Hey ! I know it's been a while since I wrote anything, but I just had this idea in mind ! Hope you'll enjoy it and leave a review ! Your opinion is always welcomed !
When he walked into the warehouse, and faced her for the first time since he had saved her life in court, Paul Kellerman suddenly remembered of the first time he saw Sara Tancredi. In his car, with tinted windows, only slightly opened, through the material of his dark sunglasses. She was just walking down the street, her face hidden from him, until a welcomed blast of wind went to tousle her silky hair, she turned around and he only caught a glimpse of her face before she left his sight, she wouldn't remember this, for the simple reason that she hadn't seen him then, she hadn't met him until much later, but he would remember, he would remember everything, the dark black shirt she was wearing and the way it embraced her curves, the wind blowing in her flaming auburn hair, and her scent carried by the wind only to fly to his nostrils and fill them entirely, until Sara Tancredi was all he could breathe.
He was about 90 per cent sure that the emotions he felt for her weren't love, perhaps if he had known what love was he would have had a clearer idea, but his only sight of love for the moment was Caroline Reynolds, and if they had been in love, long ago, now it was more of an eternal battle for control, for domination, and that was why he was pretty sure the feelings he had for Sara Tancredi couldn't be love, because he wasn't even slightly aware that love could make a person happy. So he didn't consider it as love, he considered it as simple want, desire, because she intrigued him, because she would never want him and because he would never have her. And how he wish he could, have her, just once, so he could finally get her out of his system, get her out of his brain, get her out of his bloodstream that she had even gotten into.
But as he looked at her this time, he could clearly see that she would hate him as long as he would live. Of course she was hiding it, she knew that she had to contain her own emotions right now, Paul absently wondered how far politeness can go, but he was too busy studying her emotions to go further in the interrogation. It was so obvious, oh yes, she hated him, despised him with all of her being, and he could guess how much she had to hate the situation right now. But it wasn't up to her boyfriend anymore, or his brother, or her. So she'd deal with it, her own way, masking her emotions as well as she could. Oh well... if she could hide them, maybe he could too.
"It's nice to see you again, Sara" He said as professionally as possible, after saluting the rest of the team the same way.
Sara looked down at the hand he was extending. It was a peace offering, she knew it was, but to her it looked like a trick, it looked like a big bad wolf who had dipped his paws into flour to hide his true colors, and if she took the hand he was offering, than she was the stupid lamb who was going to get eaten. She looked behind her shoulder to meet Michael's eyes, the mere thought that he was right behind her was already enough for her to feel safer, he smiled weakly at her, but she was unable to smile back, so he simply, lightly, nodded. Sara turned back at Paul and slid her hand in his to shake it briefly and remove it quickly, thinking that she was going to have to wash them twice after that.
Paul couldn't hold back a smile, as he thought in a corner of his mind that even though she probably hated his guts, at least she respected him slightly, maybe because he was going to help her boyfriend and his brother to get exonerated, or maybe because he had saved her life in court. Or maybe that last one was just another reason to hate him even more.
"You know it's only a matter of weeks." Michael whispered.
Sara didn't answer, her eyes were wide open, her head resting on her boyfriend's chest, as he peacefully slid his fingers through her soft hair in a calming motion.
"In two, or three weeks," Michael pursued, "all of this will be behind us."
Sara lift up her head a little bit just so she could look at him.
"You really think that ?" She asked, "That we can get Scylla and bring down the company ? I mean it just sounds so..."
She shook her head, unable to find comparisons.
"I know" Michael said, "It sounds impossible, but we're not alone on this, I mean we have a whole team here, even though I don't like him, Kellerman's a good asset, he worked with them, with the company, he can make himself useful."
"I guess." Sara said after a while of silence, as she let her head rest on Michael's chest again, as he entwined his fingers in her hair one more time, making her feel strangely peaceful. "It's just..." Sara said, "I... I don't like this."
"You think I do ?" Michael said softly, "Sara, I hate this, I hate that we have to work with these people, with this guy, I'd like to strangle him until he chokes to death, but I know we have to be smarter about this."
He smiled warmly. "Because if we stand through this," He said, "in a few weeks, a month top, we'll be together, on a beach, drinking cheap beers, with a big cloudless sky and years and years to live."
Sara smiled lightly at the description.
"And even though I'd like to kill this guy, Sara," Michael said, "I think I want this life even more."
"I think I do too" Sara said, her eyes closing slowly, as she felt tiredness win her over. "Are you staying tonight ?" She asked.
"I'd love to" He said, "But I got some work to do."
He posed a tender kiss on her cheek before he reluctantly broke their embrace. He got up, and put his clothes on.
"I love you" He said with one last look on her.
"I love you too." She said smiling lightly as he left her alone in the boat cabin.
She felt a strange feeling overwhelm her once she was alone. This team, this whole place, it just felt so... unreal. But again, life with Michael Scofield felt unreal, she should be used to it by the time, but... this ? Being here, it felt so... big. Her eyes remained wide open for a while until she shook her head, shaking the idea out of her mind, as she snuggled against herself, hugging the covers close, her head sinking in the soft pillow. She was hoping that maybe, if he finished early, Michael would be back before morning. He had been sharing her bed for a week now, but he had never stayed the night or been there when she awoke. Absently, she wondered if, in their future life he kept promising her, it'd be the same, if he would stay working late at night, and she'd find herself alone in their bed.
She didn't want to think like this, and she shouldn't, but as long as she had known him, Michael Scofield had promised her that things would get better "after". After what ? Oh so many things, after she'd leave the door open, after they'd be out of prison, after the company would be off their backs, and now it was after they had find six Scylla cards that could be the end of all their troubles. Only, every time Michael had said this to her, things had only got worse, after she did whatever it was he had asked.
