Going back to change the Future
Blood seeped through his wounds. His vision blurred as he stared off into space, thinking of how different it could have been. They could have won. They could be in the common room celebrating the defeat of the dark lord. Instead, they were mourning the dead, and the dark lord was celebrating his victory. He had won and Harry laid on the cold cement bleed out. He tried to look for his friends, he tried to find anyone on the light that was still standing, but all he could manage was to roll his eyes before they rested skyward. Tears of frustration and anger rolled down his cheeks, and tears of guilt and hopelessness mingled with them. He cursed himself; he cursed the many people who put so much faith in, trust in him, to keep them safe, to keep them alive. To free them from the dark lord that was Voldemort. A shutter leaped through his body. What would the rest of life be like now that Voldemort lived? More tears involuntarily sprang to his eyes and he fought back the urge to sob.
Harry tried to look around. He tried to distinguish the sound of the voice from the rush of air that was suddenly in his ears.
"Oh, god, Potter!"
He winced as his body was scooped gently into someone arms. He could feel hot liquid racing down the back of his neck, mixing with his hair in the angle he was lying in.
"Oh, god no… No, Lily… Lily I'm sorry. I'm sorry…"
The person holding him came into his line of vision and he would have gasped if he could have. Instead he took a shuddering breath and muttered in a voice barely above a whisper.
"Shhh, Pot-Harry, it's alright. You're going to be alright."
Harry tried to shake his head, but when pain erupt through his entire body he thought better of it.
"N-not going-g to m-make it," Harry gasped out, "Sorry… Tried… Can't…"
"It's alright, Harry, you should not have had to do this. You should…"
"'So 'kay, should have tried…. Harder…"
Harry wanted to say more, but he couldn't fight the darkness that was closing in on him. His body jerked as if he was struck with the Cruciatus Curse. For an instant Snape didn't know what to do. But when he heard the hiss of his name when it falls from the dark lord's mouth, he suddenly knew what he had to do. Discreetly, he pulled out his wand. Cautiously, he lent down to the shaking boy's ear and whispered,
"I know you may not want it, Harry, but I will give you another chance to train and to get rid of the dark lord once and for all. Maybe than you can change some things, maybe we can star over…"
The boy's body ceased his trashing, and was slowly going limp. Severus knew he had to act fast. He pointed his wand at Harry.
"I'm going to send you back in time Harry. I haven't tested this spell properly, but I know it works. I just don't know where you'll end up. Please, take care of yourself, Potter, and destroy this imbecilic once and for all. …Recipio."
Harry's body began to glow a light purple before he started flashing. Severus watched in awe as Harry flashed from purple to white repeatedly, and just as Harry disappeared, the dark lord grew impatient at his servant's lack of response and sends the one curse Snape couldn't block…
As Severus stared at the jet of green light that raced toward him, tears sprung to his eyes unbidden and he silently prayed that Harry would change things, wherever he sent him back to. With that thought in his head, the killing curse engulfed him and when the green light faded, Severus Snape walked among the living no longer.
Harry woke with a start. His limbs ached and his head hurt. He could feel someone stroking their hands through his hair, but he couldn't fathom who it was. He tried to open his eyes to see, but the light was blinding and it stabbed at his head like needles. He groaned in mixed disappointment and pain.
"Are you awake?"
Harry tried to answer the woman, who he could tell was a woman only by the sound of her voice, but the only sound that came from his mouth was…
The woman chuckled.
"I'll take that as a yes."
He was obliged by a straw at his lips. He sucked in the straw at his lips and started sucked in the straw and stared to gulp greedily at the water. When he couldn't drink anymore he released the straw with a small 'pop' and laid his head back against the pillows.
"Do you feel better now?"
"Yes," Harry rasped, "Where am I?"
"You are at a school called Hogwarts. Currently you are in the infirmary."
"…The hospital wing? What happened?"
"We were actually hoping you could tell us. We also would like to ask you some questions if you are up for it."
