" She nodded again, hugging her backpack. "Heh, me too." He laughed embarrassed. He felt bad, he didn't mean to scare her. Desperately, Adam showed her his camera. "Hey lookie here. Know what this is Diana?"
She nodded. "It's a camera?" She said, wiping her tears again, feeling at ease with Adam.
"Yeah it is... so, you wanna come take pictures with me? The parks nice this time of year." He chuckled and looked up at her bright eyed. But she shook her head.
"I-I have to put my things in my room." She said, still standing there.
Adam nodded, standing. "I'm sorry I scared you." He said. "Your dad let me stay here last night and... and I guess he forgot to tell me you were coming." Diana suddenly, seeing Adams sadness, smiled, and in a role-reversal moment, took his hand and went strolling with him to her room.
"It's alright Adam. I wasn't scared." She was smiling, Adam noted, and this made Adam feel free of the guilt he had brought on by walking into her in the dark hallway, he smiled too and opened the door to her room. "Wanna help me put my bears in bed?"
Adam had to double-take. "Uhh... what now?"
Closing the front door. Lawrence had time to reflect. It appeared their divorce would be soon to follow, but neither of them had the courage to bring it up. Though he suspected Alison wouldn't wait forever, she wanted to move on. And so did he. It was just a pity it had to happen in such a bad way. His obsession with work had almost gotten all of them killed. There was no way back from that. It was just too painful. But at least now, even with the seperation; no-one was alone. They all had someone to suppoert and to be supported by. Alison had Diana. Diana had Alison and Lawrence. And Lawrence and Adam had each other. Then it hit him. He'd forgotten someone else. "Adam."
Racing up the stairs his face was red, he'd never be able to explain a naked guy sleeping in his bed to his young daughter. Cursing in his head he moved as fast as he could down the hallway and passing Diana's room he made his way to Adam in the master bedroom. But something caught his eye. In Dianas room were Adam and Diana; sat on her bed, playing with a collection of stuffed bears and animals. He sighed in relief, leaning against the doorframe, watching with interest.
"No Adam, silly! That's not Daddy Bear... That's Mommy Bear. See? Pink ribbons." She giggled and smushed Baby Bears nose against Mommy Bears' that Adam was holding.
"Oh yeah... Doh!" He said with a chuckle. "Ahem... Baby Bear you need to finish your soup or you'll go hungry." Diana broke out into a fit of giggles hearing Adam attempt to sound like a woman.
"Hey Daddy!" Diana said, surprising Adam, who turned to see Lawrence standing in the doorframe trying not to laugh. Diana jumped off the bed and went to hug her father.
"Having fun with Adam hm?" He was trying so hard not to explode with laughter at Adams childish behaviour. Diana nodded excitedly. "Okay honey, go downstairs and hang up your jacket, I need to talk to Mommy Bear- I mean, Adam for a sec, ok?" Adam shot Lawrence a death-glare. Diana nodded and Lawrence patted her head and she went off downstairs again.
Adam didn't move, still sitting on the bed holding Mommy Bear. Lawrence sat in front of him. It was another of those silences.
"Don't fucking say anything." Adam said, a growling undertone to his voice. Lawrence had nothing to say. He swallowed, feeling terrible for forgetting both that he daughter was coming over, and that when she did, forgetting that Adam was here.
"I'm sorry." He finally said, picking up Daddy Bear and nose-kissing the other stuffed bear Adam held. Adam felt a sting in his eyes.
"Don't... just... we'll talk later." Lawrence felt his heart break a little, he hated how much hurt he could bring so unintentionally. In his mind he saw the same memories of him and Alison and the same insincere apologies. No. This wasn't the same. He wouldn't make the same mistakes.
"Daddy Bear's sorry Adam." Lawrence said, a smile creeping to his face as he took control of the stuffed bear and gave it a voice and life. Adam rolled his eyes. "He can just be a bit insensitive at times." Adam scoffed.
"He's also thoughtless." Adam said, dropping Mommy Bear and crossing his arms. Lawrence let out a light breath as he smiled much more openly, putting down the Daddy Bear and dropping the wall to his emotion.
"True... but I am sorry." Lawrence pushed himself closer and with graceful ease, cupped Adams face in his hands, gently stroking his nose against his in a live-action simulation of the bear mommy and daddy nose-kissing. Adam closed his eyes, finding it hard to stay mad at Lawrence, he couldn't help but snicker under his breath. He looked up again and their eyes met again. Showing only love to each other.
"Mommy Bear- I mean- I... forgive you."
And with that, Lawrence kissed Adam, conveying every piece of love in his heart that he'd dare show.
As this occurred, the energetic little girl came bounding up the stairs and down the hallway, full of smiles and glee stopped in her tracks at the doorway to her room. And she saw.
She saw her father Lawrence and Adam parting from a tender moment that was not meant for her eyes.