The Desian Ranch was a magical place willed with pretty flowers, pants, and all the calamari anyone could ever eat. Except no one eats it. Because it tastes bad. But the Desians are bad people so it matches. Chocolat was a slave forced to build fat-sized underwear for people in Tethe'allarant out of tortilla shells.
"Shit I want a taco," Chocolat said.
She put down the pancakes she was now holding for unknown reasons on the floor. Pancakes belong on the floor. Then Lloyd kicked down a door with his ass and jumped into the room.
"Your name sounds like chocolate!1!" he screeched.
Lloyd turned into a vampire and jumped and munched on her head. Then the fish guy from Spongebob exploded out of the ground and screamed, "!" He proceeded to then disintegrate into fish sticks.
Raine crawled over on the ground crab-style and ate all the fish sticks.
"Yummy in my tummy!" she smeekled.
But then! Dun dun DUUUUUUUNNNNNN! The Desians arrived! Or at least four of them. The rest were all clones of each other because all the enemies look exactly the same. So they're clones. Except no one knew that. It was a Desian secret.
"Thop interrupting our danth partay~" they all whined in unison.
The dance party was forever ruined.
"Are there cows here on the Desian ranch?" Colette asked.
"Yes. Me." Presea answered. She was now a cow. With pink hair. In fact, she was a pink cow! No, that sounds ridiculous. She was just a regular cow with pink hair. Also her axe had turned into a cowbell. In an axe pattern.
"NEEDS MORE COWBELL!" Regal yelled.
Sheena took the cowbell axe thing and smashed it out the ground. A treasure chest made out of cats popped out of the cowbell.
"That's my baby!" Zelos said happily.
"Fuck you, that's my apple!" Genis said mad.
The treasure chest turned into an apple, which Lloyd popped out from.
"Neeeeerrrrrrpppp" Botta said. Freeform jazz started to play loudly. Then everyone ate Noishe.