...And here is Chapter 10. Thank you Blackrose414! XD Again, you're the best.
Chapter 11 coming very soon. I demand you to be excited.
=.= Chapter 10
Once they returned to Shizuo's place, Izaya was the first to kick off his shoes and lay back on the couch. He was mentally exhausted all over again. He had felt relieved at first with no commands all day but at the same time he felt unnerved. He spent his whole day on guard carefully hidden behind his mask, waiting to hear some totally outrageous request.
Shizuo hadn't spoken to him at all the rest of the day. He didn't even spare him a glance. The informant turned to his side, burying his face in the cushions of the couch to block out the light. What would cause Shizuo, monster of the streets, to become pissed and do nothing but glare in his direction. This was definitely out of character.
Shizuo had been doing so many things for Izaya lately that the latter feared the worst. It was true wasn't it? That Shizuo had a crush on Izaya. The informant didn't know what to do. Sure he had so many people before like him, fall for him, try to seduce him (all to their own demise) but they had all fallen for Izaya's facades under careful manipulation. No one would ever fall for the real Izaya.
Then something knew dawned on the informant. He couldn't think of one thing that anyone should like his true personality for. He was an asshole and even he knew it. Carefully hidden behind his mask of superiority and void of genuine emotion... until now. Was it the fact that Shizuo did know everything about him that caused him to feel?
Shizuo finally returned from the shower and saw the informant with his head shoved into the couch laying so still. He figured he must be asleep until he heard a sigh of frustration. The blonde was still angry about being used for more silly games but he couldn't help the urge to comfort the flea. Though, he quickly brushed that thought aside in favor of keeping his punishment up.
Shizuo sat on the arm of the couch shirtless, wearing pajama pants and a towel draped around his neck. His pent up frustrations caused him to twitch lightly at the sight of the informant's shirt raised just enough to get a peek at his abdomen. He wondered if the flea was aroused by his own appearance at all. Would he ever feel for Shizuo's mind and body the way he felt for Izaya's? He could never ask.
He reached a hand out to Izaya's foot and traced a line up the middle and on up to the ankle. The foot wriggled and pulled away causing Izaya to tear his face away from the couch cushions and face Shizuo. His expression was startled, Shizuo couldn't tell if it was because of the way he touched the man's foot or if it was at his current shirtless appearance. Probably both.
"What is it?" Izaya asked impatiently.
Shizuo just watched him for a moment with out responding. Izaya waited for a few moments before returning his face to the safety between the cushions. The blonde took this as a big red flag and moved to the spot where the raven's legs bent giving him a free spot to sit on the couch.
"Something wrong?" He stared at the floor as he spoke, hands clasped.
"You know, contrary to what you may think, I have problems too." His voice was a bit muffled but the other could understand him clearly.
Shizuo frowned. Of course he did, why would he ever think otherwise. He had been through SOOOO much over these last few days that a thought like that never even crossed his mind. If anything, he had been worried because the informant was carrying so much weight. He was forced into slavery by (even though it was his own fault) his most hated enemy on top of all kinds of consequences to each thing he really wanted to do. For instance: Run the fuck away from Shizuo so that he didn't have to deal with any of it.
Shizuo reached out a hand and rubbed it affectionately on the back exposed to him.
"I know, but hey listen, you have to tell me the truth."
Izaya felt his cheeks heat up in a familiar way but it really wasn't near as intense as his previous experiences. In fact, it was so faint that he could shrug it off. Though knowing what the command was really didn't make him want to relax. The thought crossed his mind to cover his eyes with the blindfold but his face was already buried in the couch as he heard Shizuo continued.
"Izaya, what do you think of me?"
The informant let out a self depreciating chuckle. "Of course you would ask that at this time."
Shizuo felt a pang of guilt at the comment.
"You want to know what I think of you. Okay..." Not that he had much choice. "I think you are a monster, a neanderthal, violence incarnate..."
Shizuo lowered his head. What else could he expect?
"Oh, so that's how you really feel about me." His tone was low and filled with disappointment.
"'Feel' and 'think' are two different things, Shizu-chan."
"Okay, then how do you feel about me? Do you think of me at all?"
"Think of you at all... hahaha. Of course I do, in the strangest, most terrifying near death fantasies."
Then something else came over him.
