Title: Starbucks

Summary: When Loki is taken back to Asgard after the Avengers defeat him Odin banishes him to live as a mere mortal in order to punish him for his wrong doings.
When an unbeatable force threatens earth Thor suggests the Avengers get Loki's help, he's gotta quit Starbucks first. Loki/anyone likely Loki/Tony
Rating: M
Characters: Loki/anyone possibly Tony/Loki in the future.
Genre: humor & fluff

x

"Damn these humans and their petty ways." Loki spat defiantly as he pulled the burning hot pan out of the oven without any gloves he threw it down on the counter and hissed in pain flailing his hands around to cool them.
"Careful bro. You need mitts for that man." His coworker not so helpfully declared as he filled a foam cup with steaming coffee. Loki scowled at him.
"Oh really? I hadn't figured that out. Man." He mockingly spat back. His coworker with long blonde hair hanging over his eyes snickered at him as he handed the coffee over to the customer.
"Hey. What were you talking about the other day? You're a God? Pffft." He replied laughing hysterically, Loki frowned at him and began planning ways to punish the mortal once he had earned his scepter and magical powers back.

"I am a God, you puny mortal, watch your tongue or I shall cut it out." He replied, this Matt, he had learned was the puny mortals name just shook his head and laughed.

"God man, you've got me cracking up over here." He replied and laughed thinking everything Loki ever said was a joke.

Loki rolled his eyes dramatically as he turned to the sink and ran cool water over his burned fingertips.

All he had to do is pretend to learn whatever lesson it was his 'Father' wanted him to learn and he could be back to plotting world takeover.

If only he had his scepter he could use it to travel between worlds, why Thor always had to take what was his was beyond him, damn his brother.

Loki wiped his hands on his green apron and hissed at the burn.

Damn it, if only he had his magic he could fix the damn things.

"Excuse me young man, I asked for a cappuccino this is just coffee black." An old woman complained over the counter at him.

"Tell it to someone who gives a damn, you old hag." Loki hissed back, the woman stared at him in shock before stepping back and stomping out of Starbucks. Apparently humans aren't used to being called out on their stupidity.

Loki turned to the pastries he had pulled out of the oven and attempted to place them in plastic containers to sell with a spatula, touching the pan again with his bare hand.

"Damn it!" he screamed and pulled his hand away, and scowled.

This would be so much easier with his magic, he could command them to get in their boxes.

"Loki, my dear brother." Loki's head snapped up as Thor entered the store the doorbell wringing as it opened.

Loki scowled at him as he looked at him over the glass covering the pastries on the counter.

"Thor." He greeted bitterly slipping on a pair of embarrassing mitts to hold the pan with as he scooped the cakes with the spatula.

"It would seem dear brother, you are warming up to this life. Are you not?" Thor asked and smiled too brightly.

"No!" Loki replied as he sat another pastry in a plastic container and pushed it to the side.

Thor frowned heavily disappointed, he had learned a lot on his voyage as a human, his brother was so very stubborn though. "I hate it here, they are so petty and foolish, how much longer must I endure this punishment?" he replied scraping a burnt cake off the pan.

"I am sorry for you my brother, but you must stay until father approves your return." He replied and frowned.

Thor had made it a habit to visit Loki at least once a day, Loki was getting very tired of this behavior.

He wished Thor would hate him like he is supposed to at this point.

"Oh go tell it to your father, someone who cares about your mewling." He replied exasperated, Thor not even slightly taken aback by his harsh words, it was a habit between them everyday was the same but he would never give up on his brother as long as he was alive.

"Our father." He corrected, Loki glared up at him behind heavy brows.

"Your father." He gritted back hatefully.

"Hey Thor, how's it hanging!" Matt called out from across the room where he was wiping a counter.

"Hello Mathew, how do you do?" Thor replied cheerfully and waved, Loki sighed and rolled his eyes annoyed, everyone loved Thor. Everyone.

"Good man, Good. Your bro here has had me laughing all day man, all day!" he replied and shook his head stepping closer to clap Loki on the shoulder.

Loki grit his teeth and glared at him over his shoulder, Matt not even phased by it as he made his way into the kitchen away from the counter.

"That one will be the first to die." Loki hissed carelessly tossing the boxes into the display counter with his free hand.

"Brother, you must try to learn from the humans, if you don't you shall never come home." Thor replied trying his best to convince him this was for the best.

"Learn from the humans, what is there to learn?" he replied boxing the last 3 cakes.

"Even after all that has happened, you still are blinded by your greed." Thor replied and shook his head, Loki frowned at him ripping his mitts off and throwing them on the counter.

"Good bye, Thor." He replied and turned going in the back away from Thor.

"Brother, will you not listen to me?" he called out as he watched him go.

"No!" he replied the door to the kitchen slamming behind him.

Thor sighed in defeat, he'd come back tomorrow maybe by then Loki will have learned his lesson, maybe then he could come home.

X

Loki sighed as he took his apron off and hung it on the coat wrack right inside the door of his shitty little apartment.

He really did hate it here, but apparently it's the best place to live on his salary.

Loki collapsed face first on his bed and wished upon anything that he could go back in time and become someone else.

