A/N: Yes, a Homestuck/Hetalia crossover. Shoot me.


Homestuck belongs to Andrew Hussie and Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya.

A lone figure wanders an aquatic wasteland.

Water, water, water, as far the eye can see.

Frankly, it is disgusting.

It wasn't always like this.

Not until the fateful day of 11/11/11.

When Her Imperious Condescension took the reins of planet Earth.

The nations did not react well.

They prepared the armies for the coming invasion.

Or so they thought.

In the end, since the Condesce already had her people in the right places, the control of the armies were transferred to her.

Then, after that, the bright sunshine that humanity once basked in was covered by a perpetual eclipse of bloodshed and subjugation.

It truly began to end with America's descent into madness.

The happy-go-luck, overflowing with vitality hero-wanabee was no more. In his place was a vulgar, psychopathic juggalo that constantly spouted Faygo and bad freestyle rap lyrics. It may sound funny to a separate, third person party that is reading this on a website for fanfiction, but in reality, it wasn't pretty at all.

The only person that felt this change more keenly than America was England.

It truly hurt him to see the boy he raised turn into this… monstrosity.

Unfortunately, it was reality in the life of a nation.

America would obviously never do any of this of his own free will, but naturally, as part of what bound nations to the land they represented, they were forced to agree with their bosses, no matter what horrible and inhumane decisions they made.

America's two bosses, Presidents Jay and Dope (both of them were presidents) were a pair of insane juggalo freestyle rappers that spouted vulgarity, Faygo and bad freestyle rap lyrics. As High Chaplain Guy Fieri held up the Bible to swear them in, the three began to publicly defecate on it while laughing. The national pastime was changed to getting Type 2 diabetes, as Faygo was pumped through the water system instead of faygo. The national anthem was changed to a three-minute high reverb audio clip of President Jay farting into a microphone while laughing. Ergo, America degraded to… this.

Then, Fieri set up death camps for people who were not deemed "mirthful" enough.

America then proceeded to wipe out the world's population by the billions.

Not before England magically cursed him with all his might. Nobody thought it would work, but it did.

They just didn't live to see it.

There was a resistance movement, but it failed. However, a certain Dave Strider and a certain Rose Lalonde saw to it that the war criminals were brought to justice. Dave sliced Presidents Jay and Dope in half, and Rose gouged out the High Chaplain's eyes with a pair of needles and rode his torso to the bottom of the bloody falls.

After that, America regained his senses.

England's curse turned out to be that after America's bosses were deposed, he would be unbound from his land, turning him into Alfred F. Jones instead of America.

Alfred had enough humanity left in him to take his own life after seeing what he had done.

He killed himself just at the right time, right before Her Imperious Condescension herself took power.

At least she knew how to rule.

After the transfer of power, humanity would be tampered with until its eventual extinction. The Condesce would attempt to change humanity into a mirror of her old society in all of its sick, twisted glory.

She would attempt to change blood color, change the natural relation between parent and child, and commit a whole bunch of atrocities that piled up until the entire human population unceremoniously died out.

The figure disappears.

A/N: It sucks, non? Oh well. I'll leave it up to the reader to figure out who the figure is.