"I feel like you might like me. I feel my chest tighten when you come around. I feel like I'm going out of my mind when you touch me and I don't feel disgusted like I should. Though, I can't think of one thing in the world you would ever like about me. Sure, I might be fun and obedient now but what about when the meds wear off? What about when I don't have to be near you?" His own facial expression was confused and his eyes were wet from unreleased tears. Why would he give away that sacred information?
"I know, but hey listen, you HAVE to tell me the truth." He remembered the blonde's words and turned toward the seat of the couch. "That's cheating, Shizu-chan."
How could Izaya ever know if Shizuo was telling the truth in times like this. He's not forced to reveal his inner most thoughts that he would never tell a soul. Izaya felt exposed, completely open to his arch nemesis. He couldn't possibly learn to trust someone, especially this guy.
Shizuo wasn't ready to hear that. He was sure that the first answer given was the right one because he expected that type of answer, but that was wrong? He felt relieved to hear all these things that the other man had been feeling, very similar to his own, but he also felt hurt by the informant's questions. He felt angry but he was right. This was something that hadn't even crossed his mind. What will he do? Right now he is only looking out for his health but once that isn't an issue anymore will he run away just like before?
"You're right. I guess it isn't fair." Shizuo got up from his spot on the couch and walked into the his spare bathroom. Izaya lifted his head to watch, he was confused, tears streaming down his flustered cheeks. A loud sound was heard and he was seen heading towards his own bedroom with a large mirror and disappearing from his vision again. After some more loud noises, he revealed himself again and walked right up to Izaya.
"So I'll tell you the truth too." Shizuo placed his hands behind the informant's back and under his legs and supported him. He walked his way to the bedroom as he continued. "I can't stand not watching you. I think you're sexy when you're being fake, even though you really piss me off at the same time. And when you are the person you are right now, you're really cute. To me, this is the real you, though I know that a lot of what I've seen in the past is also you. For example, your insatiable urge to meddle and experiment with people's lives... Mine included."
Izaya just stared at the blonde's face as he allowed himself to be carried by him. A tear fell down his own cheek as he felt touched by the man's words, though something tugged at his chest. The last of the blonde man's words were proof to him that there was no reason for Shizuo to want anything to do with him that didn't involve the usual vending machine or two.
Izaya felt himself lowered on to the bed and the warmth of the taller man left him. Confused by his actions, Izaya began to fiddle with the sleeve of his jacket as he used his shoulders to adjust himself to the pillow. His eyes wandered the room for a moment, noticing that it had been slightly rearranged and the mirror was placed close to the bed. He saw his own reflection and cringed. He hated himself right now. He hated who he really was and he wanted nothing more than to disappear beneath the safety of his blindfold. It was temporary relief for himself from being exposed, being used as a toy, seeing himself be anything other than what he wanted to believe was himself. He grabbed the blindfold that hung around his neck and raised it over his eyes. Seeing is believing, right?
Shizuo sat on the corner of the bed facing away from the smaller man. He cupped his own face in his hands and he took in a deep breath before scooting over to where the informant's feet were hanging off the bed, as to not dirty it with his shoes.
"To be honest..." He spoke in a low tone, reaching slowly for Izaya's shoe and removing it with care as he continued. "I really hate using these commands." He grabbed the other shoe and did the same. Izaya instinctively raised his knees and set his feet on the bed, his white socks in such contrast to the black sheets and his blue skinny jeans.
Shizuo looked over his knees to see another tear fall from beneath the informant's blindfold, his face turned to the side.
'What is he getting at? Is he going to break me now? Because he knows the truth? How do I know he's not lying?' Izaya was frustrated beyond himself. He was touched by Shizuo's words but he didn't want to be. He didn't want to believe because no one could ever like anything about him. He was exposed, completely exposed in front of someone who is pretending to care.
"So, yeah... you like my body... I get it." Even though he spoke to the blonde, he never turned his face to the man. His voice was slightly strained.
Shizuo frowned again. In a smooth movement he leaned over Izaya's knees, placing himself fully on the bed and over the man. His face was only inches away from the other's. Izaya felt the movement and the breath on his face, he tensed when he realized how close the blonde was. But when the smaller man didn't move or protest, Shizuo ran a tongue over his cheek, slowly lapping up salty tears.
"Izaya, I do like your body..." Shizuo removed the blindfold and stared into crimson eyes as if willing him to believe the truth. "I also like that weird guy who runs from me in the street. I also like the guy who cuddled to me in my bed last night. I even still like the guy who gave me a fake kiss on the cheek today... I can't help it."
