Although the finale did not end the way I would've liked it and although Will did not die, it was still pretty boss. Lots of twists and turns, it was fantastic plot, great acting. It was brilliant. However, as the diehard JJ/Reid Shipper that I am, I was disappointed and saddened.
This begged to be written really and it's a first for me. I've never written one where they DIDN'T become a couple. Maybe next time.
I don't own CM, sadly. Info on Polaris found on the website Read and Review :)
He was staring up at the stars, taking a moment for himself. Since Saturday it seemed like it would never end and they'd never catch the unsubs. He'd never felt so useless than having to stay in Quantico whilst everyone was at the bank, being useful. But more than that, he wanted to be there for JJ, to comfort her and promise her that everything would be alright. And it had been. Will was alright, Henry was alright, everyone was alright.
And now they were married. Will and JJ were husband and wife. Although it was killing him inside, her happiness was all that mattered to him, truly. Still, as he has been watching her walk down the aisle and then pledge to spend the rest of her life with Will, he couldn't help but think or wish really that. . .
It had been him up there, sliding a ring onto her finger, kissing her as the minister pronounced them as Mr. and Mrs. Spencer Reid. Spencer smiled to himself, looking down, shifting his weight and leaning against the wooden barrier that surrounded the porch. It has been a good night, even if there was something going on with Emily. She had been smiling a little too brightly, and her eyes were slightly more glassy than normal, and he knew it wasn't the champagne.
Spencer looks back up at the sky, his eyes searching for . . . there. Exactly where it's supposed to be. It's the star in the sky that never fails to do its job and will never change.
He hears her first, her heels clicking against the floor and stops just behind them. He feels her warm hand on his shoulder and lean in closer to him.
"Hey." Her voice is soft and filled with warmth.
"What are you looking at?" She asks and he turns to face her.
"Just the stars. Shouldn't you be inside?" He asks, nodding towards the house. The party had moved inside where the BAU team was scattered around the living room, laughing and reminiscing.
"I would be, except that I realized that we never got to dance together." JJ tells him with a smile.
"We didn't?" Hmm, well in that case. . ." he takes her hand and leads her off the porch and toward the dance floor. The band has already gone and the only music they had were the laughter of their family and the beating of their hearts. Spencer holds her at an appropriate distance, one hand resting on her upper back, the other holding her hand. Her free hand rests on his shoulder and they begin to sway gently. He begins to hum under his breath and she chuckles, recognizing the tune. At the sound of her chuckle, Spencer smiles and begins to sing.
"Some day when I'm awfully low, when the world is cold. I will feel a glow just thinking of you"
Here he gently spins her around, her surprised laughter infectious, making him laugh as well.
"And the way you look tonight."
She spins back into his embrace, smiling widely at his now discovered dancing ability. She moves closer to him, sliding her arm around his neck, their bodies inches apart.
"Lovely. . . never, never change. Keep that breathless charm. Won't you please arrange it? "Cause I love you."
He settles his hand on her back and gently dips her. She closes her eyes, feeling so at peace in his arms. Slowly he brings her back up, singing the final line of the song.
"Just the way you look tonight."
"I didn't know you could sing. Or dance." She confesses and he smiles, looking down at her. "There's a lot you don't know about me."
"Still?" She teases and he laughs.
"Touché." They're now swaying gently in place, the others completely forgotten.
"What stars were you looking specifically?" JJ asks softly. He gives her a half smile.
"What makes you think I was looking for any one particular star?"
"Uh, because I know you." He nods, conceding to that.
"I was looking at Polaris."
"The North Star." Spencer looks at JJ, surprised at her knowledge.
"Oh, what you're the only person allowed to know things?" She asks with a teasing smile.
"No, no of course not."
"Tell me about it. You must have been looking at it for a reason."
Spencer looks up at the sky. "It's the only star that exists only in the Northern Hemisphere. You can use it for navigation and locate it by finding the Big Dipper. Helps people find where they are." He looks down at JJ, continuing softly. "It's Earth's true north." Their faces are inches apart. They only thing keeping them apart is his morals and her wedding ring.
"Do you ever wonder what would have happened if . . ." JJ begins, trailing off.
"If things had been different?"
He looks away for a moment. "Let me ask you a question. If I hadn't developed a drug addiction and pushed you away . . . do you think this could've been us?"
JJ looks at him for a long moment. She knows what her answer is, and she knows this is the only time they will ever talk about it. "Yes. I know for a fact that I could've very easily fallen in love with you, Spence. I could've easily married you and had a family with you. You and I are two sides of the same coin, however different we may appear sometimes."
They're not moving, her arm still around his neck, her free hand resting on his chest. Both of his hands are resting on her hips gently.
"I wonder all the time, Jennifer. I look at you and I can't help but think that could've been me. I could've been Henry's father, been your husband." Spencer reaches up and gently cups her face between his hands. "Are you happy?"
She doesn't hesitate. "Yes. I am happy."
He gives a genuine smile, moving his hands back to their original place. "Then that's all that matters for me. I only want you to be happy."
JJ inhales deeply, reaching up with her right hand and tenderly caressing his face. "You will always be my best friend. Henry's godfather. My Spence." She leans forward, resting her forehead against his.
"I love you, Spence."
"I love you, too. I'll always be here for you." He pulls away slightly and she smiles at him, knowing that in another life, she would've totally been his.
"You are my True North, Spencer Reid."
He laughs, beaming at the compliment.
"And you're mine as well."
Spencer takes her hand, and leads her back onto the porch. She tells him she'll be right behind him and looks to the sky, her eyes searching for . . . there.
Her North Star.