Ch. 5 – Hester at her needle
A/N: Listed Below. Enjoy the read!
My confinement was finally over! You would think that getting out of this gloomy and damp prison, one will feel happy or at ease at gaining ones freedom but I was actually nervous. As the prison door flew wide open, I stepped out into the sunshine with Pearl in my arms. Trying to adjust my eyes to the suns bright rays, I felt a little burning sensation on my chest. With the bright rays of sun, it appeared that it brighten the scarlet letter like if it was seeking attention. This made me very nervous.
This cursed letter shining very proudly won't help me at all. It will just make life harder…
Then reality hit me across my face.
How in the world am I going to support Pearl and I? Since this letter, stitched upon my person will give everyone a reason to let me be, to not help me or pearl just because of my sin.
I never thought or even planned what to do when I was set free. With every step I took forward, I trembled. I didn't know how to support Pearl and I. I had the choice to either move away or stay. Oh how much I wanted to go away but I no longer have that choice. If I did then the people in this town will win and I will not let that happen.
I will be damned if I left, giving these despicable people what they want. But I will show them that they cannot break me. I must stay strong for not only me but for Pearl also.
With my mind set, I went in search for a home. I wouldn't want to live in the town. They already despise me so I rather not push my luck. Walking on the path through the forest, I reached the outskirts of town when I noticed this cottage. It seemed like the cottage was yelling at me to come and I did. As I stepped inside, you could tell this small cottage was made in the early settlement and abandoned. There was dust cumulated everywhere showing that no one has been here for a very long time. Also, the material is very different than from the houses in town. The small cottage was also located by the shore. The oceans breeze smelled divine making this place very peaceful and the sight was just marvelous. Even though the cottage needed a lot of remodeling to do, I think this will be perfect to start life again with Pearl.
Once Pearl and I have settled in our new home, we have been having very strange visits. I noticed for a while that children would walk by. Sometimes they would be nosy and stick their head into my window looking at me work. Although they don't do anything bad, it's somewhat awkward and when they see me noticing them, they run away in fear.
The people in town should really take care of their children.
And call me irresponsible? How absurd!
My new life here in the outskirts of town, is rather lonely. I will admit that sometimes the quiet and loneliness is very hard to deal with but I won't give up. I won't be weak; not just to prove the towns' people wrong, but also I have to stay strong for Pearl. After struggling in the beginning with how to support Pearl and I, it turns out that I possess a very talented gift. My needle work is very popular here in town. There will always be frequent and characteristic demands for my work. I would prepare clothes for those in high authorities to even those that have passed away. I even did the clothing of Pearl and I but the clothing we wore was not extravagant. I have the ability to do such things but I prefer to keep things basic and simple. I also did clothes for the poor who couldn't afford clothes but some will not accept my offerings due to my situation.
There was only one thing I couldn't make, which were the white veils of a bride. They said that if I made one or let alone touched the veil, the bride will be unfaithful and commit the sin I did.
Even though they are all a pack of old fools, it doesn't matter to me because I have found a way to support my family. I love and enjoy doing my needle work. It is like my life, I can express myself through it. But after what has happened to me, there is nothing that made me feel like I belonged here. Every gesture, every word, and the silence of those with whom I come in contact, made me feel small.
Those glares, those silent awful glares that they gave me, ignited the feeling as if I was banished. I stood apart from mortal interests, but I was close beside them; like a ghost revisiting the familiar fireside that can no longer feel its heat. Clergymen will pass me in the street with a mingled grin and frown. They would often stare at me, looking up and down until they saw it. The scarlet letter with all its glory staring back and they will walk away.
It's like a guard.
The children even grew in fear of me.
It's like a monster.
Newcomers will see me walk by and stare. With the look on their face, with their head tilted, they start to wonder about the scarlet letter.
It's like an attention-seeker.
Each and every passing day, it grew more sensitive to me. It was my daily torture.
Coming once from the town square, heading home, I saw children. I smiled at how they played with each other and I held Pearls hand and gave it a squeeze. She looked up and smiled. I smiled back and continued walking home until I felt it. I felt something! I turned around looking where this feeling was coming. Then I found it, it was on the very top of the church, outside on the balcony. A hooded figure looking down upon me and my heart stopped. My body froze and went cold. All of a sudden, everything vanished and the only thing that existed was that hooded figure. As time passed, I started to feel relieved that someone else shared my pain but I started to hyperventilate. The memories that I have hidden deep within my subconscious started resurfacing. Those blue eyes held lust that saw right to my soul. His soft blonde shoulder length hair that tickled my face and neck which sent chills throughout my body. His finger tips, tracing every curve and part of my body that gave my goose bumps. Those lips slightly parted, whispering the only thing that became my downfall.
His breathe hitting that delicate spot on my neck.
His lips brushing against mine.
His fingers intertwined within my hair
'I love you…'
Then it hit me hard, the throbbing pain of this loneliness, this sin that I must carry forever until death. I still couldn't believe this is actually happening to me, but I must suffer the consequences. But I really wonder sometimes…
Am I really the only one?
Am I really the only one to do such a thing?
One time when walking around town, I spotted someone looking at me. Now don't get me wrong, I know I should get used to the stares and glares but this one was different. I saw a young maiden looking at me. She wasn't look directly at me but was staring at something. I followed her gaze and it traced back to the scarlet letter.
Pft. Duh! Why else would she be staring!? It's not like she wants me to be her friend or counselor!
After kicking myself mentally, I looked at her again. I could tell something was different. I wondered what she was thinking about and I observed the girl. She was tall and lean with shiny straight midnight blue that ended right before her waist. She wore a white sun dress with a white She had bangs that would act as a curtain to hide her lovely green eyes. She had her hands clamped together in front of her which made her bosom more noticeable.
I bet she is this town's heartthrob. Hehehehe. Damn it!
After scowling myself again mentally, I saw the girl look at my face and was startled. She had pale skin which enhanced the blush she currently had. She looked at the scarlet letter again, blushed, and hastily walked away.
I shook my head and continued walking. What was that girl's problem? She just kept staring at the scarlet letter like if she was next? Then I realized why her stare was different from all the others. Her eyes revealed past memories making her face express the guilt.
I guess I am not the only one, eh?
After all of these events, I can only think of one thing.
I am going to hell and I am going to make sure I drag every single one of these hypocrites with me.
A/N: So what did you guys think? I had fun writing this chapter. Maybe a little too much fun? Lol. I would love to read your feedback! I apologize for not updating. Things have came up and -sighs-. No matter, I will try my best to update as soon as I can. I hate leaving my readers hanging.
Disclaimer: I almost forgot! I own nothing! :D
Until next time, ~TheLoverOfMusic~