Shizuo then leaned his head down and placed a light kiss on the other man's lips, holding for a few moments. Izaya's own lips reflexively puckered back but Shizuo's left him. He looked into those blood red eyes one more time before speaking again.
"My chest hurts when I even think about you. It used to be out of anger but now I'm not so sure. I've never felt like this before and what you said earlier..." He smiled as he muttered the last few words. "...made me so happy."
Shizuo kissed Izaya's forehead while settling his legs more comfortably between the other's knees, leaving room for his hips to lower.
"So I guess you're right. I think I do like you."
Izaya felt a flood of emotions. He couldn't process anything. Shizuo's face came closer and he pressed his lips on the other's. Slowly, Shizuo caressed Izaya's cheek as he pressed his tongue between the slightly parted lips. Izaya let the man's tongue swirl with his own for a few minutes before he broke the kiss, still not fully believing in the man.
"What is it?" Shizuo's voice was full of concern.
Izaya's hand wandered to his mouth and he chewed on the sleeve of his jacket. His face looked calm until his 'truth command' took over and he flushed a bit before he spoke.
"It's just that there's nothing about me to like."
The blonde frowned yet again, hooking his arms under the form pulling them to sit up. Once they were sitting upright, Shizuo shifted himself behind the brunette and placed his legs on either side of him.
"Yeah, you already said that, I figured it would be hard to change your mind soo... This isn't the best way to do this but I promise there will only be one request. Watch the mirror."
Izaya was confused but he decided he would allow Shizuo a shot at whatever he was trying to do.
His eyes wandered over to the mirror after a few moments and he saw Shizuo's gaze meeting his from over his shoulder. He had a sinister grin accrossed his lips as he lowered them to the brunette's neck, his eyes never leaving the other's. The heat flashed over him in waves as he watched the scene before him. The man licked lightly over the sensitive skin of his neck and his face instantly changed from a confused scowl to a shock of pleasure. As embarrassed as he was about the faces he was making over something so simple, as much as he wanted to look away and hide himself, he couldn't. He could not tear his eyes away from the mirror.
"O-oi, Why are... you doing this?" Izaya was barely able to squeeze his words in between the hitched breaths as the tongue now retracted and he felt teeth grabbing the flesh instead.
"I don't get you. You are the most cocky guy I've ever met, I thought you believed all humans love you?"
"No, I believe all humans should love...ahn...me. There's... a difference, Shizu-chan. It doesn't mean I...hah... don't understand why they can't love me." He was still having trouble speaking between breaths and moans.
Shizuo bit down a few more times, speaking in between bites. "So you know why they don't love you? I just find it odd that someone who acts like you would have such low self confidence."
Shizuo released the man's flesh and ran his tongue up to his ear instead, lowering his tone to a whisper. "So, I'm showing you one of the things I like about you. Are you gonna run?" He paused for a moment waiting for a reaction but all that happened was the informant's eyes widened to huge crimson crystals.
Despite the fact that Izaya was asked a question, he didn't give an answer nor did he move to protest. Maybe he was curious but he hated looking into the mirror and seeing his own face, his own body act this way, respond in a way he didn't even know he could until recently.
...That is... until the command kicked in.
Shizuo smirked and slipped one of his hands under Izaya's shirt, letting his fingers roam the man's body for a few moments. Once he found one of the other's nipples, he pinched it lightly as he continued his attack on the man's neck.
Shizuo's other hand was placed on the opposite side of his neck, supporting it as he ravaged his flesh. A few moments passed before Shizuo lifted his head and whispered into the other's ear once more.
"You're not running." He chuckled a bit and then removed his hand from the man's neck and slipped an arm out of his jacket. He switched his hands positions and then freed his other arm.
"W-well... of course not. I HAVE to stare at the m-mirror!" Even though the informant was forced to, it was an excuse.
Shizuo stopped immediately. "Okay, fine, I'm trying to prove this to you... soo... You can stop watching the mirror but... if you don't look at it then I'll stop touching you."
"W-wha..?" Izaya was surprised that his eyes were able to leave the mirror but more surprised about Shizuo's words.
"Oh-hoh, Shizu-chan! You can be just as torturous as me, ne?" Smirk carefully placed on his face once more.
"Heh, No, I can be worse." Shizuo gave a look to the informant that he had NEVER seen before. It screamed: 'I'm going to get you back, Flea.' Izaya shivered as he watched the blonde get off the bed and disappear for a few moments.
