A/N: OMG! I started a new fic! This time . . . Super Smash Brothers! I love playing SSBB. I love the characters. And I love Lucas. Naturally, I must write a fic. Why I did this? 'Cause Ness and Lucas make one of the best couples ever, plus, I was high. I think. This is a sorta crack-fic, I guess. It had little meaning. It's funny. Holds some weird drama. All you need for an awesome story. BAM! I'm so magical! Like Harry Potter!

Disclaimer: I only own the plot and a few other things. SSBB © Nintendo.

Beware of the leafs~!

So Out of Your League

Written by Sonic1615


It's not that moving is bad. In reality, moving can be one of the greatest experiences of someone's life. The new place, the people, all attractions in the area, plus more. Getting situated at first can be problematic - speaking mainly of school and friends - but everyone will adjust with time. People still get to stay in touch with their other friends, obviously. Maybe not face-to-face. The internet or letters are more popular for these things. The phone works too. Like, for instance, if you were too lazy to pick up the damn pencil and write mindless squiggles on a piece of paper. Or if you didn't have the mental capability to turn on a computer and access the webs of inter. Basically, you'd be too dumb to dial numbers on the phone either. It all depends on who you are. And being Lucas, he didn't really think of trying any option provided.

That's right, Lucas had to move from his small little village-town thingy to an overcrowded town at the end of February. Couldn't his parents just wait a few more months to move? No, it had to be now. If not, the apocalypse would surely be upon them, cursing them without omelets for weeks to come. The horror of just thinking about it. It just sends shivers down your spine, right?

"Dad, tell me again, why on earth did we have to move?" Lucas lazily shifted against their family's car door, facing his father in the driver's seat.

His dad let out a tired sigh. "For the sextillionth time, Lucas, I got a job here that pays more money. We could use it. Or would you rather be working in a calculating business full of taxes and over-animated coffee smells? And I'm still not sure we're on earth anymore."

Visibly scrunching his nose, Lucas stuck out his tongue in the "yuck, calculations" way.

"You know Dad, Lucas is right. We could of waited until summer to move. Moving in the middle of school year isn't the smartest thing to do." Claus, Lucas's older twin brother, suddenly spoke up. Huh, Lucas thought he was asleep or dead.

They couldn't see, but both boys knew their dad had rolled his eyes. They could feel it. "Yes, I do know. But it's better to get started then to be completely new the next year."

Claus sniffed. "And how is that easier?"

"Oh my God, I don't know, okay? I'm your father and the both of you will learn to respect my decision without question, understand?" Ah, the lovely stress brought by early mornings and driving for over two days straight.

"Ugh, fine, whatever." Lucas banged his head on the window, Claus following suit.

Lucas didn't reject the idea fully when it presented itself back in his old town, Tazmily. True, it did come pretty much at random, but still.

All four of them were having a normal family dinner: Chicken cooked on a plate. Surely a delicacy. It was a perfect day to be doing something different, and that's just what Lucas's dad was about to make happen.

"Boys, I have some important news for you two."

Both looked up from their meal, keeping their eyes on their father.

"Lucas, Claus, we're moving out of Tazmily."

Wait . . . Wait . . . Wait . . . There.


"Exactly. Me and your mother were discussing this for a while now and came to the conclusion of we need more money. I got a good job there that'll pay more than the one I currently have."

Face-mashed potatoes. When the palm just isn't enough.

Their dad's face dropped. "Now Lucas, you didn't have to go and ruin your dinner over it."

His face snapped back up. "I didn't, did I? How so? You just go ahead and decide to move without consulting Claus or me? Did you think we wouldn't of cared?" He was out of his seat, arms supporting his body over the table, glaring daggers at his father with ice-cold eyes.

"Actually, no, I didn't think either of you would care much."

Oh my . . . Who was the dense one here?

"Mom! You didn't tell us either? And you knew?" This time Claus was up, looking shocked at his mother.

She tried giving her warmest smile. At this moment, it couldn't do squat. "Oh, it's not so bad. Just think about it, huh? You two will meet new people, go to a different school, and have lots of fun! I even got a small job, too."

Excuse me?

"What? Aren't you our 'stay at home mom' and not one that works? At least that's what I got." The older twin crossed his arms furiously. Or something.

Their mom wasn't fazed. "It won't be a long hour job. Something simple for a little extra money. Wouldn't you both enjoy that? I think it would be great. I'll still be home in time to make dinner, so the both of you don't need to worry about that. Even though you are capable of taking care of yourself."

There she was right. Thirteen year old boys should be able to care for themselves whenever. It's just that the effort took to make food, fold laundry, wash dishes, go to the bathroom . . . it was all so difficult! Why couldn't adults see that? Moreover, parents.

Lucas knew trying to change their minds would be to no avail. Sigh, such a drag.

Puffing his cheeks out, he collapsed right back into his chair with an audible thump, crossing his arms in the process. "Fine."

