I Do Not Own Superman, Wonder Woman, or any related characters.


Lois Kent, formerly Lane, picked up the mail for her and Clark's apartment happily. Noticing a package addressed to her husband, from Novelty Items Inc., she decided to open it. After all, it was probably more fake glasses, which Clark kept losing or breaking.

But when she opened it, the reporters blue eyes narrowed.

Walking over to her own Justice League communicator, provided simply because she was Superman's spouse, she promptly called the Watchtower.

"This is the Watchtower," the voice of J'onn Jonzz, answered. "Do you need to speak with Superman Lois?" the martian asked politely.

"No, but if you could, please tell Diana I'd like her to visit as soon as possible, preferably before Clark arrives home," the woman responded.

"I shall pass along your message," the Martian informed her.

"Thanks J'onn."


Wonder Woman, Princess Diana of Themyscira, looked down at the box with anger. "This was addressed to Clark?" she asked angrily.

Lois nodded.

Diana's fist clenched in anger. "I am going to kill him," she hissed.

"Get in line," Lois informed her. "He's my husband."


Clark returned to his apartment with a smile on his face. "Lois, I'm home!"

"We know," his wife responded coolly, causing him to turn and look at her and Diana, glaring at him from the kitchen.

"This is a surprise," Clark said, a little confused by the glares his wife and friend were sending him. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit Diana."

"This you pervert!" Diana yelled, whipping a box at his head, which he caught just before it hit his head. "Lois called me when she found it, it was addressed to you!"

Wondering what he was being accused of, Clark looked down, only to be shocked to find a box for an inflatable Wonder Woman sex doll in his hands. Looking up frantically at the thoroughly angry women he said, "This isn't mine, I swear. I never ordered anything like this!"

"Yeah, well if it isn't yours, whose is it?" his wife demanded with a glare.


In Ann Arbor, Michigan, twenty year old University of Michigan student Clark Kent, a blond haired, green eyed man, eagerly opened up the package from the Novelty Items Inc., expecting to find the blow up sex doll of Wonder Woman he ordered.

Instead he found a bunch of fake glasses.

"What the hell," he exclaimed. "Where's my Wonder Woman doll?"


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