X

The next few weeks Loki hadn't seen anything of Thor since that last time, as much as he hated to admit it he was somewhat worried for the moron.

It wasn't like Thor to stay away for so long, especially since Loki hadn't done anything so horrible for him to stay away.

Loki had just finished cleaning the espresso machine when he looked out towards the window as a group of people marched towards the building.

He furrowed his brows as they approached but grinned triumphantly when none other than the Avengers entered his shop and approached the desk.

Matt came out just then from the kitchen and looked up at the group.

"You've got to be kidding me, no way!" he screamed in excitement taking out his camera phone and shooting a hundred photos, Loki scowled, he had never once wanted even one photo of him.

Loki snatched the cell phone from him and threw it on the floor.

Matt just stared at him shocked.

"Whatever you want the answer is no, go be gone I am done with you!" Loki declared flailing his hands as he turned to hide from them in the kitchen. "Whatever it is, I didn't do it!" he added last minute.

"Hey Rudolph relax, we just came to talk." Tony replied equally loud after he had finished posing for the camera.

Loki turned and scowled over his shoulder at him.

"Where is your armor this time, Stark?" Loki replied tauntingly. Tony just smiled back at him cockily like always.

"Why planning on throwing me out of a window?" he quipped back, Loki smirked.

"Not this time, something much worse I'm sure." He replied.

"Now, now guys, relax." Banner interrupted as Loki and Tony engaged in a staring contest.

Loki took a step back when he realized the Hulk was among them, he still to this day had back problems.

"Banner." Loki greeted eyes dropping to the floor, Tony pursed his lips and nodded at the power Banner had over him.

"Nice." He quipped, Thor pushing out from the crowed to approach his brother.

"Brother, we come with a bargain." Thor interrupted as he stood a foot from his little brother looking down at him, Loki hated feeling so small.

"I am of no use to you, I don't know where it is whatever it is you want." Loki replied and crossed his arms over his chest taking a step back.

"Listen to me Loki." Thor replied and set a hand on his shoulder. Loki scowled at it but didn't push it off. "The world is in grave danger, you know the universe well. You can help us." He added, Loki scoffed.

"Why do I care if the world is in peril? That is exactly what I tried to do, if this other force can bring the humans to kneel then so be it." He replied and waved a hand shrugging Thor's hand off.

Thor frowned and gripped him by the shoulders.

"You forget you are also human, if the humans are brought to their knees you will have to kneel too."

Loki scowled and stared at the ground he hated it when Thor was right.

"Fine, what is your bargain?" he replied and shrugged Thor's hands off again, Thor gave him some space.

"We search for the home of our enemy, if we can stop him before he gets here then no one should have to die." He replied, Loki rose his chin proudly as he listened to his brothers bid.

"I want my scepter, I want my magic back and I want my cloths, this is the bargain." He replied and crossed his arms over his chest.

Thor turned to the other Avengers as he thought over the offer.

"No way I'm letting him have his magic back." Natasha interrupted and shook her head.

"Yeah and that glow stick of his he'd be gone in a heart beat." Tony added.

"I agree." Captain America piped up from behind.

Thor shrugged. Loki scowled.

"No magic, no scepter, no deal." Loki replied and turned to leave.

"So you're saying you would rather stay here and bake cookies then come with us and try to stop the world from getting obliterate, just because you cant have your toys?" Tony replied Loki hesitated a thought over what he had said.

"Well yes." He replied matter-of-factly. Thor sighed heavily.

"Brother please, if you help us father has agreed if the force is defeated then you will be accepted back to Asgard, given back your powers and your seat at my right hand, please brother take this opportunity." Thor interrupted, Loki stared up at his brother for a moment and considered his options.

"I want my cloths, I want my armor." He replied and crossed his arms, Thor smiled triumphantly and couldn't help but pull his brother into a bear hug, Loki growled angrily as he was manhandled by the brute and laughed at by the others.

Loki mustered enough strength to push him off.

"Get off me, you giant idiot." He grumbled and turned to leave the shop, one hand placed on his lower back as he walked out with some difficulty, Thor hadn't helped his condition in the slightest thank you very much.

The ride to the boat wasn't much different from the last time, Loki sat in the back of the plane hands folded in his lap, the Avengers all at least 5 feet away from him in every direction.

Hawkeye flying the jet glared back at him in the rear view mirror, he didn't like this, at all.

Thor approached his brother and sat next to him.

"Your belongings are at Avengers headquarters, you may have them as soon as we land." Loki didn't reply just sat there brooding. "I promise brother, you shall not regret your decision."

Loki glanced to the other Avengers all glaring at him or whispering amongst themselves how much they didn't like him. Loki frowned and stared at the ground.

"I already do."

A/N: Yay another Loki fic! May turn into Loki/Tony so far though just Loki centric and trying to get him into the group. Really feeling a little Loki/Tony magic though, ;)

Let me know if you like this, any ideas on villains? I have no idea who this 'great force' is who was the guy in the Avengers credit scene? He seemed badass, if you know please tell me, I'll put it in there! Yay.

Hope u like, please review!