I got the idea from one of Strawberii's Tokyo Mew Mew stories.

A/N I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer

BTW: Ashley is just the narrator

Monday 26th May / Period 1 Maths

I, Ashley Memiko, have decided to write all my lifes adventures in this beautiful, leather bound diary. Well, I didn't so much decide as a homeless man named Giles threw it at me and threatened to kill me if I didn't write in it then passed out in a pool of his own sick. People in Sunnydale are strange. For instance my school seems to be filled with imbeciles (Angel and Amy), retar- I mean the socially awkward, (Spike and Riley) your usual gang of popular whor- girls. (Buffy Summers, Anya Jenkins, Cordelia Chase, Harmony Kendall, Tara Maclay and Darla whatever her second name is)and nerds (Xander Harris, Willow Rosenberg and Andrew Wells), emo/goths...(Oz, Drusilla and Faith) I guess I could write down my schools going ons and then compare them to other diaries like Anne Frank's, maybe. I bet Anne Frank's school didn't have Spike who pee'd out the maths window and hit our headteacher in the eye while he was smoking a cigarette. Well, that is my first entry but I gotta go. Spike is heading my way.

Period 2 English

How the HELL would I know if Buffy is still a virgin? More importantly, why would Spike care? Because he is MADLY in love with her, that's why! Beside Buffy NEVER talks to me because she is the most popular girl in school along with Cordelia and Darla so she wouldn't give me the time of day. Actually she COULDN'T give me the time of day because in maths class she admitted she dosen't know how to tell time. How is that for maturity? She is so dumb! But judging by the way she acts I'm guessing it's a big no-no for the virgin thing. When I said this to Spike he refused to believe this. See, madly in love! But she's dating Angel, the principals son, scoring major brownie points for Buffy. I like Spike, he seems romantic. Last year, he sereneded her in the girls toilets and she threw a box of tampons at him and called him a 'pervert'. See, romantic. My teacher, Mr. Wolverine (Obviously, not his real name but he has BIG sideburns. So, yeah), begins shouting at Anya for trying to strip in class for Xander. People in my school have problems.


All of Mr. Wolverine's class has been signed up for councelling because we had to see Anya's breast. Spike just spent the first five minutes of lunch showing me the pictures he took of them. Angel and Buffy must have heard out 'Is Buffy a virgin conversation?' because they thought about it and a poll has been open about it. Amy, Willow and Tara have formed a new club called 'The Witches' and I'm not sure but I heard Buffy is planning on running them out of town with pitchforks and torches. I think Buffy needs to be drove out of town with pitchforks and torches. Where would she get a pitchfork from anyway? Does she even know what year where in?

Probably not.

Period 3 Earth Science

The poll of 'Is Buffy a virgin' still races on and Buffy is suspiciously quiet. Amy heard about Buffy's pitchfork plan and hit her over the head with a caldron so Buffy and co spent the rest of period 3 tending to Buffy's sore head.

Period 5 History

The poll is over and Buffy is NOT a virgin. Due to this the principal has forbidden Angel from dating Buffy. This has resulted in Spike going on the school's roof and yelling 'SCORE' as his crazy ex Drusilla yelled 'Jump'.

Home 6:00pm

I've just recieved seven text asking me what colour panties I think Buffy is wearing. What is WRONG with Spike! But I'm still on his side with the whole Buffy should be with him thing. That could change, though, if he sends me ONE MORE TEXT about the colour of Buffy's panties!

Buffy's little sister has just rang me informing me that, apparently, Angel dosen't care about sucking up to his dad if that means losing Buffy. Thw two were found, by Angel's dad, behind a dumpster. According to Dawn, she slapped Angel then ran behind his dad, accusing him of fondling her. She's a very good actress. Angel has been suspended for a week and he is not allowed to use any of his hair gel for a month. Oh, the horror!

Buffy was then spotted making out with Spike behing the bronze by Cordelia. What is WRONG with society?