Claus, on the other hand, wasn't so easily forgiving. He gritted his teeth. "Worst. Parents. Ever." After that, he marched right up the stairs.

"I'll put your dinner in the fridge, honey!" Their mom waved at the pissed off boy.

Only one thing to do at a time like this . . . Face-floor. When the potatoes just aren't enough.

Ah, memories. Such a valuable thing. When those memories aren't screwed up, in your own opinion. I mean, come on! Who doesn't consult their own children about something as big as moving for Christ's sake! What is this? Mars? No, wait, everyone's breathing. Last time it was checked, Mars really didn't hold good standards for supporting humans. Or anything else. Usually people, and everything else, needed oxygen for living. Boo, Mars, you suck. What purpose do you have? You just sit there floating all day in space without a freaking care in the world. It's just plain rude, you know. Why not help the other planets? Do something for a change.

"Hey, Mom, are we there yet?" It was Claus. Always the impatient one.

"About five more minutes until we reach the town, dear."

"Ergh," he threw his head back at the window.

Lucas acknowledged this. His blue eyes followed their surroundings outside the window; he saw grass and a few stray houses, mainly farms. Small knolls could be seen out in the distance, along with something that looked like a patch of colorful flowers in the distance. He blinked. They didn't come into focus any better. Maybe he should check that out later . . .? It sure looked nice.

"Hey Mom, could I go out there sometime?" He signaled with his finger towards the flower patch.

His mother followed his direction. "Hmm? Oh, sure. When we get situated enough at the new town."

Lucas nodded, then another thought came to mind. One that was never answered before. "What's the town called?"

Clause looked curious, too.

Their father answered, "Smashopolis. And the school you'll be attending supports the eighth through twelfth graders. It's called Smashers Academy. I've heard it's really good."

Smashopolis? Sounds cheesy. It sounded like you were smashing smash and Acropolis together in a hurry to find something suitable for a name. People these days sure have no imagination. Wait a second . . .

"Did you say eighth through twelfth graders?" Lucas had to gulp. With all those older kids there, he was sure to have trouble coping to the new school. "You're kidding."

A dull laugh passed through their father's lips. "Nah, I'm not kidding. But don't worry, Lucas, Claus will be there for you."

His face reddened considerably. "W-what? I can take fine care of myself! He's just a few minutes older than me!"

Lies. "You sure about that?"

Ha! "No . . ."

"See? Now, Claus, won't you take care of your brother?"

The other scoffed. "Well, duh."

Their father smiled. "Good. I just hope the two of you have some classes together."

That was it. Lucas's face stiffened. What if they didn't see each other the entire time? What would happen if there were bullies? One's that would hate him for no reason at all? Ugh, a lot of things are possible at a new school. In the middle of the freaking year. Life is so fair, right? Ha, don't make me laugh. Life is like peanut butter: Sometimes it's smooth, and other time it's hard with bumps. Yum.

"Oh my God!" Their father jumped, hit his head off the ceiling, and pointed out the window.

"What?" Both twins exclaimed in unison.

His eyes darkened. "A leaf. Stupid little vermin. They always get in your way when you're driving."

Lucas's face twisted into some combination of "the fudge muffins?" and "welp, that's interesting." And wasn't it just?

"Uh, Dad, it's just a leaf." Claus said.

The air seemed to become colder.

"No, my son. No. Leafs are dangerous creatures created by God for the punishment of mankind. Horrid little things. They were much more worse in the past, though. Towns being swarmed by those green devils. There was this one time-"

Claus' hands cut the conversation off. "Okay! I get it! Leafs are a big no no."

A nod of approval. "Correct. Thank you."

While that was happening, Lucas could only think of one thing: What did Dad take this morning? Maybe it's just stress driving. The thought of his father acting over small things like this made the young boy's eye twitch. Huh? Leafs? Nobody reacted that way. Or . . . did they? Is Lucas the crazy one? Should he be fussing over things like his milk being too white? The carpet feeling soft? The way birds could fly in the sky? I mean, seriously? Why the sky? Why not underwater? Even if that'd technically be called swimming. Underwater flying. Much better name than that swimming crap. Who invents these words anyways? They need a better imagination. Get'em drugged up on sugar or something.

Any hoodledoodles, back to the leaf crisis.

"Gaa! They're everywhere! Do you all see them? On the road? Right there!" His finger could rival a machine gun's rapid fire right about now.

Lucas, seeing nothing different, planted his face against the window frame once more. He was tired. He was hungry. He was bored. His butt hurt. He needed to pee. He wished they would just hurry and get to their new house already so he could pee in peace. It felt so uncomfortable, especially with the way he had to sit. Stupid car. Stupid new house. Stupid town. Stupid leaves.

With all the arguing, the trip seemed to triple in time to Lucas. Not to mention the pee.

"Dad? Is this it? Is this the house?"

"Yes, take a good look at it."