Harry tried to think of who this woman would be. He knew he heard her voice before, even if it was some distant memory. He just couldn't place her voice. When he tried to open his eyes again, he found that the light around the bed had been dimmed, and it was easy for him to open them. He turned to the blurry figure of the woman sitting in the chair beside his bed. He couldn't really see her, only the outline of her hair. Slowly, he struggled to sit up and he stretched to the side table to retrieve his glasses. When he routed a while and found nothing, he slunked back into the now upturned pillows, curtsy of the woman, and sighed.
"I… I can't really see you without my glasses."
The woman made a noise that sounded close to a stifled laugh, and produced Harry's glasses. She slid them gently onto Harry's nose and watched as he blinked, trying to get used to suddenly being able to see again.
"Thank you," He muttered before he gasped and nearly scrambled out of bed.
"H-how is this possible," Harry asked in awe, "Am… Am I dead?"
Startled by the young man's reaction, the woman got up from her seat and moved away. Harry realized that he must have frightened her, so he willed himself to calm down.
"No," The woman answered tentatively.
Harry looked at her strange and she clarified.
"You're not dead."
Harry gapped at her. This can't be true. This woman can't be who he thought she was; could she?"
"By any chance, are you," he swallowed thickly, "Lily Potter?"
The woman's eyes widened slightly before she stuttered out…
"…H-Have we m-met?"
Harry shook his head in awe. He was completely lost for words.
"Um… Is Professor Dumbledore here?"
"…Albus? Yes, he should be coming down any moment."
Harry relaxed a bit but he still found himself tense. To be in his mother's presence when he knew full well that she was dead, was unnerving.
The infirmary doors opened and in walked Albus Dumbledore; though his hair was shorted, and he seemed younger. Behind him walked the proud and menacing Severus Snape. He took one look at the boy and sneered and Harry grimaced.
"Ah, I see our young visitor is awake. How are you, my boy?"
Harry mused on the visitor bit, but answered nonetheless.
"I'm fine, professor. I'm just a bit confused. How did I get into the infirmary?"
"We found you, just outside the wards of Hogwarts. You were badly wounded and unconscious."
Harry nodded but said nothing else. He was trying to come up with an explanation as to how Lily was alive. He couldn't help but look at her, stare in more like it. The woman fidgeted uncomfortable under his scrutiny.
Dumbledore looked at Harry uncertainly. He was trying to determine if he could trust this young stranger. He was observing the way he stared at Lily and decided to ask…
"Can you tell us your name, my boy?"
Harry shook his head trying to clear it. What could possibly be happening? Could this be a dream, or an hallucination? Harry's emerald eyes flicked up to meet identical emerald eyes and he found he couldn't help himself. Tentatively, as if reaching out to a wild dog and afraid of being bitten, Harry reached out to Lily and touched her. Lily flinched at the contact but she curious to know what this young stranger would do; and that curiosity had her standing in place, watching as so many emotions flicked across the young man's face. Then, as if he was relieve to have touched a solid surface, and not have had his hand gone through her, a content sigh escaped his lips before a flood of tears followed. He held them as long as he could be he couldn't help the tears. He mother was alive, in the flesh. What miracle was this? Again his emerald eyes flickered up to meet their identical counterparts and Harry recoiled. This had to be some kind of trick, unless just maybe he had traveled back in time. That had to be it. It was the only reasonable explanation.
"Cou…" Dumbledore started but was cut off abruptly.
"Please, sir, what year is it?"
The three occupants in the room looked at him nervously. Dumbledore considered it for a moment before his eyebrows lifted in disbelief.
"It is 1980," Dumbledore stated.
Harry blanched. Thirty-two tears into the past. How was that possible?
"Can you tell us who you are now?"
Harry looked over to Lily, who had asked in a quiet tone, and shook his head.
"I don't think you would believe me. Not even if I swore under Veritaserum."
Snape, who stayed quiet, merely arched an eyebrow. His curiosity was indeed quipped.
"Try us then."
Harry sighed. He took one last look around the room before his eyes rested on Lily.