Izaya couldn't help but think to himself. What if Shizuo did like him? What if he could prove there was something to like. Izaya was starting to like the idea of sex more and more even though it was something he had lost interest in after so long of conning people for it. It was boring. Why was it feeling so different now? And what was that look?
'I should probably go now, I'm not sure what that expression means... ugh but something about it makes me want to find out...'
Izaya had left his eyes closed ever since the blonde allowed him to stop watching the mirror. He decided that since he probably couldn't help but open his eyes he would need to place the blindfold over them. After he did so, he heard someone come back into the room, the door closing behind them.
The bed sunk down beside him as the blonde sat down. He gave a sly smile but the raven headed man was unable to see it. After a few moments Izaya could feels his shirt being tugged up over his head, he allowed it but only because he was curious, of course. Just what was this unpredictable man planning to do?
"Hey, Izaya... what's your favorite song?"
The question completely caught him off guard. "Huh?"
"Your favorite song." Shizuo answered still ridding the other of his clothes.
"Uhh, I don't really have one right now. Why?"
"Ugh, okay, then I'll just turn on the radio?"
"No, you should know there is never anything good on the radio."
Shizuo sighed. "True." So instead the blonde hooked up his iPod and played a random song. Kasuka had bought and set it up for him so he only knew some of the songs on it but they were all good as far as he could tell. A lot of them were vocaloid songs, though. When the song came on and it was soft, an acoustic song with a smooth male voice that filled the room. The deep voice made it sound like a sad song, though he didn't really pay attention to the lyrics.
Izaya had been distracted by the conversation, he didn't really realize that he had been stripped of his clothes until he heard some rustling in the room and the music. Thankfully, he could tell he was still in his briefs, but why was he practically naked? He opted not to freak out about this, otherwise he would just seem vulnerable again. Well, wasn't he vulnerable laying there almost naked anyways? He was making excuses to himself again.
The music was soothing to him in his exposed emotional state, which was definitely saying something. The informant was picky when it came to music but he didn't know this song, which was also saying something, he was an informant after all.
Shizuo was moving back to the bed now. Izaya felt the weight on the mattress again and he tensed. He was half naked, what could he want to do with him while he was half naked? Plus the blonde said he wouldn't touch him if he didn't look at the mirror... so what was going on?
"...Uhnn..." Izaya's voice escaped as he felt this strange sensation down his chest. It almost tickled but it was nothing to laugh at. He had never felt anything like it, it wasn't fleshy like the blonde's hand. It was soft but it barely touched him. He couldn't figure out what it was but the sensation sent pleasant shivers throughout his body. It moved up his chest once more and swept over his skin slowly, painfully slow. It made him want to take the blindfold off, he really wanted to know what it was, but he was way too stubborn for that.
Izaya shivered a bit more, unconsciously moving his arms out of the way and to his sides. The object moved up towards his neck and Izaya moved his head to the side reflexively to shield it. The object, however, took this opportunity to sweep up the opposite side and glide over his exposed flesh. Izaya trembled under the sensation even more letting out small breathy moans as the silky object slid over him.
Shizuo gave a low chuckle, he was basking in the informant's reactions.
"How does it feel?" He already knew the answer but the informant was required to answer all the blonde's questions. Even though he was 'only doing this to prove to Izaya there were indeed things to like about him,' he still couldn't help bullying him a bit.
Izaya's face was flushed heavily and strained, his hands were full of the sheets beneath him.
"...hah...hah...good...hah...hah." His own face looked shocked at his confession. "What are...hah..W-what are you doing?"
The blonde smiled as he ran the object back down his chest and swirled around his hip bones. Izaya squirmed a bit, his chest rising and falling heavily. "It's a secret. Of course, you could find out if you take that blindfold off."
Izaya gave his signature smirk. Nope, he wasn't falling for that. God, that man was just as manipulative as he was. Then it hit him. If Shizuo could truly be like this then he must have been taking it easy on Izaya the whole time. Again, the informant began to contemplate whether or not the man had genuine feelings for him but it was getting harder and harder for him to concentrate.
Shizuo halted his movements. Drowning in this amazing sight of his submissive rival in his bed, grasping the sheets, breathing shallow breaths, shaking lightly, blindfolded and exposed. He also couldn't miss that the man's briefs did nothing to hide the fact that he was fully erect. He couldn't tell if the informant was blushing because he was so wrapped up in the sensation or if it was because he was embarrassed about his erection, probably both. The part that he loved the most was that he had caused this little raven to look like a sexually frustrated mess all because of one little feather. The informant was free to go, but he was still here. Shizuo felt victorious and was starting to get more adventurous with his movements. Though, he still felt like he proved nothing other than the fact that he could make the man feel good.