But she guessed, that deep down, she didn't care, not enough anyway, because if she did, she would have left, long ago, so maybe their problems weren't that big. Or maybe her blind love for him was just bigger. Big enough for her to stand to work with her former torturer, that was for sure.
She really shouldn't resent Michael for this, after all, it wasn't his fault, it wasn't his call, but she guessed maybe, deep down, she was hoping he'd get all macho and manlike and yelled that if that bastard wasn't off the team he'd quit. But that wasn't his type, she knew it, he knew better, he was smarter than this. But still, maybe secretly, she had hoped for this in a corner of her mind, even though even she knew that having Kellerman on the team really was a good asset. He could be useful, she didn't doubt that, it was just that... he was like a wolf, no, more like a snake, every word coming out of his mouth was a lie, a vice, every smile he made was enough to send shivers down her spine, and his eyes on her were like... like... she couldn't even put a name on it. And even though she knew that there was nothing that could be done, that Kellerman would indeed stay here, she would have wanted Michael to try, she would have wanted him to freak out and not be able to concentrate when standing next to that man. But she knew that even though Michael loved her, as much as he was capable of loving, she knew he didn't love in that kind of love, the kind that says "you hurt her and that's the last thing you ever do", he wouldn't ever kill someone who had hurt her, not because he didn't love her enough for it, just because it wasn't who he was.
And then suddenly, so oddly that it made Sara's eyes that had started to close open wide and aware, she wondered if Paul Kellerman would ever kill someone for her, someone that had hurt her. Of course not, why would he ? But Sara suddenly found herself thinking that somehow, he wouldn't want her to get hurt, not because of love, but possessively, he had hurt her himself, but if someone else ever did he'd put a bullet in their brain.
And just like that, Sara realized how it was, that Paul Kellerman looked at her : As if she was his.
Sara was awake long before the sun was up. She hadn't yet gotten used to the fact that you could hear everything that happened in that warehouse, everything anybody did. She suddenly felt herself panic as she wondered if maybe the rest of the team had heard her and Michael last night, they weren't very loud, but still... As she heard someone cough from the second floor, she concluded that they probably had. Her cheeks flushed red, great, that was really all she needed right now, that a bunch of ex cons and spies whom she would have to team with for the next few weeks, heard her having sex. She decided that Michael and her would have to be more careful from now on.
She tried to get up several times, but she really wasn't in the mood to face "the team", especially after what they might have heard last night, and also, she was kind of letting Michael a chance to join her. She waited until eight to get up, he wasn't coming and she was done waiting. She put some clothes on, before getting down from the boat, and out of the room, only to find Michael buried in maps, and tons of paper, his fist against his forehead, he was obviously, very concentrated.
"Morning" She whispered behind him, snaking her arms around his chest.
"Morning" He responded with a quick look towards her and the shadow of a smile.
"Guess you really do have a lot of work" She said only to say something, "Aren't the others up yet ?"
"They worked till late last night." Michael answered.
"So did you" She noticed and he didn't reply. "So..." She said, "I was going to go get some coffee down the street, you want one ?"
"Sure" He answered without turning to her this time, "Thanks."
"You're welcome" She said in almost a whisper as she let her hands fall to her sides, and walked away, and out the exit door.
It was a sunny day, although there were very few days that weren't sunny in Miami, this day announced itself quite exceptional. She'd have to wait and see.
Sara walked down the street, and went inside a café, she ordered twelve drinks, thinking after a little consideration that she might as well take some for everyone in the team. She kind of regretted it afterwards, because she didn't like the idea of being the only woman in the team, who is only here to sleep with the leader and make the coffees. It was way too cliché.
When she went back to the warehouse everyone was already up, and working on the same files Michael had been studying the same morning. Sara spotted Paul in a corner of the room, a file in his hands, and she knew that she could never even pretend to be indifferent to his presence. He suddenly looked up from his paper to meet her eyes and she looked away immediately, putting the coffees on the table.
"Hey guys" She said trying to put on a smile, "I brought coffee." If she was going to play this role she was at least going to play it right.
"Thanks, baby" Michael said smiling genuinely as he looked back at her, brushing her shoulder with his hand, in what was meant to be an affectionate gesture, but looked more like a man petting his dog. He seemed to realize it as guilty look flashed on his face, so he placed a kiss on her cheek in a silent apology. I'm sorry I didn't stay the night. She smiled weakly, before their moment was gone and he grabbed a coffee and went back to work.
She threw a glance at the paperwork, but it didn't take much studying to know for sure that she couldn't help, not with this, the only help she could provide was when they needed a distraction, for a guard or something, then they could use her feminine assistance. Wow, she really was starting to sound like a stereotype.
As she mumbled some excuse about getting some air, she threw one last look towards Kellerman, and she was surprised to see that he was looking at her too, this time she didn't lower her eyes. For the first time, since she had looked at him, there was no mockery, nor struggle for control, nor lie in this man's eyes, and for the first time, it occurred to her that maybe, maybe, behind the wolf, or the snake, or whatever the animal inside him was, Paul Kellerman was human, and had a conscience, some humanity, and a soul.
She was the first one to look away, she didn't know how much longer his eyes remained on her, or even stayed watching the exact same spot minutes after she was gone.
It turned out there was still one thing Sara hadn't seen in him that morning, something she couldn't see, something she couldn't even conceive. That beyond having committed crimes that should have deserved death penalty, beyond having a darken soul and some blood on his hands, he also had a heart.
Only it wasn't beating yet.