"You won hex me, will you," He asked everyone but his eyes remained on Lily.
"Not unless you become a threat," Albus stated as if trying to calm a distraught child.
Harry took a deep breath and said…
"My name is Harry. Harry Potter."
Lily's mouth hung agape, as did the rest of the occupants of the room. Severus, being the ever cool and collected, was the first to compose himself.
"Potter you say? You got to be kidding me. The only other Potter left in that blood line is currently in the presence of that insufferable dog."
"You mean, Sirius," he asked wide eyed before he clamped his hand over his mouth.
Of course Snape meant Sirius that was the only person in his time that he heard Snape refer to as suck. It slowly dawned on him that since Lily was alive, so would James and Sirius, and that was probably why Dumbledore was alive as well. Unwanted tears sprung to his eyes again, he felt his head give an aggravated pound and he slid down under the covers. His head was starting to hurt again.
"You know Sirius Black," Lily asked incredulous.
At Harry's nod Lily squeaked…
"Probably the same way I know you all I expect," Harry stated, closing his eyes tiredly.
Harry opened his eyes and looked at the headmaster.
"What year are you from?"
Harry blanched again. Should he tell them? He didn't want to frighten anyone; mainly his mother. One look into Dumbledore eyes told Harry that he had better answer truthfully or Dumbledore would know.
So with a sigh Harry said…
"I'm from the year 1997."
"What", Snape asked Lily followed with, "How is that possible?"
Harry examined the look Albus was shooting him and decided that was an 'answer the question' look.
"I don't know."
"Well, what is the last thing you remember?"
Harry thought hard. He remembered lying on concrete. He remembered being in pain. He remembered someone scooping him up and hot tears rolling down his neck as someone cried in his neck. Who was it that was crying? His eyes flicked up to meet Snape's glaring onyx orbs and blanched as a memory of Snape crying and muttering how he was going to give him a second chance to finish the dark lord, once and for all.
"The last thing I remember might get me hexed," Harry said tentatively.
Albus sighed clearly exasperated.
"No one here will harm you, Harry," Albus said in the calmest voice he could muster.
Harry pointed his finger and Severus and childishly stated;
Snape look outraged by being accused by some Potter wannabe.
"I assure you, Severus would do no such thing."
Harry didn't look convinced, though he did sigh in defeat. He told them exactly what the last thing he remembered was and was slowly recoiled as Snape seemed to get angrier and angrier.
"How dare you utter such lies? I would never in my life…"
"Now Severus, you're frightening the poor child."
"Good, I hope the insolent brat is afraid."
"Git," Harry mutter under his breath.
Lily, who was the closed to Harry, snorted back a laugh and covered it last minute with a cough. Harry grinned shyly at her.
"So, it was Severus who sent you back here?"
"So, is he good in your time then," Lily asked but it was spat in Severus' direction.
The man looked sad for only a moment, before he flicked dangerous eyes to Harry as if warning him not to utter a word as to what he was doing in the future.
"Um… You could say that," Harry answered sheepishly and Severus looked satisfied that the boy at least know that look.
"How do you know us in the future?"
Harry cringed and looked at Lily uncertainly. He didn't want to answer her question. He knew what that simple question would lead to and he had no desire to go there.
"Well," Snape growled as if offended that Harry didn't answer Lily quickly enough.
Harry turned to Albus.
"In my time you were known as Professor Dumbledore, Headmaster at Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardry."
Albus arched an eyebrow.
"Y-yea you… died."
Albus wisely chose not to say anything as he stared at the visibly shaken young man. Harry knew, or he at least hoped, that the headmaster would keep his sense about him. When Harry noticed that everyone was still staring at him expectantly, he sighed and looked at Snape.
"You are known as Professor Snape in my time, but that's not what most of the students call you. You were also known as headmaster for a time, but that didn't work out too well with Vol…Um…never mind," Harry cut himself off at the glares coming for him from all angles of the room.
"What about me?"