The blonde continued his movements again, and he watched as the member beneath the man's briefs twitched lightly at each contact the feather made. The music filled the smaller man's ears and added to his sensation. He almost felt as if Shizuo was serenading him with the sweet sensations over his body and the slow calm music, it all made him shiver that much harder. He knew he was hard but what could he do about it? He was embarrassed but it didn't seem to bother the other man.
Shizuo moved the feather along the man's hip bones, skipping over his lap and continuing down his legs. They were smooth, twitching slightly. Izaya wasn't very manly underneath all his clothes. He wondered if Izaya had ever been touched by another guy before. He would be surprised if he hadn't with his looks.
Said informant was shocked out of his trance for a moment at the mention of his actual name. This wasn't the first time he was called that by the blonde, was it?
Shizuo moved down to the man's feet tickling them lightly for a moment before spending time on the ankles and calves.
"Are you a virgin?"
Izaya exhaled sharply as the feather touched the man lightly behind the knee. "...N-no..."
"Have you ever been touched by a guy before?"
Shizuo realized that Izaya wouldn't elaborate on his own and he really wasn't sure he wanted to hear the details.
Izaya could feel the disappointment in the movement of the object. He took a deep breath and his face darkened further, if possible.
"But it was you."
'Oh, the other time...'
Shizuo was happy, he knew the informant did NOT have to add that and he REALLY didn't think he would tell him that. Didn't he get touched by that guy at the park that day, though?
"What about that guy from the other day?"
"Huh? No... j-just you."
Shizuo felt relieved, it wasn't like he could lie right now, but he was sure that the man had touched him because his pants were undone.
'He must have already been past out.'
Shizuo pushed the thoughts aside, in favor of bullying the informant further.
"So you've had sex with women?"
Shizuo moved the feather up further, teasing the inside of the man's thigh.
"Ahh!...umm.. uh huhAH!..."
Shizuo giggled a bit, deciding he would need to tease the informant more while making him talk. He wasn't able to hide his moans as easy.
"Uh huh, did you have fun with them? Did you like fucking those girls?"
Shizuo was just making up questions now, just picking on the raven as he slid the feather dangerously low on the man's abdomen and around his belly button.
Well that certainly wasn't the answer he expected but it made his own member twitch furiously. Could it really be true that the informant was only like this with him?
"No? You didn't like the way any of those girls touched you?"
This time he just waited for a straight answer.
"No... I didn't." The informant was more calm but still trying to catch his breath
Shizuo stared at the man, this couldn't be right. Who doesn't enjoy sex?
"Do you like it when I touch you?" This time he slid the feather along the skin that wasn't covered by his arms on his sides and then down his inner arm.
"Ahhh! Y-YES! Ahh..."
Izaya could have died from embarrassment right there. He couldn't take it anymore, he ripped the blindfold from his eyes and immediately regretted it. The blonde was laying at his side grinning devilishly with his head resting on his hand. His free hand was holding a feather that was hovering over his neglected nipple but not yet touching it.
"Ahh, Izaya, are you ready to look at the mirror now?"
"I'd rather not look at myself."
"But you do want me to touch you, don't you?" Shizuo was feeling way too confident for his own good.
Izaya was about to get off the bed until his body protested.
"Yes, I do." His face flushed furiously.
'HA! One mission accomplished.'
"Izaya, do you want me to like you?"
Izaya looked away but spoke.
"Then why won't you let me?"
This time Izaya was even waiting to hear what came out of his own mouth. He wanted to know the answer to that too.
"I don't know, I guess because I don't really trust anyone."
"What do you want right now?"
"I'm too embarrassed to say it." Izaya just wanted to crawl under the bed and compose himself.
"Haha, Tell me what you want right now."
"Shizu-chan, please touch me." His voice was ragged and breaths deep and needy. His eyes were glazed over and the bell on the collar jingled lightly with each breath.
Shizuo giggled again, but on the inside he was glad because he was going crazy with lust for the man he had been teasing. So much that, he felt like he had been teasing himself the whole time.
"As you wish." Shizuo bowed his head before yanking the informant's briefs from his body. At the same time, as if on cue, the song changed to a darker much more upbeat song but they were too entranced to hear the words.