Summary: From the living room to the bedroom. Post Always.
Spoilers: You guessed it, spoilers for Always.
Disclaimer: I do not own Castle, 'cause if I did, obviously they would be making out ALL THE TIME.
A/N: Yes, this is yet another end to post-Always story (with sex). I started it right after the episode while basically watching the last two minutes on a repeating loop. Planning on it being a two part story with the second chapter from Castle's perspective. Incorporated dialogue from the episode.
Reviews are always appreciated.
He hadn't answered his phone when she called, although she was not surprised. She was already in the elevator of his building, hoping to talk to him before she showed up at his front door. She did not know if he was screening his calls or simply out, but she had to try. She knocked on the door, glad to know already that no one else would be at the loft tonight.
Surprisingly, the door opened, and there he was standing there.
His face fell as he set eyes on her, and Kate's heart plummeted into her stomach. "Beckett, what do you want?"
She was no longer Kate? So they were back to Beckett? She supposed she deserved that.
Soaked from the rain, she should have been shivering in his doorway, but she was warmed by the sight of him. She was having trouble with her voice but managed to get out the most basic answer to his fundamental question.
She moved towards him, bringing up her hands to capture his face. He took two steps back, as though to retreat from the assault, but she managed to catch his lips with hers. His fingertips brushed her arms then flailed to the side, undecided, and she pulled back just enough to rest her forehead on his and grip his shoulders to steady herself.
"I'm so sorry, Castle," Kate whispered. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."
Sorry for hurting you, for lying about what I remembered. Sorry for what I said at my apartment; I was such a fool. Sorry for waiting so long to do this.
She moved to kiss him again, but had barely touched him when he grabbed her and pushed her firmly back. Tears were streaming down her face. Tears of joy? Tears of apology? She wasn't even sure.
His expression betraying confusion, uncertainty, and hope? – Castle asked one question, "What happened?"
"He got away, and I didn't care," she said matter-of-factly. "I almost died, and all I could think about was you."
She shook her head, wondering how she could have ever turned this man away. This beautiful, soulful, loving man who had been there for her for four years. He was everything in the world she wanted. He was all she wanted any more. And after so much time, so many cases, so much laughter and so much pain, she had to tell him.
"I just want you," Kate confessed.
She wanted to make love to him, to wake up in his bed in the morning, to bring him coffee and eat his pancakes. She wanted everything with him. But at that moment, she just wanted to kiss him again.
Leaning forward, she tried again to kiss him, to capture his mouth with her lips. He pulled away slightly, and she was left feeling desperate and needy. But she did not care. She was desperate and needy. She desperately needed him.
As lightening crashed in the background, she touched her fingers to his face, hoping to give him some idea how much she wanted him.
A second later, her back made contact with the door, pushing it shut and providing them with both privacy and a conveniently flat surface to rest against. Kate could barely keep herself on her feet after such a physically and emotionally draining day. But none of that mattered because Castle was kissing her.
Finally, he was kissing her.
His lips were on her mouth, then at her neck and shoulder. His arms were wrapped around her, his hands on her face, on her body. It was a lover's embrace as they moved against each other, tasting, touching, unable to get enough. Kate's knees started to buckle, but Castle kept her upright, gave her support and stability as she swam in the sensations caused by the feel of him.
Then he was kissing her chest, his hands suddenly hesitant as he reached to unbutton her blouse. But he only undid one button, just enough to see the small puckered scar between her breasts. The scar she had agonized over in her own mirror, the one she wished she would never have to show him. The one he clearly had wanted to see. And suddenly, Kate did not care any more if he did see it. It was a part of her now, just as he was. One hand came up, and his thumb brushed against the scar as he cupped her through the bra and shirt.
As his hands caressed her breasts, his mouth sought out hers, desperate and seeking reassurance. And suddenly Kate realized, this moment was a year overdue. They should have done this when she got out of the hospital. She should have given him this reassurance then, rather than months of the cold shoulder.
It was a second chance, or rather another chance – she had been given so many second chances. Her last chance and she had no intention of wasting it.
Pulling back from him slightly, Kate grinned at him with unabashed love. Then her fingers found his, entwining themselves. She gave him a look she knew he would understand and led him towards his bedroom.