Harry eyes flickered to her for a brief moment before they darted to the headmaster and gave a pleading look. The headmaster seemed to take the hint because he cleared his thought and stated…
"We shall pester him for more details later. Harry looks tired and I doubt he will be much use if he falls asleep in the middle of an explanation."
Lily pouted but didn't object.
"I, personally, would like to know how the war ended," Severus stated, "So I shall come back with you. Is that acceptable?"
The headmaster nodded at his inquiry.
"Get some sleep, Mr. Potter; you will have a long evening ahead of you."
Harry yawned as if the headmaster's words had triggered a tired feeling in him and he realized that he had been fighting his sleep in favor of answering questions.
"When we return, besides the war, I shall like to know how you're a Potter namesake."
Harry stifled a groan and Lily patted him sympathetically, or warningly, he didn't know which. Once the three older occupants left the room, Harry fell into a fitful sleep.
Harry awoke to the sound of quite humming. He wondered who would dare to do that in the hospital and fought to open his eyes. Lily was sitting in a rocking chair, she must have conjured, reading a book and humming to herself. Harry wearily opened his eyes, praying that they had forgotten what he told them.
"Are you awake," Lily asked him.
Harry suddenly wished he had kept his eyes closed.
"I was thinking; maybe I know who your father is but I'm not quite sure I want to know who your mother is."
Harry just looked at her expecting her to continue.
"Is… Is your father J-James Potter?"
"Yes, your husband is my father."
Lily looked a little green.
"…and is that how you are a Potter namesake?"
Harry nodded again. Lily took a deep shuddering breathe and stated…
"…a-and your mother?"
Harry looked at her, as if finally realizing what she was afraid of.
"People tell me that I have my mother's eyes…"
Lily looked into them curiously, trying to determine who Harry's mother was with just his eyes alone. When the realization dawned on her, her eyes grew impossibly wide.
"Am I… your mother?"
Harry gave her a sad smile and nodded.
She stared at him in awe but didn't get a chance to say anything else as the door to the infirmary was opened. Albus and Severus walked in and the door clicked softly behind them.
"Good to see you have rested, my boy. We were hoping that you would awaken for dinner yesterday but alas you stayed asleep."
Harry's eyes widened.
"I slept for the rest of yesterday?"
Both Albus and Lily nodded and Severus just sneered.
"We would like you to take Veritaserum."
Harry looked like he was going to say something, but Dumbledore held up his hand.
"We just want to make sure you are not telling lies."
The quirk of Dumbledore's eyebrows told Harry that they wanted to make sure that Harry was not a spy for the dark lord. So reluctantly, Harry agreed to take the Veritaserum. Dumbledore rummaged through his robes and found it and handed it to Harry. Harry took it, uncorked it, and gulped it down. As he was handing the empty vial back to the headmaster, his eyes began to glaze as the potion kicked in. He looked straight at Severus and stated…
"You can't make that potion taste good in any timeline."
Lily snorted back a laugh and Albus stifled a chuckle. Severus merely raised an amused eyebrow, but gestured for Albus to continue.
"Please, state your full name to us."
"Harry James Potter."
"What is your birth date?"
Harry looked like he tried to resist answering the question but the answered tumbled from his lips.
"July 31, 1980."
Lily gasped and Harry jumped. When he looked over to her he saw her clutching her protruding belly. His eyes widened in turn as he noticed for the first time that the woman, his mother, was pregnant. Harry couldn't believe it.
"You're going to give birth in two months," Severus asked, shakily.
"Not that it's any of your business," Lily snapped back coldly. Snape looked sad for only a moment before his mask of indifference, in which he was famous for in the future, slid into place.
"Who is your father, Harry," Dumbledore continued as if nothing happened.
"…and your mother…"
Harry looked pointedly at Lily before answering.
She shook her head in awe again and rubbed her belly.
"Are you an enemy or an ally?"
"Ally," Harry answered without falter.
"Why were you sent back?"
"…To change the future."
"But why was I the one to send you back?"
