Title: Locked In
Pairing: Puckleberry with a dash of Santana. Pezberry/Pucktana Friendship.
Rating: T (Might go up.)
"Why the hell won't this thing open?"
Puck grunted as he slammed his shoulder up against the choir room door, trying to dislodge it out of place. They'd been stuck in there for the better part of twenty minutes and it was starting to look like they weren't getting out at all. He debated just giving up but after glancing at the two girls with him he swiftly changed his mind. Rachel was rocking back and forth in her chair as her eyes frantically looked between him and Santana, who looked like she was two seconds away from shoving her nail file into the other girl's eye. He didn't know what possessed Mr Shue to put the three of them together, they didn't see eye to eye on a day to day basis they weren't going to agree on song choices. Now thanks to their teacher they were potentially stuck in a room together until morning, if someone didn't kill someone before that of course.
"Oh, god. Oh, god. Oh, god." Rachel mumbled as her hands clutched at her hair in desperation when she realised she was stuck in a room with two of her worst nightmares.
Santana rolled her eyes at the mumbles coming from beside her and snapped, "Shut up, Manhands! You're wasting all of our oxygen."
Puck huffed out a breath as he paused in his attempt to break down the door and shot the cheerleader a glare, "You really think that's helping right now, Satan?"
"Shut up, Puckerman."
He smirked back at her, "Make me, bitch."
Further insults were halted when the petite brunette with them started to whimper, terrified that they would realise she was the easiest target in the room and turn on her instead of each other. She began hyperventilating realising that they were not getting out of this room tonight, the janitor would be long gone by now. She calmed slightly realising she could just call her Father's to come get her when she remembered Mr Shue had put their phones in his office claiming that they would be returned when they were successful in their projects and worked well together as a team. Hopeful she glanced over at the office door only to realise that it was tightly shut and she'd wager it was locked as well. This was so irresponsible of the school; they shouldn't have been left unsupervised after school hours at all never mind get locked in a room all night. She briefly wondered why the janitor didn't hear them when he locked up before remembering that they had all been silently listening to their iPods instead of discussing song choices with each other. She had tried of course before both of them had quickly shut her down. Her gasping breaths renewed with fresh vigour and she could blearily see Puck's wide eyed expression as he watched her before she was wrapped up in someone's arms, their hand rubbing comfortingly down her back.
Santana patted her softly on the hand as she tried to calm her down, "Ugh, this is disgusting. I hope you appreciate this. Look just calm down alright, someone will let us out any minute. Relax, Rachel."
"You called me Rachel." She dumbly replied unaware if the pretty cheerleader had ever called her by her first name the entire time she'd known her.
Santana shrugged and pulled the other girl closer into her side when she realised she was calming down, "That's your name isn't it?"
Puck raised a brow at how close the two girls were and gave up on the door instead choosing to lean against it as he watched them, "You know if you two wanna cuddle more, maybe kiss a little I'm sure that would keep us all pretty relaxed."
Santana snorted in amusement and shook her head, "You know I do my best work without an audience."
Rachel pulled away from Santana a little to explain not realising they were joking, "While I find Santana to be a highly attractive girl –" She paused a little flustered when Puck let out a vaguely sexual sounding groan before carrying on, "I don't particularly find myself turned on by my own gender."
"Why do you have ruin it?" Puck moaned giving up all pretence of shoving the door open to take a seat infront of them.
"I'm sure I could change your mind about that, sexy."
Rachel frowned at the other girl, pulling away to cross her arms defensively across her chest, "You were calling me Manhands not ten minutes ago, Santana."
The other girl hummed and gestured to Puck as she stated, "Just a little foreplay. Just like Puck's slushies were."
"Yeah, I could totally see through those ugly ass sweaters of yours, babe." Puck told her whilst leering at her chest to further make his point.
Rachel gasped and crossed her arms tighter across her chest unaware that all she was doing was shoving her cleavage together, "That's repulsive!"
Puck shrugged confused about why she was offended, "Why? I can't help the fact that you're hot."
Rachel's face slackened and a light blush formed across her cheeks, "You think I'm hot?"
"Pretty sure I let your tight little ass sit on my lap more than once."
"I thought that you just wished to engage in intercourse with the first available female around."
"Intercourse? See that is exactly why people don't find you hot, that talking thing you do with your mouth." Santana rolled her eyes disbelieving that this was the girl Puck had refused her advances for during the short time the two had dated.
Rachel scowled as she ran her fingers across her bottom lip, "What's wrong with my mouth?"
"Nothing, baby. Not one thing." Puck graced her with a soft smile which she hesitantly returned as she gazed up at him through her lashes.