He followed her, but he looked at her as though she might vanish before his eyes. To assure him she was real, she stopped in the hall and pushed him against the wall before kissing him again. Her blouse was already partially unbuttoned, so she pulled his hands to it as an invitation to finish removing the garment. He immediately complied, and within seconds she was left standing before him in her black lace bra.
They kissed again, and Kate took the opportunity to divest him of his shirt. However, her hands shook as they fumbled for the buttons, the rain having soaked her through and leaving her cold and trembling. But she pressed on, even considered ripping the shirt from his body, but could not bring herself to do it. Castle valued his clothes, and she had already ruined enough.
By the time she got the shirt off, his mouth was on her again and his hands were seeking out the expanse of her skin left bare. He was wearing an undershirt and her fingers crept up the back of it as she tried to pull it over his head. But Castle had other ideas as he swept her around, putting her back to the wall again as he plundered her exposed skin with his mouth and tongue, warming her and infusing her with his heat.
"Castle," she breathed his name.
"God, I love you," he responded, bringing his lips to hers again.
"Bedroom," she whispered back. "I want you."
Somehow, they got to his bedroom, although half way there she would have been content with the couch or his office desk or even the floor. She would have settled for up against the wall except she could barely support herself, and Castle seemed too shell-shocked by the whole turn of events to support them both.
Pulling his under shirt off, she discovered his well muscled chest and arms. How had they never done this before? They both shimmied out of their pants, and soon they were on the bed in nothing but their underwear, kissing and touching, tasting and discovering. He held her in his arms as he reached behind her to undo the clasp on her bra. Removing it with ease, he replaced the lacy material with his mouth, and she gasped and arched against him. As he sucked and teased, her fingers wound in his hair and she could feel him against her, hard and insistent.
"I want you," Kate said again, her voice barely audible at first. She tried again. "Castle, please," she begged.
He pulled himself up, bringing his face so close to hers that their noses almost touched. "What do you want, Kate?" he asked, his question a much gentler, sexier version of what he'd asked her when he opened his front door.
"You. I want you."
And then his boxers were gone, followed by her panties, and he was hot and solid inside her. The feeling blinded her such that her vision was filled only with him. Her fingers gripped his back desperately as he moved, slowly at first, letting her get used to the feel of him.
It had been so long for her – no one in a year. No one but her own hand and fantasies about a partner she wanted desperately but could not bear to ruin things with by starting a relationship too soon. A man she needed but could not go to broken and afraid.
Was this too soon?
Didn't matter – they were together now, and she would just have to do her best not to screw it up. She almost had, but this was a second chance, the last of the second chances.
"Is this okay?" Castle asked, still moving with exquisite slowness, as though he was worried about hurting her. But Kate was no china doll.
"Faster," she requested, moving her hands to his back to encourage him as she pushed up to meet him.
Increasing the pace, Castle leaned down to kiss her, and she pulled his bottom lip into her mouth, teasing it with her teeth and tongue. He moved harder, more confident of what she wanted, what she needed.
"You feel amazing," he gasped in her ear, and she took the opportunity to gently suck on the skin of his neck, wanting to leave her mark on him.
She felt as though his body already knew hers, as though they had been lovers for years. Everything he did felt wonderful. Every place he touched lit her on fire. As she moved steadily closer to her end, he took each of her hands in his, intertwining their fingers as he pressed them into the mattress. She slid her legs around his waist, urging him deeper.
With an almost primal growl, she felt him driving her forward towards that edge and she knew he was close. Looking up at him above her, his face intent but also awash with enjoyment, she realized that was exactly where she belonged. His blue eyes sent her over, arching against him as she clung to his hands in desperation. He followed her, like one soul pulling the other into a waterfall of sensation. She heard him say her name, although she had no idea what she said in return. She had lost the ability to hear, to see, to even think – all she could do was feel as she rode waves of ecstasy in a sea of pleasure.
Afterwards, they collapsed together in a pile of tangled limbs, and Kate made no move to disentangle herself. She had spent so much time keeping her distance from Castle – always looking but never touching – that she had no wish to be separated from him now. Instead, she laid her head on his chest and listened intently to his heartbeat as it slowly calmed down from their exertions.
"I love you," she said, tentative and soft. He had already told her, she had lost count how many times, and she wanted him to hear it from her, no matter how much the idea terrified her.
"I love you, too," Castle answered. He waited for her to say more, perhaps to explain in more detail what had happened, why she had changed her mind. When she remained silent, he ventured, "We should talk."