They drove to somewhere within the middle of town, and there was their house. It was average-sized, nothing big or fancy. The houses outer walls were blue, sapphire in the bright sunshine. The roof was sloped and pretty much a seafoam green color with a red chimney poking out. There was a white fence, simple and plain, surrounding the whole house, and towards the left was a small garden. One that could be used to plant sunflowers. That'd make the house even better. With the view Lucas had right now, he couldn't see if there was a backyard, but he was pretty sure there was. Speaking of yards, the front was big enough, so that should give Boney good room to move around in. And that thought brought a question. A rather important one.

"Hey, Dad, where's Boney?"

"Oh, in the trunk."

That small sentence brought a huge silence upon the entire car. Even Mom was speechless. Claus had a blank stare. Lucas, one the other hand, was almost in hysterics. His breathing was way too rapid to be considered normal. It sorta sounded like a machine if you listened closely. Ha, that's funny. Hyperventilating. It's a big word, too. But, the overall problem, was that their dad had decided to put an alive animal in the trunk. Such a smart man. Such a smart, smart man.

"You what?" Everyone went ballistic.

Who put a dog in the trunk? It could've just ridden with Claus and Lucas in the backseat, but no. Their genius of a father had to put it in the back. What is the world coming to? Mom, Claus, and Lucas were furious. Sadly, Dad didn't realize he had done something so horrid.

"Dear, did you know that putting a dog in the trunk could, um, kill it?" Their mom tried for a gentle approach.

Behind relaxed eyes, a brain started to put two and two together. "Oh God! I killed Boney!" Tears rapidly ran down his face. A grown man crying? Now this was comic gold.

Their mom saw the problem. "No! I'm sure Boney isn't dead! Let's just get 'em out right now, alright?"

After a few more second of tears, their dad calmed down. "You're right. Let's get out. It's stuffed in here."

Lucas gave out a content sigh. He'd be peeing soon enough.

Throwing open the door, Lucas ran faster than the car straight to the house, forgetting the whole "Boney" matter. Sure, no one told him the direction of the bathroom, but that's what toilet senses are for. Just sense the bathroom and you'll get there. Charging up the set of stairs, then down the short hallway, the blonde boy stumbled upon the desired bathroom. And sitting right in the corner was a nice porcelain toilet. The toilet god, in Lucas's opinion.

Hurrying over in a penguin fashion, he quickly unzipped his jeans, feeling about ready to explode. He needed to go now. Finally, the zipper was down. Getting situated, he relieved himself of all excess liquids not needed in his lower area. That is the fancy word for peeing. You like? It's very nice.

Lucas swore he was in the bathroom for well over a minute of none-stop peeing in a toilet. That's just how long he had to hold it. Anyone would have done the same, or else they be crazy and messed up in the head. Thinking that, he flushed. Walking over to the sink, he also realized they didn't bring up the soap. Or anything, for that matter. Oh well. He rinsed with just hot water, drying his hands on his pants. He felt so much better. Like it was the best thing in the world. Nodding, Lucas exited the bathroom and went down the stairs to help with anything that needed to be done.

"Ah, Lucas! Did you get to see any rooms?" His mother came from something that looked like a kitchen.

He set his destination towards her. "The bathroom. It's nice, but needs soap and towels."

She laughed. "Come help us unpack. We can't do it all by ourselves. And Boney's out running around."

Lucas let out a sigh he didn't know he was holding. "Oh, good. Glad Boney's okay."

"Me too. Your father can be so dense sometimes, but he's a hardworking man." She signaled with her hand for him to follow. "Come on, we'll go explore the front yard."

It was just as pretty as it first looked. Lucas smiled at a stray sunflower already growing in the garden. Boney sniffed at it. Claus was being forced to carry boxes by the load. Their father was doing the same, while giving out orders. Their mother only grabbed boxes with certain material she wanted at the moment. Like kitchen supplies.

"Hey, Lucas, why don't you help me out?" Lucas could hear Claus' voice, a little rough from the strain taken to lift the boxes. "Don't just sit there and be lazy."

"Huh? Oh, okay." Not one to refuse his brother, he took a small box from the car and trotted over to the house's door. Looking around, he entered the living room, setting it on the couch. Wait . . . couch?

"Mom! Why's are furniture here already?"

She came in. "The movers set it up before we got here. Don't worry, I scheduled that."


The house smelt nice. Mainly the living room. It kinds smelled like . . . cheese? No. Notebooks? No. Plastic containers? Still not it. Hmm, oh! It smelt like new house smell! Yeah! Lucas loved that smell. But why would it be here? Such a mystery.

A/N: How was it? Weird? I hope so! Dur *falls out of chair* I planned it to be that way! *poofs back* I know Lucas's family ain't in SSBB, but I wanted to add them since Earthbound is in SSBB. So ha! You got nothing on me! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH! I think I had too much chocolate. I need more. This story will probably be written whenever I feel like it.