Letter to make ya'll understand the dangers in life.

Do you know how fast life can flash through your eyes? No? Well, it flashes very quickly. One day you be sitting on a park bench having fun with your friends, and the next minute or could have become a murder. I know I've been there. It's sad isn't it? That one minute you could be a sweet little girl with plans to go on an adventure to get away from a family that doesn't take notice to you. Than the instant you step foot off that front porch and take a cautious step into the new life, you find yourself in a field of weed, lying on your back with a sweaty pig lying on top of you. You plead with him to let you go. You beg for him not to do what he's thinking. The next minute your dress is up and there is pain between your legs and the 'man' above you are grunting and oinking like some sweaty fool, just brought him slop.

That's how it was for me. That was my first time. I was only thirteen and I was on an adventure. All I wanted to do was get away. I wanted to get away from my drunkard father, and my mother (who couldn't give a right damn about me if I was the president himself.) I wanted to go to Las Vegas, become a millionaire and move far away. I wanted to on with life have bigger and better things. But that was not what happened for me. Instead I met a man. He took me to a place far away before I had to get outta his car. He had me swindled. But what could I have known I was only thirteen. I called him a name and for the first time in my life I missed my father's drinking. His threat was real. He's through me through the windshield if I called him it again, but too this day I can't remember what it was that I said to him. I just know that I had to get outta his car or I'd be in a world of trouble.

So, I got outta his car and I walked and walked until the sun went down and I was too tired to stand. I got off the road and lie on the hill and fell asleep, only to be woken in the morning with to an odd lady pissin' in my hair. She was a lovely lady. Later, I would think of her as the mother I wanted, even though she wasn't the sort one wanted in a mother. The part that got me was that she cared. I wanted to stay with her; I wanted to be with her. But when that dream ended I headed back home. I wanted to be free of the adult like. Now I knew what to expect when I finally got out in the world and I tell you I was not lookin' forward to it…

But, then I got the nerve up to call home. Momma told me that Pa was dead and that she was moving on with another man. I was hurt and crushed. There on the phone she told me she couldn't come and get me, when I asked, because it was too early and they were in the middle of a celebration. Could you believe it? So, I ran away, I will never see them again. And now I sit here, in the house that use to belong to the mother I wanted to want me; holding my own child and wishing that I had done things different. I love my baby, but the man he reminds me of hurts and I can't do a thing about it.

I can't say that I am happy with the way the events in my life turned out, but I'm happy they happened. I get to tell a story to my child(ren) and one day hope to dissuade them from making the mistakes I made as a child. But now that I think about it, I won't give them a reason to run away.

So, I tell you, all of you out there, cherish what you have and don't let the downside of life make you do something drastic. Because in the end, you'll wish it could have all been different. I hope for the world to read this and heed my advice.

Life ain't handed to ya on a silver platter.

You gotta work hard for what ya need in life, or the consequences will haunt you forever,

Luly