As we all know, the Rangers survive on coffee. So what happens when someone steals all Halt's coffee?

Will knocked on the door to the cabin. "Halt? Halt, you in there?"

There was no answer, but Will's keen ears picked up on a pained moan. He threw open the door.

Will gasped. There, in the midst of trash and debris, sat his teacher, curled up in a ball and rocking in a corner. His eyes were bloodshot and his hair hadn't been hacked in awhile.

He rushed to his master. "Halt! What happened?" With great difficulty, Halt brought his shaky gaze up to his apprentice's.

"C-coffee... s-stolen..."

Will gasped. This was worse than treason!

He quickly dashed around the little cabin, preparing water and making coffee using an emergencies only stash of his own. Soon the coffee was ready to drink, and after drizzling honey into it, he brought it to the grizzled ranger's lips. Halt drank deeply, not caring about the scalding sensation in his throat, and after he was finished let the mug drop to his side. He let out a long, content sigh. He looked ready to fall asleep. But before that, there was one more thing Will needed to know.

"Halt. Who... who did this to you? Who deprived you of your coffee?"

The ranger looked deep into Will's eyes, and before he slumped into unconciousness, uttered a single word:


Gilan sipped the coffee happily. It had taken weeks to get his hands on it, and was, by far, the best he had ever gotten. And it was all his!

Suddenly, the door burst open! "You traitor!" Will yelled furiously. Gilan could almost see flames surrounding him. "How could you? Halt trusted you! And you let him down!"

"W-who, me?" Gilan stammered. "I didn't do anything!" Will pointed to the coffee mug still in Gilan's hand.

"Then what is that?"

Gilan looked at the younger ranger, then hurled the coffee mug towards the window. It hit the glass, and fell to the floor. The hot, brown coffee was all over the curtains.

"Aww, why'd I do that?" Gilan moaned, dropping to his knees. "Those stains are going to be impossible to get out!" He came to his senses and realized Will was by the curtains. Will stuck a finger on the coffee drenched fabric, and tasted it. He glared at Gilan.

Gilan gulped. This was bad.

"So, you brought all my coffee back?" Halt said cheerfully. Will had Gilan tied to Tug so he wouldn't run away, while Will himself sat atop the saddle.

"Not a bean left in his cabin," he answered. Halt let out a good natured laugh, and turned to his first apprentice.

"I didn't do anything, Halt!" Gilan pleaded. "Please, have merc-"

"No coffee for the next ten years!" Halt said gleefully.

Will doubled over laughing as Gilan screamed in agony and distress.

Back at Redmont, Alyss stopped sipping her coffee at a strange, faint scream. "Do you hear that, my lady?" she asked.

Lady Pauline stopped to listen. Holding in an unlady-like grin, she answered: "Yes, I do."

"What do you think it could possibly be?"

Pauline thought for a moment. "Perhaps Halt finally found out we stole his coffee."

"It sure did take them a while," Alyss commented.

"It sure did," Lady Pauline finally smiled, and poured herself another cup of coffee.


I was bored of writing seriously. My attempt at humor.

image belongs to whoever posted it on RA wiki.

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