A/N: Thank you so much for your reviews!
I think I'll be doing connected one-shots, because I didn't really see my last chapter being conclusive at all. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!
Pepper groaned as Tony set her gently in their bed. "I can't feel my face." She muttered. Her boyfriend laughed and nuzzled her cheek.
"That means that the drugs they gave you are working." He told her. "How's your leg?"
"Good girl." He kissed her forehead a few time before covering her with her favorite quilt. "Now stay here and rest, I'll be back soon!"
Walking out of the room, he snapped his fingers at Bruce who was waiting patiently right outside the door. "Do you have the x-rays?" He all but growled.
"I do, and it looks like she was very lucky considering that mostly everyone who gets shot by Hawkeye dies instantly." Dr. Banner tried to joke, but Tony's glare wiped the smile off of his face instantly. Clearing his throat he held an x-ray up to the window so they could see it better. "The arrow missed all bones and major muscles. It looks like there might be a bit of nerve damage, but it will more than likely heal if she doesn't overdo it for the next couple of weeks."
"Good. She's not leaving the bed." Stark bluntly stated. "Is that the femoral artery?" He asked pointing to the faint white lines nearly a millimeter from where the arrow had gone through.
Bruce hesitated before nodding, "Yeah, she was VERY lucky." He repeated.
Tony glared at the large film for a moment before shoving it back into his friend's arms. "Stay with her." He ordered before walking over to the elevator.
"I don't understand why the TV had to be thrown." Clint muttered, holding the dustpan for Natasha as she swept the broken glass up.
"Thor couldn't find the remote." Steve replied simply.
"It was on the couch..."
"I was in a state of panic! I had no other way to silence the giant box!"
"There are buttons on the front…"
The conversation stopped when the elevator doors swung open to reveal a very angry Tony Stark. "I'm only going to say this once." He said, entering the main room. "No more damned weapons in the living room!" He picked up the shield and threw it into Steve's room.
"I mean, it should go without saying!" Tony continued as he picked up Clint's bow and arrows, and Natasha's guns. "The LIVING room is for LIVING! Weapons are for KILLING!" He threw the weapons into their respectful rooms, flinching when one of the guns went off.
"Sorry, the safety must have been off." Natasha stated the obvious.
"It's bad enough that you guys have broken nearly all of the windows on this floor, as well as a 1.3 million dollar lab robot, but now you're trying to kill my girlfriend?"
"To be fair, it was never my intention to KILL Miss. Potts." Clint piped up. "I was coerced to shoot an arrow at a sissy boy!"
Thor chuckled, "Ha…Captain Sissy Boy!" He nodded in approval at the nickname. "I like that!"
"Can it Hanson! I'm talking!" Tony growled. "I know we're crime fighters and all, but let's save our shooting and smashing for the training rooms. Pepper is not now, or never will be a target. Understand?" They all nodded.
"It's still Steve's fault." Clint muttered, before holding his hands up in surrender when Tony shot him a look.
"You're at the top of my list Cupid, so you better watch it!" He threatened. "Now, I'm going to go tend to my drugged up lady love. And as fun as that may sound, I can assure you that I will not be using her state of mind to my advantage so it will most certainly not be. Are there any questions before I leave?"
There was a moment of silence before Thor raised his hand, "Can we get another Television?"
"No! Tony we're not watching this again!"
"But it's a new episode! Come on! It gets better the more you watch!"
"No, it's freaky!"
"Please? It'll make you more cautious if anything." He gave her his best puppy dog eyes as the first scenario of '1000 Ways to Die' began. Pepper rolled her eyes and sighed.
"Okay, one more!" She relented. "But then we're watching 'The O'Reilly Factor'."
"Ugh. Fine!" He said snottily as he turned up the volume.
Pepper was settled across his lap with an ice pack on her injured leg. She had refused to take any more of the pain pills after Tony made one too many jokes about getting her naked on the balcony.
"So you never really made it clear as to why you were in The Land of Tights and Armor this morning." He said after a few minutes of watching the gruesome show. Pepper shrugged and pretended to be interested the man on the TV screen, slamming himself into a window.
"No reason…Hey is this based on Garry Hoy's death?"
"Yeah, I guess so. They show all kinds of idiots on here." Tony muttered as they watched the man crash through the window and plummet to his death. "You never go down there though. You said it smells like old peanut butter."
"It did, but they figured out that it was coming from Steve's socks." Pepper replied. "Um, if they're about to show this man get eaten by a wood chipper I'm done!"
"My god! Is my little Pepper Potts evading the question?"
"No!" She said quickly. "I'm just watching this um…this program that you love so much!"
"Oh please! Yesterday you started licking my neck right in the middle of an episode."
"I did not!"
"Yes you did!"
"I kissed you."
"Yeah! With your tongue!"
"Why were you downstairs?"
Pepper glared at him before turning back to the TV. "I may, or may not have been going down there to plan a certain party for a certain billionaire who shall not be named." She murmured.
"Never mind…you're throwing me a surprise party?" He asked in surprise.
"Well I was going to. But I believe what sets a surprise party apart from a regular party is you not knowing about it beforehand." Pepper explained. "So now I'm just throwing you a party."
"Well I enjoy the thought either way." Tony assured her with a kiss to the cheek. Pepper smiled and rested her head on his shoulder.
A sudden voice from the elevator startled them out of their moment. "Oh yes! I love this show!" The couple jumped and turned to see his five teammates in bounding into the room.
"Oh for the love of all that is holy!" Tony groaned rubbing his forehead.
"Is this the one where the guy gets run over by a steamroller while using a porta-potty?" Natasha asked plopping down in an arm chair next to the couch,
"No, this is the one where the nymphomaniac dies from…too much… carrot…" Clint trailed off when Pepper and Nat gave him similar glares.
"What?" Bruce squinted his eyes as if trying to work out a mathematical equation. "How is that even possible? What force could she have used to have caused death?"
"What is a nympho…nympho…?" Thor questioned turning to Steve who looked just as bewildered.
"What is happening right now?" Tony demanded.
"Thor broke the cable box too, and the only DVD we have to watch is Shrek 2, so after watching that three times, we thought we'd see what you guys were doing." Natasha explained casually.
"We're planning the perfect murder. Anyone want to be our lab rat?" Stark growled with a manic look in his eyes.
"Tony, relax." Pepper sighed. "It's only eight o'clock. Let them hang out up here for a little while."
"Oh you are very kind Woman of Ironman." Thor said with a smile.
"Oh…you can definitely call me…not that…" Pepper forced a laugh while Tony beamed.
"No, no. We like that title." He said. "Continue with that one God of Hipsters."
"What is this show?" Steve asked, staring at the screen in repulsion.
"Oh! That's how the carrot did it!" Bruce raised his eyebrows at the new enlightenment. "Good to know!"
"Gentlemen, you can sit down!" Pepper said, gesturing the couch.
At the same time, Thor and Steve jumped over the back of the sofa. Of course since they failed to look before they leapt, they landed directly on Pepper's legs.
"Ow! Son of a Bi—"
Maria Hill sighed when she walked into the Avengers' empty living quarters. "This is the second time that super ninny has stood me up…" She muttered digging her phone out of her hand bag.
Just as she was about to dial, she heard a loud commotion on the floor above her, followed by the roar of the Hulk.
A/N: Okay, this chapter may have been slightly boring, but it will pick up! I promise!
I'm having a hard time deciding on whom I ship more Hill/Thor or Hill/Steve. I think they would both be adorable. I like Betty, so I don't have the heart to put Bruce with anyone else! Let me know what you guys would like to see for my next chapter!