Santana groaned in disgust at the googly eyes the two were giving each other, "God, why don't you just ram your dick down her throat already, Puckerman. You're starting to look pathetic."
"Rude, I don't want her to gag on it like you used to." He smiled bitterly at the other girl more than a little annoyed that she was in the room with them.
Rachel seemingly oblivious to the sexual conations of her comment blurted out happily, "Oh! I don't have a gag reflex."
Puck nodded smugly before doing a double take at the brunette, "W-what? Wait, what?"
"I think you broke him." Santana noted chuckling at the mohawked boys shocked face.
Rachel glanced worryingly at him and went to touch his arm before thinking better of it, "I didn't mean to."
"Quick, kiss me. It should help."
"How exactly would that help? I don't understand why you suddenly want to kiss me." Rachel asked suddenly exasperated with the other girl's bi-polar attitude towards her.
"He made you sound good, like better than me which is almost highly impossible. He says you do this thing where you like suck his lip and then nibble it just –"
Rachel interrupted her explanation and turned scandalised eyes to Puck who had recovered from his state of shock, "You told her in detail how I've kissed you?"
He nodded unconcerned at her anger, it wasn't like he did anything wrong, "We're bro's and you're really good at it. Top marks for a prude."
"I'm not a prude!" She resented the implication that she was and raised her brows mockingly at him as she suggested, "Maybe you're just not as seductive as you think you are."
"Oh, burn. I can dig on bitchy Berry."
Puck scowled at the two of them and grew defensive that his manhood was being questioned, "Shut up, Satan. You're kidding right? I'm like the kissing master; I'm a total sex shark! All I have to do is look at a chick and her ovaries would explode."
"Is that supposed to be sexy?"
Santana had to agree with the smurf that was the least sexy thing she'd possibly ever heard and she'd witnessed Jacob Israel try to pick up Rachel on a daily basis, "Dude, you have zero game right now."
"Shut up! Both of you have truly enjoyed a ride on the Puckerone."
Rachel glanced at Santana in confusion and asked, "Is that a nickname for his penis because if so I have most certainly have not enjoyed a ride on it."
"I have, he's pretty good actually. Not better than me though, I'm very, very good." She admitted reluctantly and threw in a little flirting for good measure, she liked seeing Puck about to lose his cool and Rachel actually looked pretty cute when she flushed all embarrassed.
Rachel was starting to lose herself in the conversation and continuously felt like it was taking a sexual turn and so asked frankly, "Are you trying to convince me to engage in a threesome with you both?"
Santana wasn't trying to insinuate that at all and from the blank and awed look on Puck's face neither was he but that didn't mean she couldn't have a little fun with this. Also if it did happen to turn into a threesome she was all for it, Puck was really good at sex and she figured if Rachel could make him lose his shit just by kissing him then the girl had to have some natural talent in bed. Also she dressed like a pervert's wet dream so she had to be at least a little kinky.
Puck closed his eyes and for the first time this year he started to pray as he mumbled, "Please say yes, please say yes, please, please…"
"You know we can hear you over there right?"
"Um, no?" He stopped mumbling and rubbed the back of his neck embarrassed at being caught before deciding just to roll with it, "Still applies though."
Rachel as always decided to approach the awkward situation she had gotten herself into with a logical approach, "While the idea of appearing in a ménage et tois appeals to my repertoire as a young budding ingénue. I most definitely would not be doing so with two out of the three people at this school who have constantly went out of their way to make my life hell and hate me."
Puck frowned and pointed an accusing finger her way, "Hey! I apologised for that shit and you said you forgave me."
"Nevertheless, Noah, you've hardly went out of your way since our week long tryst to forge any kind of companionship with me."
Santana's brows scrunched disturbed at herself for finding the walking dictionary mildly hot as she reprimanded Puck, "It didn't used to be hot, right? Her talking like that?"
Puck remained dismayed at the shorter girl's revelation and ignored Santana's question, "How could you think we're not friends?"
Rachel shrugged and pointed out, "When I broke up with you and offered friendship, you threw it back in my face and stated in no certain terms that we were never friends before."
"Well you bruised my ego; you were dumping my fine ass! I didn't mean it."
Santana threw up a hand to stop the conversation and spluttered out a laugh as she looked between the two of them, "Whoa, whoa, wait. She dumped you? This is priceless."
"You're really not helping me here; wanna sit your ass there quietly?" Puck snapped at her, utterly annoyed at her laughing face.
"Honestly, I don't see why you're so upset, Noah."
He groaned in response and tipped his head up to look at the ceiling, "Why couldn't you have locked us in here naked?
"Why so you could humiliate yourself some more?"