Harry looked at Snape, Trying desperately to avoid answering the question, but it still tumbled from his mouth involuntarily,
"Because mom asked that you keep an eye on me, just in case she couldn't be there to do it herself."
"How did you lose the war?"
"I… It was me. I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't kill him. I saw him kill so many, I saw so many die. I couldn't take the thought of one more body, innocent or not, dying. So when Ron was struck with the killing curse… I… I felt useless. I couldn't even save my best mate. How could I save the world? I am to blame I…"
"Harry, was it your sole duty to defeat the dark lord. Why couldn't someone else do it?"
"…Because of the prophecy."
The room had gone deathly quiet. Snape looked pale.
"How many people died?"
Harry gulped hard before he whispered,
"…Everyone, Madam Pomfrey, Professor Mcgonagall…"
"Minerva," Albus interrupted and Harry nodded solemnly.
The only one who I survived was Pro- Sna-um," Harry trailed off unsure of what to call the younger version of his teacher.
"Severus? He survived?"
"Yes," Harry muttered, "He was alive when I saw him last."
Everyone looked astounded, even Snape himself.
"Did I die in the war," Albus asked curiously.
Harry had begun to tremble.
"N-No… You died the year before."
"Vold-uh-he made Horcruxes. You were hunting one and you picked it up, only it wasn't a Horcrux. It was something that Regulus Black left in place of a Horcrux in order to destroy the original."
"Sirius' brother," Lily questioned.
"So I died from touching the Horcrux?"
"No," Harry admitted.
"Then how did I die?"
He looked up at Snape unshed tears shimmering in his eyes.
"Did I have something to do with it," Severus asked solemnly.
"Yes," Harry said bluntly.
"I didn't know it at the time but Professor Dumbledore asked you too."
"I killed him," Severus asked in a sickened tone.
Harry nodded again.
"How do you know I killed him?
"I was there. I was hiding on the stares when you came up behind me. You put your hands to your lips and told me to be quiet. I did because Professor Dumbledore trusted you, so I would trust you too. You walked up the stairs, and sneered something to Draco that I didn't quite catch and then you were aiming your wand at him. I just sat there and watched. I couldn't do anything as the Killing curse kit him and he fell off of the astronomy tower. I felt helpless and I was suddenly angry. I chased you. I wanted to hurt you. I wanted to see you suffer just the way the headmaster did I wanted to see you dead. I tried to hit you with a spell that I learned from a potion's book but you deflected it and sneered at my insolence for trying to hit you with your own spell. You cursed me and I fell. When I came too I was furious that I couldn't stop you. It wasn't until much later that I found out that you had no choice but to kill him."
"…How about me, Harry? Did I die in the war?"
Tears started to slide down Harry's cheeks and he shook his head no.
"You died when I turned one and so did Dad. I never knew either of you; I just know that you sacrificed your lives for mine."
Harry's body began to tremble violently.
"I wished you hadn't. I wish that you both could have lived. And now that I'm here I will do everything in my power to try and prevent you from dying… both of you."
Dumbledore seemed to finally take in the boys trembling shoulders and announced.
"That's enough. I think that will be all, Severus if you please."
Severus handed Harry a vile which he eyed skeptically.
"It's the counter for the Veritaserum," Snape stated exasperatedly
Harry gulped it back. It had an instant reaction as Harry's eyes immediately began to uncloud but his shaking and trembling would not cease. When he started to hyperventilate, Severus handed him another vile, which he recognized as a Calming Drought and gulped it back as well. His body began to relax but he was feeling tired now that his rush was gone.
"I'm sorry my boy. We may have pushed too hard."
Harry said nothing as he laid on the hospital bed, trying to will his brain not to think about any more horrors. He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder and met identical emerald eyes that were shimmering with tears. Harry couldn't look at the woman who would be his mother, so, he closed his eyes and fell into a hellish sleep.
To be continued
So I hope you all like it so far. This idea wouldn't stay out of my head so I had to put it to paper. I will continue with it if you wish it but if no one likes it than I'll just discontinue it. So, make sure to tell me what you think.