Turkey's Wizarding Woes

Summary: A new problem has arisen during the world conference and it comes in the form of the wizarding world. Or to put it more simply, the nations spend the world meeting weekend playing Pottermore.

Warning: Unbeta'd

As Turkey sat swivelling in his chair at the meeting table he couldn't help feeling as if he was missing something. He was terribly bored - as most world meetings go (especially the weekend long ones) - so that wasn't anything new, but he could hardly get anyone else's attention long enough without them zoning out from him as they all listened to Estonia giving his speech.

And by all he really meant just Germany.

Everyone else was too busy glancing at their laptop screens and the phones they weren't doing a good job of hiding in their laps all while maintaining a look of utter concentration directed towards Estonia even though he could bet all the ashure in the world that none of them knew what the hell the guy was talking about. Even Estonia himself was getting distracted every few sentences or so as he glanced down at his own laptop in front of him.

Something was clearly going on (Germany's stormy face was proof enough to back that conclusion up) and Turkey did not like to be left in the dark.

He minimised the documents open on his laptop and opened up his browser, searching for any news or events happening at the moment that was big enough to distract everyone.

There was nothing of too much importance going on anywhere. Even his email alerts were sparse on information. What the hell was going on!

He was in the middle deciding whether it would be too undignified for a nation to simply type up a yahoo question for the answer when the chat box in the corner flashed up.

Surprisingly it was Greece, although the other nation made it a point to either ignore him or argue with him half the time.

G: Do you have a Pottermore account?

T: Is that open for everyone now?

G: Has been for a while now. Late to the party as usual?

Yes! He'd been waiting for this moment ever since he'd heard of the sites creation. Now he could finally take his rightful place in Slytherin and show that brat he was meant to be feared.

T: I'll be there in five. Friend me first!

Turkey had managed to get through the first few chapters and buy all the equipment he needed in Diagon Alley until he was through to the sorting hat ceremony, answering each question as truthfully as possible. Finally the hat was ready to decide.

'The Sorting Hat has placed you in Hufflepuff.'


He'd gone through half the chapters while practising a few spells and failing to make a cure for boils for the twelfth time when Greece messaged him again.

G: What's your username?

T: DraconisCloak47297

A few seconds later a notification popped up at the top of the webpage signalling a friend request from the user BronzeHowl2590. Greece no doubt. He was tempted to click ignore but then that would mean he'd miss out on the chance to annoy the Grecian and blast his ass with a curse or two so he clicked accept. It was then that he noticed Greece's icon colour and froze.


How the hell did that damn brat get into Slytherin?

That was precisely what he was about to angry type before another notification popped up. He opened the message to find a wizard duelling request from the said Slytherin across the table who was looking over at him with an unvoiced challenge gleaming in his eyes.

Wizard duelling against Greece? Bring it on! He would win against that brat any day of the week.

***Half an hour later***

GAHHH! He'd lost his 42nd game in a row to Greece. How? How?

Pulling the chat window back up, he punched in:

T: Stop cheating

G: I'm not cheating, you just suck.

T: I don't suck, you suck! You're cheating, I know you are.

G: Oh no, did I huffle your puff? Terribly sorry.

T: Hufflepuff is way better than Slytherin any day.

G: I can tell you wanted to be in Slytherin.

T: I did not

G: Yes you did.

T: Nu-uh

G: Lies.

T:I will crush you!

"Er, guys?"

Both Greece and Turkey glanced up from their screens not expecting each nation to be glaring at them like they'd given away their most silenced secret. It was then that Turkey noticed he may have been typing a little too furiously while arguing with Greece, and no one could ignore the herd of cats that had managed to envelop Greece in his entirety into what could only be described as a real life cat suit in an attempt to get their owners attention away from the screen and on to them. Turkey could just make out his face amongst the fur.

"Yes?" They both asked innocently.

"Could you please pay attention?" Germany rebuked. "I've already had to confiscate laptops from America and England this morning; I don't want to have to do it to more people."

"If England hadn't been such a sore loser and started using real magic then they wouldn't have to be confiscated." America sulked, tearing a chunk out of a hamburger. There was a split second where he contemplated throwing it at England's eyebrows but he wasn't going to waste good food on those.

"I was playing fair!"

"So my tongue just decided to tie itself after you performed the tongue-tying spell, did it?"

"By the way you talk it's entirely believable."


"You got off lightly America, just be lucky you weren't in the magic standoff between England and Scotland I spent most of last night trying to defuse." Wales cut in, bags under his red eyes looking like he was going to fall off his chair any second if it weren't for Ireland nudging him every few minutes.

America opened his mouth to start fighting with England but snapped it shut as Germany slammed a fist on the table.

"Quiet! You've all been warned, anymore of this Pottermore and it will be banned for the whole weekend conference."

Everyone looked between one another silently, each trying to avoid Germany's pointed glare. With a collective sigh they all started to close their laptops and bring their phones up from their laps to put back in their pockets, each turning their attention to Germany and the meeting.

"Thank you. As we were discussing-"


Prussia burst through the double doors of the conference room with a deafening bang. Bringing his fingers to rub at his temples, Germany groaned as figures of how much it was going to cost to fill the dent in the wall entered his mind.

"West, I finally beat you at duelling! I also managed to get more house points than you. Do you know what that means? I'm in the lead of all of you, kesese. I am awesome!"

"You beat Germany?" Italy asked, his eyes opening in awe while everyone murmured impressively amongst themselves.

Germany was torn. They had a meeting to get through, but at the same time there was no way he could let his big bruder get more scores than him. Meeting be damned!

Gritting his teeth, Germany turned back towards the other nations and barked, "Meeting postponed! Be ready to continue in two hours."

As he sat back in his chair and powered up his laptop everyone in the room followed suit. Except for Prussia, who was too busy fist pumping the air.

So this was just a bit of fun I wrote a couple of weeks ago to see what it would be like with nations playing Pottermore :P (with no offense meant towards Hufflepuff fans - it's a great house and with Turkey there it's even better ;))

DraconisCloak and BronzeHowl are names used in Pottermore but I used random numbers at the end.

I wanted to give Greece and Turkey usernames for their chat but couldn't think of anything and the only things I could think of for Turkey all ended up being turkish delight related so I gave up and just used G and T :(