A/N Here is the Crowen that so many of you have been waiting for.
Years from now Owen Hunt would only remember a few things about the weeks following the devastating plane crash. He would only remember how he felt when Meredith called him five weeks into Cristina's recovery. He wouldn't remember the five hour plane ride or the forty-five minute drive to the hospital. He would also remember how she looked the first time he laid eyes on her. His wife was an amazing woman. Stronger than he ever imagined she could be. Yet when he saw her, he saw pain. He saw fear and he saw sadness. All feelings that knew Cristina had worked hard not to feel.
He wasn't sure if she would voluntarily talk to him. So he sat beside her without saying a word. He was going to let her set the pace. If she wanted to talk, then great. If not, then that was okay too.
"Lexie died." Cristina whispered. She still could hardly believe that one of her residents and Meredith's sister was dead. Lexie was a special woman and doctor and Cristina found herself feeling things that she worked so hard not to feel.
"Yeah she did." Owen confirmed quietly. He wasn't all that close to Lexie but he knew that Lexie was important to many of those people in his hospital.
"I don't…I don't know what to feel." Cristina admitted quietly. She knew that it was okay to feel sadness or anger or shock. She didn't think it was okay to feel it more than Meredith or Mark did. Those two had loved Lexie fiercely. Cristina had barely tolerated her.
"Cristina, that's okay. No one thinks you need to feel a certain way." Owen reassured her softly. He was surprised when Cristina's head found his shoulder. She rarely ever sought out affection like that.
"I need to get out of here. People keep dying here and I can't deal with it anymore." Cristina admitted. She vaguely remembered saying that she needed to get the hell out of Seattle and away from Seattle Grace Mercy Death when they were still stuck in the heavily wooded area in which the plane had gown down in.
"Okay, if that's what you want. I'll resign from the Chief of Surgery position at the hospital and I'll come with you to Mayo." Owen told her quietly. He knew that finding a job for him at Mayo would be difficult but if this was what Cristina wanted, he'd be dammed if she went to Mayo without him. Teddy's last words to him before she left was that he needed to fight for her. Owen was more than prepared to do exactly that. Cristina was surprised that Owen was so willing to resign from his prestigious position at Seattle Grace-Mercy West and come with her. Especially since she knew that getting a job at Mayo would be difficult for him. She wanted him to come but only if he wouldn't resent her for taking him away from a sure thing in Seattle to an uncertain thing in Minnesota.
"But…" Cristina whispered. She wasn't used to this feeling. Being with Owen and feeling his love for her was something that Cristina never thought she would need so desperately. She knew Meredith could never understand how she could forgive Owen for cheating. A part of Cristina didn't understand it either. All she knew was that she loved Owen.
They were two damaged souls. Him from Iraq and her from many, much smaller things: Her father's death, her mother's remarriage, her relationship with Colin Marlowe, her relationship with Burke. Those were only in her personal life. She also had the memories of doing heart surgery on her person's husband just two years ago. And now? Now she had been in a plane crash that had killed one of the best fourth year residents she had ever known.
"But nothing. I love you Cristina. I'll go to Mayo with you if that's what you want." Owen told her. He knew that there was still a possibility that she would say no in order to protect herself and after everything that Owen had put her through during their nearly two year marriage, he wouldn't be surprised if she refused him.
"Okay…Let's go to Mayo." Cristina whispered. She couldn't believe that they were going to do this. As much as she said that she needed to get out of here, the thought of leaving her person who had been there for her so much in the past five years was beyond terrifying for her.
Owen was her husband, but Meredith was her best friend. Logically she knew that her husband should have been her person and she knew that Meredith's person should have been Derek. But that's not how the arrangement worked. She knew that both men didn't understand it, but they didn't need to.
"Good, I'll turn in my resignation the board when I return to Seattle." Owen told her. Cristina nodded slowly as she reached for his hand. Owen was surprised once again. Cristina wasn't one to show affection that much. Even to him, which sometimes bothered him, though he never let it show.
"I'm sorry." Cristina whispered. Her apology was for so many things that had gone on in their marriage. They had discussed the fact that Cristina didn't want children but then she was careless with her birth control. The abortion had not been an easy decision to make even if it had seemed like that to others. If she had decided to have it, she would have been significantly pregnant at this time. The baby probably wouldn't have survived the crash.
"I'm sorry too." Owen told her. He had things he needed to apologize for as well. Not so much the choking incident that had happened years ago, but for his recent infidelity. Being with that other woman was…it was different. He had been with Cristina so long that he had forgotten what it was like to be wanted by another woman. He had regretted it the moment it was over. He found himself praying that Cristina wouldn't find out. He should have known that, that prayer wasn't going to be answered. He didn't realize that he would be the one breaking the news to her though.
Cristina didn't want to think of that other woman. She had been through so much hell since that day six weeks ago, that the other woman didn't seem important anymore. Owen was here with her and that counted. That counted big time. Tentatively Owen put his arms around her and surprisingly Cristina let him. She felt safe in his arms despite everything that had gone on. In his arms was where she felt the most relaxed she had felt in the past six weeks.
"I love you." Cristina murmured softly. Whispering words of love was not something that Cristina was good at or even used to. She just remembered thinking on that day six weeks ago that she may never get to say those three words to Owen ever again. Now that he was here, holding her in his arms Cristina wanted to say it over and over again.
"I love you too Cristina. God I love you so much." Owen whispered back. He tried not to think of that day. He was still so angry at himself for having the calls held. Boise had called several times and by the time he had gotten to the many messages on his phone it was nightfall. He had worked round the clock to make sure that the people on that flight were found. When he heard that there had been a fatality, he remembered hoping and praying that Cristina was not the fatality. When they received the name of the deceased, Owen remembered breathing a sigh of relief. It wasn't Cristina. His Cristina was safe. He knew he was being selfish. He knew that Meredith and Mark would be devastated but just for a moment he allowed himself to feel relief that Cristina was alive.
"Can you hold me until I fall asleep?" Cristina whispered. That snapped Owen out of his trip down memory lane. Cristina was suddenly feeling tired and she knew that she would only sleep well if Owen was holding her.
"Yes, try and get some sleep. I'm right here." Owen whispered against her black hair. He held her as she quickly drifted off to sleep. He remembered what Meredith had said about Cristina being different and he couldn't help but disagree with her slightly. Yes Cristina was different but Owen wasn't sure if the change was a bad thing. She was being more affectionate than she had ever been before. She was seeking him out to comfort her. Maybe this was still the PTSD thing, something that Owen understood well. He wasn't quite sure yet. He was still worried about her and he hoped that the move to Minnesota would help her and them heal from this tragedy. Owen didn't sleep. He sat on the bed holding an obviously exhausted Cristina for a long time.